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Zeroing Out the Moleskine, vol. 242

October 18, 2012 By Jeff 112 Comments

By the way, before we get started here…  I want to make it clear that I don’t REALLY use a Moleskine notebook.  They’re fairly pretentious.  Also, they cost about twelve bucks each, versus the ones I buy at Target for a dime.

The only time I used an actual Moleskine was during our trip to England.  It fit perfectly in my jacket pocket, and I’d take it to the pub after dinner, have a few Boddington’s (it was only Boddington’s or Stella Artois in the hotel bar), and scribble down the day’s events.

I liked that little notebook, and decided to buy another one for everyday use.  But it didn’t take.  I felt like a douche whenever I’d break it out, and quickly switched back to the tried and true ten-cent Back to School special. For some reason I don’t feel as self-conscious with a regular notebook.

Also, I’ve been using the Evernote phone app, more and more.  It’s starting to take the place of notebooks, and eventually I’ll make the switch completely.  It’s a great tool for jotting down insensitive thoughts and observations, and I use it every day.  I also have Evernote installed on my two computers, and can view my notes on any of them.  Everything goes to a cloud drive, and I love it.  Plus, it’s free.

What’s the most pretentious thing in your life?  Or, more precisely… what’s something you use (or do) that could be misconstrued as pretentious?  Please tell us about it.

I was looking at boxer briefs a few weeks ago.  Every pair I own has collapsed, and some should probably be burned or buried.  It doesn’t take long… three or four months and they’re shot.  I thought I could maybe buy a better quality, and they’d last longer.  So, I looked at Macy’s (I think), and almost swallowed my tongue.  I checked out Calvin Klein, and that sort of thing… and they cost $25 per pair!  I about shat.

There’s simply no way.  My wiener would probably start putting on airs, and maybe even take to wearing an ascot and monocle.  Talk about pretentious!  My scrotum will be seated in only the world’s finest fabrics…

So, like the notebooks, I’ll just stick with the tried and true.  If it’s good enough for Michael Jordan, it’s good enough for me.  Screw it.  Sure, they become distended and misshapen after six or eight washings, but I’m not paying $25 for a single ball sock.  Good god!

What do you have on this subject?  Is there anything in your life that might cause assholes to snort derisively, and mumble ‘what a pretentious cock’?  If so, now’s your chance to confess.  Also, have you ever avoided things you might otherwise enjoy, for fear of being perceived as a pretentious cock?  You know, like a Moleskine notebook, or up-town britches?

Shit, this was supposed to be a one paragraph disclaimer…

I’ve started watching Freaks and Geeks on Netflix.  They just added it to the streaming service, and I don’t think I’ve seen it since it originally aired.  What a great show.  It, and My So-Called Life, are two of the best TV programs about the challenging middle school and high school experience.

Paul Feig, who created Freaks and Geeks, has written two memoirs.  The first is about his pre-teen years, and the second is about high school and beyond.  In Superstud, the second book, there’s an excruciating chapter in which he describes the night he almost became a paraplegic, while trying to give himself a blowjob.  An entire chapter… with loads of detail.

Yes, it’s quite memorable.  I read a lot, and enjoy the offbeat shit, but that particular section of his second book sticks out in my mind.  Is there such a thing as too much honesty?  Perhaps, but I’m glad some folks don’t recognize society’s rules.

What’s your favorite coming-of-age movie or TV show?  And is there a moment in a book you’ve read, which made you think, “Holy shit.  If that ever happened to me, I’d never tell a person about it!”  What jumps immediately to mind?  If someone asked me that question, I’d blurt, PAUL FEIG TRYING TO BLOW HIMSELF!!  Without a moment’s hesitation.

Finally, did you ever build model cars, and that sort of thing?  Some of you youngsters might not even know what I’m talking about, but the old farts do.  I tried to get into it when I was a kid, but it was too much like math.  There was only one way of doing it, no room for improvisation, and I don’t do well in those circumstances.

Steve – who is a math professor now – LOVED building models.  And I – who sat in the back of every math class and made sarcastic remarks – couldn’t stand it.  Why not just buy an already put together car?  That’s what I always wanted to know.  Why in God’s name would you want to purchase a million parts that can be glued together to create a plastic car??  It made no sense to me.  It was a giant hassle in a box.

But every kid back then dabbled in it, so I gave it shot.  And it wasn’t for me, so I moved on. Sort of like my experience with the Baptist church… I also couldn’t stand those ridiculous LEGO sets my kids would get when they were younger.  Not just regular LEGO sets, but ones that went together to create a pirate ship, or whatever.  They made me insane, just like model cars did in the 1970s.

Did you ever mess with those things?  There was a store in Dunbar (House of Toys) that had a giant wall of model kits – literally hundreds to choose from – and I don’t think anyone even sells them anymore.  What’s your experience with that dubious fad?  Steve’s room was filled with them, and I think I had one or two that looked like a monkey with severe head injuries tried to put them together.

I’m calling it a day, my friends.  Have yourselves a great weekend!

I’ll see ya soon.

Now playing in the bunker
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Comments

  1. lucas says

    October 18, 2012 at 6:07 pm

    I used to build model cars, and model robots. In also had a HUUUUGE Lego collection.

    Now I’m about to graduate with a BS in physics and one in computer engineering. And I minored in math….

    Yeah. I’m a nerd

    First?

    Reply
    • Uncle_Wedgie says

      October 19, 2012 at 3:03 pm

      Well, with all of those degrees you can still count to one. Me, if forgot the basics when I went on to higher learning.

      Reply
  2. lucas says

    October 18, 2012 at 6:07 pm

    Fuck. Yeah.

    Reply
  3. Vicki says

    October 18, 2012 at 6:07 pm

    There’s a 1964 Chevy something or other on the mantel in one of our bedrooms…John’s finest work from his middle childhood. Pretty sure he would have a heart attack if I hid it away. He did do a pretty perfect job on it, though, I will certainly admit.

    Reply
    • Vicki says

      October 18, 2012 at 6:15 pm

      Now he confesses that the great majority of his model car portofolio suffered horrible ends. Lighter fluid and fire. Why do guys love to burn shit?

      Reply
      • Vicki says

        October 18, 2012 at 6:15 pm

        portfolio. Damn, the pretentious beer we drink goes straight to my head.

        Reply
      • Dave says

        October 19, 2012 at 6:58 pm

        I used to incorporate explosives of various kinds into my model building

        Reply
      • The Qweezy Mark says

        October 19, 2012 at 7:55 pm

        Fire is cool. Blowin’ shit up is cool. We’ve been emasculated by modern society and must make up for it.

        Reply
        • dto says

          October 19, 2012 at 9:40 pm

          I saw, “The Summer of 42”, when it came out when I was 16. Great movie and a great tune to go with it. My fave coming of age flick I saw when I guess I was coming of age.

          Reply
          • dto says

            October 19, 2012 at 9:45 pm

            I have no idea why this is here and after all these years there is still no edit button. Crap!

            Reply
  4. airandee says

    October 18, 2012 at 6:09 pm

    I built a few models in my youth until I got airplane glue in my eye. And no I was not huffing it. Just goofing off.

    Reply
  5. lucas says

    October 18, 2012 at 6:10 pm

    I keep joking about getting the moleskine notebooks with the graphing paper so I can jot down little designs and equations and junk.

    I’ll never get one… I use the ones I get at staples that cost dollar… a. Whole. Dollar… so expensive….

    Reply
  6. lucas says

    October 18, 2012 at 6:11 pm

    My latest market del is a computer map of the new York harbor and surrounding waterways and land masses…. its my thesis project….

    Reply
  7. icecycle66 says

    October 18, 2012 at 6:37 pm

    A coming-of-age movie or TV show/

    I’d have to say…scrambled porn being beemed in by a swimming pool sized satalite dish. If you did all the fine tuning on the apiture just right you could get a pretty steady screen. The collors were all like photo negatives, but that was fine.

    It just looked like giant purple alien boobs and black, eh…excretions.

    Reply
  8. t-storm says

    October 18, 2012 at 6:52 pm

    I was a model airplane guy. I wasn’t super good at it, at least not next to my artist best friend. Like mona lisa on an etch a sketch artist. Jerk.

    We once put a pipe bomb in a model b-36, strung it on wire between my house and garage and blew that thing to shit. My mom threw the tape out when I was in college, but it was awesome!

    Reply
  9. Tiff says

    October 18, 2012 at 6:54 pm

    pretentious…no. I save that for my conversations, in which I usually use too many big words and confuse people. I used to use a fountain pen to take notes in class, a very pretentious thing to do, but that was when there were no computers and recording the class seemed like something stupid people would do who couldn’t take notes fast enough, and I’m a leftie so pencils were right out….

    Also, that time I built a funny-car model. That was pretty freaking over the top snotty.

    Reply
    • johnthebasket says

      October 19, 2012 at 4:41 am

      Now that the McCarthy era is over, lefties should feel free to go ahead and write down whatever they want.

      John

      Reply
  10. Sunshine_in_va says

    October 18, 2012 at 7:01 pm

    Only cool people built models. Hell – I still do. 7 or 8 years ago, I bought several different models of WWII Navy landing craft, painted them up and put the decals of my Dad’s ship on them and gave some away at his Navy reunion. When I was a kid, my favorites were the 1968 Camaro, some big “chop-daddy” motorcycle and a B-52 bomber that had a wing-span of about two feet.

    And I won’t even tell you what I used to do in model railroading 30 years ago. Nor about blowing myself…..

    Reply
  11. Jorge says

    October 18, 2012 at 7:03 pm

    I am strictly a fruit of the loom guy. $25 for a single pair of drawers? The only people with that kind of dough are Saudi princes and guys who are a part of a “cartel” of some kind.

    I want to be pretentious, but I don’t pull it off well. I think I have white collar tastes and a blue collar sensibility. For example, I’d like a BMW for my next car, but it’s most likely going to be a Ford Fusion.

    On the other hand, I own my own tuxedo even though I’m not a classical musician or a magician. I bought it because I believe rented tuxes fit poorly and I wanted to get married in clothes that were tailored correctly.

    I also have a slightly formal vocabulary sometimes (think Winchester from M*A*S*H without the Boston accent). That can seem times sound a bit off, but I don’t care.

    Coming of age movies…. The Breakfast Club first, then probably anything with Lee Marvin.

    I built lots of models as a kid and got pretty into it for a few years. One of these days I’m going to try my hand at a wooden ship model. I bought a kit cheap at a yard sale and plan to start it when I’m out of projects around the house. That shouldn’t take more than 20 or so years.

    Never had the interest or aptitude for math, definitely made a lot of sarcastic comments and was a salesman and then a nurse. I have no idea if that means anything or not.

    Great questions today. I like updates that touch on a bunch of topics. A veritable melange, if you will.

    See what I did there?

    Reply
  12. Hendeson says

    October 18, 2012 at 7:05 pm

    How many times do I have to go over this topic???

    Get your ass down to Macy’s or Dillards or similar and get some flippin’ name-brand underwear. Hanes is NOT a name brand. Try Tommy or Ralph Lauren or something. I’ve got underwear going on 10 years old. You’ll save money in the long run, your balls will be happier, and you’ll have something pretentious.

    BTW: get black.

    Reply
  13. The Qweezy Mark says

    October 18, 2012 at 7:21 pm

    I’m Bill Devane and I’m buyin’ up all the fuckin’ gold. East shit!

    Reply
    • Joe T. says

      October 19, 2012 at 10:36 am

      LOL!

      Reply
  14. chill says

    October 18, 2012 at 8:03 pm

    Good update!

    Things that could be construed as pretentious… When I hand-write a date, I do it Brit-style: “18 Oct” rather than “10/18”. The reason is that one time I got extremely frustrated with binders full of schematics for a Belgian-made video projector, trying to tell which ones were newer. The drawings all had dates like “9/7” and “12/3”.

    As a kid I loved building models: plenty of cars but mostly airplanes, plus the odd ship here and there. The good kits were made by Revell; the Aurora ones were kind of shitty, or maybe I preferred P-51s to super heroes.
    .

    Reply
  15. Limey says

    October 18, 2012 at 8:31 pm

    I have the same pile of underwear that I had when I first met my wife, 12 years ago. It’s probably 14 years old. I know because it amuses her that she has binders of my ancient underwear to wash in her laundry room. Some of it will need to be replaced soonish. Guess what, that 12 year old underwear is Calvin Klein stuff. Sometimes you get what you pay for.

    I stamped on the few models I tried to make. I do not have the temperament for that shit.

    Reply
    • dto says

      October 18, 2012 at 8:42 pm

      Sweet sainted mother of Skid Mark. !2 to probably 14 year old underwear? And you’re proud of that?? Jesus Christ dude….really? I do Hane’s tighty whities. Two new six packs every year.

      Reply
      • Limey says

        October 18, 2012 at 9:06 pm

        Apparently I’ve learnt how to wipe my arse like an adult 😉

        I have shoes that are 20+ years old. They were expensive, but not as expensive as buying a $100 pair of crap shoes at WalMart every year for the last 20 years…

        Reply
        • dto says

          October 18, 2012 at 9:17 pm

          Wal-Mart sells $100 shoes? I pay up for my cowboy boots and hiking boots and everyday shoes (athletics) and they last. and last. Underwear is a disposable commodity and need not be kept around for 14 years.

          Reply
  16. Limey says

    October 18, 2012 at 8:34 pm

    Every two weeks I have to spend the day working out in the boonies. I need an internet connection while I’m working so I take my iPad, and the knuckle dragging locals look at me like I’m a pretentious nose-breathing asshole for using the thing.

    Reply
  17. Ed says

    October 18, 2012 at 8:38 pm

    When I was a kid I liked to make models of the great philosophers, and scale models of the works of famous architects. Some of these I would burn with airplane glue, the rest I would destroy with firecrackers.

    Reply
    • Uncle_Wedgie says

      October 19, 2012 at 5:25 pm

      Ok, I’m creeped out.

      Reply
      • Ed says

        October 21, 2012 at 10:08 am

        Hey, don’t be too creeped out! I was was just linking two disparate topics in the original post.

        Reply
  18. Biff says

    October 18, 2012 at 11:37 pm

    Hobby Lobby still carries a shitload of model cars, motorcycles, etc.

    Reply
  19. Ginger says

    October 18, 2012 at 11:48 pm

    The first thing that came to mind for me, regarding pretentiousness, was how and what I eat, and how many people take great offense at my choices. I eat very, very healthfully and I’m very particular about not only calories, but quality of ingredients. I worked really hard to get where I am and my choices are not a judgment on yours! If the food in front of me is sub-par, I’m not going to eat it AND YOU CAN’T MAKE ME! Heck yes, I buy $26/cheese and organic fruit, why do you care?! You eat what you want and I’ll eat what I want! Its like kindergarten all over again, “Let Ginger worry about Ginger and you worry about you.”

    And no, I never criticize other’s food choices, that is your own business. Do whatever makes you happy, and so will I, even if that means spending twice as much on pretentious fruit!

    Reply
    • Ginger says

      October 18, 2012 at 11:49 pm

      $26/lb cheese. Oops, blinded by rage.

      Reply
      • T. Farty McAppleass says

        October 19, 2012 at 3:15 am

        What kind of cheese is that?

        Reply
        • chill says

          October 19, 2012 at 6:25 am

          I have here a piece of cheese labeled “Beaufort Summer Chabert Eighths”. It’s 24.99 a pound, so almost.
          .

          Reply
          • Ginger says

            October 29, 2012 at 11:43 am

            Sorry, I never saw the question – the cheese I was referring to is Lamb Chopper by Cypress Grove Chevre. It kills me when my kids scarf it, but I cannot blame them – it is fantastic.

            Reply
        • Root 66 says

          October 19, 2012 at 8:57 am

          Clearly, it’s NOT Velveeta!

          Reply
          • madz1962 says

            October 19, 2012 at 10:19 am

            Cheese prices have friggin’ skyrocketed. Even American cheese can go up to $6.99 pound. I try to stock up on Cabot’s Seriously Sharp Cheddar when it goes on sale. I could eat the whole block in one sitting!

            Reply
            • Jason says

              October 19, 2012 at 2:06 pm

              We buy the fuck outta havarti. But I couldn’t tell you what it cost per pound.

              Reply
        • Uncle_Wedgie says

          October 19, 2012 at 5:27 pm

          Can you fuck it? Do you have to wear a sign if you are caught doing it?

          Reply
          • Jason says

            October 20, 2012 at 10:54 am

            Your softer cheeses are good for fucking. That would be your Velveeta (ideal for fucking), Brie, most goat cheeses, blue cheese, and even cream cheese and cottage cheese. Harder cheeses such as parmesan, pecorino, and sharp cheddar aren’t suitable for fucking. So I hear.

            Reply
  20. Knucklehead says

    October 19, 2012 at 1:25 am

    I’m with Ginger. The way I eat. When I go back to the States, they can’t MAKE me go to a chain restaurant and then call me a ‘food snob’. Yeah, what of it? I was like that when I lived in SF, too.
    That and maybe the $15,000 I have in shoes from when I was an Architectural Rep. I like Donald Pliner, what can I say? (They’re all languishing in their boxes here.)

    Happy Friday, Surfers!

    Reply
    • Max says

      October 19, 2012 at 12:59 pm

      As long as you didn’t pay $900 for a pair of the “sneakers,” I can respect that. I wish I had the money to buy those shoes; I need to class up my wardrobe.

      Reply
      • Knucklehead says

        October 21, 2012 at 2:05 am

        Nah – the only sneakers I wear are Converse. I have to buy them Stateside, though – they’re €85 here!

        Reply
  21. Jason says

    October 19, 2012 at 3:24 am

    I have one pretentious thing that I hide like a dead body. On our first anniversary my wife got me a straight razor and all the shit that goes with it. I’ve been using it ever since. It’s nice not having to buy those goddamn space ships that they sell as razors now. But when we go somewhere I carry disposables. I’m not going to be a douche and strap my razor in the hallway of some hotel. God.

    I have some of those plastic model cars in my garage. Still in the box. Untouched. I’ve had them for 30 years and won’t throw them away because I know that as soon as I do I’ll see some just like them on Antiques Roadshow and they’ll be worth a fortune. That’s my reason for keeping almost everything I have – it might be worth a fortune. That’s a phobia I’ve had ever since I threw away my original copy of the U.S. Constitution and then found out it was probably worth millions. Not really.

    I never got the gluing together model shit either.

    Reply
    • chill says

      October 19, 2012 at 6:38 am

      They probably wouldn’t let that straight razor on an airplane anyway.

      The model kits might well be worth a fortune, but that doesn’t help you if you hold on to them. A buddy of mine just paid $90 for a never-opened toy from the 1960s at a flea market in WV, then sold it on ebay for $3000. So it’s worth looking into.
      .

      Reply
  22. Phil Jett says

    October 19, 2012 at 7:36 am

    I put together many models for my HO railroad layout. My favorite was an enormous Godzilla model that I had stomping on a smashed up steam engine.

    I also posed people in the layout in sexual positions. The wife made me remove them when the kids got old enough to start noticing things.

    Favorite coming of age movie, Sixteen candles. No more yankie my wankie. The Donger need food.

    Reply
  23. Root 66 says

    October 19, 2012 at 8:54 am

    Criminey…I must be SUCH a nerd! I put together all sorts of models (mostly airplanes) as a young’un, mainly because we didn’t have an Atari 2600 to keep me entertained. I was never really good at it, either. Most of my models looked like they were assembled by Pablo Picasso, or Salvador Dali or something! Had an HO train layout, too…and model rockets…and was in marching band. Now that I think of it, how in the world did I ever get married when I was such a geek?!?

    Reply
  24. Jimbo says

    October 19, 2012 at 8:59 am

    Jeff, I’d encourage you to try the pretentious boxer briefs just once… I also used to go with the Champion underwear that was 3-for-$10 or whatever. But then I bought a couple of pairs of Under Armour boxer briefs for running, and they’ve now become an item for everyday use. A couple of observations:

    1) The Under Armour has lasted for four years so far. And they look exactly as good as when they were first bought. No signs of wear at all.

    2) They don’t get stretched funny by the end of the day… that was always a problem with the cheapo boxer briefs, with the elastic leg holes getting loose and feeling weird by nighttime.

    I love the Under Armour stuff. Like someone else mentioned, you get what you pay for.

    Reply
    • dto says

      October 19, 2012 at 10:55 am

      I pay up for my long johns and thermal long sleeves. Not the stuff from Family Dollar. I live in them starting this time of year. (…it’s been 22 in the morning here). I don’t consider them disposable like my tighty whities. Got longuns on right now actually.

      Reply
    • Max says

      October 19, 2012 at 1:03 pm

      I haven’t stepped up to the Under Armour stuff yet, but I’ve been wearing boxer-briefs of the same material for years now. They are definitely more expensive, but they are fantastic. I think they wear better than normal cotton boxers under anything from jeans to suit pants.

      Reply
    • WB in OH says

      October 19, 2012 at 3:23 pm

      Do they come in light blue?

      Reply
  25. Ognir says

    October 19, 2012 at 9:11 am

    Old model kits go for a lot of money on Ebay.

    It often amazes me to see something my parents paid a couple of bucks for – now sell for 10 or 20 times what it originally costs.

    That makes me feel old.

    I was way into model building. I probably still would be – if I had the space to do it.

    Reply
  26. Root 66 says

    October 19, 2012 at 9:26 am

    Cruising around on my “Blizzaks” might be viewed as pretentious by some…

    Reply
    • Jason says

      October 19, 2012 at 9:50 am

      The truly pretentious ride around in non blizzaks, as if they aren’t endangering the lives of everyone else with their sub par tires. They like to live on the edge until their foolishness causes their brains to be scattered all over the road. It’s like playing Russian roulette. So pretentious.

      Reply
  27. madz1962 says

    October 19, 2012 at 9:31 am

    Never did any models – I think my brother attempted some care thing back in the day. We used to like doing jigsaw puzzles if that’s in the same category.

    I LOVED “My So-Called Life.” Too bad it was only on for one season. Clare Danes was adorable back then. Now she looks like every other Hollywood actress.

    One of my all time favorite sorta/kinda coming of age movies is “How Green Was My Valley” with a very young Roddy McDowell.

    Pretentious? I don’t eat anything from anybody’s unknown kitchen. When someone at work brings shit in, I walk away. Cupcakes, brownies – I love them all but won’t eat that crap from the slobs I work with.

    Reply
    • Root 66 says

      October 19, 2012 at 9:39 am

      That’s not pretentious, that’s self-preservation. No tellin’ what kind of funk you could be eating!

      Reply
      • madz1962 says

        October 19, 2012 at 10:23 am

        True… I see their daily dirty work habits so you know the homes are so much worse.

        It amazes me how some fairly intelligent people with higher educations willingly shove anything into their pie holes. It all amuses me.

        Reply
  28. C1-NRB says

    October 19, 2012 at 10:14 am

    You know laptop carrying bags that are usually made out of nylon an/or canvas? I bought myself a full grain leather one about a year ago to use as a office bag/briefcase.

    It is so premium and oh, so pretentious.

    Reply
    • madz1962 says

      October 19, 2012 at 10:21 am

      I want one! In the ’80s, I used tohave a really nice leather briefcase. So it just makes sense to get a nice leather computer bag. I don’t like this nylon POS I have now.

      Reply
    • dto says

      October 19, 2012 at 10:41 am

      I just got a new laptop. Broke the old one. Closed the lid with the mouse on the keyboard. Shattered the display screen. Looks like broken glass. A new spiffy nylon messenger style bag came with it. Excellant quality but man a really cool saddle bag style leather one would compliment my pompus ass attitude nicely.

      Reply
  29. chill says

    October 19, 2012 at 11:34 am

    Oh yeah… Breakfast Club. I had a crush on Molly Ringwald.
    .

    Reply
  30. dto says

    October 19, 2012 at 11:35 am

    I did cars, planes, warships and all sorts of gule and paints. I was pretty much into it. Perfect paint jobs were a must. My fave thing was balsa wood airplanes. X-Acto knives and blueprints were involved. I’d forgotten how fun that was. Might buy a kit. Maybe this…

    http://www.amazon.com/Guillows-Douglas-DC3-Model-Kit/dp/B0006GZ382/ref=sr_1_18?s=toys-and-games&ie=UTF8&qid=1350660556&sr=1-18&keywords=balsa+model+airplane+kits

    Reply
    • Rick says

      October 22, 2012 at 5:04 pm

      Ha, I have that kit. I haven’t started it yet, but soon… 🙂

      Reply
    • Ed says

      October 22, 2012 at 7:25 pm

      I loved those things, especially the biplanes, because the model was constructed pretty much like the real thing.

      Reply
    • chill says

      October 22, 2012 at 8:10 pm

      That looks like an awesome kit. Of course, who doesn’t love a DC-3? And once again I’ll put in a rave for the now-long-gone Polk’s Toy and Hobby Shop in midtown Manhattan. They had four-cylinder gas engines for your flying models! Among other things.
      .

      Reply
  31. required says

    October 19, 2012 at 4:15 pm

    Quality is not pretentious! Pretentious is looking down on someone because you believe your choices are better than theirs.

    Reply
    • T. Farty McAppleass says

      October 20, 2012 at 10:57 am

      What if your choices ARE better than theirs? Is it still pretentious?

      Reply
  32. t-storm says

    October 19, 2012 at 4:19 pm

    Holy crap. I received my first paycheck since may today. It feels good. 14 months unemployed with a 3 month stint in Vegas. I’m finally back doing what I do best.
    Sorry this is off topic but seeing that wad of cash and digging myself out of my poverty hole feels good.

    Reply
    • dto says

      October 19, 2012 at 4:34 pm

      Too cool for you t-storm! Highest congrats I can offer without a hug because that would be weird. This Deshute’s Mirror Pond I just poured is in you honor.

      Reply
      • chill says

        October 19, 2012 at 11:14 pm

        Deschutes is awesome. Wish I could get it here on the east coast.
        .

        Reply
    • Greg says

      October 19, 2012 at 4:48 pm

      Congrats, t-storm! Great news!! The pressure’s finally off!!

      Reply
      • t-storm says

        October 19, 2012 at 4:51 pm

        I think the worst part was getting the job 8/28 and a start date on 10/1 and worrying about background checks and moving and everything else that can go wrong. I moved into an apartment in mesa last night. And two weeks ago they opened mesas first brewery.

        Reply
        • Greg says

          October 19, 2012 at 5:02 pm

          Perfect timing on the brewery. Almost sounds like they knew you were coming!

          Reply
        • madz1962 says

          October 19, 2012 at 5:02 pm

          Excellent, t-storm. Congratulations!

          Reply
        • Knucklehead says

          October 21, 2012 at 2:07 am

          Congrats, t!

          Reply
    • chill says

      October 19, 2012 at 11:13 pm

      Congrats, T!

      The poverty hole sucks a huge dick, and it’s great that you’re climbing out of it.
      .

      Reply
    • bikerchick says

      October 20, 2012 at 10:14 am

      Awesome T! Make us proud!

      Reply
    • Jason says

      October 20, 2012 at 10:58 am

      Glad you got a job, homie. Congratulations. Don’t fuck it up.

      Reply
  33. hollerbabe says

    October 19, 2012 at 4:28 pm

    Liz Claiborne handbag. My daughter gave me a used one and as soon as I figured out that people took one look at that thing and thought I was a RB, I put it up and dragged out my Thrift Store $5 special. I coulda been mugged, ya know. I have gone up to $10 on those, tho, because I had to give up on spending $10 on a purse in the stores. All of them are at least $20 now. Way too much. I do not accessorize. I carry around crap that I or the people with me may need while we are out.

    As for underwear, I swear there was an article in a Weekly Reader I got in third grade (52 yar’n ago) that said they were going to start making underwear with paper. I remember thinking smugly, “Well, if they do that, I just won’t buy it.” Little did I know I would have no choice. Fer cryin out loud–you pay middle dollar (not top, but definitely not the bottom of the line either–no pun intended), and in less than 3 months, they tear when you look at them wrong. Damn things start dissolving. Used to be able to get good drawers at Sears. Sears was trustworthy (I think I griped about them yesterday). Not any more. These days, every new batch of anything is suspect. Especially if the packaging says “New and Improved!” I really hate to see those words. And as if paper wasn’t bad enough, now they make clothing with plastic. Of course, that’s how polyester got its name, but I’m talking about real (probably recycled grocery bag), make ya sweat and break out in a rash plastic. ew. The only thing left for me to do at this point is toss it when I start playing the “What if you have to go to the emergency room?” tape in my head and comfort myself with the realization that when I throw one pair away, I can go buy a package of three to take its place.

    As for holding on to things that will be worth something someday. I guess my kids is it for me. Everything else (except those pretty scarves I got rid of, dangit) is worth about as much as the paper bags it came in back then. My husband had a fabulous baseball card collection. He left it tucked safely into his bedroom closet when he went away to college. His mom threw it out during some sort of housecleaning binge….I guess even collecting for the future is some kind of gift. My kids have turned out pretty well, tho, for the most part.

    Reply
  34. Alex says

    October 19, 2012 at 4:46 pm

    I went through a lot of glue and plastic in my youth. Still got a few hiding on top of a bookshelf that survived the mayhem. Got back into building a few after I graduated college with the goal of full detailing. Did a couple and figured looking at internet porn would be better use of my time. =-)

    Reply
  35. Kevindust says

    October 19, 2012 at 11:11 pm

    Pretentious? My favourite band is Tool. Tool is one of those bands where “if you get it” you realise that they are quite possibly the greatest music band on earth, ever. If you say that Tool isn’t very good or sucks, we say that Tool is so musically complex that they are above your level of competence. “I love Tool but I hate their fans” is a common phrase, though perhaps not as common as “I like U2 music but I hate their fans/politics”

    Anyway, name any band that you have ever liked and I guarantee you that Tool is better. Pretentious, yes…but still true. Here is Tool covering one of the other greatest bands of all time: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iNUq-JSXvS4

    Reply
    • chill says

      October 19, 2012 at 11:51 pm

      You want pretentious? I got pretentious right here. People think I’m all fancy-pants for being a Gentle Giant fan. I think this band has the complexity thing down cold: multiple time signatures in the same song? Check. A capella vocal fugues? Check. Odd meters, strange chords? Check. Oh, and Hammond B3. Every band member is a multi-instrumentalist.

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oK4cuXJa7QE – listen if you can. In the same sense as “Mad River Glen – Ski it if you can”. Some of you may have seen that bumper sticker.

      Yes, it’s 70s prog – what of it? Everyone’s favorite music is the Soundtrack of Puberty.
      .

      Reply
      • chill says

        October 20, 2012 at 12:02 am

        And remember, breakfast without orange juice is like Genesis without Peter Gabriel.
        .

        Reply
        • johnthebasket says

          October 20, 2012 at 6:06 am

          If you’re gonna go Prog, go all the way. This is how we got into Viet Nam, got a little hooked on coke, got a little married a little too young, and this is how I became emotionally involved with King Crimson all those years ago. The first 30 is quiet. The rest isn’t.

          John

          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-6_B6zhENrQ

          Reply
          • chill says

            October 20, 2012 at 11:12 am

            That song is what got me interested in KC many years ago; been an off-and-on fan ever since. I’ve only seen them once, which was on the Power to Believe tour.
            .

            Reply
            • Kevindust says

              October 21, 2012 at 7:27 am

              Good stuff, I’m somewhat familliar with KC but Gentle Giant is new to me. Keep the noise coming. Here is another brilliant band, Between the Buried and Me. The harsh vocals in the first two minutes will turn off 95% of you…but I implore you to keep going (or just skip to the 2:06 mark) the guitar section at 4:09 is beautiful, he does sweeps that don’t sound like sweeps. The bass is alive throughout. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ypOKQ2Jnrxc

              Reply
              • chill says

                October 21, 2012 at 10:19 am

                That’s actually quite good. Some nice bass work there. That first couple of minutes of vocals, though – is there a name for that style of singing? Seems like I’ve been hearing it a lot; Bad Religion comes to mind.

                For serious noise there’s always Throbbing Gristle – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y8klW9trVTQ – but I can only take them in small doses.
                .

                Reply
                • Kevindust says

                  October 21, 2012 at 11:16 am

                  This could easily be viewed as pretentious, writing a song in 9,8,7 and phrasing the lyrics in the Fibonacci sequence…but they make it work. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wS7CZIJVxFY

                • chill says

                  October 21, 2012 at 12:02 pm

                  Interesting… I have this album, but I never noticed that.

                  I also see that the guy states in the video that “When the 13 tracks of this Tool album are reordered in a Fibonacci sequence, they flow better; the end of each track exactly matches the beginning of the next one. 6, 7, 5, 8, 4, 9, 13, 1, 12, 2, 11, 3, 10.” That may indeed be a better order, but it’s hardly a Fibonacci sequence. I’ll try listening to it that way anyway.
                  .

                • johnthebasket says

                  October 21, 2012 at 7:17 pm

                  I tried playing it in that order, but I put too many divots in the record. Guess that’s why my friends call me Shakey.

                  John

                • johnthebasket says

                  October 21, 2012 at 7:20 pm

                  You know, 6, 7, 5, 8, 4, 9, 13, 1, 12, 2, 11, 3, 10 isn’t even a Fibonacci sequence when you translate it into the German Enigma Code and back, which isn’t like out of the question for Tool.

                  jtb

                • Kevindust says

                  October 21, 2012 at 8:35 pm

                  Lateralus (the CD) is absolutely perfect just as it is. My biggest (and only) issue with 10,000 Days is that it is in the wrong sequence. It would flow much better if it opened and closed with the orchestral tunes. Start with Wings 1&2 have Vicarious/Jambi/The Pot/Intension/Right In Two in the middle and end with Rosetta Stoned.

                • Kevindust says

                  October 21, 2012 at 8:49 pm

                  6, 7, 5, 8, 4, 9, 13, 1, 12, 2, 11, 3, 10 is a spiral out and in. Parabol Parabola Schism Ticks and Leeches Mantra Lateralus Faaip De Oiad The Grudge Triad Eon Blue Apocalypse Reflection The Patient Disposition. I prefer the original order. Enough of this, it’s time for The Walking Dead

  36. johnthebasket says

    October 20, 2012 at 6:23 am

    I don’t know what this is doing here either, but I do know that life has no edit button. And this here place is some offbrand, twisted version of art imitating life.

    John

    Reply
    • dto says

      October 20, 2012 at 1:23 pm

      And that is exactly why I like bowling. There’s a re-set button. Life has a re-set button. You just need to know when to push it and get a new set-up to take a shot at.

      Reply
      • johnthebasket says

        October 21, 2012 at 7:22 pm

        I liked bowling because I could drink while doing it. Well, not in the actual runup, but between balls, so to speak.

        jtb

        Reply
        • chill says

          October 21, 2012 at 7:29 pm

          A buddy of mine says that the reason he likes to play guitar (as opposed to other instruments) is because you can smoke a cigarette while playing. Personally, I could never figure out guitar. And you *can’t* smoke while playing sax.
          .

          Reply
  37. Alex says

    October 20, 2012 at 9:42 am

    Lack of an edit button keeps you honest.

    Reply
  38. Andy says

    October 20, 2012 at 2:39 pm

    My kids have pretentious first names, I like the names anyway, but I also like the pretentiousness of it.

    Reply
  39. dto says

    October 20, 2012 at 4:33 pm

    I’ve been out on the road for a month and did a lot of projects around the place the past few days while I’m home. Covered the motor home and got ready for winter. Even had a chance to oil the ‘ol Winchester this afternoon. Is that too pretentious?

    Reply
    • johnthebasket says

      October 21, 2012 at 7:01 pm

      I have no idea why my brain bounced to immediately to this…

      Living on the road my friend,
      Was gonna keep you free and clean.
      Now you wear your skin like iron,
      Your breath as hard as kerosene.

      Reply
  40. Adam says

    October 21, 2012 at 11:45 am

    So many pretentious things… Most of them given to me by my company. My airplane and Aston Martin probably rank up at the top… They’re for sale if anyone’s interested!

    As for the Calvin Kliens… It’s worth the price. Try ‘me once and you’ll be sold.

    Reply
    • chill says

      October 21, 2012 at 12:05 pm

      What kind of airplane?
      .

      Reply
      • Adam says

        October 21, 2012 at 4:58 pm

        I have a 6 (was 8 but crashed 2) small Luscombe 11E’s made by Quartz Mountain Aerospace (on par with a Cessna 182) and a Cessna Citation V… Citation’s not for sale yet, though. Probably will be next year.

        Reply
        • chill says

          October 21, 2012 at 6:54 pm

          A Citation is a little out of my league anyway. But it’s just as well you didn’t say “Piper Arrow” or “Mooney 201”.
          .

          Reply
  41. johnthebasket says

    October 21, 2012 at 9:44 pm

    All the Federales say
    They could have had him any day
    They only let him slip away
    Out of kindness, I suppose.

    Reply
    • chill says

      October 21, 2012 at 9:58 pm

      I wish I was in Tijuana
      Eating barbecued iguana
      .

      Reply
  42. hardoxdan says

    October 21, 2012 at 10:35 pm

    My most glaring pretentious object is an 18K gold Rolex President with a diamond bezel. I wear it daily and I feel naked when I don’t have it on.

    Paid $4K for it used about 10 years ago, had it serviced for $800 and it looks brand new although it is a 1982 model. Rolex has not changed the style of this watch since the late 1950’s.

    Full retail is about $27,000 new.

    Reply
  43. chill says

    October 21, 2012 at 11:09 pm

    Q: It’s 11:11 – make a wish!
    A: I wish I had gone to bed two hours ago.
    .

    Reply
  44. The4thStooge says

    October 22, 2012 at 10:08 pm

    The most pretentious thing I have EVER bought were these kick-ass Sennheiser headphones. Retail price: $1100. My price: $400. Yeah, they might have been a little “hot”, but since I bought them from a website that didn’t come up with a whole shitload of sex popups, I didn’t care.Them Sennheiser 650 headphones were the SHIT. And, speaking of shit, they shit the bed over a year (or three) ago, and my dumb ass is still talking about getting them repaired. Part of me thinks it’s stupid, but the other part? Knows that I will never in the near (or far) future to be lucky enough to buy $1,100 headphones to listen to a NAD Series 20 amplifier, a 1976 Technics SJ 2000 turntable, and a Luxman 92 CD player. But damn, when I was on a roll, I was on a ROLL!

    Reply

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