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Zeroing Out the Moleskine, vol. 19

December 13, 2012 By Jeff 46 Comments

moleskineOK, I think we’re back in business again.  Sorry for the half-assed week here, but I’ve been having all sorts of technical difficulties.

For one thing, whenever my home computer goes into sleep or hibernation mode, it won’t come out.  When I move the mouse, or hit a button on the keyboard, there’s a loud revving noise, but the monitor doesn’t wake up.  I did some Google searches, and this is apparently a common issue.

I think it might be fixed now, but it was making me crazy for a couple of days.  I had to turn the machine off, and reboot every time.  Something was radically askew.

Then, yesterday, I was prompted to upgrade the website software to the new WordPress 3.5.  I did so, and immediately started having problems.  I won’t bore you with the details, but some of the plugins I had installed were not playing nicely with the new version of WordPress.  Another few hours of running my hands through my hair…

And this morning I went on there to update the Bunker Cam, and it wouldn’t allow me to add photos.  What the shit, man?!  Their fancy-ass new features were nothing but a prop to me.  I might as well have been left-clicking a squash.

Jan, my Canadian friend who helps with technical “opportunities,” somehow fixed it.  The whole thing is beyond me…  He tried to explain what was happening, but it all just sounded like a grinding noise.  All I know is, so-called improvements will eventually cause me to lose my stomach lining.

On a more positive note, if you ever need help with a WordPress website, Jan is your man.  Send me an email and I’ll give you his contact info.  He has reasonable rates, is trustworthy, and does a fantastic job.  Just let me know.

I woke up this morning with the Fugazi song “Waiting Room” in my head.  I don’t think I’d heard it in ten years or more.  How is something like that possible?  A series of mini-strokes?  I listened to the actual song in my car a little while ago: goddamn kickass.  I saw them once, at the Masquerade in Atlanta.  In case you should give a crap.

You know what I don’t like?  When people call me “sir.”  I had a Nerf football-sized burrito at Moe’s today, and the girl on the other side of the glass kept saying, “Anything else, sir?”  I don’t care for it.  It makes me feel old, like I’m suddenly Mr. Wilson on the Dennis the Menace program.

On the other hand… I don’t really like it when some young person says, “Here ya go, man.”  It’s OK if the person is roughly my age, and adds a “man” to the end of his final sentence.  But not when he was born during the Clinton Administration.  Those people can fuck off.

Yeah, I know it’s close to being a contradiction.  But that’s the way it goes sometimes.

I just went to the middle school to pick up our youngest son from detention (never a dull moment), and went past a restaurant I used to frequent, back in the high-flying record weasel days.  It was a straight-up expense account steakhouse. I don’t think actual people ever bought meals there, just corporations.

Indeed, I ate there many times, and never paid for anything.  And now the whole place is gone.  Not only is the restaurant out of business, but the building has been torn down.  It’s as if that whole part of my life is being erased.  At some point, in the not too distant future, I’ll probably have a hard time believing it ever happened.

Everything is SO different now.  It seems impossible that I used to eat $45 steaks, and drink $10 martinis, on the tab of my employer.  Now I’m carrying a sack lunch, and buying Mountain Dews from a vending machine.  <sigh>

Last Sunday I hooked up the 70s audio equipment that Dr. Drofub gave me for my birthday, and let the kids connect their iPods to it.  They couldn’t believe how great it sounded.  They’re used to little docking station-type stereos, and have never heard the big honkin’ old school wooden speakers.

They loved it so much, in fact, I went to work that afternoon, and haven’t seen the equipment since.  They absconded with my birthday present!  It’s in the older boy’s room, I hear, and don’t understand how he managed it, without pissing off his brother.

In any case, it’s gone.  At least temporarily.  I’d like to play around with it, but my shit was hijacked.  It’ll be reclaimed, though.  Mark my words.

And speaking of birthday presents… wanna guess what Steve gave me?  That’s right, a framed, autographed photo of Elvis Costello – with certificate of authenticity.  How cool is that?  Elvis is one of my favorites, of course, and his signed photo now hangs in its rightful place:  on a wall in the bunker.

I had to take down my signed photo of the Olsen Twins, but will relocate it, ASAP.  It says something like, “Thanks for all your support, Jeff!  Mary-Kate and Ashley.”  Like I say, I’m starting to believe none of that stuff ever happened.  Crazy.

I watched an entertaining movie on Netflix a few nights ago:  God Bless America, written and directed by Bobcat Goldthwait.  It’s similar to Falling Down, and features a middle-aged guy who’s freaking had it with society.  So, he starts killing the people he believes deserve it.  You know, like cable news blowhards and reality show “stars.”  It’s not a perfect movie, but definitely a good time.  I recommend it.

Do you have any Netflix Instant recommendations?  I have about 200 things in my queue, but am not super-jazzed about watching any of them.  What would you suggest?  Please help me out, won’t you?  Most of the stuff on there is so obscure, I don’t know much about it.

I need to go now, but want to remind everyone about the Amazon links again.  If you’re going to be doing some holiday shopping there, please enter their site through one of our links.  Like this one.  It costs you nothing extra, but I get a small percentage of whatever you spend.  It helps a great deal – especially during December.  Please try not to forget.  Toney forgets, and she’s my wife, so I understand how it goes.  But please do your best to remember.  And thank you very much for the support!

I’ll leave you now with a Questionable question.  One of my co-workers just returned from a trip to New Orleans, and she stayed at an ancient inn that was built in the 1700s, or somesuch.  She said that when she sat in the courtyard, she felt transported to a different era.

I love that kind of thing:  little corners of the world where time has somehow not been able to reach.  And I’d like to know about the ones you’ve encountered during your life.  Please use the comments link below.  This one might not go very well, I can’t really predict it.  But if you have anything, please share it with us.

And I’ll be back on Monday, if not sooner.  I have to get crackin’ on this book project, since I only have a few weeks left.  So, that’s what I’ll be doing all day tomorrow.

Have a great weekend, my friends!

Now playing in the bunker
Do your holiday shopping at Amazon: US and Canada

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Comments

  1. Alex says

    December 13, 2012 at 5:39 pm

    Old creaky floor hardware stores with a billion little drawers does it for me.

    Reply
    • hot fuzz says

      December 13, 2012 at 5:57 pm

      and in gold and silver – Canada

      Reply
      • hot fuzz says

        December 13, 2012 at 6:11 pm

        Well I didn’t have a song in my head until you mentioned you had one in yours…

        Today’s earworm…http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GEPOgntWfiE

        …and just once I’d like someone to call me sir without following it with “you’re making a disturbance” D’OH!!!

        I’d like to know who said it was ok to replace “thanks!” with “here you go, bye”?

        Falling down is a scary movie in that I can relate far too easily with the main guy. From “ay-tee fyth thents” to the guy asking for money just made it too lifelike. I once did put my lunch and baseball glove in a briefcase because I needed to bring the case to work to bring some extra papers home. My wife kept laughing at me… she didn’t realize how close I was to falling down.

        There’s a little town called Whitem in England. It had the cobble stones, pubs, inns and was just so perfectly quaint. I loved it because it was so quiet, calm and unrushed. I had to leave really early one morning and the Inn-keeper came down to check me out in a night gown. I wouldn’t have been surprised if he had been wearing a night cap as well.

        Reply
  2. Dogberry says

    December 13, 2012 at 6:12 pm

    I can’t walk into any branch of the Smithsonian without feeling like I am about nine years old again.

    Reply
  3. chill says

    December 13, 2012 at 6:23 pm

    Wow, top ten. I’ll be back.
    .

    Reply
  4. Surly Shawn says

    December 13, 2012 at 6:26 pm

    Wow. Fugazi AND Dennis The Menace references in the same article. I guess I can add that to my list of things I didn’t think were possible.
    (pencil scratching)

    I was fortunate enough to see Fugazi in Tucson and they blew my mind. Long time fan just confirming what he knew – they rock! I also got a soundboard copy of the show on DAT from the sound guy. I can’t remember if he was from the house or the band. Let me know if you want a copy.
    How’s that for feeling old? DAT!

    I am currently fascinated by an Everest show from the Discovery channel. Not sure if it’s on Netflix or not. That and the third season of Archer.

    Reply
  5. chill says

    December 13, 2012 at 6:38 pm

    I know what you mean about “sir”. It doesn’t make me feel old, so much as it’s a very unfriendly form of address. When somebody calls me “sir” it comes off anywhere from cold to confrontational, depending on the circumstances.

    Places that feel like time stood still… old bars with smoke-stained wood paneling. Certain government facilities. Noank, Connecticut.
    .

    Reply
  6. dto says

    December 13, 2012 at 6:45 pm

    See there?…””Running my hands through my hair”. What? Turn fifty and no more whipping? Good thing I guss. Saves on hair and you might through your shoulder out at your age …Sir.

    I used to like Elvis Costello…kinda anyway. Unitl he snagged Diana Krall. Fuck! Him!

    Reply
    • dto says

      December 13, 2012 at 8:26 pm

      THROW…crap!!

      Reply
  7. The Qweezy Mark says

    December 13, 2012 at 7:06 pm

    Time stands still – The Own-Lee Place

    Reply
  8. Stuart says

    December 13, 2012 at 7:24 pm

    Jeff try a movie called “Flypaper” its really offbeat ahd stars Ashley Judd- hubba hubba…oh yeah and Patrick Dempsey – but in a good way. Enjoy

    Reply
  9. ron says

    December 13, 2012 at 8:17 pm

    local store kid used to call me sir.
    i told him that sir made me feel old
    would much rather be called sob, mf, or anything else
    kid was amused
    he about got fired for sayng” have a nice day,pig fuc*er”

    i had to explain to his boss that i prefered that sort of adress to being called sir
    after that he and his boss got creative

    Reply
  10. WV.Hillbilly says

    December 13, 2012 at 8:36 pm

    When I lived on 18th St in Dunbar, the kid next door called me sir. I wasn’t even 25 years old. I told him sir was my dad.

    Reply
  11. al says

    December 13, 2012 at 9:37 pm

    Llittle corners of the world where time has somehow not been able to reach? I’ve got one. Northeastern Pennsylvania. But not in a good way…………. Stuck in the 1950’s with 1950’s bluehairs driving about in Buick Roadmasters and whatnot…

    Reply
    • bikerchick says

      December 14, 2012 at 11:12 am

      al….you just described the whole city of Pittsburgh. It’s a city of neighborhoods….. You must be very nearby! Some neighborhood’s are stuck in their own time zones. And they’re usually right beside a hip and “up and coming” area. But the boundries never cross!

      Reply
  12. Tiff says

    December 13, 2012 at 10:08 pm

    The Noank CT comment is true. Was there this summer and nothing’s changed in the 7+ years since the last time I was there. Same can be said of the CT town I lived in, East Haddam. Good God – even the people haven’t aged.

    There’s a little road in Sandwich, England off of which site the ruins of a Norman church built in the 1200’s or somesuch. It’s literally in someone’s backyard. I took a walk past there one day while killing time waiting for it to be a decent hour to go back to the Bell to start drinking, and I was literally stopped in my tracks by….something. I stared and stared at that wee church, feeling the weight of hundreds of years of living, and astounded by how much had changed in a relatively short time. Wouldn’t have been surprised if a gent in skins and chain maile had emerged from the bushes out back. Would go back!

    Reply
  13. Ed says

    December 13, 2012 at 11:13 pm

    I had wanted to see the new Bobcat Goldthwait movie – glad to here it’s available now. I’d highly recommend his others: World’s Greatest Dad and Sleeping Dogs Lie. (Didn’t like Shakes the Clown too much though).

    Reply
    • Knucklehead says

      December 14, 2012 at 2:45 am

      Ed, try watching Shakes again. I didn’t like it the first time I saw it, either, now it’s one of my faves!

      Reply
      • Ed says

        December 14, 2012 at 6:10 pm

        Thanks for the advice Knuckle, I’ll give Shakes another chance.

        Reply
  14. Jason says

    December 13, 2012 at 11:18 pm

    There’s a hotel in Nashville that I always stay in and it feels like 1910 in there. It’s awesome and over-the-top nice.

    I don’t mind being called “Sir”. But if someone calls me “dude” when I’m doing some kind of transaction with them, I slap them in the face with a fish. I constantly carry around a fish for that very reason.

    Reply
  15. Jed says

    December 13, 2012 at 11:20 pm

    Time stands still the moment you enter any post office in this country. Musty yellowing shitholes, every last one. Even the drop boxes and mail trucks look like they’re one season away from turning into a heap of rust. Its sad.

    Reply
    • bikerchick says

      December 14, 2012 at 11:15 am

      So true.

      Reply
  16. Knucklehead says

    December 14, 2012 at 2:46 am

    I live in a 1000 year old village. I would like to go somewhere that makes me feel like I’m living in the present. This quaint shit gets old once in awhile.

    Reply
    • chill says

      December 14, 2012 at 5:34 am

      Quaint plumbing and quaint wiring get old REALLY fast.
      .

      Reply
      • Knucklehead says

        December 15, 2012 at 3:43 am

        And nothing is more annoying than a quaint internet connection.

        Reply
  17. Lefty McLiberal says

    December 14, 2012 at 7:46 am

    Look at Mr. Fancy! Buying name brand sodas at vending machine prices. Meanwhile guys like me are buying store brand diet colas when they go on sale.

    Reply
    • Uncle Goo says

      December 15, 2012 at 11:40 am

      Aldi’s 12-pack for $2.39! Fake Coke or Dew…

      Reply
  18. Westersteve says

    December 14, 2012 at 7:46 am

    I was at a cheap hotel in Myrtle beach that transported me back to the1970’s with the nicotine tinged walls and big box tv chained to table….does that count?

    Reply
  19. Uncle Buzz in Wheeling says

    December 14, 2012 at 8:56 am

    Jeff, see if you can find a movie called “Bubba Hotep”. Here’s a link http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0281686/

    Another ‘unusual’ selection is “Searching For The Wrong-Eyed Jesus” http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0389361/

    The fact that I’ve watched these two gems should be enough to get me banned from this forum, but never mind. Enjoy!

    Today’s quote: “Education is the path from cocky ignorance to miserable uncertainty.” Mark Twain

    Reply
  20. madz1962 says

    December 14, 2012 at 10:10 am

    Beloved’s boss had his 75th birthday at the Union club in NYC. I think it’s the country’s second oldest club. Talk about going back in time. Back int he day, the Union Club was an all men’s club. When we got there, I had to go to the bathroom and someone pointed to a rickety old elevator and told me downstairs. I got lost and ended up in the bowels of this place and I swear, it felt like I was on the set of “The Shining” Big wooden meat locker doors, creepy coal rooms, bare bulbs hanging in the hallway. Just really old shit. And no rest room.

    Reply
    • bikerchick says

      December 14, 2012 at 11:32 am

      Christ! Sounds like you were on the set of American Horror Story! At least you escaped the wrath of Bloody Face!!

      Reply
  21. boogerP says

    December 14, 2012 at 11:47 am

    Netflix stuff I dug recently

    Knuckle – a documentary about present day nomadic irish guys that have street fights to settle disputes. Takes place in Ireland and yet has that “Wonderful Whites of West Virginia” feel to it… with street fights

    Who is Harry Nilsson – documentary about Harry Nilsson.

    Canadian Series – Todd and the Book of Pure Evil, Trailer Park Boys, Blue Mountian State – Funny, Filthy, awesome wastes of time.

    Survivor Man – tips on how to apocalyvive, with the end being so close and all. (also a canadian series)

    Red State

    Young Adult

    Reply
  22. Max says

    December 14, 2012 at 1:01 pm

    I’ll tell you what, I felt transported back in time standing on the ruins of the Great Wall when I was in Beijing. It was stunning.

    Also, being one of the younger ones here, I address people as “sir” or or “ma’am” out of respect if I don’t know them that well or have never met them. Do you think most “older” people prefer to not be addressed like that nowadays?

    Reply
    • chill says

      December 14, 2012 at 9:22 pm

      Unrestored ruins of medieval castles in Brittany.

      It depends on how much “older” they are, and where they are from, and their background. 40-something or 80-something? Southern or Yankee? Urban or rural? Military or not? Retired plumber, or retired executive? Family?

      As a 50-something non-military Yankee, I’m uncomfortable either using or being called “sir”. But I’m all over “please”, “good morning”, “excuse me” et al. Blame my parents, whatever.
      .

      Reply
      • The Qweezy Mark says

        December 15, 2012 at 10:12 am

        Even at 50, “Man” or “Duuuude” still works for me!

        Reply
  23. Rick in the UK now says

    December 14, 2012 at 1:49 pm

    When I have to make a snap conversation, I’ll revert to what the military drilled into my head, sir or ma’am as required. I can stop it if I have half a second to think, but otherwise default to sir/ma’am.

    Reply
  24. Dave's not here, man says

    December 14, 2012 at 2:16 pm

    Wow, the Fugazi song got me tripping down memory lane. I was a big Minor Threat fan back in high school. We used to sneak into the Underground Railroad in Morganhole, WV to hear them play. Great memories!! I don’t think the Underground Railroad is there anymore, but that would be aplace untouched by time.

    Reply
  25. Dave's not here, man says

    December 14, 2012 at 2:25 pm

    Ah, this is exactly how I remember them. Total chaos on the stage
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k1jSrC-2uaY

    Reply
  26. Seanette says

    December 14, 2012 at 3:21 pm

    I’m a lifelong west coast resident, and have done a fair amount of call center work. Always throws me when someone who is audibly older than I am calls me “ma’am”, since that sounds to me a bit TOO deferential coming from someone I would normally be inclined to treat that politely (both because of age and the customer/worker relationship).

    Reply
  27. Henderson says

    December 14, 2012 at 3:59 pm

    My little place that time forgot is my pubes. I’ve got 70’s bush.

    Reply
    • chill says

      December 14, 2012 at 8:39 pm

      Didn’t need to know that.
      .

      Reply
  28. dto says

    December 14, 2012 at 4:54 pm

    “Please step out of the car sir”
    “Please put down the gun sir”
    “Do you have any drugs on you sir?”
    “Have you been drinking sir”….that’s when ‘sir’ sounds reeaallllly bad and is not an age related form of address. “Sir”, at that point, is just a shorter version of, “You are so fucked right now”. You can hear it in the tone they use.

    I say sir and ma’am. Even to youngn’s. I’ll say, “Thank you young lady”, most times. It just comes out. “Yesum”, to a lady pops out out quite often. Any interaction that I know will last longer than 15 seconds with someone I tell them to call me by my name. I take them off autospeak and we both can get real now.

    Seen Bartleby? Don’t know if it’s streamable or not. Chrispin Glover. Good book too. Kindle it.

    Reply
  29. hot fuzz says

    December 14, 2012 at 7:16 pm

    There used to be a gentleman at work (since laid off) who would call every male sir as part of his very polite way of operating. He would do this for all levels of the organization.

    It’s very contagious and at least a dozen of my colleagues now all use sir in both our emails and voice conversations when working with each other, customers and vendors. It catches some people off guard funny enough.

    Funny how using please, thank you and sir all tend to make things a bit more civil.

    Reply
  30. Uncle Goo says

    December 15, 2012 at 11:52 am

    In 1982 I lived in a boardinghouse in Parkersburg that was stuck around 1945. Had the smell of cooked onions and ramps from the landlady’s kitchen, warm and cold running water, and unvented gas heaters in every room. I think I was the only person living there under 70 years of age. It was midblock between the Belpre, OH bridge and a railroad bridge. Took about a week to get used to the noise and vibration. In 2001 it was torn down and is now a parkinglot next to a church.

    Reply
  31. Dagriff says

    December 15, 2012 at 11:36 pm

    On the netflix que, I’d watch Dear Zachary, all 6 episodes of the BBC’s Sherlock, and Jim Norton’s Please Be Offended

    Reply
  32. Ed says

    December 17, 2012 at 9:23 am

    Dear Zachary is one of the most gut-wrenching things I’ve seen, but highly recommended.

    Reply

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