A few days ago Toney and I were talking about the cable channels we watch. I think we receive roughly six million, but only actually tune in to a handful of them.
I watch Nickelodeon (it’s continuously running at all times), Fox News, NBC (Friday Night Lights only), ABC (LOST only), and that’s about it. In fact, I barely watch TV at all. I see less of it now, than at any time in my life – and have more choices than ever before.
Funny how that works, huh? Back when we had twelve channels (nothing was ever on 1), and were forced to turn a hand-crank to switch from one to another, I logged many daily hours in front of the flickering light. And now that we have 500, or whatever, I rarely watch.
In addition to my “favorites,” Toney only watches two or three additional stations, and the boys are partial to Discovery and the History Channel.
They watch MythBusters, and some show featuring a Brit with a pronounced underbite, who escapes from ridiculous situations. I’ve seen him wearing a jumpsuit of bees, and hanging upside-down with his head inside a clothes hamper full of water (I think).
Whenever he’s not on fire, or nailing his forearm to a porch railing, the dude looks like a cash register with the drawer open. And I find that to be distracting.
The History Channel, as far as I can tell, should have a little Hitler mustache in the bottom right-hand corner of the screen. It should be their logo, because World War II is the only thing they cover. Hasn’t there been other history?
The Secrets also watch a lot of shows with titles such as Air Shows Gone Horribly Wrong, Assholes Under Arrest, and When Shit Flies Apart. But I don’t know who broadcasts those gems.
I’m not exaggerating when I say we watch less than fifteen channels, out of the hundreds we’re paying for. In fact, I can only tell you, without cheating, the channel numbers for Fox News (64), NBC (is it always 3, everywhere in the country?), and possibly ABC (2?). And that’s it. Nickelodeon is never off, so it’s not necessary for me to ever go looking for it… And I don’t watch anything else.
What about you? How many channels can you name by number, off the top of your head?
Occasionally I read where some grandstanding politician suggests a new government regulation, which would force cable providers to allow customers to only pay for the channels they watch.
It would be an a la carte situation, and I don’t know how I feel about it. At first it seems like a good idea. But many channels would instantly disappear, like that weird stuff way up in the 200s, I think, and we’d have a lot less available to us.
And yeah, I know it’s survival of the fittest, and all that. Believe me, I agree. But I also like channel surfing every once in a while, and maybe discovering something freaky and mind-blowing on a channel I’ll never be able to locate again. I don’t take advantage of the choices too often, but I’m glad they’re there. For some reason…
How much TV do you watch? Are you like me, and see less today than at any time in history? What channels do you frequent, and can you name their number off the top of your head?
Any opinions on the a la carte scheme? If it cost $5.00 per month to subscribe to a channel, and you didn’t want to go over $25.00, which ones would you choose? What would be your essential five?
And this is a quickie, typed like a freakin’ email. They’re usually longer, and a little better crafted. But I’m running radically short of time here.
I’ll do better tomorrow, I promise.
See ya then.
Good Afternoon Surf Reporters!!
I pay for about 300 channels on a monthly basis, and when I have the leisure to watch, it’s about 5 channels I tune to.
number 2 sweet Jesus!!!!
Whee!
Espn – background noise
Nbc – 30 rock heroes
Abc – lost
Cartoon network – because I’m 32
Whatever poofer channel the white woman watches.
Top 5 ?
Guess I’ll read now!
NBC is channel 5 in St. Louis, Channel 4 in Nashville TN. I’ve never lived in a place that had a Channel 3.
I was recently thinking if I could just pay for some basic cable channels they would be: Comedy Central, ESPN, Military Channel, Discovery Channel and Cartoon Network (mainly for Adult Swim which you can watch online). Our PBS station is broadcasting the Documentary Channel as part of their over the air digital television signal and I’ve enjoyed that quite a bit.
7?
A very timely topic here. We were just talking about downgrading our service and found that we only watch about 10 channels out of the approximately 1000 we receive, not counting all the various HBOs. As for that, I keep meaning to ditch HBO and they keep stringing me along, one production at a time. For now, it’s Big Love and Flight of the Conchords. Big Love will be on Netflix and Flight of the Conchords is ending soon, so I thought I could pull the plug. Now they’ve added Eastbound and Down which looks funny as hell.
We watch more programming these days, and less actual TV. Thank God for the instant view feature on Netflix!
My mother came to visit recently and watched The Weather Channel during her entire 4 days here. We’d leave the room and when we came back in it would be on the goddamn weather channel (I know it’s 37, it was on so fucking often).
I watch the news now and then (73) and The Office on Thursdays on NBC (5). My wife likes to watch queers, people crying for no apparent reason, things to do with weddings, and midgets.
We have Dish Network and it sucks–1000’s of channels, $90 a month, we watch maybe 9 or 10. A la carte would be WONDERFUL!!!! My top five would be 111 DIY, 23 The WB, 17 NBC, 3 CBS and whatever station is ABC Family. We surf the TV every night and absolutely nothing.
3 Discovery Channels
Vh 1 Rehab!
Speed Channel
ESPN
ESPN 2
ESPN 3
2 1/2 Men
A & E, Intervention & Soprano Reruns
History Channel
The Real Housewives of Orange County only, The Atlanta Housewives and New York Houswives Suck!
top twenty- yahoo
NBC – for The Office only
ABC – for Scrubs only
FOX – Simpsons, Family Guy, American Dad only
Discovery/Discovery Health Channel
HGTV
E – The Soup only
I’d also like to get National Geographic or Science – only for the How It’s Made type of shows.
Off the top of my head…..
2 is CBS
4 is ABC
11 is NBC
13 is PBS
19 is CW
53 is FOX
107 is Comedy Central
114 is E!
118 is A&E
119 is Biography
120 is History
140 is ESPN
151 is Versus
428 FOX Sports News / Pittsburgh
And of those select few I watch maybe 4 or 5. The news at night after work, hockey games(Penguins) on FSN or Versus, and if something catched my interest I’ll watch Biography or A&E.
The wife has, however, got me hooked on Hell’s Kitchen Thursday nights on FOX. Love it when Chef Ramsay goes flat out ballistic on the kitchen staff. Sweet Jeebus is that funny to watch!!
Jason, that means your wife watches TLC (49) or Bravo (39 I think).
I’m a big fan of Dirty Jobs and Deadliest Catch and Mythbusters.
I frequent Discovery (32) and Comedy Central (57). I’m aware of VH1 (33), MTV (16) and Lifetime (18), but don’t watch them unless I need to see some useless realtiy waste like Rock of Love or Celebrity Rehab.
Espn is 21 AND 22?
Discovery Health is 41, but I can’t watch it during meal time…they show some gross shit on there.
NASA is 47, and I only know that because on my old cable 47 was comedy central and that took some time to get used to.
I watch a lot of tv in the winter. I’m single, I live alone, and I hate going out in the cold.
What is this t.v. and channels that you speak of?
catched? catches? caught?…..whatever
Fox “24”
ABC “Lost”
Food, Travel, Fox News Channels backround
The kid has Nick, Toon, Disney and such
My wife loves disaster shows like “When Planes Crash”, “When Trains Derail”, and of course, “When Lots of People Die.” She says she just likes to be ready, in case.
Why do you watch Fox News?
A friend sent me a couple of questions regarding the Wal-Mart game.
1) What is a camel hatch?
2) What is a funking whistle?
Can anyone help me with this?
Oh wait, the game says “camel hack”. Sorry.
I am completely television obsessed. To buy my channels a la carte would require picking up a second job to pay the bill.
I dont know if I can pick a top 5 but I’ll give it a shot:
ABC – Lost
Fox – Prison Break, 24
NBC – 30 Rock
HBO – Big Love, True Blood
VH1 – Celebrity Rehab
So many good shows would go unwatched. It would be too sad.
Sometimes at work, I log onto http://www.tvismypacifier.com , decide which shows I’m going to watch that night, and then program them to record to my DVR remotely from my cell phone. I better go do that now…
I can’t limit myself to five channels, so a la carte might be expensive for me. Aside from NBC, ABC, CBS, Fox, I watch…
PBS for Frontline, Nova, and Masterpiece Theater
CNN and MSNBC for background noise
USA for Burn Notice and In Plain Sight
FX for Damages
TNT for Saving Grace and Trust Me
AMC for Mad Men
Discover for Deadliest Catch
and BBC America for occasional random shit.
My father would come away with the cheapest cable bill ever, given that he only watches CSPAN, Fox News, the Military Channel, the History Channel, and History International. After spending a week with Dad and his TV choices, I wanted to do myself in.
OMG…!! TV!?!? U kidding? That’s my shit. It’s on whether I can hear it or not! I will watch movies I have seen a bazillion times over. As far as I’m concerned The Godfather, parts 1 and 2, could run in a continous loop….as well as Casino, Goodfella’s, and Titanic!! Can’t remember all the channels.. But we only watch a few too. Family Guy is drop dead funny. Military, History, Discovery, and National Geographic Channels the most. I do like American Idol but my boyfriend controls the goddamn remote… He says he doesn’t want to watch a bunch of fag douchers singin for their supper….. So if it’s not exploding/or being blown to smitherines, someone getting FUBAR’d, some redneck bullshit, or crap about inmates in the correctional systems across the country (I call it Jailhouse Rock)….then my choices don’t stand a chance. HA!
I just read my earlier posting and it appears I desperately need to get a life.
ESPN 1 and 2-Gotta have sports
VS.- Red Wings
Fox Sports- Red Wings, Tigers
A&E- First 48
Discovery- Deadliest Catch
Tru- Cops
NBC
ABC
CBS-Letterman
HBO
The Kids Watch
Disney east,west,toon
Nick East, West Toon, Jr
CTN
PBS
Discovery Kids
That’s 22. At five bucks a month that would be $110. I don’t pay that for cable,phone, and internet combined. I say leave it as it is.
Shit I forgot FX and regular Fox. I’ll loose my damn house!
I have 1,076 channels. I wouldn’t give up any of them, except maybe the foreign language ones at the end, although for a really good time, get drunk late at night (or in the middle of the day) and make up your own dialogue. Somehow, though, there never seems to be ANYTHING worth watching during the day on saturday. Some people may suggest finding alternative means of entertainment, like, say, getting up off the couch, taking a shower, letting my skin feel the warmth of natural sunlight… to them I say “pfffft.” or “if you need me, you know where i’ll be. Pass the corn nuts.”
I watch more TV now that I have a 9 to 5 and a really busy spouse them i have in my entire life combined! Top 5-
VH1 (26)- All things Rock of Love and Junky Celebs
E! (54)- Cannot live without The Girls Next Door or Chelsea Lately.
Fox (6)- House, Bones, Family Guy
CBS (7)- CSI; except NY, 2 and a Half Men
NBC (10)-ER, All Law & Order
I would miss Comedy Central, TNT, USA, and TLC but I could probably survive.
I love the a la carte idea. I mean do we really need a SHAMWOW channel?
The ones I watch:
1 – Foxnews
2- ESPN (during football season)
3-Channel 39 Allentown PBS (because they have 4 hours of British comedy on Saturday evenings.
4 – A&E because I like American Justice and Forensic Files
5 – TVland because I need my daily fix of the Andy Griffith Show.
I watch 99% of my TV through a TiVo so I have no idea what the actual channel numbers are. I have no need to know if The Simpsons was broadcast by Fox or FX or the Yellow Cartoon People Channel.
I would need to keep Speed TV, TLC, the channels that broadcast King of the Hill, The Simpsons, House, Criminal Minds.
Just last week dropped HBO.
The rest of it I’ll just download and watch through my TiVo. I often get a better quality picture from stuff I download than I do from Comcrap’s SD channels.
Oh and Fox News? Bloody hell, and yet you sometimes write fairly well. Can’t watch it too often…
When the cable company jacked up their rates and I got tired of fighting with them, I canceled and got myself a handy digital converter box with my government coupon. The picture is actually cable-esque… when it’s not flickering in and out. I do miss a few cable channels, but realized I could watch most of my shows online or get the DVDs in the mail with Blockbuster (I think I’m the only person who uses Blockbuster Total Access instead of Netflix…)
King of the Hill had been canceled. I know one thing, I hate paying 64 dollars a month for cable. Particularly when several of the channels are religious channels.
Oh the joy of living in a Communist Country:) (Canada where strange relatives come from!!) Our own Canadian T.V. is regulated by the State (If we watch to much U.S. T.V. we might go crazy demand privatized medicine & start voting republican!) It’s not that bad ,the Comedy is pretty good excellent news coverage(CBC) & lots of Brit comedy you don’t see Stateside! We get most of the U.S. feeds from Bufallo & Detroit & bizzarely nearly all our H.D. channels are from Seattle so I can watch house or Family guy at midnight because of the time difference! The downside: 200 frickin French channels: “Bonjour Sponge Bob Ca Va?” and the awful habit of slotting in Canadian commercials where the real ones belong: EVEN DURING THE SUPERBOWL AND THAT”S JUST WRONG PEOPLE!!!!!!!
Renee- you are not the only one who uses Blockbuster. I enjoy being able to go to the store and switch out movies for free if i don’t want to wait for snail mail.
I do hate to tell all of you that I get free “classic cable”, up through the movie channels, because I work where i live and send them alot of business. Please don’t hate me!
I don’t have cable so I only get about 5 channels. But now we got one of them new fangled converter boxes so we get 17!
During the week I watch FOX and CBS after 8pm. And occasionally on the weekends we will watch stuff on the PBS Create. Either cooking or home improvement shows. And thats about it.
We don’t watch so much TV now I think because we have the internet to distract us now.
TV is my life so i can pretty much name just about every channel offered from DirecTV, including all the HBO’s, Showtimes, TMC’s, Cinemax’s, Starz…. so needless to say, no a la carte for me. when my 2 year “rebates cuz i’m a new bitch to the satellite family” stop, i’m gonna have to get rid of somethin’ tho, and that’s not a good thing for a woman that joneses for TV like Tyron Biggums for his Red Bull and a crack rock.
as for the “regular channels” in this area,
NBC = 7 – tune in for My Name is Earl, ER, Dateline, Days of our Lives
CBS = 9 – tune in for Two and a Half Men, Bold and the Beautiful, 48 Hours Mystery
ABC = 12 – tune in for Grey’s Anatomy
FOX = 14 – tune in for LOST, Family Guy, American Idol
and i’m sure more will be added to the roster once new shows are added.
now, i could get into the cable shows i watch but i’m afraid i’d crash the site. HGTV is probably my fave.
I use netflix because I can watch movies on the computer. I have The Shawshank Redemption paused in another window right now.
On the plus side I get a massive discount on my cable bill because I work in property management. On the minus side, because I live in Canada I’m forced to subscribe to a minimum of 30% Canadian channels. So I have to pay for a lot of extra stuff I never watch.
26 CBC Newsworld -like Fox news without the right-wing nut-jobs “commentating”
34 Learning Channel -I’m addicted to Little People Big World, mainly because watching dwarfs run is really, really funny (yes, yes, I know…I’m going to hell)
39 Showcase
42 Discovery -Mythbusters, Dirty Jobs, and that crazy fuck Bear Grylls. That guy will eat ANYTHING! He’s like the Jim Rose Circus Side-Show, but with talent.
45 History – Any given time I turn it on there’s a 25% chance they’re playing Patton, Tora! Tora! Tora!, or Midway.
46 Comedy -Simpsons, Robot Chicken, FG, etc
.
47 Peachtree -they show Family Guy a lot
48 Sci Fi -cause a Sci Fi movie beats a chick flick 100% of the time
49 HGTV -I love shows where complete idiots invest their life savings trying to flip a house and lose everything. It makes me all warm and fuzzy inside. I also enjoy shows where clueless amateurs try to do major renovations and end up destroying the place instead.
50 Cartoon Network -Simpsons, FG, American Dad, Futurama
82 Showcase Action -Decent movies most weekends
84 IFC -Awesome movies most of the time.
100 On Demand -I can choose from 1000’s of movies, porn, TV shows etc. Some cost $$$, some are free.
284 Teletoon Retro -Old cartoons UNCENSORED! I was watching Wait Till Your Father Gets Home last night and the crazy neighbor was going off on how he hates Blacks, Hispanics, and Jews just like he did back in ’74 when it first aired.
And that’s about it. All in all I get over 250 channels and I actually watch less than 20.
I spend more time in front of computer now that I am working on my degree again. I usually watch the Military Channel, NGC or Animal Planet for entertainment. HBO for Bill Maher and maybe a movie every now and then. Oh and FOX for Hell’s Kitchen now get the fuck out of here you donkey!!!!
Fox News? WTF? Too “fair and balanced” for me. Didn’t know you traveled in Limbaughland.
Fox entertainment and sports I can — and do– see. Simpsons, Jack Bauer, NFL on Fox, etc.
Tyrosine – everytime I look at the line up for HGTV, it sounds like Queer Eye for the Gay guy.
Oh and “wait til your father gets home” is just Family Guy, American Dad, King of the Hill and The Simpsons all rolled up into one cartoon. God forbid if they ever got wind of the Boondocks.
@Tyrosine – now that damn theme song is playing in head, get it out you stupid donkey…
@ Shiny Rod -They tend to have the fun shows on during the weekend, but it can be hit and miss. I watched a great one last week that featured the line “Don’t blame me! How was I supposed to know it was a load-bearing wall?” followed later by the line “What do you mean we’re $50,000 over budget?!?!”
Ya gotta skip over the fufu crap, especially anything featuring those two “fancy boys” from Scotland, but it can be worth the wait. Think of it like Cops, but featuring people who have the means to obtain a mortgage.
i am the only one who watches the Food Network?
@ Dave -The only one with a Y chromosome at least
Food Network has become my background noise channel.
Showcase.
Discovery.
Fox.
Spike. to round out the 5 for 25.
What I’m not keen on is channels going soft due to their digital offerings. Showcase would fall into that, they don’t seem to broadcast the edgey movies they once did. But, its where TPB hide out, so it stays.
And theres my diatribe about channel format changes… Ie, A&E, TLC, Life, etc. But I’ll save y’all the agony.
No, I’m a straight man and I watch some Food Network shows too. Although a whole bunch of them I cannot stand. Oddly enough I’m currently waiting for some of AB’s chewy cookie dough to finish chilling before I bake it.
Oh, and I forgot The Daily Show (normally first 12 minutes only).
Fox News?! (shaking head in disgust). Jeff, why?
Okay, I watch:
356 – MSNBC – I know, Fox but to the left, but I love watching Olbermann pontificate.
501 – HBO Bil Maher and several defunct shows I loved.
269 – History Channel HD
249 – Comedy Central for the Daily Show/Colbert Nation
265 – A&E HD for Intervention
The ONLY time I tune to FOX is for Cops/America’s Most Wanted on Sat night if I’m home (we call that “White Trash TV” night). Cops is a real self-esteem builder, and I still can’t believe I’ve never seen anyone I know on America’s Most Wanted…
Happy Tuesday, Surfers!