You know what irritates me? When people fact-check jokes. It happens on Twitter all the time. Somebody will post some silliness — clearly just screwing around — and another person will butt in and correct them on some unimportant inaccuracy in their statement.
It happens in the real world, too. A few days ago I made a joke about something that happened “back in the 80s, or whatever” and a person interjected: “Um, I don’t know what 80s you lived through, but that sounds more like the 70s to me.”
Thanks for that, dick. I’m telling a story here, not producing a documentary. And now you’ve ruined the whole rhythm of it, with your smug fact-checking of irrelevant details. Why don’t you get the paint-stirrer of seriousness out of your ass, you humorless fuck?
It’s different when a person is making a joke BASED on an inaccuracy. I’m not really talking about that. I mean people who miss the whole point of the tale, seize on some side detail, and feel compelled to testify about it. Grrr…
In fact, now that I think about it, I don’t like correctors, in general. It doesn’t have to be a joke, it can be anything.
During my life I’ve been subjected to mountains and mountains of preposterous horseshit. I’ve worked with many a straight-up liar, as well as morons and fools of every stripe. Heck, I have relatives who couldn’t tell the truth, even if a gun was pressed to their head; they seem to lie for sport.
But do I argue with them, and call them on the garbage that’s constantly tumbling from their Skoal hole? Of course not. I don’t have the energy, or the interest. I just say something like, “Huh,” and keep moving.
A lot of people can’t let it go, though, and will stand there debating the most inane and senseless “facts” to ever come down the pike. It’s tiresome. What does it matter if some dolt thinks acorns come from maple trees? Of if a person believes Elvis Costello was born at Woodstock? (I’ve been told both.) How is it going to benefit me, if I get into a protracted argument about it? You can’t fix dumbass in 30 minutes, and it’s not my duty to try.
What’s your stance on correctors? I think it’s more of a personality thing, than anything else. Some people just love to debate. That ain’t me, and I find the whole thing exhausting. Is it you? Please tell us about it in the comments.
Also, what’s the most ridiculous “fact” that anyone’s ever told you? Did you get into it with them?
I’ll see you guys again tomorrow.
Have a great day!