So, the rumors proved to be true and Santa “Jiggles” Claus left the Secrets a Playstation 3 as a Christmas present this year.
To be perfectly honest, I’m not real comfortable with a morbidly obese octogenarian in a prison beard stumbling around our house while we’re upstairs sleeping. But, I’d likely be condemned by society if I even DARED question the motives of the great Claus. So I’ll just let it go. Sheesh.
The boys are loving their gift, though. I’ve gotta hand it to the fatass, he knows what he’s doing. The old guy hasn’t lost a step, despite being, what, three hundred years old? Wow! Talk about your iron man. Not even Carl Rappaport can compete with a streak like that.
The boys also received four games to go with the console: Beatles Rock Band, Modern Warfare 2, Ghostbusters, and Bad Company. I don’t know much about any of them, except I keep hearing gunfire, occasionally interrupted by “Yellow Submarine,” or Ray Parker, Jr.
Wonder what John Lennon would think about that? I can foresee a situation where “All You Need Is Love” is “performed” in our family room, followed closely by the oldest Secret thoroughly roasting a Russian guard with a flamethrower, leaving only a pile of ashes and a pair of boots. Love, indeed.
The Playstation connects to the internet wirelessly, so we can also hear other kids trash-talking each other. And nothing says Christmas like a gang of prepubescent boys, in Kansas or wherever, screaming profanity through your TV speakers. They all sound like they’re eleven years old, and have the vocabulary of… oh I don’t know… Redd Foxx?
Good times.
And speaking of connecting to the internet, we can now stream movies and TV shows through Netflix and PS3, directly to our television. It is, perhaps, the coolest thing ever. I watched The Ghost and Mr. Chicken on Christmas night, and it was perfect. It looked like a DVD was playing. The picture quality couldn’t have been better. As far as I could tell, anyway.
I also watched a few episodes of Dexter, and I haven’t been as excited about a television enhancement device, since we first got a DVR — many years ago. It’s fantastic!
So, the Playstation has been quite a hit, with everyone in the family. What was the biggest hit at your house this year? Tell us about it in the comments, won’t you?
I’ve got a bad cold, if you can believe it. A great way to end the year. I could feel it taking-hold yesterday, and by ten o’clock last night I had crystal-clear fluid cascading from my left nose hole. Only the left one, for some reason.
Today my voice is unnaturally low, and I sound like that guy in the Statler Bros., way down on the end. The Sickness is dragging me down, too. My energy level has plunged, and I feel like I should be a Civil Service clerk in South Carolina or Georgia, or somewhere else associated with slowness.
The pressure makes my teeth hurt, as well. Know what I mean? I’m not a fan of any of it…
I hope everyone had a great holiday, and all that good stuff. Please don’t forget the temporary price reduction on our blue/gray Evil Twin shirts, to just twelve bucks. You can order ’em here. They’re a thing of beauty, and will be going back to sixteen dollars on January 1. Now’s your chance to treat yourself, for a change.
And if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go upstairs and enjoy a Magdalena Calzone frozen meal. Today I think I’ll go with the meat loaf, thank you very much.
See you guys tomorrow.
CitizenX: OOOOOHH! Sons of Anarchy! Our favorite! (of course!). I’d DO Jax on the Court House steps in front of my mother! He is hot as fuck. heh heh.
Stephanie: Hope all goes well for you. Sux to be laid up over the holidays. Just like Knuckleheads said…indulge in a little pain killer drink-y poo. Add a splash of cranberry juice to that champagne. That ‘s call a Poinsettia. In the summer we call that drink a Petunia. YUMMY!
Steph – good luck with the surgery. I had an ectopic (tubal) pregnancy and had to have surgery on Dec. 31 1996. I begged them to let me go home that evening, promised I would poop sometime in the near future and they let me leave! I had one small margarita in bed and promptly passed out! At least I wasn’t in pain! 🙂
I got the Lego Millennium Falcon (the big $500 one) which is what I really wanted, and really didn’t think I’d get on account of not being that nice. So I’m happy but not sure where I’m going to find ~30 hours to construct it.
Our 15 month old pumpkin seems most happy with a box of plastic toy fruit, not he ride-on dinosaur or indoor jungle gym… oh well.
TILLY – congrats on the engagement and good on ya for waiting for as long as you want. That’s a luxury that every couple should allow themselves.
Good luck, Stephanie. Give us a yell as soon as you feel up to it.
debra – what did you get for your husband that he hated? just curious.
Limey, sounds like you and the Translucents have a lot in common, with the Lego thing. Hopefully you don’t also rub your weenis in public. 😉
Thanks everyone for the well wishes. I will let you know about the nuptials. Someday……..
I too got my hunny a gift he hated. I bought him some fancy pants (while still manly of course) shoes from Aldo. I am trying to get him out of the work boots. (No they really don’t go with everything!) he HATED them so back to the old drawing board. MAybe Wolverine makes a nice shoe.
Stephanie- good luck and I highly recommend the pain killer- cocktail route. How i got thru a terribly painful dislocated jaw. Of course that is how some of our celebrity friends wind up dead so be careful!
There’s nothing quite as nice as downing an opiate painkiller along with a bottle of wine. The only drawback is that most opiate painkillers these days also contain acetaminophen (Tylenol), which will destroy your liver when combined with alcohol. And, of course, you need to limit yourself to just one pill, lest you drift off into the neverending nap. But give me a Tylenol-free opiate painkiller and a bottle of fine red wine, and life is sweet.
Just got an email from the STATE, stating that they are installing an even more stringent blocker this week so that we cannot go to websites that are NOT of company business. Hopefully, I can find a backdoor into this thing, or I will not be here much. Anyone else have this gestapo like tactic thrown at them lately? How did you get around it? Going here is the best part of my suckass day.
Took back every one of child bride’s gifts that she hated at lunch today. Now have $211.04 in my pocket. Anyone want to go to dinner?
On IPOD right now- “Broken. Beat and Scarred”- Metallica
@Swami Bologna, if I find one of the ~5300 pieces is missing I will scream like a Translucent being rectally cleared with a spoon.
Alice, My husband is a constant drinker, coffee, water, beer, you name it. Our freezer is furked up so we never have ice for good ice drinks. I bought him a portable ice maker.He was like shocked with disbeleif when he opened it. Then I knew I blew it.
disbelief that is
I got a lot of great gift cards to places, a bunch of cool pottery books, and a hand mixer to replace the stand mixer that, after 51 years and three generations, finally shit the bed. The new one will probably be shot within a couple years, but whaddaya gonna do?
Congrats Tilly!
Good luck Stephanie!