Hello, friends. It’s been a long time since I’ve written one of these updates, and I’m hoping it’s just like riding a bicycle or setting warehouse fires. I’m counting on muscle-memory to take over.
I want to thank Virtual Jeff for posting a new Question from his database every day last week at 9:00 a.m. I was otherwise engaged, but it seems like it went reasonably well. What did you guys think? Go ahead and be honest… [VJ] is unplugged and back inside his packing crate in the basement.
My extracurricular project went well, I think. But, of course, it’s not for me to decide. I turned everything in on Friday, and now all I can do is wait. I’m not the most patient person on the continent, but grit my teeth and pretend to be patient I must. I’ll let you know if I get good news. If it’s never mentioned again… you’ll know I was sent back to the drawing board one more time.
Oh well. Whatever it takes. I don’t give up so easily nowadays. I often wish I could have my twenties back, which was a decade of my life wasted on dumbassery and high-impact douche-a-robics. But I was so quick to give up on things back then. First sign of trouble: fukkit. I don’t need that tendency back, thank you very much.
I returned to work last night, and my desk was an absolute wreck. My computer was locked-out with a generic password, which makes me think it was used last week as a time clock — where employees clocked in and out during every shift. All my pens were gone, my two monitors were radically cockeyed, and my desk was covered in something that required a thorough scrub-down with Mr. Clean, or whatever.
I’m very territorial, and don’t like people messing with my shit. So… within seconds of arrival, I was already growling like a dog, and producing a daisy-chain of illogical profanity. Order was restored within a half-hour, though. It looked worse than it was, I guess.
I had 445 emails, which was a pleasant surprise. I was braced for 650. That’s what my inner-sensors told me: 650. I went through them in an hour or so, and sent 99% to the garbage or one of a dozen folders I’ll probably never open. At the end I was left with about 10 messages that required my direct involvement.
And just like that… I was officially back into the swing of things. As if last week had never happened. It made me feel mildly sad.
But while I was away I discovered two things I’m really enjoying, and would like to share them with you guys. I noticed that [VJ] was pretty negative with his questions, so I thought I’d start the new week with something a little less… dark.
I’d like to know what new stuff you’ve discovered in your travels over the past few months, which you’re enjoying. I’ll start with my two, and you guys can take it from there. OK? OK.
The first is a free phone app called Evernote. There are plenty of applications which you can download to your phone, and use to jot down ideas and thoughts that occur to you throughout the day. I had one on my previous phone, but Evernote is roughly a million times cooler than that earlier one.
It looks great, for one thing, and is super-easy to use. And it also uploads your notes to a cloud drive, so you can retrieve them from any computer in the world. It does a lot of other things, too. But the notebook function is fantastic, and I’ve been using it daily.
And it’s completely free. It’s one of the few apps I’ve discovered that is truly useful, and makes my life a little bit better. I enthusiastically recommend Evernote. Check it out, if you’re so inclined.
Also, I’ve been fairly obsessed with an unlikely album. A few weeks ago I downloaded Bible Belt by Diane Birch, after I heard it mentioned by two different music nerds on unrelated podcasts. It sounded interesting and I had a small balance in my eMusic account, so I took a chance on it.
I’m glad I did. It sounds like a singer/songwriter album from the 1970s — like maybe something from Carole King or Carly Simon. Or maybe a female Elton John. The songs are really good, and it’s just a hell of a lot of fun. I’m sure I’m drawn to the nostalgic feel of it; this stuff would’ve been all over AM radio if it had been released in 1973. But it’s not ONLY about nostalgia… the songs and the performances are strong.
So, there you go. Have you discovered anything new that you’d like to share with us? If so, please use the comments link below.
And I’ll be back tomorrow, boys and girls.
Have a great day!
Now playing in the bunker
Treat yourself at Amazon: US and Canada
It’s amazing what people do to your space when you are gone for a while.
One time when I was gone for a while, someone took the keyboard and mouse from my desk.
445 emails. ppppffffffffttttt.
Here’s what you do. ….. Delete ALL of them. If it was important, they will email again.
I downloaded Evernote a while ago, but my iPhone 3G is too old-timey to run it. I also can’t play the new game Draw Something.
So I guess I’ve recently discovered that my phone is old. I’ll be getting an HTC One X soon enough.
Might just be a coincidence, but look at who all died while VJ was on the job… MCA, Goober, and Maurice Sendak.
Just a thought…the next time you leave for a while, wrap your entire area in that yellow crime scene tape and get some talcum powder and dust your monitor and around your desk and mouse. Maybe put some on your coffee mug too. That should keep the intrusive bastards out.
jim britton says
Now that’s an idea!
About 30 years ago, my dad owned a construction company. He kept a shitload of stuff in our oversized 2 car garage including extension ladders, aluminum brake, shingles, insulation, hammers, saws, gas cans, about 100 extension cords, and it was a total wreck.
Shit always turned up missing. Occasionally, my uncle who lived a couple of blocks would borrow something, but always put it back eventually.
We were going on vacation to the beach for a week and my dad told my uncle to stay out of the garage while we were away because my dad was going to sprinkle a light dusting of flour on the floor and see if there were any foot prints in the garage when we returned. He locked the garage door, disabled the electric door opener, and locked the man door on the side of the garage.
When we returned, he discovered that somebody was opening a window on the alley side of the garage and using our garage as party central. There were cigarette butts, condoms, empty beer cans, panties, and foot prints from about 20 different people.
Dad nailed the window shut from the inside and that was the end of that, never did figure out who had been going in there for all that time partying and stealing stuff.
Spray some Liquid Ass all around your space. That should keep your stuff from being tampered with.
Discovered Top Gear (UK). Yeah, I know I’m way behind, but it gives me more than dozen seasons of catch-up time, so I’m cool with that.
Love that show, the US version isn’t as good.
The birds. I love waking up to the sounds of birds chirping. Except maybe for the squaking crows. Those bastards are loud.
The smell of cut grass. And lilacs. What a symphony for the snoot!
A breeze coming through the window at night.
Just had a fantastic weekend. Took Friday off and went for a long, leisurely lunch. Saturday, we had tickets for Yankee stadium. After 6 straight months of pure suckage and sadness, I feel like we’re finally connecting with the living again.
Phil Jett says
Like Dogberry, I also started watching Top Gear (UK). This was after I caught myself watching 3 hours of Meacham Auto Auctions on Velocity. Saw about 40-50 cars I want but maybe two I could afford buy right now.
Where in the hell do all these people get all that money!
Tipsey McChugney says
A friend recommended a “boot camp” class at a place right near my house I didn’t even know existed. I have never worked out so hard in my life. It is the hardest thing I have ever done. Its one of those classes where you either cry or throw up or swear you’ll never do it again. It’s fucking insane. But I would NEVER push myself that hard. And I need it. I’m so glad I found this place. The people who own it are pretty cool. They train female body builders for competition. In fact, the wife is one of the owners and used to compete herself.
Not quite the same thing, but I’m doing Zumba now, and I LOVE IT. Great cardio workout and it’s so much fun. Hey, if I have to jiggle my ass for an hour, I’m going to have fun doing it.
somehow, that doesn’t sound right….
As long as you don’t hear “tuck a buck”…jiggle to your heart’s content!
My son is currently in SEAL training. When he was in HS he did cross-fit .. that is another great program.
currently i am on 8 weeks accumulated vacation
but i not worry about how things will be when i finish my vay k [ my co workers hate that term, so i use it a lot] because then i will be retired
the thing i enjoy most is, every day is a saterday.
get up when i want
do what i want
monday never comes
Damn, I had a hard time coming back to work after 10 days off. I can’t imagine coming back after 8 weeks.
“I’ll be goddamn if ever’ day ain’t a holiday and ever’ meal a feast.”
Chuck in Belpre says
One of my all time favorite lines.
You might like to check out Diane Birch on “Live From Daryl’s House” (Daryl Hall’s webcast).
Yesterday I learned there is an X on the road indicating where JFK was killed.
It’s all I got.
Glad you found evernote! Everyone I know who uses it RAVES about it. I have downloaded it before but just cannot seem to integrate it / change my ways.
Jeff! What? No passive-aggressive notes on your desk indicating “Do Not Touch” ??
I feel a bit let down.
My Welsh is a little rusty, but I think the bottom message says something like, “Fuck with this desk and I will stick a laser pointer so far up your ass that your eyes will shine.”
Tiger Woods commits to play The Greenbrier Classic in July, along with Phil Mickelson, Sergio Garcia, and Tom Watson. Antics will ensue!
Late to the party and my son tells me I’m so “old school” but I finally paid for pandora and am enjoying the inth out of it on my work computer. My stations are: Adult Alt, Neil Yng, The White Stripes, Manchester Orchestra, Today’s Alt, Modest Mouse, Blink 182, The Shins and then John Prine just cause. Doggone but it can read my mind.
Every day will go just fine
As long as you listen to ol’ John Prine
Cars with USB ports: stick in a thumb drive full of mp3s, and the music appears on the stereo. Brilliant.
Had an ingrown toenail cut out today. That was pretty awesome to watch! It’s amazing how much actually comes out and I didn’t feel a thing. Nice.
My guess for your vague purpose…you went to NYC to meet up with your writer/agent/actor type friends to brainstorm and get down on paper, a pilot episode for a sit-com. I hope I’m right about that.
Someting I’m discovering right now…using a gas powered weed wacker is not near as fun as they make it look on TV. I think I’ll just let the stuff dry out a bit and buy a flame thrower. They’re lots more fun I’m sure.
The # 1 thing I’ve found recently that I really really like: the Surf Report!! I’m LOVING it – thanks for existing Jeff!! (if I may call you Jeff)
Amongst the things I’ve been up to is doing a lot of reading on the Kindle that my wife gave me when she upgraded to the Fire. I’ve gone nuts on the free offerings (currently reading “Varney the Vampyre: Or, The Feast of Blood)- including Jeff’s book- “Crossroads Road”. Funny stuff. I plan on getting it again- and paying for it this time. Keep up the good work.