You know what’s hard to deal with? Making plans to have a late breakfast at Waffle House, then getting overruled and ending up at a Chinese restaurant. My central nervous system has a difficult time reconciling ham & cheese omelette-anticipation with the harsh reality of chicken and broccoli. Ya know?
Last night I had a few beers (ahem) and loaded a few more complete catalogs to the Big iPod. I added the Smiths, Nick Drake, Simon & Garfunkel (what of it?), Paul Simon (through Graceland only), AC/DC (through Back in Black only), and the Reivers.
Next up: Paul Westerberg and REM. I have a dilemma with REM because I really like their new album, but thought the previous two (three?) were zzzzzzz. My inner-completist won’t allow me to skip two or three albums in the catalog, and just jump ahead all willy-nilly. That would be both cavalier and irresponsible. Yet I know I’ll never listen to those two (three?) dogs…
What to do?
In case you were wondering, I’m learning to really love the shuffle-play feature of the iPod. Being an album kinda guy, I’d previously scoffed at the mere suggestion of such a thing. But I impulsively engaged it a few days ago, and am now hooked. Jumping from the Buzzcocks to Paul Simon to the Boomtown Rats to Van Halen to the Jam… It’s like the world’s greatest college radio station.
And speaking of St. Paul, a few days ago I mentioned the bizarre new “album” he released as a 44 minute mp3 download, for the enormous price of 49 cents. It was one big file with no separate songs, or even names of songs listed. It was just a data-dump, with little advance warning or accompanying information.
I was highly skeptical; the first few times I played it I thought it was just something he’d cobbled together in his basement while drunk. There was noise between songs, sometimes several tracks were playing at once, and it just sounded like an unfocused artsy-fartsy mess.
But boy was I wrong… The actual tunes on that thing (the ones that play all the way through, and don’t get lopped off by racket), are among the best he’s released since the Replacements broke up. In fact, there’s a feel to it that Westerberg hasn’t been able to recreate since Pleased to Meet Me.
I absolutely love it; it’s one of the best albums of the year. And that’s the good news… The bad news is it’s no longer available; downloads were abruptly halted a few days ago, and nobody really knows why. I have a feeling it has something to do with the Partridge Family cover (“I Think I Love You”) at the end. Somebody somewhere is probably insisting Paul pay fees for downloads of that tune.
And based on past behavior, I doubt Westerberg will ever agree to edit the song from the album. So, it’s probably gone forever, and will become one of those legendary lost records.
In its place is a song called “5:05” which sounds like a pissed-off response to the whole situation.
Never a dull moment.
Forbes magazine recently released a list of America’s ten fastest-dying cities, and I’m proud to announce I’ve lived in two of them. Plus, nearly every company I’ve ever worked for is now defunct! Yes, it’s a proud legacy…
Several people wrote me this morning saying our Ads vs. Reality page was featured on the CBS Early Show. I didn’t see it, and can’t yet find video evidence. If you have anything on it, please let me know. ‘Cause I need closure.
Now I’m going to mow the grass, make a fart-themed video with the Secrets (a long story), go out for a cuppa two tree beers with Toney, prepare one of my world-famous salads, and watch The Wire.
I’ll leave you with a photo that may or may not give you the heebie-jeebies. You can probably guess which camp I fall into…
Surf Reporter Knucklehead recently had cervical spine surgery, and asked her sister to snap a pic of the Smoking Fish alongside the scar – which was repaired with some kind of glue instead of stitches. And while I applaud the action, it gives me a full-body shiver. Sweet sainted mother of Lancelot Link!
Take a look here, if you’re so inclined. It’s fairly dark, and that might not be a bad thing.
I’m glad you’re doing well, Knucklehead. We all hope you make a quick and complete recovery. I hoist a golden elixir in your honor.
And I’ll see you guys on Monday.
Love drug me kicking and screaming to Dunbar says
It’s amazing how once the FDA approves something it is now socially acceptable…I know people who were using superglue in this manner 20 years ago and you would have thought they were about to commit hari kari!!
Waffles and Chinese are bafflingly different.
Add the last few REM albums (which I agree suck ayse), then delete them. Ta-da! You’ve satisfied your OCDemons.
Shiny Rod says
Top five? WTF! and a Saturday update to boot!
Jeff, I am amazed…
Knucklehead – Great scar pic. Now get somewhere, sit down, be still and get healed up. XOXO
Top 5? New format? This is all so strange.
I live pretty close ( <4 miles) to Detroit and I can attest to its dying.
Downtown seems to be doing well, but I’ve been working in areas away from there recently and it’s incredible just how much the neighborhoods have deteriorated.
You may have heard about the Mayors troubles lately. What do you guys think of that?
And I thought Knucklehead’s scar was a lot smaller and cleaner than what I was expecting. I bet it’s invisible in 3 weeks.
After no Friday update I figured it’d be a long weekend…but JK pulls one out of the air along with a twitter telling everyone to boot.
Jeff you should also add the Fleet Foxes to your Big Pod…new group out of Seattle, which would fit right in. I’ve given up REM’s latest and can’t stop listening.
Your Public. says
I’m in this top ten.
The Fleet Foxes are on my various want-lists, Funky. Soon it will be mine.
I mowed the front yard and Half-Shirt was out there, in his half-shirt, the whole time. Never said a word to me, or even gave me a sup? lift of the chin. When I turned off the mower I could hear his wife in the house ripping someone a new asshole.
Man, your Saturday sounds pretty daggone good. I’m torn now between re-refinishing the LR floor and going outdoors and scraping the house in prep for the paint job that necessitated the purchase of 5 gallons of Sherwin Williams’ “Undercool” paint.
Yeah, I got a paint that perfectly describes ME. What of it?
Sigh. Best finish this Sam Adams Summer Lager and get out there before I love all motivation.
I love ALL motivation, until I lose it.
All y’all enjoy your weekends’ remainders, and get well soon Knucklehead! That’s one impressive scar you’ve got working there.
Holy crap, the fact that I’m even near the Top Ten is a miracle.
I have to say that my scar didn’t look that cool ever. I think my neurosurgeon used internal stitches which dissolved over time. I just remember having to take the clear tape (like packing tape) off my neck and being a little freaked. 8 years later I can still see my scar although other people say they can’t.
Like Jorge, I can attest to Detroit’s problems. I fully expected to find it on that list.
Yup. I am a resident of one of Ohio’s numerous entries in the top ten AND yesterday was my last day with a major **enter dying city here** company. Yup…my job is now in the hands of Punit, Raju and/or Hameed. Again…no bitterness here. :-\
Evil Twin's Wife says
Seeing the scar didn’t bother me. After a laparotomy and 2 c-sections, I’m used to seeing stuff like that.
Expecting Waffle House & getting Chinese instead is right up there with being in high school, thinking you’re going to get a blowjob from the girl you’ve been dating, but you wind up doing something else & getting a handjob off a chick from a different school.
“Your comment is awaiting moderation.”
Dude, my comment is already fucking drunk so forget about it.
That scar would be the reason I am apparently going to have to go to a goddamn methadone clinic at some point….Sheesh.
Thanks for posting the pic, Jeff. I’m bored, so you may get some oxycodone induced smoking fish sightings next week. It’s amazing how creative a little opiate will make you.
Thanks for all the well wishes, all – I’m actually feeling pretty good.
Happy Saturday, Surfers!
Ok, so the Westerberg album was titled “49:00” but was timed at 43:55. Now its gone, but the remaining or missing “5:05” is there. Maybe either a joke on his part, or a reaction to some smart-ass pointing out what i just did?
Great Googly Moogly says
I’ve got a 12 inch scar running running from my..well…asscrack to about my thoracic vertebrae. It’s from two separate laminectomy and discectomies. Nasty ones where they lay your back open and start hacking and drilling. It’s particularly gross looking because the sutures didn’t hold and the incision broke open. So it’s wide too. Add to that skin damage due to surgical tape allergies and it’s a fucking gruesome looking mess down there.
@cashoe interesting observation.
I will finally acquire my first iPod (Nano-like Jeffs) !!!
I know it sounds crazy, but Apple-anything has never been a justified purchase. I have an ugly 1gig sd-expandable ilo that lived through a 5 sec submerge in ice water (event covered in the blog) that has sufficed thus far.
$25 from the local pawn shop.
I won the Nano thru a tech podcast I listen to called
You can watch the video unfold of me winning:
(It happens near the 17th minute)
I know there are some fellow geeks that
lurk in here and you should know that this guy
runs a computer shop in Philly
and he gets on ustream M-F 6pm EST
covering the computer fixes he did that day.
It is very informative and he keeps it real.
He also takes Skype calls if YOU need help.
Okay I know this is Jeff’s site and I am
plugging another website.
But Jeff questioned how I know all of this “stuff”
that I throw his way to keep him computing.
This is one tech podcast I recommend.
Pretty soon I will also be blogging about
adding content to my Ipod.
Cannot wait to join the family.
Willie Williams says
The work I just had on done on a disc in my back was done using only a 1.25 inch incision. Two little stitches and a band-aid was all it took to close. A little over two weeks later and it’s back to work for Wilie.
Knucklehead’s incision brings Frankenstein to mind. (though I’m sure it will be almost invisible in no time)
That is an impressive scar and a creative smoking fish display. Kudos.
I think it would be better to have the doctor holding the sign in the midst of surgery, but short of that, the scar is good.
Cool scar pic Knucklehead! I’ve been using superglue for quite a while for various cuts incurred on the road while helping friends tour. Glad you’re just feeling just bored and not in pain.
Dave – I asked the Doc about that, actually. That would be a “no”. Glad to know I’m not the only twisted Surfer, though.
Knucklehead – You actually asked? Too funny. I’m sure you were *shocked, just shocked* when he said No.
Daniel Cosgrove says
You know what’s hard to deal with? Making plans to have an early breakfast at Waffle House, then getting overruled and ending up in Jail. My central nervous system has a difficult time reconciling ham & cheese omelette-anticipation with the harsh reality of prison. Ya know?
That actually happened to me and some friends a few nights ago. We were driving after a party to waffle house at 4 AM, got pulled over, breathalyzed, and spent the next several hours in the drunk tank. So your opening paragraph really struck home. I sent it to all my friends. or at least two of the three that got arrested with me.
I’m on another forum for broken bones (having broken my ankle 2 years ago). You would not believe the photos people post there! Several of them DID get their doctors to take photos during ORIF (open reduction, internal fixation) surgery! You would think the doctors would be afraid of lawsuits or something, but apparently not.
Wow! A Saturday update!
It does sounds like a great weekend, Jeff.
It depresses me that people like the half-shirts are homeowners and I am not. Grr.
Big Bear In OH says
Finally made it back from the outer banks….longest car ride ever with the crew I rode with. I’ve got a nice scar running along my collarbone that matches perfectly with the plate inside where the ribs used to be up there. Knucklehead- Get well soon, and enjoy the painkillers while you can…they eventually run out and then all hell will break loose!
Happy Early Sunday Fellow Surfers!
Good Morning Surf Reporters…………
missed the Saturday update on Saturday, so now it’s a 2 fer 1 update kind of Monday…….
Jeff let’s start a cult following for an old band from Wilkes-Barre back in 1971. Their name was the Buoys and they had a hit single named Timothy. Check it out on Youtube.
I almost never wake up and say, “let’s have Chinese food!” But my wife craves it. I don’t care for Chinese very much because they apparently don’t believe in cheese. I even carried a slice of Kraft in my shirt pocket once, and asked them to melt it over my beef whatever. I barely made it out of there alive.
We go to Waffle House on Christmas morning every year (kind of a tradition). It’s always packed. And I always dick up my order. I get hash browns with everything on them and then I regret it. Every time. Same thing happens with hot wings. We went to Buffalo Hot Wings last night and I ordered two dozen “hot” ones. It seems safe because there’s about 5 or 6 hotter ones down the menu. But don’t be fooled. Those bastards are ignert hot.
Also, the server mentioned a new “chipotle” wing sauce and asked me if I wanted a sample. “Hell yes!” I was expecting a drum stick but when I got back from the bathroom there was a Dixie cup full of sauce sitting on the table. WTF? I tried to act like a man and slammed it down, but then I ruined it by almost barfing. Don’t drink sauce, kids, don’t do it.
I sort of saw the CBS Saturday Show thing…I wasn’t listening, but looked up and saw the breakfast burrito comparison. I remember thinking to myself, damn, that looks like some of Jeff’s work, but never heard any names mentioned. Piss poor work on my part. but I can definitely confirm there was indeed a fast food reality comparison of some sort.
Shiny Rod says
Jason, dip, do not drink. If that wasn’t warning enough, I once tried the Jamaican Hell Fire and thought it was just regular old (Texasa Pete) hot sauce. Didn’t read the part about it being 4X concentrated. My arse burnt for at least a week.
My ass is burning like I sat in a puddle of jalapeno juice. I don’t ever remember this happening before. If not for these latex underwear, I wouldn’t have been able to leave the house. Then again, I got very drunk yesterday – it’s possible I did in fact sit in a puddle of jalapeno juice. There’s a half eaten can of green beans sitting on the toilet tank with a spoon sticking out of it. I have no idea.