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Profiling The Previous Owner Of My New Car! Our Favorite TV Show Spinoffs! A New Podcast Episode!

August 16, 2018 By Jeff 28 Comments

How long am I allowed to call my new car new? I’ve had it for about three months now. It still feels new to me, but I suspect that window is closing. I think I’m weeks or days away from having to transition from “my new car” to “my car.” I’m not sure what the official ruling is on something like that. Do you? Is three months the cut-off? Help me out, won’t you?

Speaking of my new car, the previous owner was apparently named Bryce. While connecting the Bluetooth I’ve seen multiple mentions of “Bryce’s Cruze.” He had everything labeled that way. And as I drive to work, I sometimes attempt to profile this Bryce.

Here’s what I know:

He took great care of the car and didn’t drive it much. The thing is flawless, as far as I can tell. I mean that literally. I haven’t seen even one tiny scratch or stain. It’s perfect. And the mileage was super-low when I bought it. Of course, I’m cranking that up in short order. But ol’ Bryce didn’t drive it much. Wonder how many times he farted in it? I didn’t see that on the Carfax. Maybe I’ll dig that out and check it again.

Also… all his radio presets were still in place. And it’s baffling, my friends. It’s a lot of hip-hop, country, and alternative rock. Also, a shitload of local channels that do not come in for me. So, apparently, Bryce lived in another part of the country. Like I say, the SiriusXM channels are all over the map. There’s jazz, metal, commercial country, hip-hop… It’s hard to get a handle on this gentleman. There is, however, no classic rock. And no Hair Nation, or anything like that. So, that would make me believe that Bryce is a youngster, right?

The only news channel he had in his pre-sets was BBC. What’s that tell us? Maybe that he’s not particularly political since he’s not tapped into MSNBC or Fox News? I think BBC sounds intriguing to a person in the abstract, but I suspect he never really listened to it. It’s on page 5, I think, of his favorites. Far down the list.

And I don’t know if we can read anything into this, but the driver’s seat was pushed up way too far. Was that done during the detailing at the car dealership, or is Bryce a tiny, tiny man? It’s hard to say.

I’m going to keep investigating, and building a profile of this person. I have a feeling the car was driven under a two-year lease, and once the two years were up… he turned it in and I bought it. But I want to know more about Bryce himself. Any input into this will be appreciated. Do any of the clues I mention tell you anything? Help me out, won’t you?

And I saw the graphic above a few days ago, lodged in the colon of the internet somewhere. I have no recollection of Grady having his own show. Do you? It feels like I would’ve been all over that shit. I loved Grady. Maybe it happened during “the dark years,” when I was almost 100% detached from popular culture. Except for music, of course. In any case. I’d like to use Grady as the premise for our Question o’ the Day: What is your all-time favorite TV spinoff? Also, what’s the weirdest and/or most unlikely spinoff? And, if you’re so inclined: What character SHOULD’VE had a spinoff but didn’t? Use the comments section.

Frasier is a common answer to this question, right? It was a great show, for sure, and a spinoff of Cheers. But if you mention it here, please do me a favor and spell it correctly. For some reason, it’s one of the most misspelled names on the internet. It’s often spelled Fraiser. WTF? What is going on? Is close good enough? And why is it so consistently wrong in the exact same way? I don’t understand.

Finally, I posted a new podcast for patrons today. This one has a lot of poop jokes and ass comedy. In other words, one of my finest efforts to date. $4 patrons can listen to it here. And this is the description:

In this one, I talk about a recent conversation I had with my wife about colonoscopies, and how it began on a serious note but quickly degenerated into a litany of amateur butt and poop jokes. I also discuss a traffic ticket our youngest son was issued and my extensive history with traffic cops. This is a good one, I think. I hope you enjoy it!

By the way, this one was a sloppy mess before the production dude got his hands on it. He made it sound nice and smooth. I wish I knew how to do all that stuff. At some perpetually undefined day in the future, I might start trying to learn audio editing. We’ll see. My guy does a great job with it.

And I’m going to call it a day, my friends.

I’m going to cook up some more eggs and toast and go tackle a few more “opportunities” at work. I’m growing weary of all the opportunities if you want to know the truth. But what are you going to do?

Have a great weekend!

I’ll be back on Monday

Now playing in the bunker
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Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Joe T says

    August 16, 2018 at 12:22 pm

    Probably Green Acres, a spin-off of Petticoat Junction. Arnold Ziffel, in my opinion was a genius character creation. It never fails to make me laugh.

    Reply
  2. Jerry in WV says

    August 16, 2018 at 12:22 pm

    Gomer Pyle, U.S.M.C. is the best spinoff of all time. That is all.

    Reply
  3. Ognir says

    August 16, 2018 at 12:31 pm

    Maybe Laverne and Shirley –

    Reply
  4. JCIII says

    August 16, 2018 at 12:38 pm

    Hey JK, if you give me the VIN to the Cruze, I can run it through my system and tell you where the car was originally sold. Just a thought…

    Reply
    • The Qweezy Mark says

      August 16, 2018 at 3:43 pm

      I thought that would be on the Carfax.

      Reply
  5. Miss Q says

    August 16, 2018 at 1:35 pm

    I think of Bryce as a girl’s name, which makes more sense with the seat situation.

    Reply
  6. Miss Q says

    August 16, 2018 at 1:41 pm

    Wasn’t “Chico and the Man” a spin-off of “Sanford and Son”? I liked that show.

    Reply
  7. Doug says

    August 16, 2018 at 2:06 pm

    The Andy Griffith Show was a spin-off of The Danny Thomas Show.

    Reply
    • madz1962 says

      August 16, 2018 at 2:24 pm

      Really? Wow, I never heard of that. Very interesting.

      Reply
      • Doug says

        August 20, 2018 at 2:38 pm

        Allegedly. Not sure if it really qualifies as a spin-off though. From what I heard there was a one-time appearance on an episode of the Danny Thomas Show that generated so much buzz that The Andy Griffith Show was created.

        Reply
  8. madz1962 says

    August 16, 2018 at 2:26 pm

    I would say Frasier. That was some funny stuff. I heard they might revive it. But I’d miss Eddy the dog.

    Reply
    • doodleydumpster says

      August 16, 2018 at 4:08 pm

      Frasier without Martin just makes me sad.

      Reply
  9. johnthebasket says

    August 16, 2018 at 3:20 pm

    Plane crash guy gets a few comments — Aretha should get at least one, since music is occasionally referenced on this site. If I could be as articulate as the Prez I damn well would, but I can’t, so here’s Mr. Obama’s tweet:

    “Aretha helped define the American experience. In her voice, we could feel our history, all of it and in every shade—our power and our pain, our darkness and our light, our quest for redemption and our hard-won respect. May the Queen of Soul rest in eternal peace.”

    Amen, Sir.

    John

    Reply
    • johnthebasket says

      August 16, 2018 at 3:32 pm

      This was nothing like her best song, but it might be as close as America gets to opera. And the woman could dance a little . . .

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WY66elCQkYk

      jtb

      Reply
      • chill says

        August 16, 2018 at 5:41 pm

        Damn. Every time I watch that, it has more dead people.

        Reply
        • johnthebasket says

          August 16, 2018 at 10:57 pm

          Duck Dunn died in 2012 while playing in Japan, but Steve Cropper plays on. Heard him interviewed earlier this year, and he’s as bright and talented and humble as ever.

          jtb

          Reply
    • Michael Narmour says

      August 17, 2018 at 6:53 pm

      One of the best tributes I’ve ever heard. Queen of Soul does not do justice to her impact on not only America but humanity.

      Reply
    • Never_More says

      August 17, 2018 at 8:35 pm

      Yeah, he can articulate when reading a teleprompter of a speech someone wrote for him. Extemporaneous, not so well.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KSOU3-UdbvI

      Reply
      • Wisey in Ttown says

        August 20, 2018 at 1:21 pm

        Boom

        Reply
  10. Wisey in Ttown says

    August 16, 2018 at 5:00 pm

    Badger and Skinny Pete should have got a spin off from Breaking Bad. Better Call Saul is pretty damn good but the adventures of those two clowns would have been epic.

    The weirdest spin off was Enos from the Dukes of Hazzard. He was a little smarter in the spin off.

    Reply
  11. Eugene B. Sims says

    August 16, 2018 at 6:49 pm

    I watched “Grady”. It was terrible. He lived with his daughter and son-in-law. Just horribly unfunny.

    Reply
  12. madz1962 says

    August 16, 2018 at 7:45 pm

    Best scene ever! The filthy apron, the slippers, the back up girls. Come on! Pure queen.

    Reply
    • madz1962 says

      August 17, 2018 at 10:45 am

      Obviously, this was supposed to be under the Blues Brothers video above.

      Reply
  13. Jorge says

    August 17, 2018 at 9:25 am

    Years ago Life magazine did a big spread on “Friends”.

    The show was going strong but the end was in sight. The possibility of a spin off was discussed with the producers and they were quoted as not wanting to do a spin off using Matt Leblanc as Joey because the character was just not that compelling.

    A few short years later there they were, making “Joey” on NBC. I’ve always wondered how that all went down

    Reply
  14. Jorge says

    August 17, 2018 at 9:26 am

    Years ago Life magazine did a big spread on “Friends”.

    The show was going strong but the end was in sight. The possibility of a spin off was discussed with the producers and they were quoted as not wanting to do a spin off using Matt Leblanc as Joey because the character was just not that compelling.

    A few short years later there they were, making “Joey” on NBC. I’ve always wondered how that all went down

    Reply
  15. Ognir says

    August 17, 2018 at 1:03 pm

    I like that show he has now – Man With A Plan.

    Reply
  16. johnthebasket says

    August 18, 2018 at 3:17 am

    Good Lord. I quote a President, who happens to be black, tweeting about a great American singer, who happens to be black, and the “guy” responds with a white supremacist video. What, in Heaven’s name, have we come to? I will not respond.

    John

    Reply
  17. revashanes says

    August 18, 2018 at 6:17 am

    I liked Rhoda. Phyllis was just plain bad.

    Reply

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