Thanks to the kindness of Surf Reporter Brian, Toney, the boys, and I will be attending tonight’s Wilkes-Barre/Scranton Penguins game. The man has connections, many connections, and made arrangements for us to get in for the very agreeable price of nothing. Pretty cool, huh?
I’m looking forward to it. I’m not the world’s biggest hockey fan, but have always been interested in seeing a few games live. I think it’ll be a blast. …Stay tuned for a full report.
And while enjoying another delicious Marlene Colander frozen meal today, I started thinking about the professional sports teams I’ve watched play at their home stadiums. I’ve been to quite a few baseball games, but not much beyond that.
Here’s my current list, not including minor league contests:
Baseball
Cincinnati Reds (Riverfront Stadium)
Philadelphia Phillies (Veterans Stadium)
Pittsburgh Pirates (Three Rivers Stadium)
Atlanta Braves (Fulton County Stadium)
New York Yankees (Yankee Stadium)
Boston Red Sox (Fenway Park)
San Francisco Giants (Candlestick Park)
Los Angeles Dodgers (Dodger Stadium)
Basketball
Atlanta Hawks (The Omni)
Los Angeles Lakers (The Forum)
Football
none
Hockey
none
As you can see, most of the stadiums I’ve visited are now gone, or no longer in use. The two I visited the most, in Cincinnati and Atlanta, have been bulldozed full-on.
I am a relic from a different era.
I’m sure plenty of you have been to more pro sports games than I have. Give us your lists, in the comments section. And if Steve’s reading this, you might want to submit yours in .pdf format. I don’t know if WordPress is equipped to handle the strain of your list. Sweet Jesus.
Toney and I were talking about something a few days ago, and somehow got onto the subject of profane doctors.
I don’t visit doctors very often, because I’m not really a fan. I’m always convinced they’ll want to twist a flashlight into my ass. But two times in my life I’ve encountered cussing medical professionals. Twice, during very limited exposure.
When we lived in California someone suggested an optometrist in Burbank, so I made an appointment. He seemed fairly standard, until he had me in the chair with that big see-thru apparatus pressed against my face.
He started flipping lenses around, and asking if each combination improved my vision or made it worse. Only, that’s not exactly the way he put it.
He’d flick the things for a couple of seconds, then say, “How’s that? Shitty? Is this any better? Did that make it shitty or better? Any better? Shitty? Shitty? Better?….”
It was bizarre. Who talks that way, especially to a person right off the street? I’d never met the man before. I wasn’t offended, of course, it just made me question the professionalism of this so-called doctor. I felt an urge to see his diploma, just to be sure. I had a feeling he might’ve ordered it out of the back of Rolling Stone.
But he turned out to be really good, and took great care of my problematic eyes. That first visit, however, left me scratching my tiny Duke head. Shitty?
Also in California (is a pattern developing?), our second son was born, via C-Section. I was in the room while the procedure took place, standing far enough behind the partition so I wouldn’t have to see anything ripping apart.
There were two docs there and, I kid you not, they made a golf date while extracting our baby. I fought an urge to holler: “Would you guys please focus?! This is kind of a big deal!”
But everything went well, and after Secret 2 joined us, one of the doctors asked if I wanted to cut the umbilical cord. I told him I’d pass, and he said, “Oh, don’t be such a pussy!”
I couldn’t believe it. A pussy?! Does Buck have a brother who’s a doctor in California?? It was all said in a joking way, but I wasn’t exactly buckled-over in laughter.
A nurse pressed some scissors into my hand, and I did cut the cord — against my will. And it felt like I was trying to saw through raw steak. Blecch.
But, pussy? It’s still amazing to me.
Have you had any unusual experiences with doctors? Has anything baffling happened, like with my foul-mouthed eye doctor, or our trash-talking baby-remover? Use the comments section to tell us all about it.
And I’m gonna cut this one a little short (like an umbilical). Both boys are home from school now, and are playing “music” in their rooms. It feels like I’m typing in the middle of a Best Buy store.
But tomorrow I’ll tell you all about our big-time hockey adventure. Should be fun!
See ya then.
1st!
Moderation- What moderation??
No Way!
Hmm?
third, bitchaz!
Tada!
I’ve been working for doctors for 20+ years now in a “Computer Guy” capacity.
I have seen the entire spectrum but the coolest was the doc being led away by FBI agents for insurance fraud while screaming that he had a waiting room full of patients that would die without his help.
He was a podiatrist.
T10 – been a while
I saw the Pittsburgh Pirates play at Forbes Field.
Also, saw the Steelers play at Pitt Stadium.
Ten! Again!
New Orleans Saints (Superdome)
New Orleans Saints (LSU)
Atlanta Falcons (Georgia Dome)
New Orleans Jazz (Superdome)
New Orleans Hornets (New Orleans Arena)
Washington Capitals (MCI Center)
New York Yankees (Yankee stadium)
Boston Red Sox (Fenway)
Baltimore Orioles (Memorial)
Texas Rangers (old stadium)
Texas Rangers (new stadium)
Houston Astros (Minute Maid)
San Francisco Giants (PacBell)
Whew!
Come on 17
I went to a Bucs game at Raymond James Stadium in Tampa once, but got way too drunk beforehand and don’t remember anything except thinking that the field looked way smaller in real life.
Been to a buncha Tampa Bay Lightning games at St Pete Times Forum (and formerly The Ice Palace). I go to see big bloody fights and the possibility of limbs being sliced off by speeding ice skates and then there’s always the potential for a good beheading, but no luck so far… just a few little scraps here and there.
My general practitioner is one of the foulest mouthed (yet coolest) people I’ve ever seen. It seems as though he hasnt changed his style since he graduated med school in the 70’s. He still has the Rollie Fingers style moustache (and a pony tail). You can call him Doc or “John” but DO NOT call him “Dr. Smith”, I swear I think the gates of Hell open up if that happens.
Two Scully Two Tadpole technically I’m top 10 based on bodycount:)
Oh I forgot…
Cincinnati Reds (Riverfront)
Pittsburgh Steelers (3 Rivers)
We walked past Atlanta Fulton County Stadium one time when the Braves were playing. Does that count?
No pro sports events. Fear of being tramped in a stampede.
All the origional 6 Hockey arena’s, But the ultimate was being at the Blue Jay’s ist World Series final game at the Skydome (Even though the U.S. Marines hung the Canadian flag upside down we love you guys anyway!!) I have had the same G.P. for 20 plus years She is not only awesome but a georgeous lady, at my last medical the ole prostate finger was well in place when my cell phone rang. “I dare you to answer & tell them what’s going on” she said with a wicked grin! Is it wrong to be in love with your G.P.?
When we lived in Atlanta, we always had season tickets to the Braves (whatever stadium in the 70s), and then when we moved to Kansas, we had season tickets to the Royals (whatever stadium in the early 80s). I think I saw the Chiefs play once, but again, this was the early 80s and I’ve lost many brain cells since that time. Oh! I did see Adam Ant there, too. Can’t remember the arena, but INXS was the opening act! I actually spoke to Michael Hutchence – their bus was parked in front, but we had no clue who the “guys with accents” were until they were up on stage. Woo hoo!
Cincinnati Reds (Riverfront/Cinergy GABP)
Cincinnati Bengals (Riverfront/Cincergy & Paul Brown) also saw UC play WVU at Riverfront back in the 11-0 ’88 season
Atlanta Braves (Fulton Co) – remember, I was with you !!
Tampa Bay Buccaneers (in the old Sombrero) against Da Bears
Cleveland Cavaliers (in the old shithole they played in)
Lots of NASCAR tracks (Bristol, Martinsville, Richmond, Charlotte, Rockingham, probly more)
MLB
Detroit Tigers (Tiger Stadium)
Cincinnati Reds (Riverfront Stadium & Great American Ballpark)
Chicago Cubs (Wrigley Field)
Chicago White Sox (new Comiskey Field)
Cleveland Indians (Jacobs Field)
Kansas City Royals (Kauffman Stadium)
Seattle Mariners (Safeco Field)
San Diego Padres (PETCO Park)
NFL
Indianapolis Colts (RCA Dome)
NBA
Detroit Pistons (Silver Dome)
Indiana Pacers (Market Square Arena & Conseco Fieldhouse)
NHL
Detroit Red Wings (Joe Louis Arena)
Columbus Blue Jackets (Nationwide Arena)
St. Louis Blues (Scottrade Center)
Dallas Stars (Reunion Arena)
Never heard a doc swear, but once after I had been shooting the breeze with my GP for about 30 minutes (seriously), I told him I thought we should wrap things up so that he could get to the rest of his patients. He responded with a casual “Screw ’em” and then added, “Don’t tell them I said that.” He’s my favorite doc ever.
Mind you, this is the same guy who, the first time I visited his office, winced openly and let out a loud “eewww” upon examining an enormous, painful cyst-like pimple on my neck. (I’m not a baby — It hurt like hell and would NOT go away.) After telling me that the best treatment was simply warm compresses until it “resolved itself”, he got a disgusted look on his face and asked if I wanted a bandage for “that thing”. Please… don’t hold back, doctor.
can’t believe they forced you to cut the cord!
Philadelphia Phillies (Veterans Stadium)
Pittsburgh Pirates (PNC Park)
My former GI doc once said to me, “I biopsied the hell out of it!” while ironically in the act of twisting a flashlight into my ass (well, lit camera, same difference).
I also had a dentist once assure me that “pain elevates one to a higher level.” While he didn’t do the cussing, I sure did.
When I went in to get a vasectomy years ago, the Dr said to me, “You got balls coming in here today!!!”, then he laughed and said it helps relax the patients for whats to “eeehhum” come. My balls were not a bit amused. Slightly numb but not amused.
Hey Jeff have a great time at the game. Hopfuly you’ll get sucked in. Live hockey can do that to people. I can’t wait for the report!
Go Wings!
@oblvios – sure that wasn’t a Botfly?
@Pickles the Clown – Like WWF wrestling and it also lowers your IQ.
Detroit Tigers (Tiger Stadium and Comerica Park)
Detroit Lions (Silver dome and Ford Field)
Red Wings (Joe Louis Arena)
Detroit Pistons (Palace of Auburn Hills)
Saginaw Spirit Hockey (Dow Events Center)
NHL
MN Wild (Xcel center – and played there once myself!)
NY Rangers (MSG)
Blackhawks (United Center)
MN North Stars (Met Center – rest it’s soul)
AHL
Hartford Wolfpack (Old Whalers arena)
MLB
MN Twins (Met Stadium and the Dome)
NY Yankees (Yankee stadium)
Minors
Brooklyn Cyclones (Keyspan Stadium on Coney Island)
NASCAR
Pocono Raceway
Soccer
MN Kicks (Met Stadium)
That’s all I can think of.
@ Shiny – There is some acting in Hockey…but nothing like big time wraslen as I’ve heard.
I think hockey’s definitely my favourite sport to watch live, but hey, I’m a canuckistani.
Hockey
Montreal Canadians (new rink- Bell Center?)
Ottawa Senators (Palladium-Scotiabank whateverthehellitscalled)
Buffalo Sabres (HSBC Center)
Chicago Blackhawks (United Center)
Ottawa 67’s (Junior A team, Civic Center)
I could never afford to see the Leafs, even though I lived a half block from the Gardens when I was 25.
Baseball
Toronto Blue Jays (The Ex, and the Dome)
Football
Buffalo Bills (Wilson Stadium, Orchard Park. Never. Again.)
if the CFL counts, Ottawa Rough Riders (Landsdowne Park)
Basketball
Detroit Pistons (The Palace at Auburn Hills)
Worst crowd I’ve ever been in, and I used to tour with a band, was the Bills fans at a playoff game against Joe Montana & the KC Cheifs. The home team won, and the crowd was still the most miserable, ignorant bunch of load-mouthed drunken retards that I’ve ever come across. I cursed them for all eternity.
Bills superbowl record? 0-4 Co-incidence?
@Alice in WV – Cut the cord? My ex’s OB told me to get in here and catch this damn thing, you put it in there, now you help it come out. Thats the last baby we made together. I think all teenage boys at 13 should have to assist in a birthing. That will put a stop to a whole lot of unwanted prenancies.
Saw The Reds at katz gentlemen’s club in Meridanville, AL. True redheads, I’ll say that for ’em.
@Pickles the Clown – you want to see a good fight just stand in the hallway of any inter-city public school. Your bound to witness some real fighting and it usually involves someones mother.
Damn, forgot Wrigley.
MLB
Cincinnati (Riverfront Stadim/Cinergy Field, Great American BallPark)
Pittsburgh (PNC Park)
Philadelphia (Citizens Bank Park)
Washington D.C. (Nationals Park)
New York (Yankee Stadium, Shea Stadium) Side note Shea was a DUMP!
Detroit (Comerica Park)
Chicago (Wrigley Field)
St. Louis (Old and New Busch Stadium)
Minors
Huntington WV (St Cloud Commons)
Charleston (Watt Powell Park, Appalachian Power Park)
Trenton, NJ (not sure of the name park) 🙂
NBA
None
NHL
Columbus (Nationwide Arena)
ECHL (east coast hockey league)
Huntington, WV (Big Sandy Superstore Arena)
NFL
Pittsburgh (Heniz Field) Preaseason though
College Football
Huntington (Joan C. Edwards Stadium)
Knoxville TN (Neyland Stadium)
Mobile AL (Laad Peebles Stadium)
Gainsville FL (Ben Hill Griffen Stadium)
East Lansing MI (Spartan Stadium)
Detroit (Pontiac Silverdome)
Athens OH (Bobcat stadium)
Clemson SC (Death Valley)
Best sporting event I ever attended – 1980 Miss America Pagent, the swimsuit competition was fierce and the girls were taking no prisoners.
Damn forgot
Nascar
Concord NC (Lowes Speedway)
minor league
Savannah GA (Sand gnats Stadium)
Also I am A Reds Season ticket holder so I am at Great American quite a bit! Its my second home!
Toronto Blue Jays -Exhibition Stadium
Toronto Blue Jays -Skydome
Montreal Expos -The Big O (Olympic Stadium)
Toronto Maple Leafs -Maple Leaf Gardens
26 Major League Ballparks
19 Minor League Ballparks
Next up in June…
Busch Stadium
Modern Woodman Stadium (Daverport, IA)
US Cellular Field
I was new in town, and had my first visit to the eye doctor at the local Wal Mart(!) I was accompanied by my fiancee, and when my name was called, we were both led into the examination room. My fiancee sat in a corner (the room was darkened, so you couldn’t exactly read a magazine in there!) so he sat quietly and listened to my explanations to the doctor, ensuring that I didn’t leave any vital information out (I go in for one thing, then start on a rant about another, and lose my train of thought). Like now.
Anyway…the doctor puts that big eye lens machinery thing up against my face, and proceeds to tell me that I have beautiful lips. WTF??? I am like…”Dude, my fiancee is sitting right in the corner, and he’s going to kick your ass”. I didn’t say anything then…just got really uncomfortable. Then, he tells me he really has a “thing” for redheads. My fiancee was like “Okay, exam OVER”. This guy was beyond creepy, and I always wonder what he would have said (or even done) if I had gone in there alone!
Days later, I received a call at my JOB (where you were NOT allowed to take personal calls) from Mr. Creepy Eye Doctor to tell me that my contact lenses had arrived! (You fill out all info, including work when you first arrive as a new patient) He called back there at least twice, asking to talk with me! (Bosses were NOT pleased. Did they think *I* was???)
Fast forward to a few weeks ago, I was a work recently, (a different job, which is not in a private office, but is a “public” job) when who should come by, but Mr. CED himself!!! He is salivating when he sees me, then asks “Are you still with that fella?” and “You are SO gorgeous”. I could have strangled him with my bare hands, since he was standing there with his 12 year-old son at the time! A real piece of work, this guy…teaching the young ‘un real well…NOT.
Here’s my current list, not including college and minor league contests:
Indy Racing
Indianapolis 500 (Speedway, IN)
Brickyard 400 (Speedway, IN)
Long Beach Grandprix (Long Beach Ca)
Major League Baseball
Detroit Tigers (Tiger Stadium)
Chicago (Wrigley Field)
Cincinnati Reds (Riverfront Stadium)
Houston Astros (Astro Dome)
NFL
Indianapolis Colts (RCA Dome)
NBA
Indiana Pacers (State Fair Grounds and Market Square Arena)
Baseball:
Cincinnati (Riverfront Stadium)
Football:
Washington D.C. (RFK Stadium)
Charlotte (Whatever the hell it’s named know… Bank of America?)
Chapel Hill (Kenan Stadium) – A preseason game with Washington & Atlanta
Hockey:
Greensboro (Coliseum was the temp home for the first two seasons. I was one of the few attendees during those two seasons.)
Basketball:
Nothing
NASCAR racing (it is a major sport):
North Wilkesboro (Davey Allison won)
Charlotte (Jeff Gordon and Bobby Labonte’s first wins stand out from the many times I’ve been there)
Darlington (don’t remember the winner there)
Martinsville (too many winners to remember)
Oh… The NHL team was the Carolina Hurricanes. Sorry.
Doctors:
My mom was a nurse and when I was a kid she worked in the OR of a veteran’s hospital, so I got a LOT of doctor stories. The first that comes to mind happened when I was six. My mom took me in to work on her day off to pick up her paycheque (these being the days before direct deposit). We stopped in the doctor’s lounge to chat and a couple of MDs fresh out of surgery asked if I wanted a coke. I of course said yes, and was directed to the door of the fridge. There was no coke. There were, however, about 10 glass vials each holding a human eyeball, bobbing in preservative, staring back at me. This kinda freaked me out, which gave everyone a good laugh.
I never got my coke.
I saw two Pirates games in Three Rivers Stadium. It was like watching ants from on top of a hill.
I briefly moved back to my hometown after a hurricane in FL in the early nineties. I took my kid to the same family doctor that I had seen growing up for the 30 months we were in PA. I also had said Dr. give me my “yearly exams”–girls you know what I’m talking about. My family doctor from when I was like 3 to the time I was 19 is a heavy smoker and drinks brown liquor on the rocks. How do I know? He was regular at the theme restaurant I was managing. that’s more shocking than swearing to me. Shocking.
I’m thinking . . .
MLB
Dodgers @ Dodgers Stadium (at least I think it’s still called that)
California Angels/Anaheim Angels @ that stadium in Anaheim, CA
Oakland A’s @ McAfee Stadium?(some computer-like company has naming rights)
NFL
LA Raiders @ the Coliseum (preseason)
NHL
LA Kings @ Staples
Ducks @ Arrowhead Pond (now something else)
Dallas Stars @ AA Arena
Phoenix Coyotes @ AmericaWest arena (now somewhere else)
LB Ice Dogs @ LB Arena (now defunct team)
how could I forget . . .
Edmonton Oilers @ Rexall Place
and the outdoor Heritage Game in Edmonton, AB
Oh, instead of NHL as my title, it should just be Hockey since LB Ice Dogs were ECHL.