Over the weekend I decided I needed a fleece jacket. I have a couple nice winter coats, but all my lighter ones have seen better days. My favorite, a green pull-over rain jacket (or somesuch), is starting to fray around the edges. And I can’t have that.
So, we started at Dick’s Sporting Goods, and I was shocked (shocked, I tell ya) by the prices. A plain North Face fleece, nothing special beyond the logo, was eighty bucks. Eighty! And Columbia wasn’t too far behind.
I’m sorry, but that shit is out of the question. What am I, the mayor of Douchetown?
I considered going to Target and just getting a no-name version. Heck, it’s just a torso cozy, who cares about the brand? But Toney convinced me otherwise, and said we should try the mall.
I hate the mall, but begrudgingly agreed. And within minutes I’d found exactly what I was looking for. It was Columbia, fifty-five percent off the original price, and an additional discount if we used our JCPenney credit card.
So I ended up getting a really nice jacket for less than thirty bucks. Original price: seventy(!). And they had all the enormo-sizes, and everything. Pretty cool.
I never consider the mall. I have it in my head there are no deals to be found there, that the prices are jacked-up so retailers can pay enormous rent on their fancy-pants spaces. Plus, as mentioned, I pretty much hate sprawling shopping complexes, and avoid them whenever possible.
I didn’t always feel this way. When I was in my twenties, and earlier, I kinda liked spending time at the mall; an ex-girlfriend and I would often make it our evening destination. And I remember enjoying it.
But something’s happened, either to me or the malls themselves, and I now have no interest whatsoever. On rare occasions when I’m required to visit one, I become almost instantly fatigued by boredom, and shuffle around like a victim of elephantiasis.
There’s just nothing there for me now.
I remember hanging out in bookstores, but they’re all out in the parking lots at this point. And I used to find great cut-out LPs at National Record Mart (including the first three Jam albums, and the original Nuggets). But I don’t even bother visiting mall CD stores these days; the prices make me grimace like Gilbert Gottfried.
And in the early days of the Town Center Mall in Charleston, there was a store called Heaven. They sold retro hipster t-shirts and knickknacks, and had extra-tall candy counters – so you’d feel like a kid standing in front of them. And they stocked Zotz and Razzles, and all manner of stuff I’d almost forgotten about.
So, that was fun. As was the food court. My parents aren’t exactly the adventurous types, and I hadn’t been exposed to many unusual foods. You know, like calzones, and tacos. When the Town Center first opened, their fast food lineup seemed impossibly exotic.
Yes, and I tried them all, with the exception of the Greek place. They had a big slab of shiny gray meat rotating on a giant skewer. The guy (who always had his short sleeves rolled up) would slice off a few slivers, and wrap it up in what looked like a wash cloth. No thank you.
I have no idea what kind of “meat” it was (lamb?), and suspected they just turned off the heat/rotation mechanism at closing time, then back on in the morning. I had no proof of it, but was convinced their enormous quivering meat slab sat there for months on end. Hell, for all I know, they’re still working on the same one, from opening day in 1983.
And there was a pet store, which we used as the world’s worst zoo (Look, a terrier!!), and a Dairy Queen, and a video game arcade, and several other interesting destinations.
But it’s all over now; I have almost literally no interest in what’s being served-up by those places. I like books (no decent bookstores inside malls anymore), music (ha!), electronics (nothing, unless you count Radio Shack — and I don’t), and that’s about it.
I’d rather slam my face into an industrial fan than just wander around aimlessly looking at clothes. I only care about cell phones one weekend every two years, don’t use cologne (call me a radical, but my goal is to smell like nothing), and have little interest in an all-natural apricot/milk buttock-mask.
The food courts don’t even do it for me anymore. I guess I’m one jaded mofo, I don’t know. But they’re all the same, it doesn’t matter what city (or country) you happen to be in. Gristly and suspicious Chinese food (Look, a terrier!), a Subway with even higher prices, a place that offers-up expensive “stuffed pizza,” and all the regular fast food joints, only worse.
The one exception? Chick-fil-A. I still get excited by Chick-fil-A…
But who’s at fault here? Me, or the malls? And what’s your feeling on the subject? Do you still make “the mall” an entertainment destination, like people seemed to do in olden times? What do you get from them? What’s the attraction?
At this point, the only mall I have a burning interest in visiting, is this one. But it has more to do with mass zombie death, than the Pepperidge Farm kiosk.
So, there ya go. Do with this topic what you will…
I’d also like to know how much you guys are paying for gas where you are. I filled up a couple days ago, and paid $2.89 a gallon. Five years ago I would’ve recoiled in horror at that price, but thought it was a freakin’ bargain on Tuesday. What’s it like in yer neck of the woods? Use the comments link below
And I usually don’t update on Fridays, but since I let every one of us down yesterday, I’ll be here. I can’t promise quality, but I will promise words. Tomorrow, I will post more words…
See ya then.
first?
Second!
I HATE MALLS. I got stuck in one with my mother and my sister once, (yes, I’m looking at YOU, Rocco) FOR 8 FULL HOURS. By the time we left, I swear I had a facial tick. The only thing that saved me was my version of the WalMart game: Fashion Police. I gave out imaginary tickets to many, many people that day. If I have to go to a mall, I make it short and sweet. I know what I want, locate it, pay and leave. My husband is more of a shopper than me. I likes me some internets shopping.
Happy Thursday, Surfers!
Top five?? Or ten??
My last fill up was $3.29 last Friday, but prices have been falling like crazy and my usual station is at $3.09 today. (I live in the SF Bay area)
Top 10
Malls just suck… Finally in GA the gas is coming down after our “shortage” and prices over $4 a gallon… this morning the price was $2.46. I am hoping for under $2 by the end of the year, but not counting on it…
I got gas for $2.45 last week with my 10 cent of a gallon Kroger card.
I felt so wealthy afterward that I decided to splurge and super-size my #2 no tomatoes.
$279.9 yesterday in Midland Pa.
Jeff, I believe the Greek food you witnessed being assembled was a gyro. Are they not very popular around there, because I love those things. Done correctly, they are super tasty and, yes, that is lamb. The also usually serve it with a yogurt-based sauce. Sounds positively poofter, but it ain’t. It’s good stuff.
Words Damn it! More words!
$2.64- Wisconsin
Don’t go to Midland PA for gas- holy shit!
Malls Suck.
Did anyone here ever hang out at the St. Albans (WV) mall? It was cool if you were a long haired zit face.
I think that’s the deal with Malls, the less hair and zits you have the less fun they are.
I have nearly no hair and perhaps one zit per year and I hate malls. So I think my theory holds water.
I gotta go with Dan on the spinning gray meat feriner samitches, they kick ass.
We use the Charleston Town Center as a cheap parking spot, then zoom right on through it. If Amazon doesn’t have it, I probably don’t need it.
That “grey meat” is wonderful! I would stab someone for a good gyro right about now. I don’t think it’s for you though, Jeff- garlic, and lots of it.
Paid $2.99/gal here in Chemical Valley, and felt like I was getting over.
Gas is $2.22/gal in Central Texas.
I also hate most malls. Ours is okay because they have many locally owned stores that have real deals, but I pretty much gave up on malls once I had kids because they beg and whine and plead for every shiny object that they see. It just isn’t worth the torment.
I’m with Dogberryjr Amazon is my mall and there’s no hanging around.
I hate my original fairly close by full size mall. The last time I shopped there the local gang fighting escalated into running across the tables in the food court, guns and all–people’s jaws all dropped, forks halfway to mouths. Never going back.
We go to the cut-down version with the half-size JC Penney and Sears only when absolutely necessary–Christmas.
Good Afternoon Surf Reporters!!!!
~~tadpolegal, haha ha . I think SonofSam meant $2.79point9. I know of this station as I am only ten miles from Midland, PA.
The station is a “Kwik Fill” and they always have the lowest prices.
Other than there, everyone else in the area is shelling out $2.89 to $2.85 a gallon.
JK, I’ve been to the Monroeville Mall. It does not smell like zombies anymore.
Malls: I’m with Jeff. As I get older malls have less and less for me. As a douchy teen and twenty-something I would waste entire days there, but not now. Even the food courts suck because I’ve become a food snob and won’t touch most fast food. I have noticed a trend where I live: the malls are dying and being replaced by mega-plazas where a giant parking lot is surrounded by a ring of stores. It’s like being in a mall except you drive instead of walking.
Gas: I’m in Canada so I have no idea how our price compares to yours (I could do some conversions, but why waste the effort). I bought gas on the weekend for $0.949 per liter and that’s the cheapest I’d seen it in over a year. I was paying upwards of $1.30/liter back in the early summer. Two years ago I’d fly into a rage if I had to pay more than $0.8/liter, so it seems strange to be grateful for gas under $1.00. I really shouldn’t bitch since work gives me $350/month to cover my gas, and I never spend more than $120.
I lived near and worked at the largest mall on the east coast as a teen. That will cure anyone of mall enjoyment.
Gas around here is around 2.79.
Gas is only 2.55 here but I live in Atlanta where we didn’t even have gas a month ago.
As for malls; if you get really lucky you can still find malls with old-school cigar shops in them and that’s always good times.
I do remember being a kid though and the mall was always the coolest place during Christmas.
Jeff buddy, Best of Crete and it is still there in the same place (25 years now). I’ve never eaten anything from there but they must be doing business because they are the only holdover from 1983 in that place. My buddy here at work is good friends with the guy with the rolled up sleeves and yes there is still a post-mortem piece of gray meat spinning ’round on a rottiserie.
I forgot:
Gas here in SF is currently a the low, low price of $3.59. If ya shop, you can find it for $3.35, but – that takes more gas!
In a few years when you start looking for another torso cozy (I love that) try Campmore.com. They’ve got good stuff and it’s ridiculously cheap.
It kills me, really kills me, every time you talk about food. Your palate must be shriveled up like a garden slug in a Morton’s plant. Seriously, there’s so much more to food than just meat and potatoes. There are flavors other than salt. Really, there are.
Gyro meat is generally lamb. The sauce is called tsziki (lots of spellings) and is yougurt based (you drain the yogurt first) and then add dill and lemon juice, garlic, and diced cucumbers.
Middle Eastern restaurants have something similar called schwarma. They usually use lamb or chicken and cook it the same way. It’s served “chipped” instead of sliced. And they have a super potent garlic sauce that totally rocks.
Garlic is the real spice of life. Variety comes in second. What is it about garlic that you despise? You’ve mentioned stickiness, but garlic is only sticky when you chop it. Have you considered garlic powder? It’s no stickier than baby powder. And if you give it some time to rehydrate the flavor is pretty good. Problem solved.
For the love of God man, live a little. Try some stuff that you haven’t. There’s a good chance you might like it. The next time you plan a “Big” vacation try and pick the one country on earth not known for the blandness of their cuisine.
Crap. I didn’t mean to get up on the soapbox and yet here I am. What just happed?
Malls are like dance clubs. Sooner or later you realize that they’re too loud and you’d rather sit somewhere quiet and have a conversation.
And gas here is about $2.65 cash and $2.75 credit.
Finally, what’s with the male nudity on the bunker cam? How about some naked women once in a while?
The best thing about malls in the old days was the Hot Dog on a Stick. Young girls in shorts…mashing the lemonade by hand…heaven. If you had one at your mall, you know what I’m talkin’ about.
As for the Bunker cam…NO WEINERS EVER AGAIN.
Is Canadian food notoriously bland? You learn something every day…
$2.79, just south of Bumfuck, PA.
Malls are the suxxors. I sneak in occasionally to get a video game, but I can go in the back entrance and be in and out in 10 minutes.
At least there is a daiquiri shop (drive-through!!) in the mall parking lot to help ease the pain.
I paid 2.89/gallon in Louisiana this morning but there are places at 2.69 and cheaper ’round these parts.
It’s $2.54 here in Gainesville (Georgia, not Florida)
$2.65 a gallon here in Central Illinois
Here’s a mall for you http://www.westedmall.com/home/default.asp
just don’t let Eninen know you’re in Canada. The equivalent of 48 city blocks, over 100 eating establishments, an indoor water park, ice skating, you name it. I think you can even shop there…..
I don’t care for the mall, either, but then my favorite store is Home Depot. My husband doesn’t mind, either. 🙂
filled up this morning for $3.01 a gallon, Santa Fe, New Mexico
Gas is about 2.29 a gallon here. Thats really low even for us and we usually run the lowest in the nation.
I don’t go to the mall. Ever.
I loked them when I was 14. I am well over that now.
Gas here in the midwest (Missouri) is 2.64. what a steal!!!
My husband and I went to the mall the other day to see a movie and while we were waiting we walked around aimlessly. Neither of us had been in a mall in several years. Half the stores were closed but we went into sears and found some “big man” cargo shorts marked down to 99 cents. I wanted to buy them all and open a shorts store. It was truly amazing and we both left the store with a bargain based afterglow.
Believe it or not….gas is $2.06 in Portland, TX
Gas is about $2.99/gallon here in St. Albans, WV. The Evil Twin knows the family who owns Best of Crete and those are gyro sandwiches. Many times, the meat is lamb, but often it’s a lamb/beef mix and they are super tasty (as is everything I’ve ever eaten from there – and that’s been a bunch of times). I rarely visit the mall (either Chas or Htown) anymore. At the Charleston one, it creeps me out to be in that parking garage by myself, trying to load up a 2yr old, her stroller, other purchases, while I don’t know if there’s a perv hiding behind a support brace. Besides, wasn’t that place supposed to spontaneously combust shortly after opening day?? LOL.
Seriously, Jeff – try a Gyro sandwich. If you truly hate it, I will refund your money. If nothing else, get some baklava to go!
Oh…”outdoor” malls are growing in popularity in Texas. Guess we just love having to walk outside between stores in 100+ temperatures.
http://retailtrafficmag.com/mag/la%20cantera%20web.jpg
Today fuel is sitting at 99.3c/L (or $2.99US/gallon).
Malls lose their favoritism as you get older. You even touch on it today: When you where in your 20’s you liked going there with your girlfriend. Its a social destination when your still young which is why it seems like a cool place to go.
$2.21/gal. at the Valero’s here in Central Texas
As for the mall, I used to LOVE it…Corn Dog 7, Country Faire (they sold great lemonade and flavored popcon), there was an arcade that all the “cool kids” hung out and 2 movie theaters….then came Retail Giants and Brand Names…such a shame. I would have loved for my son to have that experience …
Gasoline is $2.64 a gallon here in Huntsville, AL. Except for at Texaco – they always seem to be radically higher than everyone else ($.20 higher, sometimes more).
There’s a new outdoor mall that we walk around sometimes. It’s surrounded by a lake and they have paddle boats, gondola rides, a carousel, and so on. And there’s decent resturants there.
I don’t do the indoor malls anymore. My eyes always seem to burn when I’m in one of those places. And shopping with my wife is terrible. She likes to wander around and carry things for a while, then put them back. Drives me nuts. I always end up outside the dressing room with her purse. And I feel like we’re robbing a bank or something, “YES! That’s it! Take it, take it! Let’s get the hell outta here!”
Here in the north Raleigh area, where gas is still 2.79 a gallon. Yay gas taxes! I’m betting that souf of town it’s going for at least 10 cents less a gallon. Always does.
Malls make me dizzy. Every single one of them. All those people breathing my air….jibblies!
A good place to find gas prices is
http://www.gasbuddy.com/gb_gastemperaturemap.aspx
$2.54 here in Lex-vegas, KY.
Anybody remember when malls would install those animatronic Chrismats display throughout for the Holidays? Malls were awesome then, now they’re just bait for schoolgirls with credit cards.
I meet all my friends at the mall. It’s basically our central meeting up point. We talk about our day. They bitch about school and teachers that they hate and which boy they have a crush on, etc.. I find it very appealing and fun. Of course sometimes I get some looks because I’m 32 and a good 16 years older than them, but hey, a guy’s gotta have a place to go.
Here’s a good site to find national gas prices:
http://www.gasbuddy.com/gb_gastemperaturemap.aspx
Here in central Ohio, gas was $2.37 per gallon for regular. I used my Kroger card and got $.20 per gallon off yesterday, so only $2.17! I can’t remember the last time that gas was that low.
Malls suck.
I’m here in Huntsville too, Jason. Madison Square mall was the place to go back in the day, but now it’s scary. Hoodlum kids running around, you won’t catch me in there after dark without a police escort…heck, you won’t catch me in there period. Parkway is better if I absolutely HAVE to go to a mall.
Bridge street is cool if money is no object. That sh*t is expensive.
I used to enjoy shopping muchmore when I was younger, now I just want to buy my new shoes and get the hell out.
KYDave – I remember those. A guy down the road from us in Texas bought a bunch of those things from an old mall. He’d do his house up like Clark Griswald every year after Thanksgiving. He had all the deer and a giant Santa.
Gas in town is 2.59 and I got .20 more off with my frequent shopper card! I wanted to jump up and down with joy for getting gas for 2.39. A town 30 miles away has gas for 2.35!!
I hate malls. I use to like them but not any more. My kids get all excited when we do go. “Can we go to the pet store? Pleeeeeeese?”
Lew in Bama,
Last time I went to Parkway place it was during the “Christmas during July” thing. Remember that? The radio played Christmas songs all day. And they had “snow” at the mall (shredded plastic being blown down from the second floor). They do make the kids leave at a certain time if they’re unescorted by an adult. I think that probably helps.