Over the weekend I decided I needed a fleece jacket. I have a couple nice winter coats, but all my lighter ones have seen better days. My favorite, a green pull-over rain jacket (or somesuch), is starting to fray around the edges. And I can’t have that.
So, we started at Dick’s Sporting Goods, and I was shocked (shocked, I tell ya) by the prices. A plain North Face fleece, nothing special beyond the logo, was eighty bucks. Eighty! And Columbia wasn’t too far behind.
I’m sorry, but that shit is out of the question. What am I, the mayor of Douchetown?
I considered going to Target and just getting a no-name version. Heck, it’s just a torso cozy, who cares about the brand? But Toney convinced me otherwise, and said we should try the mall.
I hate the mall, but begrudgingly agreed. And within minutes I’d found exactly what I was looking for. It was Columbia, fifty-five percent off the original price, and an additional discount if we used our JCPenney credit card.
So I ended up getting a really nice jacket for less than thirty bucks. Original price: seventy(!). And they had all the enormo-sizes, and everything. Pretty cool.
I never consider the mall. I have it in my head there are no deals to be found there, that the prices are jacked-up so retailers can pay enormous rent on their fancy-pants spaces. Plus, as mentioned, I pretty much hate sprawling shopping complexes, and avoid them whenever possible.
I didn’t always feel this way. When I was in my twenties, and earlier, I kinda liked spending time at the mall; an ex-girlfriend and I would often make it our evening destination. And I remember enjoying it.
But something’s happened, either to me or the malls themselves, and I now have no interest whatsoever. On rare occasions when I’m required to visit one, I become almost instantly fatigued by boredom, and shuffle around like a victim of elephantiasis.
There’s just nothing there for me now.
I remember hanging out in bookstores, but they’re all out in the parking lots at this point. And I used to find great cut-out LPs at National Record Mart (including the first three Jam albums, and the original Nuggets). But I don’t even bother visiting mall CD stores these days; the prices make me grimace like Gilbert Gottfried.
And in the early days of the Town Center Mall in Charleston, there was a store called Heaven. They sold retro hipster t-shirts and knickknacks, and had extra-tall candy counters – so you’d feel like a kid standing in front of them. And they stocked Zotz and Razzles, and all manner of stuff I’d almost forgotten about.
So, that was fun. As was the food court. My parents aren’t exactly the adventurous types, and I hadn’t been exposed to many unusual foods. You know, like calzones, and tacos. When the Town Center first opened, their fast food lineup seemed impossibly exotic.
Yes, and I tried them all, with the exception of the Greek place. They had a big slab of shiny gray meat rotating on a giant skewer. The guy (who always had his short sleeves rolled up) would slice off a few slivers, and wrap it up in what looked like a wash cloth. No thank you.
I have no idea what kind of “meat” it was (lamb?), and suspected they just turned off the heat/rotation mechanism at closing time, then back on in the morning. I had no proof of it, but was convinced their enormous quivering meat slab sat there for months on end. Hell, for all I know, they’re still working on the same one, from opening day in 1983.
And there was a pet store, which we used as the world’s worst zoo (Look, a terrier!!), and a Dairy Queen, and a video game arcade, and several other interesting destinations.
But it’s all over now; I have almost literally no interest in what’s being served-up by those places. I like books (no decent bookstores inside malls anymore), music (ha!), electronics (nothing, unless you count Radio Shack — and I don’t), and that’s about it.
I’d rather slam my face into an industrial fan than just wander around aimlessly looking at clothes. I only care about cell phones one weekend every two years, don’t use cologne (call me a radical, but my goal is to smell like nothing), and have little interest in an all-natural apricot/milk buttock-mask.
The food courts don’t even do it for me anymore. I guess I’m one jaded mofo, I don’t know. But they’re all the same, it doesn’t matter what city (or country) you happen to be in. Gristly and suspicious Chinese food (Look, a terrier!), a Subway with even higher prices, a place that offers-up expensive “stuffed pizza,” and all the regular fast food joints, only worse.
The one exception? Chick-fil-A. I still get excited by Chick-fil-A…
But who’s at fault here? Me, or the malls? And what’s your feeling on the subject? Do you still make “the mall” an entertainment destination, like people seemed to do in olden times? What do you get from them? What’s the attraction?
At this point, the only mall I have a burning interest in visiting, is this one. But it has more to do with mass zombie death, than the Pepperidge Farm kiosk.
So, there ya go. Do with this topic what you will…
I’d also like to know how much you guys are paying for gas where you are. I filled up a couple days ago, and paid $2.89 a gallon. Five years ago I would’ve recoiled in horror at that price, but thought it was a freakin’ bargain on Tuesday. What’s it like in yer neck of the woods? Use the comments link below
And I usually don’t update on Fridays, but since I let every one of us down yesterday, I’ll be here. I can’t promise quality, but I will promise words. Tomorrow, I will post more words…
See ya then.
Triangle Towne Center in Raleigh (our newest mall) just imposed the kiddie curfew after 200+ teens decided to start fighting. All teens must be escorted by an adult now to shop in the mall.
tiff – I paid 2.39 this weekend, but I also buy my gas at Costco. I see it’s at 2.79 today, thats a big jump.
Jeff, I can’t believe you have never tried a Gyro. You are a basket case dude.
Never had a Gyro? Get outta here. I’m a big fan of carnival foods, and that’s one of my favorites. There was once a very wise man who said, “Most of the World’s greatest foods are gray (or grey).”
My wife has mastered many carnival foods. She makes a mean funnel cake and does great with those honey roasted nuts. But a great Gyro eludes her. And it’s ruining our marriage, to tell you the truth. I think you might have to know somebody to get your hands on one of the gray balls. And we know almost nobody.
Jeff, rather than join the chorus of SurfReporters bagging on you for your narrow palate, I’ll suggest that you find Anthony Bourdain (“No Reservations”) on The Travel Channel and see how the rest of the world eats. Maybe it’ll broaden your horizons. If nothing else, you’ll get a chuckle or two.
And I think the mall repulsion is a factor of age. But it’ll come back as a hot spot. Think “mall walkers”.
Gas is $3.23 here in OC. Of course, some of us were dumbasses and bought cars that take the 89 proof stuff. That’s $3.33.
2.45 in Toledo.
Gas is 2.39 here in the Hoosier state before 10 cent shoppers discount.
I wish I could get me one of those Gyro hunks of meat for home. Hell, I wouldn’t mind an Arby’s beef hunk either. Wonder if they sell that in large format for the home?
We pay about $1.40 to $1.50 per Litre here in Brisbane, Australia for regular unleaded petrol. And 1 litre = 0.264172052 US gallons according to google. So i guess that would make it about $5.30 US a gallon. Ouch, and you think you guys got it bad? 😛
Melbourne and Sydney are much worse, and as soon as you go into the outback, expect to pay triple at least.
Gas my Seattle suburb is $2,89/gallon.
2.84 / 2.94 / 3.04 is the lineup here in central Florida. It’s been dropping each week, so I try not to get too much at a time.
Malls are pretty much people-watching tours for me now. Every once in a while I find great deals at a big department store, so I’ll stock up. Otherwise, I hit Kohls, Ross or the like. Same stuff at drastically discounted prices.
But I do miss the York Steak House from my old mall in Maine from when I was a kid. You ever go to one of those? They ruled! But they closed in the late 1980s.
Dude – I can’t believe you didn’t get one of those gyros while you were in London. The Greeks that migrated norf have those stands set up about every kilometer throughout mainland Europe and the Isles! Gyros are like fast food for Europeans that still can’t make their way into a McDonalds.
Still $4.06 here in Okinawa. And yes that’s the “on base” price. Stupid AAFES!!!
Gas is free here on my sofa (well, no more than the price of some of that scrumptious Tsziki sauce).
$2.399 a gallon today at Wa-Wa’s in Richmond, VA – I was so excited that I texted the price to Lester!
Just came home from 3 hours at the mall – Short Pump Town Center. Walked about 55 miles – exhausted and only found 2 items we were looking for.
Lester hates shopping so much that I do it all for him – including shoes. I buy 3 pairs, haul ’em home, he tries them on and I return the other two.
Lester likes for me to give him URLs for items on my Christmas wish list!
I paid $2.89 today on South Saunders Street in Raleigh. That’s the lowest I’ve seen.
Jeff, don’t you eat at Tidewater Grill at the Town Center Mall when you are in Chas?
2.53 today at the Speedway, 2.38 at the Sam’s Club here in Mansfield, OH.
Jeff, I can’t believe you’re anti-gyro…that’s just sad. Coming from a Greek family, I’ve actually had the homemade gyro which is ten times better than the restaurant stuff, but a thousand times easier to screw up, as well.
And malls suck. Especially now that they took out all the good food places to replace them with a Chuck E Cheese and another Chinese place.
Here in Eastern NC (between Raleigh and “Fayette-Nam”), gas prices average between $2.79/gallon and $3.09/gallon. It depends on the store, the brand, and the proximity to the highway.
I am not a fan of the mall. I make a list, divide and conquer. Sadly, I am mum to a girly-girl…and wife of a browser. I often send them without me.
Etters, PA checking in at $2.75 per gallon.
$2.44 South Carolina
paid $2.44 yesterday – South Carolina
Just topped off the tank for $2.39/gal.
I heart gyros. Scrumptious!
I’d kill everyone in this room for just one bite of a tasty Gyro right now. And I think it’s pronounced “Euro”, just like the Communist money. Just so you know.
All of yall – dead – just one bite. I’ve been waiting for a while. Looks like yall will live to see another day.
The wind is blowing like hell up here. My neighbor had a maple hit the ground a little bit ago. What is this, a hurricane? God.
$2.65 here in Gainesville FL not GA.
I dont like malls never did, BUT I Love King of Prussia mall. I dont know why.
OnaWho – Please explain the “King of Prussia”. Is it in Florida? And do you like Gyros? Tell the truth, please. Sorry, I don’t wanna be an ass. But I’m interested.
I don’t know why either, Onawho. ;o) That’s the mall where I worked. Doesn’t matter, the entire thing is built on unstable ground anyway. Sooner or later it’s going to fall into a sinkhole, along with the rest of KofP.
My wife shops for me. I know that’ll piss you off, some of you. I don’t mean to piss you off. But the last shoes were squared toed. Like a goddamn German. And she’s a German. So I wear them. But really, I like them to be “wing tipped” or something along those lines. I’m crazy Conserative when it comes to my shoes. I have crazy small feet. Not my fault. So, they’re gonna look like 1940. That’s what I like. Sorry, sugartits.
JR – you drove off without paying – your gas was “free”
Here petrol has dropped from around £1.15 down to £0.99p per litre in most parts of the country. Converting that to US makes it $6.70 a gallon – well over $8 a gallon before the drop and currency moves. You think you have it bad Josh?
When I was working in Atlanta last year I noticed that Gyros were becoming popular. Strange name. Here we have Donner Kebabs. Same meat but stuffed inside a Pitta (not the same thing as a US Pitta) with salad and chilli sauce. That or a curry rounds off many Brits night in a pub.
Gas in Carlisle, Pa is down to $2.29.
Did yall know that Billy Mays sells health care now?
OnaWho, Gretchen – I know the place well (Kof P). Do you remember Korvettes? I was just a just a little squirm but remember it well.
mudpup: I spent 25 years of my life in KofP and yet Korvettes not ringing a bell. Crap. Can you be more specific? Where was it? What was it’s function?
$2.63 here in Saginaw, MI.
Jason – that “Euro” pronunciation is an American bastardization of the actual Greek. The Greeks pronounce it “gey – rose”.
Euros are the money we spend to buy them here in Germany.
Gretchen, it was a dept store in the mall, they may have closed in the early 80’s. It was a neat store for a kid, had good toy dept. how about the purple cow? also in the mall they had awesome milkshakes.
2.19 in Wichita Kansas.
mudpup: I might have been there in my youth in the 70s/early 80s. Can’t remember it, though.
When my former husband and I first got together we’d smoke….uuhhh…..smoke and just sit on a bench in the mall and people watch. People are fascinating.
I saw $2.49/gallon in Cincinnati last weekend and it was falling fast. $2.88 or so here in Morgantown, but I haven’t checked in five hours.
a while back someone posted an address to free streaming movies for Juno. Does anyone remember the name of that website?