OK, I think I’m officially burned-out on the steamed vegetables for lunch routine. About an hour ago I found myself struggling through a huge bowl of Brussels sprouts and broccoli, not enjoying it in the least. Then, a little while later, my ass went off like a t-shirt cannon; it’s a wonder I didn’t blow the walls out of our upstairs toilet. Good god. Homeland Security is probably en transit as I type.
Clearly, I overdid it with the veggies, and need to ease back on it for a while. I’m bad about getting hung up on things, and taking them too far. Oh well. Maybe I’ll go on a hot dog jag now, and get deeply involved with unusual toppings, or something? Hey, a person needs a hobby.
Last week we met with an accountant, to go over our taxes. Shockingly enough, we got a $475 refund. However, we still owe the IRS some money from a Warner Bros.-fueled screw-up several years ago. So, the refund will go towards that, and not into our pocket. But I was expecting to write a check… so I was pretty happy. How’d you do this year? How close were you to the no refund/no additional moneys owed sweet spot?
I have to attend an event tonight that requires me to dress up a little. Not a fan. I always feel like a Chris Farley character whenever I get fancied-up.
I think I’m going to have a pair of jeans and a Magnolia Thunderpussy t-shirt in the car, and change in the parking lot. Or maybe I should take it a step further, and have a tearaway suit made, so I could just rip the whole thing off while exiting the building? Yeah! Wonder if there’s time?
I know this isn’t much, but I need to go. If you guys want to discuss Boston, or whatever else is on your minds, go ahead. Use the comments link below.
And I’ll be back tomorrow, for real.
Have a great day!
Now playing in the bunker
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“It’s More Than A Feeling”
There. Boston has been discussed.
White shirt, thunderpussy t underneath.
Yeah, I heard everyone at the race had a blast…
Yeah, too soon.
One of my co-workers came up with that about an hour after it happened.
Regardless of how much time has elapsed, that would be said. Besides, somebody had to get that ball rolling.
A buddy of mine worked at NASA at the time of the Challenger explosion. He “heard it happen” on the news on the car radio on the way to work. By the time he got there, his co-workers were already cracking jokes along those lines. These were NASA employees saying “Need Another Seven Astronauts”.
Ugh… I initially owed over $60k in addition to my withholdings, then through the magic of my CPA showing me that some earnings were carried interest it went down to $45k, thanks for the tip, Mitt… I filed an extension and sent in a check for that amount because I still haven’t figured out exactly what I owe…
I’m getting a decent refund which will be gojng towards paying off the vet billl from my pug’s hospital stay for aspiration pneumonia. Second time within 6 months.
$4250 refund. Since I’m one step away from an EZ form, i did my own taxes for the first time in 15 years
I’ve got about $2k coming back. I need to see if I can adjust things so I get less withheld.
Funny you should mention the vegetables, Jeff. I just polished off a big bowl of broccoli with olive oil and (lots of) garlic. I’ll be sure to keep the community apprised of any… um, notable results.
I always get nice Federal refunds since I withhold the zero dependents on my “side business” self-employment income, then rush my tax shit to the accountant about January 3rd.
They file electronically, I got my $7,700 refund mid-February.
It’s already gone and I have no idea what the hell I spent it on.
I never actually ever see a refund. My accountant always puts it on account with the IRS, so it will apply to the next year’s taxes. I owe nothing out of pocket this year, so it must have worked. He filed for an extension this year, so I don’t have the info back yet for this year’s return. Last year’s return was 26 pages long, cause I live off the market. I used to do it myself, but I can’t anymore. Having a CPA firm do it is a big load off.
A few grand refund, half as much as last year. Turns out my business returned a $345 profit last year, instead of losing a couple’a thousand like it usually does. I like getting refunds, and work my taxes that way. My hope is to not be behind or in extra debt so that I can spend it on fun stuff, instead of bills.
Who is that in the main picture, looks like Joe Flynn (from McHale’s Navy and other classics) with a giant sausage. You’ve had that up before.
That’s Spencer showing off the salami he won on, “Let’s Make a Deal”.
Cargo shorts, a dashiki and some Brikenstocks. You’re a goddamn artist for christ sake. Get use to it. It’s their problem if they can’t handle it.
I got a little over $980 back and that seems like about as much as I made all year so I’m taking the rest of the year off.
Try steamed fruit for a while. Apples, pears, pineapple, banana. Add some sliced almonds and even sprinkle some non-sugary granola on it. Grapes, strawberries and oranges too. If you find yourself wanting to wearing pastels and start drinking your beer with a pinky out, get a sack of cheeseburgers….STAT!
Don’t forget the goatee.
Steamed food is the stovetop equivalent of microwaving – you get no Maillard action. But fruit – raw or cooked – goes great with cheese. Try dried apricots with bleu cheese, or apples with Gruyere. Pure awesomeness. Pairs like that work in a salad, too. I believe the key is salty + sweet.
Since the, “Event”, (why do I hate that word so? I think, “This thing I gotta do”, has a nicer ring to it) is tonight so he can’t just sprout a goatee. But…a really tacky, obviously fake glue-on would be just the thing.
I always look forward to a big refund, even though I know the smart people say to adjust your withholdings to get it right. (By “big refund” I mean about $2000.)
My daughter is getting married in September, and my big refund was just a drop in the bucket toward the wedding expenses. That’s where all my extra money is going this year.
A close friend spent a crazy amount of dough on his daughter’s wedding last year. The marriage lasted six months. I’ve paid for all my weddings myself, including the first one when I was 26. It might be reasonable to take the position that if a couple can’t afford a wedding, they can’t afford a marriage. Young people need to develop a basic grasp of economics; it never occurred to me that my wedding was the financial responsibility of people who were doing what they could to save for their retirement. Good luck….jtb
Root 66 says
Jeff–for your “Event” you should have pulled out a page from your “Every Thursday a Theme” chart: this week is, “Constantly lick your front teeth.” That would make an impression, I assure you!
Got a refund this year because we jacked up our federal withholding. They take an extra $50 out of mine each paycheck – forgot what Beloved has taken out. I think total Fed & State will be around $3000. It’s going towards a future house purchase. Or the next liquor tasting event.
Twenty bucks! I have my withholding set perfectly, finally.
I owed the fed, but got a refund from the state, and after paying 18 bucks to “Tax Act” for the e-file, I am left with $20.
Between state and federal I had to pay $86k.
I don’t even bother with withholdings and crap like that. I’d have to withhold 100% of my pay and still end up owing.
similar here: paid $59.99 for turbo tax and paid the GIvernment $63
I feel sorry for you and all those in the mid-six-figure income neighborhood. I’d like to tell you HOW sorry, but I’m a little busy concocting yet another new tuna recipe for dinner. However, I AM sorry for your math skills.
I’d probably enjoy a higher income if I had some basic skills, like how to hit the “Reply” button.
Just to be fair, your math is probably accurate IF you’re married to Taylor Swift, in which case you have my genuine sympathies.
Tuna? Lucky bastard… try corn flakes/no milk.
You had a cup? Luxury! We had to drink our tea from a rolled up newspaper!
T. Farty McAppleass says
What are these “taxes” and “refunds” and “extensions” that everyone is talking about? Am I supposed to be doing something every year?
WB in OH says
Inside joke. You good bro!
The 4th Stooge says
Meh…I got about $1100 and some change back, and planned to save that money for a rainy day. Heh. It didn’t fucking rain, it was a goddamned monsoon! Because of my wond’rous cheapness, when I bit down on what I thought was a half-popped kernel of popcorn, the pain that shot through my mouth made me wish for the pain of a migraine, the crushing chest pain of heart failure and the wonderful feeling of the flu AND pneumonia.
Of course, it was only a quick skip and jump to the dreaded abscessed tooth. Since I am cheap, I decided to wait–I did the olive oil, clove oil, whateverthefuckoil, with no relief. So off-brand Motrin-PM became my new friend. Then one lovely day at work, I noticed what seemed like a small lump on the right side of my jaw, and knew EXACTLY what it was. Go to the po’ folks dental clinic, watch as a desk clerk was calm as could be, whilst nurses and dentists look at me like I was going to blow up right there. Seriously, y’all? Since this was the po’ folks clinic, I couldn’t get any pain pills, but they DID call an ambulance for me, which I didn’t want. My mother said we should take a cab. I said screw that–we take the bus! If I’m going to be out of $$$$, why not pay $3 for a bus fare/train transfer, rather than get screwed by a crooked cab driver. Alas, we didn’t even get to do that–the ambulance was there, full of hysterically surly staff, who complained about the clinic always calling an ambulance, even though it wasn’t really necessary.
To make a long story slightly longer, that was an $800 ambulance ride! Hell, when I had pneumonia in 1977, it was $100! (which was probably like $800 to my parents then!) I get to the hospital, get what has to be the weakest IV of morphine ever created–they probably watered that shit down…fuckers. The nurse tried to find a vein, and when I looked down at the floor, let’s just say there was a hell of a lot of blood on it. My blood pressure was also apparently 230/119, which means I should’ve been in convulsions or having a stroke (she bumped into it, and then didn’t bother to retake it).
Shit, I need to become a doctor or nurse with a doctorate. (Hey! I could be like House, but chew on better drugs, ’cause Vicodin is for pussies).
And THAT was how I spent my tax refund (and then some!)
For what it’s worth…I chomped down on a bad piece of candy and cracked a tooth a month ago. I also lack dental insurance, but I went to the dentist I went to when I had insurance and he fixed the problem with a crown. He gave me every discount he could, and, in the end, I think I paid about half of retail for some very good work. I’m sure it amounted to considerably less than I would have paid had I not gone to the dentist right away.
My dentist is a very nice man who understands we’re all living in a pretty crappy economy. Find one of those and hold onto him. It will be worth it.