Last night I stopped at Wal-Mart on my way home from work, to buy contact lens solution.
And before I get into all that… am I the only person in the world who ALWAYS wants to spell “lens” as “lense”? What’s the story with that? I’m a very good speller, but there are a few random words that refuse to fall into line for me. Every single time… I type it as lense, and get the red squiggly line of dumbassery. Do you have anything like that? Just some simple word that always gives you spelling trouble? Please tell us about it.
For the past two days I’d been using tap water as makeshift contact solution, and experience tells me that two days is the limit. After that, I start having problems. My eyeballs ache, and I’m prone to sudden stabbing pains that leave me with tears streaming down my face. It sometimes appears to my co-workers that I’ve just started crying, for no apparent reason. And that kind of thing can hurt a person…
So, I went to Wally World at 2:15 a.m., on my way home this morning, and it’s a very interesting place in the middle of the night.
They’re always working on the floors, for one thing. Every time I’m there late at night, they’re waxing some section of the floor. Is it like painting the Golden Gate Bridge — just a continuous never-ending process? I suspect it is. I think they have full-time waxers.
Last night I was forced to take a radical detour through the women’s underwear section to get to the lens juice. And this ain’t Victoria’s Secret… I’m always amazed at the gigantic bras there, with steel safety cage, etc. The straps are as wide as a seatbelt, and each cup could accommodate a full bushel of corn.
When I finally emerged in the toiletries section, I saw a morbidly obese woman piled-up on a motorized chair, with a young girl walking alongside her quivering girth. The motor was laboring greatly, and I sneered to myself: “Wotta selfish, irresponsible hog. That girl is only five or six years old, and should be in bed. It’s almost 2:30 in the morning!”
Was that too harsh? (Not that I feel any differently today.) What’s your reading of that situation?
I found the eye stuff, and picked up the appropriate solution. Then I decided to go ahead and buy other stuff I’ll eventually need, since I was already there. I hate to run out of toothpaste, or whatever. It’s a giant pain in the ass to have to make a special trip to the store for something like that. So, I try to keep one step ahead of it.
I walked down the deodorant aisle, and it looked like a crime scene. Or maybe the mob received a tip that a stolen bag of heroin “revenues” was hidden amongst the Speed Stick? It was a total war zone.
I nearly rolled my ankle on a cap that had been separated from some Sure, or whatever. What the hell, man? I had a feeling that when that capless thing was found, there would be a big black hair stuck to it. Blecch.
I gathered up all the stuff I wanted, and started making my way toward the cash register. And I saw Big Mama repeatedly ram a blood pressure machine with her battery-powered cart. She was irritated because she’d been forced off the main drag by the waxing crew, and was having some kind of jiggly-necked hissy fit.
The little girl was standing back a few steps, acting like this was just standard operating procedure. And I just went around them with no expression on my face.
At the register there was a teenage girl with lots and lots of rips in her jeans and a red stripe in her hair, buying a bag of beef jerky.
When it was finally my turn, the cashier had a terrifying coughing fit, and for a few seconds I thought she was going to go down. But she regained her composure, wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, and rang up my stuff.
Man, I love giant stores in the middle of the night. Do you ever shop while the rest of the world sleeps? Any good tales to tell? Please share.
And here’s a video of two British hipsters supposedly visiting a Wal-Mart for the first time. It’s kind of funny, despite the high smugness-factor. It’s worth a look, and fairly short.
See you guys next time!
Have a great day.
Now playing in the bunker
Crossroads Road for your Kindle: just $2.99!
I will repeat my oft repeated refrain–my high horse prevents me from shopping in Walmart. I hate them from the bottom of my cold, black heart. I feel dirty just visiting the People of Walmart pictures site.
I always have trouble with the name Annette–I always want to put an r at the end.
Was the woman in the chair “Sue” from Crossroads Road? Of course how would she get in the store to get in the chair in the first place?
No Wal-Mart trips in the middle of the night here. People get killed in the parking lot regularly by the Guadalajara Gangs.
No spelling words do that to me, but, I do get pissed regularly reading comments sections for newspapers, etc., and people continually spell the word “lose” as “loose”. “Losing” as “Loosing”, “Loser”, as “looser”. I go into verbal response rage over this.
Bill in WV says
It’s the words “there, their and they’re” that people can’t seem to use correctly that drives me up a wall. Rule: they’re is actually they are, so if you use they’re, first type in “they are” and see if that looks/sounds right. If it doesn’t, get it the fuck out of your sentence.
OMG, Angry – we must be related. This is the one I was going to remark on. I worked with a lady who would lay anything with a nub and after he did her and dumped her, I’d get these instant messages “He’s such a LOOSER.” No – you got it wrong – you were the LOOSE one. He’s the LOSER.
Ten words you need to stop misspelling: http://theoatmeal.com/comics/misspelling
Root 66 says
The Oatmeal is hilarious…I want the poster for this and the one on how to use an apostrophe!
I don’t go quite that late, but many times in the 11-1am range. We have a store about 3 mins from the house and going that late is alot easier to get in/out of. Almost every time I have ever been in Walmart late I always see parents in there with young kids and it blows my mind.
I get so crazy with spelling, especially when I get tired, I start looking up every word. In fact, it took me an hour just to finish these sentences. Seriously, my spelling is terrible.
Wally World is always an experience no matter when you go. My girlfriend loves to go in the middle of the night for the laugh. We were at the bar one night and she wanted to leave after the bar closed and go to Walmart in our drunken stupor just to point and laugh. We didn’t go though. My luck…I would have ended up pointing and laughing at the “stupid badge” while receiving a DUI.
Phantom Railfan says
“License” has given me trouble since elementary school, and does to this day. I’m not even entirely certain I’ve spelled it correctly here. I have trouble with “heaven” too. It always looks like it needs another “a” somehwere.
I was in a Kroger once late at night, and nearly every aisle had something different and weird going on. One aisle had a couple of shirtless drunk guys singing “Stardust” (?!), another aisle had a woman on her knees puking violently, and a guy in the produce department was trying to juggle tomatoes with no success. There was also some commotion arising back near the meat department–I saw a whole frozen chicken hurtling through the air followed by a chorus of yells, but I decided not to hang around. The cops were pulling up as I left. On another occasion, I was in a different Kroger late at night and got stuck in the only open cashier’s lane behind a woman trying to buy a box of Magnum condoms and having her credit cards repeatedly declined. She was absolutely frantic,and even tried to bargain with the cashier, offering what little cash she had. When that didn’t work, she shouted “DAMN IT I NEED THESE!!!” loud enough that the few customers in the store all looked up. Embarassed, she slunk out of the store without completeing the purchase…
that’s my mispell too. And apparently misspell.
my worst typing error – not really spelling is I ALWAYS want to type herald as herlad and I used to manage four websites with Herald in the url.
Kids out in the middle of the night, especially under 10 – I twitch just thinking about it. And I can get up on my high horse since my ‘baby’ is 23.
I completely understand up to age 1, babies will completely screw up your sleep and wake cycles and you could have a diaper, tylenol or formula emergency in the middle of the night.
About 10 years ago my husband and I used to go out to dinner late on Saturday nights (sans kid) and I would be amazed by the number of people with under 5 year old kids in a smoking, alcohol serving bar restaurant. It would be 12:15 and parents would be dragging kids in the door and looking for a table.
I added about 7 auto-corrections to Outlook to fix the many typos I make when attempting “Let me know” – I think I’ve done it properly three times total. It’s always “Le tmek now” or something similar, so a while back I said screw it & now make Outlook deal with my lazy typing.
I’m thinking about renting one of these to get away from it all so I can finally read Crossroads Road…
I can never spell occasion right….can never remember if it’s 2 c’s or two s’s. Well, have to admit you got me with this update, Jeff; caught me sterotyping once again. When you were complaining about the selfish woman in the electric wheelchair, my first impression was that you get as angry as I do about obese people using these wheelchairs. I know that sometimes people have medical conditions that cause them to be obese, but I’d say the majority of the time, they have just let their fat, lazy asses balloon up so big, they aren’t even capable of hauling said fat ass around the store. And that irks me. I mean, what must the TRULY handicapped, paralyzed people feel other than outrage about that. They’d give ANYTHING to be able to get out of that wheelchair and walk on their own and then you have people who have chosen to do that to themselves. Downright disgrace. Alright…I’m done here.
Most excellent! “Jiggly-necked hissy fit” is one of your finest!!!
“Perhaps” messes with me…probably for the same reason “lens” gets to you…there should be an “e” after that sharp “s” dammit! I know how to spell it properly, obviously, but I HATE that that’s the correct way. My skin’s crawling just thinking about it…
As for Wal-mart in the middle o’ night, I’m pretty sure your experience was par for the course. That’s the hour I try to go…fewer miscreants to rub shoulders with and whatnot. It stems from being a pizza delivery driver in a past life and getting off work at 3 or 4 am and heading out for sundries. Our Wal-mart is a ghost town at that hour with the occasional exceptions you’ve stereo-typed above (and the hunter/fisherman buying ammo or fishing licenses prior to heading out for today’s catch). It’s MUCH more palatable than going during prime time when you could find yourself shoulder to shoulder with half the grid of the Wal-mart game, random ex-cons, welfare mamas, carnies, or whomever/whatever else happens to wander in there. Yuk!
I’m probably too snobby to shop there, but I’m too cheap to not go…4am is my compromise.
Two favorite Wally World’s….. the one in Waco, TX on a rainy Saturday, and the one on I35 and 183 in Austin, any time after 2am.
All the pics from People of Walmart probably came from these two stores.
Our KMart, no matter what time of the day, always looks desperate and abandoned, like something out of one of those futureistic movies. The type where the flourescent lights flicker and you hear the dripping of 100 shot up sodie and water bottles. Cue to the zombies and six remaining humans. But that’s fantasy. My Kmart is an actual business. There are always disreputable people lurking behind a floor model washing machine. You walk by thinking “Is this mofo playing with himself?”
Oh and the word “restaurant” slows my typing to a crawl.
I very rarely shop at Walmart and when I do I never find it an enjoyable experience: If I go during the day I’m forced to navigate through throngs of sub-human troglodytes presumably out on day-passes from whatever institution they are normally warehoused in. If you think I’m being harsh check out this website: http://www.peopleofwalmart.com/
A couple of years ago they were doing a “feedback survey” at the checkout. When the girl asked “What would improve your Walmart experience” I answered “Zyklon B”, a reference she fortunately didn’t understand.
It’s not much better at night. Without the distraction of other customers you are able to focus on things that might otherwise escape your attention such as the smell of substandard merchandise (I’m not being facetious here: 90% of what they sell is a) made in China and b) made of plastic. There’s a distinctly “toxic” odor emanating from it.) or the fact that everything looks like it was handled by kids with filthy hands.
The only attraction I can see is the supposedly lower prices, which is complete bullshit if you stop and look at things carefully. Certain items, such as milk and pop are cheaper, but these are lost-leaders. On average most items in Walmart are priced the same or higher than the competition.
Zyklon B. Oh you……
Big Bear in OH says
Too damn funny. Zyklon B. Laughed out loud for a couple minutes at that one.
Tipsey McChugney says
Wallmart is the only store I ever go to when I am looking to buy me a wall of some sort. They’re selection of walls is second to none. You can bet you’re money on it, to.
It’s that good!
I used to be one of those kids who won spelling contests, but lately find that I can’t handle some common words like “embarrass” or “millennium” without hoping spell-check will help me out. On an odder note, when I’m hand-writing something, I tend to duplicate my most common typos for the words I’m writing.
I frequently go to WalMart late at night, in large part because my husband works swing shift and after work is when he’s available to help with heavy lifting that gives arthritic hips trouble. We must go to a really tame one, since the biggest problem I’ve seen at the 24-hour one we use is maneuvering around stockers doing their thing. As for pricing, they’re frequently enough the best price on items I need, especially in grocery, health/beauty, and pet supplies to make them a good bet.
The word for the day after today changes its spelling every time i try to write it.
JR in Sammmish says
we would stop in Wal-Mart after leaving the casino at 2am. Nothing but stockers and shop-lifters. I think the employees were shoplifting too. By mistake I wandered into the garden area by myself. There could have been people being murdered and raped back there and no one would have been the wiser. It was scary.
I’d be lying if I didn’t say that there weren’t a few spelling conundrums lieing in wait to trip me up.
Or is it the other way around????
Lying on the floor and lying through my teeth can be spelled the same way, can they?
This fucking text box I’m typing in says that “lieing” is a spelling error. Fuck you Mr. Wordsmith!
LYER LYER PANTS ON Fire
I know this is a page out of yesterday’s notebook….but I am sitting in a fucking traffic clusterFUCK downtown PGH, worse than usual, because 60,000 people are headed to Heinz Field for the U2 Big Concert. I have gone 3 blocks in 20 min. Some Indian (dot not feather) just cut me off because he HAD to be in front of me….he keeps spitting out of his window (?!)
A whole bunch od dudes in tight lycra bike shorts and fanny packs riding their bikes down the center lane. I was hoping lugie- dude hocks one as they rode by.
If I had something sharp I’d stick it in my eye.
Thanks for letting me vent
Oh bikerchick do you smoke? Nothing pisses off a lycra clad “Lance Armstrong Wannabe” more than sailing through a thick ring of Lucky Strike haze. And getting flicked with ashes. If you can burn one – 1,000 points. Watch the front wheel wobble as lycra and firestick meet.
No..I don’t smoke but after reading that senario I may start!! In 20 yrs you’ll see me in Walmart with my iron lung.
The we can rearrange Jethro Tull’s Aqua Lung to your liking:
Sitting in a car jam
Eyeing biker boys with bad intent
Smoke is puffing from my coupe
Hazy carcinogens flowing through the sunroof
So you ride yourselves over the fields and
you move all your peddling yields and
your bikers don’t know how it feels to be smoked by bike chick.
Chuck in Belpre says
Two Tull references in one post…splendid!
I was in that traffic jam too! It took me 2 flippin’ hours to get from Pittsburgh proper to the North Hills. UGH! Side story, we were in the HOV lane when we blasted by some poor sap broken down next to the median. His license plate said “Game Over”. Oh, I do believe it is sir. I do believe it is.
Incidentally, the word “license” frequently trips me up.
madz & jtb: great minds think alike! Awesome!!
Gretchen: It took me 1 1/2 hrs. for what is normally a 30 min drive home. AND 1/4 tank of gas. People were driving out of town like the bomb hit. It was absolute madness and maddening. And those fanny-packed dickbeaters can eat it.
I root for A Baseball Team Which I Will Not Mention Again For The Time Being, At Least Until They Stop Causing Me To Have Seizures,and the front office has been referring to its young pitchers (who aren’t ready yet) as “the Cavalry.”
Which causes comments from readers on Team blogs that include the word “calvary.”
“Calvary” and “Cavalry” are quite different concepts, though I suppose a joke or two could be made considering the Team in question.
What the fuck is up with saying “should of”? IT’s “SHOULD HAVE,” or “SHOULD’VE.” Looooosers.
Wal Mart, late-style and down here on MD’s Eastern Shore, is truly theater of the absurd. We’ve got lots o’ talent ’round these here parts.
By the way, I forgot- I’m dumb in occasional spurts and fits, and often avoid the word “necessary” and also the word “necessarily,” because to use these words causes a cease in normal brain function.
I’m sounding it out like a first-grader with a contact high.
I avoid them even when they seem to be required, or unavoidable. Unless I’m complaining about them.
That will be all.
You know those fuzzy little animals that hang out in parks and eat dead winos? Those swgrssles? That’s my spelling Kryptonite word.
My resolve to avoid WalMart has remained strong, though shaky. Until, serendipitously, last night, when I discovered Intercontinental Mart, a half-mile up from WalMart here. You can stop in at 3pm and buy a pack of smokes (regular, and the higher octane Canadian varieties), a six of beer, 4Loko, Hostess products, what appear to be very angry Japanese cleaning supplies, spices by the metal scoop out of wooden barrels, a harmonica, some Mounds bars, woks large enough to deep fry an elk, running shoes, Santaria candles, ‘bath salts’, fake Viagra, giant brass statues of the diety of your choice with little altars to sit them on, WD40, tree shaped air fresheners, and every single drug accoutrement ever imagined. I am in love. WalMart? I SPIT on your so-called WalMart. HA.
I want to shop there. Mainly for the Angry Japanese Cleaning Supplies.
Hostess products AND smokes? Two of the four food groups — hell, I’m in. The fake Viagra is a bonus, but clearly not a boner.
jtb: “….The fake Viagra is a bonus, but clearly not a boner.” If you cant beat’em, join ’em!
hostess products, fake Viagra, 4Loko and nag champa incense. thats all four covered.
You know those fuzzy little animals that hang out in parks and eat dead winos? Those swgrlsses? That’s my spelling Kryptonite word.
My resolve to avoid WalMart has remained strong, though shaky. Until, serendipitously, last night, when I discovered Intercontinental Food Mart, a half-mile up from WalMart here. You can stop in at 3pm and buy a pack of smokes (regular, and the higher octane Canadian varieties), a six of beer, 4Loko, Hostess products, spices by the metal scoop out of wooden barrels, some Mounds bars, woks large enough to deep fry an elk, running shoes, Santaria candles, ‘bath salts’, fake Viagra, giant brass statues of the diety of your choice with altars to sit them on, WD40, tree shaped air fresheners, and every single solitary drug accoutrement ever imagined. Here it is:
And the universe was not done fucking with my head, either. When I left the place, there was a homeless dude sitting outside the door of the place with a goddamn WOLF.
I am officially over WalMart.
Well, I’ve posted twice. I’m going for three. *slinks out in disgrace*
But it REALLY HAPPENED.
Since I’m 37th, I have to quote a Devo lyric:
“I’m envious of your IQ of
No wal-mart stories here. I’m a wally h8er. Don’t go there. Wouldn’t be prudent.
Chuck in Belpre says
I’ve only been in Wal-Mart late at night one time. That was enough. It was like Carnival of Souls but with better lighting. I swear I don’t know where these people come from. One group looked like Jane Goodall had gone all Edward Scissorhands on a family of Silverbacks.
Carnival of Souls! Ha ha, that’s perfect!
My boss of the last ten years was mostly illiterate. Every time he sent out an email he refused to check it or have some one proof read it. I would get hold of it, print it out, go through it with a red pen and fix all the spelling and grammar mistake and put a big fat ‘F’ in a circle at the end of it and stick it on the notice board.
I looked forward to getting them because they were so bad that they were hilarious. One day he found my corrections stuck to the wall and sent out an email that included topics of “respect, people living in galss hoses, and grifiti” all without any punctuation.
Needless to say, it went up on the wall immediately.
Oh shit! I made a mistake!
He also didn’t know the difference between ‘insure’ and ‘ensure’
We don’t have a wall mart here but K-mart is the local substitute. Man, there are some weirdos there.
Kmart is to Walmart as Huddle House is to IHOP.
Average Jane says
I’m too much of a snob to shop at Walmart, but I can highly recommend the generic Target brand of contact lens solution (and yes, I always want to spell it “lense”). It’s 1/3 the price of name brand stuff and seems to be exactly the same.
I refuse to spell the store name out, and refer to it simply as W@lM@rt. It makes me curse, so I return the favor.
Our local store specializes in what I refer to as “CSC”: Complementary Screaming Children. Most of them are running around half naked, barefoot and dirty. Momma and Baby Daddy are strolling behind lazily, hollering to Xanthan and Zedra to ‘hush it and c’mon back’ as they scratch their fresh tattoo scabs and lick each other.
There’s a newish, smaller, Walmart near me that is kinda Targetish, and always has plenty of cashiers, so I don’t mind going there too much.
Going to a regular Walmart during a busy day is an agonizing hellish experience. At times I think, “God, I wish there was some way I could call in an airstrike!”
Late-night is my preferred way to visit Walmart, if I have to.
I stopped at a Walmart, I wouldn’t normally frequent, a few weeks ago on my way home from getting my hair did. It was a little smaller but, surprisingly, very nice. It was clean, well stocked, well ventilated, and every cash register line was open manned with cashiers that had all their teef. In and out.
On the flip side…the Walmart in Robinson Twp is just the opposite. It’s one of those “super stores”. Groceries, deli, junk, pharmacy, garden, tires and oil change, eye glasses, and Mickey D’s. There is never a good time to go. It’s always over crowded and under-ventilated. And out of 20-some-odd cash registers to checkout, there is usually only 2 or 3 open.
THEN…At Christmas, I had to wait in another line for some old-timer to check inside of my bag against my receipt to make sure no five-finger discount was happening. I tried to just sneak by and the old man yelled at me and ordered me to “stop and don’t move until I get over there!” I walked out when he turned to pat down someone else. Fuckers.
My ‘local’ Wal-Mart is 83 miles away and not open 24hrs. That’s not at all surprising knowing 93% of that town is under a Parole Board curfew. I shop there now and then if just for my complimentary pat-down.
Wow, For 166 miles’ worth of fuel, I should hope there is a ‘real’ store within that radius. And if you get a pat-down, I should further hope that it’s the coveted ‘enhanced’ pat-down rather than just a run-of-the-mill one.
They are in the process of building a ‘super wal-mart’ about 3/4 mile from my house. I am not looking forward to the day it opens – it will completely screw up my back way out of the neighborhood.
Chill..For good grocery shoppin’ the drive is only 50 miles to the north. Ok food shoppin is 25 and the local is 1/4 mile but kinda …meh. Then again. I haven’t starved to death in my sleep the past seven years. The mercantile 12 miles away gets me Poop-Doggie-Dog’s chow and sells Wranglers for me. I do the 83 only when I’m doin’ more stuff another 25 to the south. I sometimes employ a self pat-down just to save on gas.
I did buy my glasses at The Wal-Mart while I was in Cincy. I tried them on and looked around and the girl asked me how they felt. I said fine but they seem to make everyone’s ass look big.
That’s quite a town. I’m wondering: if you showed up at midnight, would one of the other 7% beat you silly out of patdown jealousy?
It’s not so much that I want to spell my name differently but with a name like mine and in a reasonably senior position at a telco I have the unenviable habit of leaving out the “r” in my name when typing, not that there’s anything wrong with that. Problem is I send many departmental emails like this, much to the mirth of my colleagues. Got so bad I have an auto correct set up to change “gay” to “gary”, works well until you comment in an email thread with your friends that our buddy who is now adding rasberry juice to his beer is “oh so gary”, and as you can probably imagine there are much worse.
my local walmart at any time day or night is like time square. cars and people all over the place, music blasting, trash all over the parking lot and sidewalks, screaming children, shopping carts turned over, sketchy characters, ghetto people, hicks, white trash, you name it. i really try to avoid that place, if i must go, i park back by lawn and garden and pay there too. it keeps me away from the crazies. on another note, i agree with kmart being a ghost town, i dont know how that placeis still in business, never any customers or workers around and every store is so outdated. not a kmart fan either.
Big Bear in OH says
We have two within “reasonable” distance from the house. The one is filled with sketchy characters from 7pm to 7am, the other is a ghost town in the same time frame. The sketchy character one is closer, but forces me to carry a weapon every time I walk in there, for fear of finding myself in the middle of a riot over food stamps, baby mommas or who controls the meth distribution in my fair city. The ghost town one is nicer to go to, but requires I drive an extra twelve miles…in a pickup truck that means an extra two gallons of fuel, and thus, I tend to just strap a .45 to the belt, grab an extra mag and hope that I don’t have to shoot it out.
I personally believe that at 2 AM every morning Wal Marts everywhere become the Source of All Ignorance in the world. A veritable font of brain-melting chemical warfare, meandering out the automatic doors and wafting invisibly through the ether to settle on the unsuspecting people of Earth. I think it lasts for about an hour or so but since at this point there’s probably a Wal Mart in every U.S. time zone, Ignorance keeps pretty well charged up.
Wal mart is about 1mile away. I almost only go after midnight. The McD’s is 24/7 in there.
I’m currently cooking a melvin circuit court pot pie bought at walmart.
Yeah, N&N are laughable and the cashiers at Subway are twits, but the insight and word selection in this paragraph is what separates the “can do” from the “want to”….
“When it was finally my turn, the cashier had a terrifying coughing fit, and for a few seconds I thought she was going to go down. But she regained her composure, wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, and rang up my stuff.”
Tipsey McChugney says
Jeff might want to get tested for TB at some point within the next week or so.
Trust me, I’m a doctor (but not the kind that helps people).
And for everyone (including me) who believed Glenn Beck could get neither lower nor slimier, he manages to insult those bad kids who got in the way of those bullets in Norway…
I fear for the country I love. Anybody from Canada want to buy this Beck blackguard real cheap?
hot fuzz says
Nah…it’s ok. He’s all yours until the rapture.
Chuck in Belpre says
Did we ever get the Double Secret N&N update? If so I didn’t get the email.
I was thinking about that the other day, too.
Jeff, are you holding out on us?
Root 66 says
I worked at Wal-Mart for seven years at their distribution center, not a store. However, when I worked second shift, I would occasionally wander into a Wally World at around 2:30 in the morning. There was always this one guy running the floor buffer. He would mumble to himself incessantly and every once in a while grunt like a Neanderthal. I made a point not to make any eye contact, quickly made my selection and boogied on down the line outta there! Pretty freaky place.
I always snicker like an 8th grader when people confuse ‘prostrate’ and ‘prostate’ and then try to use them interchangeably…good times!
Root 66 says
Other spelling problems that light up the spell- checker for me:
-the (usually comes out ‘hte’)
-for (usually comes out ‘fro’ and the spell-checker DOESN’T catch it!)
Weird is the word that pisses me off what happened to I before e except after c??? Wierd hmmmm
Wired people can be weird. And weird people are just wired different.
And what ever happened to…You before I except after tea…?
Chuck in Belpre says
Boone County, WV? Seriously?
CHARLESTON, W.Va. – A West Virginia public vocational school has been shut down indefinitely after traces of methamphetamine were found throughout the building during an investigation of the principal and a teacher.
State Police Sgt. Andy Perdue said Monday that traces of the drug were found in the ducts, principal’s office, hallways and bathrooms of the Boone County Career and Technical Center. Perdue says the teacher admitted he smoked meth with the principal in the principal’s office.
Andy didn’t follow in Frank’s footprints and flew the coop to become a State Police Sargeant.
“It takes a tough man to make a tender culprit.”
Oh I absolutely have strange times at the 24hr stores. I recently switched to vampiric hours at my job, nights are brutal. Being conscious during “normal” hours is essential to survival-doctor’s appointments are impossible at 2:30 am for example. I am a firm believer in the Walmart Game being much easier to complete in California during the witching hour…face raisin! 2 points.