James R. Landry
Brash, because he grew up in Boston.
Lawrence Kessler
Smoked his own meats.
Robert L. Caldwell
Knew how to work the system.
David K. Mosher
A Budweiser man.
Anna Garvey
Owned many items emblazoned with the image of an owl.
Albert J. Hubbard
“There’s no such thing as too spicy.”
Allison Lundy
Strong advocate of the all-inclusive resort.
Judy Masters
Had many surgeries.
Bernard L. Peet
Heroically ignored grammar rules.
Timothy Canfield
Nostalgic for the era of the “full bush.”
Harold Cottrell
Never shit at work.
Paul Granville
Tried out for the Kansas City Royals.
Maria Martel
Ate whatever she wanted.
Edward J. Stearns
Always punctual.
Edith Stark
Owned several pit bulls, referred to them as “big babies.”
Delores McDonnell
A lesbian with a sense of humor.
Albert L. Powell
Whittled.
What would be your “thing”-only obituary? How about your co-workers? Please tell us about it in the comments.
And I’ll see you guys again on Monday!
Now playing in the bunker
Try Dropbox! It’s free and fantastic.
So is Jeff Kay just your pen name, and your real name is Harold Cottrell?
Jeff Kay
Scourge of pants seats.
Boner inducer.
Do you consort with Tom Ludly: Easily aroused? Or doesn’t it matter?
Master Masterbater
Used Veet
Liked cake
Only shit at work.
Embraced laziness like a religion.
Larry Tucker – Known for jogging in coochie-cutters.
Bobby Stump – Lovable Turrets Guy
Bart Roberts – Organized and headed up a large coalition of reets in the 1970’s.
Geoff-Loved him some gay midget porn.
Never improved with age.
Drove on Blizzaks.
HA! Love it!
Believed Oswald acted alone.
Sought treatment for Ricketts: Julia Ricketts.
Honorary pilot.
Did the shopping.
He told you so.
Watched Seinfeld ‘re-runs.
Grooved to Crash Craddock.
Ken Larson…married a Leprechan
I told you I was sick
Missy Noggler… Reigning Hopscotch champion for 82 years.
Thought there was always room for Jello.
Drove Fords.
Usually caught the Earlybird.
Preferred aisle seating.
Thought umbrellas were a hassle.
Stopped for the “HOT” light at Krispy Kreme.
SPAM fan.
Never stuck with a hobby for long.
Always with the umlaut
Didn’t mind vacuuming too much
Handy with a butter knife
William Beauregard: Ate his own boogers
Hated the Yankees
His attention span was too long
Put ketchup on scrambled eggs
Hated No-Passing zones.
Carried fifteen golf clubs.
Farted when he coughed.
Could tell the Sklar brothers apart.
Lee’s the one with the long beard, right?
Never needed a penile implant.
Didn’t have a tact button.
Once had intercourse with an Amish.
Never rode the brakes.
Let bygones be bygones.
Art Hebbers: Always used his turn signal.
Could hit to all fields.
Didn’t have a gag reflex.
Best. Comment. Ever.
Never stood when he could sit and never sat when he could lay down