In June 1995 Toney and I had been married for almost two years. We were still kidless, and owned a house in the far, far urban sprawl suburbs of Atlanta.
It was a nice house, our first. We bought it from the couple who had it built just two years earlier. They were now going through a divorce, but had put a lot of work into the place, and it was a beauty. It had three bedrooms and three baths, and we couldn’t believe we actually lived there.
I don’t know if it was the fancy new home, or what, but we were going through a strange (in retrospect) yuppie phase. We weren’t making enough money to be real yuppies, but we tried. We went to trendy restaurants, took ridiculous trips we couldn’t afford, and hung around with like-minded friends: everyone trying to act all sophisticated ‘n’ shit.
Just a regular weekend would be something like this:
After a pot of hazelnut coffee, and blueberry muffins (or somesuch), we’d straighten up the house. It was never messy, so “straightening” consisted of lining up the magazines on the coffee table, and washing our pint glasses from the night before.
Then we’d go into Atlanta and meet up with friends, or wander around Virginia Highland, or Buckhead. We’d have lunch somewhere exceedingly cool, and maybe sit outside and act like hotshots.
Around 6:30 we’d go to Moe’s and Joe’s, our favorite dumpy bar, and they’d bring us a pitcher of Pabst Blue Ribbon without us asking for it. We were regulars, and the (ironic?) pitcher of PBR was automatic. Occasionally we’d have food there, but it was mostly just beer.
Sometimes we’d go see a band play during the evening (for free, of course… I never paid for shows during those days), or we’d go hang out with our friends Matt and Sue. But we usually returned home, and cooked out.
We did a lot of late night, semi-drunk, grilling in 1994 and 1995. We’d buy big ol’ steaks from a fancy-pants designer grocery store, and make a big deal out of it. Occasionally friends would join us, but most of them didn’t like to drive so far. They claimed we were practically living in South Carolina.
On Sundays I worked at a bookstore, to help support our fake yuppie lifestyle, and Toney went grocery shopping.
It was a fun time. We were only starting down the road of Massive Responsibility, and were still able to maintain our carefree early-dating-days lifestyle. Of course it was all a house of cards (credit cards, to be exact), but we had a good time.
Fifteen years later, in 2010, just a regular weekend is a little different…
We now have one teenage boy, and another almost-teenage boy. Their friends are in and out of our house, and the noise level is amazing. They all play instruments, and it sometimes sounds like we’re living inside a Guitar Center.
The house is sometimes messy, instead of just “messy.” Toney runs wide-open all the time, shuttling the boys around and tending to her many duties. She works full-time, is the president of a high-maintenance organization, and the director of another.
I’ve always got some kind of creative “project” I’m agonizing about, or yard work hanging over my head, and it’s generally low-grade chaos around our house.
But we gather on Saturday evenings for dinner. In the summer we cook steaks or burgers on the grill, and actually pay attention to each other for a while. The rest of the time it feels like we’re just passing in the hall, on our way to other stuff.
One thing hasn’t changed in fifteen years, though. On Sundays I go to work, and Toney does the grocery shopping. Nothing much has changed about Sunday.
It’s a different way of living, for sure. But the current weekend is much more grounded in reality, than the old one. Which is more fun? Well, it’s always a blast to live beyond your means. Right? Especially when you don’t yet have experience with the consequences.
Sometimes we get nostalgic for the 1995 weekend, but I remind Toney of 1997 and 1998, after the chickens had come home to roost. And that SUCKED. We have a tendency to remember the good times, and forget the bad ones. That’s human nature, I think.
On Saturday afternoons Toney and I occasionally go to the so-called yuppie bar in our neighborhood, for a couple of pints. And I watch the people there, the way they act, and can’t believe how obnoxious they are. And I wonder if some old codger thought the same thing about us, fifteen years ago.
After the boys have left the nest, we talk about returning to Atlanta (or some other big city) and buying a condo in a high-rise building. It might or might not happen, but I like the idea of giving it another shot, and doing it the right way. You know, twenty-five years later. We’ll see what happens.
And now, predictably enough, I’d like to know how regular weekends differ for you, comparing 1995 and 2010. A few of you were probably kids in 1995, so I assume they’d be much different. Use the comments link below to tell us all about it.
And I’ll see you guys again tomorrow.
Have a fantastic day!
Now playing in the bunker
Pre-order your summer WVSR shirt here!
Swami Bologna says
Where’d my “FIRST” go?
Bill in WV says
Rat farts !!
Swami Bologna says
My first FIRST disappeared. Second one took.
Hmm. Might have to try Moes and Joes, for the sheer thrill of saying “You know what? Jeff Kay drank beer here.”
In 1995 I was a 5th grader, so I’m pretty sure an average summer weekend consisted of cartoons, running around outside, and going out to dinner with my parents. A trip to the town pool or a visit to a friend’s house if I was lucky.
Now it’s sleeping till 11, checking email/fb, gardening, a few hours running errands at the stores, then watching movies/ video games till my friends are ready to go out around nine. We go all kinds of places so its hard to say what’s average yet, but I guess its a bar 50% of the time!
The Further Evidence must have been awesome – it has already been taken down.
Gonad the Bavarian says
I got married on 1995. We were definitely yuppies. I can guarantee there were many folks in their 40’s and 50’s that hated our grand gang of highfalutin douche bags. We liked to travel on a whim. We NEVER ate dinner at home. Had to live in a gated community with live guards 24/7. We played that way for 4 years till the first bun was in the oven. Now we have a small home with acreage in the country. Youth hockey runs our lives for 9 months of the year. It’s way different but life is good.
In ’95, I used to spend Sunday afternoons with a couple friends, doing wine tasting. At least, that’s what we called it. We’d taste, take notes, and act like we really knew what we were talking about. All this, while watching the Nascar race. I gues that makes us redneck yuppies. Now, we just watch the race, and pound our personal alcohol preferences. It still comes out the same: we’re always drunk when the race is over. Other than that, weekends are the same.
In 1995 I had a job where I worked 12 hour rotating shifts. One weekend I worked Friday-Saturday-Sunday, and the following weekend I had Friday-Saturday-Sunday off. Complicating matters was after 2 weeks we swapped day shift to night shift, meaning on the Fridays I had off, 50% of the time I had to sleep all day to rest up for Saturday-Sunday.
Now I work Monday-Friday 8:00am-4:30pm. No 3-day weekends, and I love it.
The Mole says
What the hell was “Further Evidence” today?
Oh yes, in 1995 I was 10, sooo yeah. My dad was doing real well back then with his construction business and regularly took us kids to Wisconsin Dells (my younger sister and brother), and camping at Yogi Bear Campground in Indiana. In the Dells he was always taking us to the ritzier hotels, making sure we had the best time possible, and I’ve always enjoyed camping and still do as most of you know, so I wasn’t concerned with the occasional hick trips to Yogi.
Now, I’ve moved out, and live with my boyfriend Ben, and since him and I have started dating back in 2007, we’ve taken many trips. We’ve been too 2 music festivals, one of them in which we had to take a roadtrip from Chicago to California, and one in Rothbury, Michigan. We’ve taken 2 trips to the Dells, been too 6 Phish concerts, 2 of them in Delevan, WI at Alpine Valley Music Theatre (if you haven’t seen a concert here, you should, it’s beautiful), and Umphrey’s McGee concert in St. Louis, MI back in 08′ at The Pageant Theatre. We’re going back to Alpine Valley on August 15th for another Phish show. I’ve actually taken more trips with my boyfriend in the past 3 years then I took with my parents my whole life. We decided we are taking a trip to Disney in March (despite all the bad things), because I am determined to go to the Wizarding World of Harry Penis and cast spells on people.
So things are definitely a lot different when they were when I was a kid. The construction business isn’t doing so well because of the shitty economy so my two brothers (youngest brother was born after most of these trips), got jipped on the Dells trips.
On the weekends we usually walk up to the local bar/bowling alley and hang out with old people because they aren’t douche bags like most of the barfly cokeheads in our town that are our age, or we sit and home and drink on our backporch.
We spend our Sunday afternoons either recovering from hangovers, doing yard work, or like most, grocery shopping. Yesterday we switched off between video games because I play Halo 3 and he plays Battlefield. We’re such ‘noobs’ at the video gaming industry would call us, we sit on our headsets and yell at little kids in first person shooter games.
And that’s my ‘now and then’ life in a nutshell.
By the way, if anyone has facebook, e-mail me and let me know and I’ll add you, let me know your from the WVSR tho because I have a crazy bitch in my office who makes up fake names to get on to my facebook and send my stuff to management.
In 1995, we had been married about 2 years also. We were living in a tiny house on a big lot in Austin TX where we had landed after the ’94 Northridge Quake chased us out of LA. We had two dogs and two cats and no kids. We’d go downtown to one of the brewpubs and eat 1/2 price cheeseburgers and drink pints of IPA. Then we’d go the Gingerman (80 taps) and drink more pints, some of which I shared with my dog Bingo (he used to love Anchor Porter).
We now have the Angels (both girls) 11 and 13. 13 battles my wife about everything and 11 reminds us how good SHE is. Weekends are filled with errands, girl power parties, trips to the pool, MAJOR housecleaning and lots of barbecue. Bingo is still around, though not for much longer I fear. Maybe I’ll share some Anchor Porter with him this weekend.
hot fuzz says
here’s what the further evidence was..
If you get a dude in a blue jacket kinda freakin out a little, you’re in the right place.
Listen to the auto-tuned version. It’s hilarious.
The Jenkem King says
In 1995 I was smoking dope with my friends when I was 23.
In 2009 I am still smoking dope with my friends…..but I’m the only one that ended up marrying and having a kid and a profession.
The rest of my buds are like those old commercials where the dudes are smoking pot in their bedroom in their 20s and one of the Moms yells at them and he yells back “I’m looking for a job” and all his buddies laugh and tell him to pass the joint….those are my friends.
“sophisticated ‘n’ shit”, I love t hat.
In 1995 I was 12 or 13 and working 2 and a half jobs. The typical weekend was me filling the work truck up with gas (I was allowed to drive the work truck to get gas and no one in my no horse town cared.) and seeing all my friends going to The Lake, or The Hills with their older siblings. My older siblings were also usually in that group. I would then go work in the oil fields for 7 to 10 hours, depending on what was going on. At that age I had not yet begun to do dangerous things like climb to the top of a glycol unit, 15 feet tall and drop metal ring filters into it. May work then usually consisted of walking miles and miles of pipeline looking for and patching leaks. Or cutting grass on a good day. Then after that was done I would go home, and pick up my lawn mower (again as long as it was for work the one cop in town didn’t care if young teenagers were driving around.) Then I would go cut the grass at one of the two cemeteries or one of the many peoples houses I cut grass for. Then I would usually see Mr. Wayne Gregory at the grocery store/gas station on the way home. He would usually give me a Pabst Blue Ribbon or two (Hey Jeff, we were drinking the same thing in 1995) and I would drink them on the way home so my parents wouldn’t find out. Mmmmm…warm pabst in a can. If It was cow season I would also have to run cows in the mornings before oil field work.
Now I sit on my ass playing Playstation and drinking Leinenkugel Amber all day.
1995? Seriously? Married for 11 years, kid 9 years old, living in NC. Owned my own mortgage business. I wasn’t a soccer mom but I was president of the PTA, ( no snickering for those who know me), running my daughter to dance class, dance competitions, piano lessons, voice lessons, gymnastics class.
Had a pool and a trampoline in the back yard and always a house full of noisey kids. I was loving life.
Now, living in hot ass New Orleans, divorced, still have a pool the back yard but not the big inground just a little 3 foot deep 12 foot across to lay in the sun in. Daughter? in grad school at the Univ of New Orleans getting a Phd in Chemistry. Work? Nope, disabled!
Yes life has changed!
In 1995 I was married(happily)and had a 4yr old, a 2.5 yr old and a bun in the oven. Life revolved around the kids and they were still small and cute. We had been in our 1st house 9 yrs already and finally out of debt and hubs was making good money.
Forward to 2010, I was married(happily)to the Same guy! and have an almost 19 yr old, 17.5 yr old ans a 14 yr old plus 3 dogs(not MY idea!) Life and our money still revolves around the kids but they are less work and almost out of the house for good. We are in house #2(bigger), out of debt still including the house and hubs is making even better money. Unfortunately, college educations are making shortwork out of that money….sigh
Now if you go back to 1985…..no kids but already married(happily to same guy), working in retail and living in a roach infested house(rental)in NJ. If I wasn’t in NJ at that time & we weren’t struggling in the finance dept., it would have been golden. 😎
IN 1995………..I was the single mother of a 4 year old i was completely not prepared for. i worked most Saturdays. had just bought my first home and spent a lot of time entertaining friends and drinking.
today said child is 19 i have added an 11 year old. still a single mother on house number 2 and spend a lot of time entertaining and drinking with friends. the difference is i am not working Saturdays anymore.
Lee Harvey Ramone says
A regular weekend back in 1995?
I used to enjoy getting dressed up like Sammy Davis Jr and singing gangsta rap in front of a big mirror until I got to tired. Then I’d sit around and eat oreos with my orangutan Chuck until it was time to go out drinking for the night dressed up like Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz. I was really into costumes at the time.
Mark in Iowa says
Back in 95 we’d take trips, eat out, buy pedigreed dogs, purchase cds, clothes, books and low-end electronics at the drop of a hat. We’d have the ocacaional alcohol fueled midnight bbq. Now not so much. I ask permission to buy a book or cd, electronics are a major decision and our pets come from the humane society. Did I mention we have 2 special needs kids and medical bills out the wazoo now? It’s not as much fun, but we’re making a difference in 2 young peoples lives so its all good.
Brenda Love says
In 1995 I was married to a loser.
In 2010, I am blessedly single.
Bill in WV says
I don’t remember 1995.
Holy Crap! 1995? I had just moved from a fairly well-to-do little yuppy-ish town called Oakmont to yinzer McKees Rocks…for those who know the area you are probably saying to yourself…WTF is wrong with you?? A guy…of course. I was heavily into teaching spinning, kick boxing, lifting and the gym, etc. All of which I have completely burned out on and haven’t done is a while.
I must say, though, looking back and now…. I am MUCH MUCH happier now than I was then….even though I am approaching the big 5-0 in a few years.
Its true what they say… as you get older priorities shift. What was important then I don’t give a shit about now. Once women (maybe men too, I don’t know) hit their 40’s the “give a shit factor” changes enormously!
In 1995 I was running around like a maniac.drinking, Living with man(boy) who became hubby #1, driving a camaro…I had just graduated. Now, this past weekend for example, I hosted a baby shower, have 3 boys and drive a minivan. Also am proud owner of hubby #2.
well, it doesn’t sound as good, but this is better. 🙂
I graduated from High School in 1995. A typical weekend consisted of going to work on either Friday or Saturday night at the restaurant where I was a cashier. The rest of the time I was hanging out with my boyfriend or friends from school.
Now I am married and have 2 kids: a 6 year old and a 2 year old. Weekends are spent playing with them, cleaning the house or doing yard work. I am a stay at home mom, so I view the weekend as my chance to have a break from the kids at some point.
Bill…. I see some things never change!!
1981 Don’t remember
1995 Don’t remember
2010 Don’t remember
I see a pattern forming!!!
Evil Twin's Wife says
In 1995, the Evil Twin and I were approaching our 2nd anniversary also. We had been in our first home for about a year. We both worked full time (he is still at the same job today, I’m a stay at home mom since 1998). On weekends, we partied A LOT -we had to, we had to self-medicate to block out the fact that we lived in a shitty neighborhood and all our neighbors were assholes. We’re basically the same as back then, only now we party less and live in a great house in a fantastic area.
I was 26 and both a full time student and the full time production manager of a micro brewery. I lived with my girlfriend and her sister but I never saw them much since I was out of the house about 16 hours/day. On Fridays I’d get home about 8 or 9 and we’d barbeque some steaks and pour back a few (many) beers from my keg fridge (one of the many advantages of working at a brewery). On Saturdays I’d have to work, usually setting up keg parties, and in the evening we’d have friends over and more beer would flow. Sundays was more work (picking up from the keg parties) then a quiet evening at home.
The girlfriend has now been upgraded to wife (via common law, not ceremony), we have one son (seven) and another due in 12 days (also a boy, currently knows as “sibling”). I only work one job and am home most nights by 6 or 7. Friday nights we usually go out to some variety of “family” restaurant, Swill Chalet being the current favourite, followed by an evening of mindless entertainment of video games or Family Guy marathons (yes, I do let my 7 year old child watch Family Guy. What of it?). After the wife and Der Boy are in bed I usually stay up for a couple of hours enjoying my solitude. Saturdays I sleep in, but I spend the afternoons with my mom (who is 75 going on 200): doing her shopping and generally being her only contact with the real world. In the evening there’s more family time such as a movie. Sundays we spend mucking out the house or just fucking-the-dog (whichever seems more appealing at the time), and the cycle starts again next weekend.
“Swill Chalet” should be Swiss Chalet, however “Swill” isn’t far from the truth.
IN 1995 I had three children and one more on the way. Our weekends were spent doing diaper duty, playing with the kids, reading books, going to the park, etc while trying to squeeze a little time in for us to stay connected as a married couple. Sometimes we would fall into bed exhausted without so much as a kiss. LOL
I guess you could say that our world revolved around the kids in 1995.
In 2010, the two older girls are in college and the youngest girl will start her senior year in August. Our son is starting high school as well. They all have very active lives. While we still stay involved with them, we have more time to spend time together as a couple. The weekends are basically quiet and most times the kids are out doing things with their friends. That leaves us a lot of time to hang out, have a beer or two and do more things we enjoy.
In 1995 I had very little time for myself and I would have never been able to get on the computer to do anything or even watch a TV show uninterrupted but I wouldn’t change it for anything. I’m glad I spent the time with my children. I have plenty of time for my own interests now,
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Was sorry to hear you lost you beloved PO Box
In case I missed it — is there a new one?
1995. I turned 40 and got my first tattoo. Had three sons ages 18, 16 and 7. 18 year old joined the Air Force. Weekends were spent at a ball game or two or three or camping in the rolling box o’ beds.
2010. Divorced now. Sons are 32 and 21. Middle son is deceased. I’m a grandmother. I live 700+ miles away from them because their father is an ass. If common law marriage was still legal, I’d be married to husband #2. Weekends now consist of doing what ever I want. But, I sure do miss those boys.
I was just thinking that if there is a group project that thewvsr’s can pull off to bring your family back together —
— that would be awesome.
The possibilities are endless with so many creative minds in one hive.
@Brenda Love…what a coincidence, in 1995 my wife was married to a loser. Fortunately she didn’t hold it against me and is still with me! lol
1995 I moved from an awesome dream house in Washington to Alaska. A lot less stress here, virtually no crime, and a real sense of community. I have an enjoyable job, plus get to do a radio show on Monday nights. Perfect place for me, but my wife, a native New Yorker longs for a warmer climate.
Illegal log in from work- Don’t tell
1995- Plotting to find an exit from my wife and kids. Did lots of drugs, drank more than anyone should drink. Picked up women considerably younger than me on a regular basis. Paid less for gas, cigarettes, and groceries. Liked Florida. A happy dude.
2010- Married to one of those considerably younger women. Two more kids. No drink, no drugs. Struggling to make ends meet. Hate Florida. Still happy until I leave the confines of my home. Then I gets agitated.
Joey Jo Jo says
in 1995, I was 22. I lived with my parents and had absolutely no responsibilities other than my job. I worked at 7-11, 40 hours a week, and put all of that money into CDs, weed, and booze. And Star Trek novels – I was a geek. On a weekend, I’d typically wake up at about 4 PM, get high, go to the mall and hang around the Borders coffee bar. Then go to work at 11 PM, get off at 7 AM, get high and fuck around until I fell asleep, and repeat.
Now, I get up at four god-damned 30 to get to work at 6 AM. Get home at 3, sleep on the couch for a couple of hours, watch TV and fuck around on the computer with the wife until I have to go to bed at like 9 PM.
1995: Half full of fail.
2000: Chock full of fail.
2010: Full of it.
On a side note, Touchdown Jeebus is no more. I guess you can piss off God with idolatry for only so long.
1995 I was part owner of a computer company so it was usually working half a day on Saturday with a hangover then getting shitfaced Saturday night and hoping like hell that Sunday would be quiet.
Now I work for a computer company that does not have my name in the VP spot on the corporation papers. I leave work on Friday and completely forget that I have a job until Monday morning. SWEET!!
Taiwan On says
1995 – Living with my first wife, did yardwork and listened to the Red Sox on the portable radio.
2010 – Living with the ‘rents, doing yardwork and watching the Red Sox on the flatscreen.
So, I went from living with a person who didn’t like me and listening to the Sox to living with two people who do like me and watching the Sox. Upgrade!
1995 I worked most weekends, so I was out there busting up your keg parties and generally ruining everyone’s fun. These days, weekends are split between chores, errands and reading for school. Less pay, but certainly less aggravation.
Jerry in WV says
In 1995, I had already been married for 14 years. Had two children that were 15 and 11. Spent lots of time with them. Coaching Soccer and trying to be a good Dad. The wife and I spent most weekends doing the family thing. 2010 – Now married for 29 years, still doing the family thing. This time around with grandchildren. Life is good.
1995 – Living in my own house with my daughter, working for the state, five years divorced from a nut-bag hillbilly chick who was in prison for grand theft auto. Vacations were week-long family excursions, often to amusement parks or some dreaded zoo.
2010 – Living in an apartment in Florida, working for private industry, college-educating said daughter. Vacations seem to be used mostly to repair and patch my WV house in between tenants.
Mom of 4 kids in NEPa says
Unfortunately I have to go back to 1990 to hit the no-kids time…We traveled to foreign lands..Drank expensive beers and drove cleaner, smaller cars! We had a saving account and there was more than $8.50 in it..
Now we have entered the teenage years with all 4 kids and it’ll be the death of me yet!!! No money, no time of my own and no peace from the comings and goings of guitars, amps and the like that are constantly being moved to music gigs. Kids being transported to work, sports practices or scout events.
I guess these are the times I will miss in 25 more years but right now I would really like a week off from everyone!
Soylent Ape says
Well, 1995 represented a time of transition for me from college to a period of chronic unemployment to touring in rock bands. I was in my very early 20s and I had also gone from being in a long-term relationship with a woman I loved dearly to having no romantic ties to anyone. After moving out of my college apartment, I was essentially homeless, too, although I didn’t mind sleeping in vans, motels or friends’ houses, as I was a vagabond and having a lease or mortgage was totally impractical. Depending on when you caught up with me that year, my weekend routine would have varied greatly.
In 2010, I am in my mid 30s with a house in a pretentious planned community, a stable job, an SUV, a wife and 3 pets. My weekend usually entails a meal with wifey at some overpriced casual dining restaurant, a trip to Guitar Center, and work on various independent film and local TV productions as a creative outlet. I never saw it coming!