I’m not sure what’s going on, but I’m feeling somewhat optimistic today. It’s a curious development. I hope I’m not having a series of mini-strokes. Maybe it’s the fake spring outside? The blue skies, the bright sun, and all that? It’s a hard thing to know. But I’m not grumbling under my breath too much on this Monday. It’s a surprise.
Over the weekend I went into an H.H. Gregg store for the first time, and will probably never return. If you don’t have those stores in your area, think Circuit City. In fact, I believe they’re run by some of the old Circuit City execs. They did so well with that chain, they’re doing it again!
As I walked through the front door I spotted a herd of salesmen in the middle of the store. I’m not a fan of the salesman herd: there’s always an air of multiple divorces, mustaches, and heavy cologne. I averted my eyes, instinctually, and continued toward the appliance department. I didn’t want to look at appliances, but was already on the defensive. And sure enough, one of those guys was making a beeline for me.
I gave him the “just looking” line, but that wasn’t good enough. He began peppering me with questions. “Have you been here before? Are you in the market for a refrigerator? Do you live in the area? Did you notice our new mattress department?” Just lots and lots of questions. Two minutes in, and I was already regretting my huge lapse in judgment. I shoulda just stayed away.
Eventually, though, my new friend told me he was going allow me to look around. I appreciated his generosity, and wandered over to the TV section. They have a metric shitload of televisions there, and pretty good prices from what I could tell.
Then I noticed movement in my peripheral vision…. He was back! “Looking for a TV?” he asked. I couldn’t believe it. There was roughly 30 seconds between him walking away, and his return. I told him I wasn’t going to buy anything today, and was just looking around.
He’d clearly been coached to ignore such statements, and started telling me about Sharp brand televisions. He said Sharp is considered low-end, but makes surprisingly good TVs. They’re the way to go, if you’re on a budget, he assured me.
WTF? I just wanted to check out the store, and see what they have to offer. I told him I wasn’t interested in buying a TV, or anything else. But he was pitching TVs to me, anyway, like a man entered in a pitching contest. He wouldn’t leave me alone.
So, I started heading toward the door, as this dude continued talking and walking with me. I started to get concerned that he’d follow me to my car, and try to climb into the passenger seat. How would I explain it to Toney when I brought home a hyper-aggressive appliance salesman?
But he finally stopped walking, and I was able to put some distance between us. Sheesh. I’m sure they have some things in there that would interest me: TVs, computers, stereo systems… But I’ll most likely never return. That kind of shit is aggravating, so they’ve lost me, forever. Oh well.
For a Question, I’d like to know what are the most obnoxious stores you’ve encountered? Also, please tell us about the most aggressive salesmen you’ve met. Did you end up buying anything from him? Or did you tell him to ram it? We’ll need to know the details.
I’m also curious about working on commission. Or for tips. I’ve never done either, and am sympathetic — to a point. Have you done it? Were you trained in the art of annoying people straight out the front door? What was your experience?
And I need to go now. I’ll see you guys next time.
Have yourselves a great day!
Now playing in the bunker
Follow the Surf Report at Facebook!
Yep.
I get that kind of help when I don’t want it and can’t find a fucking soul when I do.
Fuck salesmen, on commission or not.
Raymour & Flanigan (chain of furniture stores) is the worst for latch-on salespeople (just like HH Gregg, apparently). One time I went into one just to look around, no intention of buying anything, and I told that to the salesman who greeted me at the door. But he insisted on following me around. Eventually I got irritated, and told him angrily that I was just looking, and was not going to buy anything. So he gave me maybe 20 feet of space between the two of us, but continued to follow me wherever I went. Finally I just glared at him and headed straight to the door.
I was a comissioned rep for a long time in the corporate environment. I had a quota and a very generous-if-you-perform compensation structure.
Bonuses could go into 5 figures quarterly if you were good at your job. A couple of lucky reps were getting 6 figure commission checks for a couple of years. One of my co-wokers won a BMW and another a Mini-Cooper in a sales contest.
Several became millionaires through stock options. Trips,corporate swag, parties, suite tickets to just about anything were lots of fun.
However, lots of people who couldn’t hack it found themselves on the streets pretty quick.
There were 30 people in my group when I started. I hung on for 5 years at the last place and when I left they were down to 5 people.
I left because I just wasn’t consistant enough and was tired of the pressure. It’s the ultimate hamster wheel of death.
Your managers can track your performance to two decimals and every month you start at zero agan. Miss your targets by more than 10-15% for any 3 month period and you’re gone.
Now I’m an RN doing critical care one of the countrys’ toughest trauma centers. If I’m workng on someone it means they’re doing their best to check out.
This is the least stressfull job I’ve ever had. No joke. This is just life and death. Sales, well, that shit is serious.
AMEN!
We used to have a place here called Sun TV. A wave of polyester-clad forty-somethings and stale cigarette smoke would hit you the minute you walked in the door. They were more agressive than car salesmen. I walked out of there plenty of times with nothing because I don’t like being pressured to buy anything–especially a big-ticket item.
Then they would start with all that “extended warranty” crap! No, I don’t think these $20 headphones need an extended warranty…
On the other hand, when we were ready to buy a new car, we went to a local dealership, milled around for about 20 minutes and not one soul came out to see if we were dead or alive! I absolutely could not believe it. Maybe we looked ‘poor’ or something!
I had not been in the FYE at the mall in many years until recently. There were four people working. All the better to follow you around I guess.
At the checkout, they kept trying to get me to buy a warranty in case the cd I was buying broke, two new movies on dvd, and of course some sort of member ship card. They also tried to get me to give them my email address.
I am not use that sort of thing. That is one reason I like Walmart – no one bugs you.
Big Sandy Superstores, Ashley Furniture Gallery, and Value City Furniture. One does not simply shop for furniture without the companionship of a pushy salesperson. Good god. You’re not permitted to just look at the merchandise, you have to be given a 30 minute presentation on the merchandise.
Heh…Value City. We had a guy stalk us at the end of every aisle after practically assaulting us at the door. We just started playing hide-and-seek with him. He must’ve walked for miles that day following us! We strung him along for about an hour! I was fairly entertained.
Most recent annoying sales person was this weekend at the Vans store. They had nothing new and interesting, and naturally, they never have pink sparkly ones in men’s 12. This little Asian girl figured she wasn’t selling to me, so she start waving $60 Spiderman shoes under my 4 yr old’s nose. That’s bad enough with a normal kid, but my son ride’s the short bus. “No” is a tough row to hoe.
Anyway, this sales girl tries one last effort towards me and shows me black/white checkered Vans…. touting them as “classics”. I told her I had a pair of those in 1981. Yeah. She was born in 1995. You thought I farted with the look she gave me.
I used to have all sorts of encounters with sales people.
That is, until I came up with the most awesome plan. Ever since I devised this detailed and elaborate response to pushy sales people, I haven’t been approached bya any pushy sales people.
Here’s my plan. When the sales person comes over asking if they can help, or whatever, I tell them that they can help me find what I’m looking for if they show me their tits/balls.
I think it would work out pretty good.
vegas time share sales people eat their young.
This was either fall of 1997 or 1998. Lincoln just came out with the Navigator and my employer had just introduced a new car plan that would pay $600 per month towards the 36 month car lease instead of 40 cents per mile for driving your own car or whatever it was back then.
One beautiful black Navigator arrived at the local dealer and they had it all spit shined sitting in the show room. I went in there and requested a test drive (there was a sloppy snow storm happening that day) and the salesman basically told me to get lost.
Went back the next day and asked an older sales guy for a test drive. He got the keys, pulled it outside, and I drove this beast and loved it. We sat down and negotiated a 36 month lease for $737 per month.
A few days later, I went to pick up the vehicle and the first guy was responsible to have me sign some papers, show me how some options worked, and all that stuff since the older guy who got the sale was off that day.
Needless to say, I treated that guy pretty shitty. He remembered me and hung his head and would not look me in the eye.
I’m in sales & Thank jebus I don’t work off commission. We do get quarterly bonuses that reflect our sales, but fuk dat! I am selling parks that people need already. I “up sell” alot of them, but at the same time, I am giving them a NICE discount on the part they came in for (cuz I don’t work on commission) so it’s almost like they are getting something free, because they usually have a set amount of money they are willing to spend.
Maybe I go to the “right” stores, or maybe I have that abrasive look about me (last weeks related question) that scares people away at pushy stores.
Havn’t had pushy since college days when us communications tech guys would go browsing/trolling the nearby discount radio/tv/stereo establishments.
Alex.
Btw……it’s real spring here in Atlanta…..until summer starts next week!
I’m a salesperson currently, and I have been for 15 years. I work at a piano store where I sell, you guessed it… pianos.
I can tell you what the pushy thing is all about. Most sales floors work on an “up” system, meaning that the salespeople take turns talking to customers who walk in. On a slow day, and if there are a lot of salepeople milling around that day, a salesperson might only get a handful of “ups”, and those walk-ins are the only opportunity that saleperson has to make money that day, especially if they are on straight commission. In some places, it doesn’t matter what the customer says about not buying, or only looking… they are still your “up”, and you either sell them or you don’t. If you don’t sell them anything, not only do you not make money and lose a turn, but your closing ratio goes down. This magical number, the closing ratio, is a big deal to employers, and is one of the major stats that they use to determine the worth of an employee.
Now, I’m not condoning pushiness. It’s normally a trait found in salespeople who are somewhat new to the game. They haven’t yet learned about boundaries, and how to give customers space while still being available to answer questions.
When someone tells me they are just looking, I’m fine with that and let them go. I tell them where my desk is, and say that I’m available if they have questions, and they almost always do.. mainly because most people don’t know shit from shinola when it comes to pianos. However, I’m lucky enough to work for a company where looky-lou’s are not considered “ups”. It doesn’t always work like that. What really chaps my ass, as a salesman, is the opposite situation, in which a customer who doesn’t intend to buy anything puts on a big act as though they are. This happens a lot more than you would think, and the motivation for this behavior can be any number of things, including some bizarre need for attention, or in some cases, they might think that I will ignore them if I know they don’t intend to buy. I’d rather they just be honest with me, because I’d be happy to answer all of their questions, even if they are just looking. And they way they aren’t burning my “up”.
When I come across a pushy salesperson, I tend to blame the management of the store, rather than the poor salesman who is trained to ABC (always be closing), and who is basically penalized when they don’t sell something.
I have never set foot in an H.H. Smegg, and I don’t intend to. (They are indeed Circuit City alumni BTW.) The junk mail they send me reeks of high pressure sales, and I just don’t need that.
The salespeople at Micro Center are not exactly pushy, but they would dearly love to put a sticker on whatever you’re buying – I think it’s some sort of commission tracking thing. I’m not sure how much they make on my $4 keyboard, but they’re welcome to it.
.
Did you make a Red Dwarf reference?
Of course. It seemed like the Thing to Do.
.
Things To Do: Buy milk. Pay papers. Invade Czechoslovakia.
But really, who can ever complete everything on their to-do list? It’s aspirational, right?
.
<3
We just remodeled our kitchen and bought an oven, dishwasher and microwave at hhGregg. Mainly because someone would actually help us. The sales people at Home Depot were less than thrilled to give us any input. Lowes had what we wanted, sales guy was very helpful, but had nothing in stock. Everything was a 3 week wait. Ended up at hhGregg. Worked with a sales woman who went out of her way for us. I guess the other two places didn’t need our 5K.
The worst place for pushy sales people I’ve encountered was Victoria’s Secret. The very second you cross their threshold, those nebshit bitches are up your ass. And not just one…ALL of them. They’re all wearing their little headphones and microphones..God knows why…or who they’re communicating with. The store isn’t THAT big for cripes sake. The first sales girl should tell the others to back the fuck off because there’s nothing in the store that will fit the big titted blonde that just came in.
They are wearing the headphone/microphone set up because they Secretly want to work at McDonald’s and EAT something…anything. Those bitches all need a Supersize fries and shake.
I hate to disagree about CC but I miss them. I never had a problem there unlike their surviving competitor which only seems to hire misogynistic A-holes.
2002 I (a girl) bought a rear projection TV from a specialty TV store and later go to The Blue & Yellow signed store to look for a VCR with my son. We are looking at progressive VCRS and the sales douche saunters over and says “you don’t need those let me show you some less expensive ones” Me: “No I need progressive”
“You would only need one a progressive VCR if you had a big TV”
ME: “Like a Mitsubishi 50″ rear projection?”
BBG, “Yes but you don’t have one of those”
My son, “Actually she does.” (As we walk out)
2002
My husband’s friend is building him a new computer and I need a specific sound card with a specific type of connector (x # of pins) I take a print out from the BB web site to the store. The “sales person” keeps trying to tell me I don’t need that card I need a cheaper older one and that I can’t possibly need this new card.
Drive to CC, show them the page they walk me to the card and hand it to me no argument, no questions, no “Little lady” BS.
2004 I am shopping for a desk top same store different sales person
Me “Does this model have a removable / upgradeable video card”
BBD, “You don’t need a fast video card unless you are a gamer are you a gamer?”
Me, “No I am a web / graphic designer running photoshop and illustrator”
Me walking away
Needless to say I won’t go into one of those Big box stores on a bet.
I mostly buy computer stuff online, except for the odd $4 keyboard at Micro Center. I like newegg.com.
.
Way back, I read some management guru guide to success. When the author was in a store, and unable to get sales help he would stand in the aisle and simply start saying “help”. Louder and louder. And eventually someone always came. I tried this in Home Depot recently. And you know what? That shit works. Real well.
Funny you should mention pushy people. I’m taking Thursday off to ride up to Rhode Island to look at houses. Our neighbor has 2 houses there and, coincidentally, a Rhode Island real estate license. He is hot and heavy to sell us one particular house. But he’s getting to be an annoiying fucklet. First off, we haven’t even seen the goddamn thing yet. Secondly, it’s a particular style of house I cannot stand. (sorry to all you Raised Ranchers, but I really do hate that style). So I want to tell him to ease the fuck off for now and wait until Thursday. He called last night around 8:45 and I wanted to run down the street and dick punch him. This isn’t a shirt I’m buying. I can’t shove it in the back of a closet if I don’t like it. And I don’t want to hear “And you can turn around and sell it in a few years.” No – this is it. If this house doesn’t have 99% of what I’m looking for, there won’t be any sale.
I agree that it is upper managments fault that sales people are so pushy. I worked in retail at a “vitamin store” and you are expected to sell, sell, sell. They would train you and watch you to make sure you well selling add ons and membership cards to their store. You always had to sell their brand. If they bought a multi-vitamin you had to basically demand that they also buy fish oil and vitamin C and protein powder, oh and dont forget the membership card. My manager used to add the card on without even asking the people and hope they didnt notice. Even if you did a good job, in their opinion you can always do better. The sales people are just doing what they are told to do so they don’t lose their jobs.
The worst experiences I’ve had with sales people lately are in my local Sam’s Club. I used to love to wander around Sam’s Club looking at their giant vats of orange pumice hand cleaner and 5000 ft garden hoses, but no more. In the last year or so they’ve allowed these Direct TV (or Dish Network) people into the store. They have a permanent table set up right alongside one of the main aisles and you can’t walk past without getting accosted about how they can save you money on your cable//satellite. It’s annoying as hell. I’ve finally figured out how to blow them off. Tell them you have Verizon FIOS. They immediately shut up and tell you to have a nice day. They apparently can’t compete. Either that or Verizon ha a cease-and-desist out against them.
They also have these anoying little diva hipster chicks walking around with clear makeup bags full of cosmetics and other junk and they hunt you down like an animal to talk to you about it. Can’t I just peruse the Dyson Vaccum aisle in peace??? I mean, shit. I end up feeling like Pacman trying to avoid the ghosts, darting in and out of the aisles as they round the corner with their bags-o-shit. Half the time I end up leaving the store and realizing that I’ve forgotten several items due to all the diva-dodging and hipster-hiding. Honestly it pisses me off. I didn’t pay $40 a year to be innundated with sales pitches. Leave me the fuck alone.
I just tell ’em I’m HIV positive and they leave me alone.
I recall seeing a T-shirt for sale that read, “Ask me about my explosive diarrhea”. That might do the trick.
.