When we lived in Atlanta Toney and I went to a bar called Moe’s and Joe’s, every Saturday afternoon. We’d get there about four o’clock, and order a pitcher of Pabst Blue Ribbon, almost without fail. If you know Moe’s, you know it’s all about the Pabst; the place is a virtual shrine to PBR. Oh, they offer other beers, but it’s… not recommended.
Sometimes we’d also order food, but the pitcher was an automatic. And since we were so consistent, they eventually started bringing our beer without us having to ask. And I loved that. We were regulars, at one of the funkiest dive bars in the South. I considered it a great achievement. …Hello?
The night before I got married, I was in Moe’s with my brother, and possibly Steve. I can’t remember the details for some reason. And Toney and I hashed out all our big decisions there, over some see-through beer, and a basket of onion rings. I’m sure we decided to buy our first house, while seated in one of those dilapidated steel-spring-in-the-ass-cheek booths.
When we were regulars (hell yeah!), a very old black man was a waiter. His name was Horace, and he’d been working there since before the JFK assassination. And that’s not a joke. He was an Atlanta institution, and whenever you ordered a Pabst he’d say, “The finest!” Every time. Horace is, unfortunately, no longer with us.
And on the men’s room wall was this memorable bit of graffiti: “If you voted for Newt Gingrich you can’t shit here, because your asshole is in Washington.”
I loved that place, and as far as I can remember… it’s the only bar (or restaurant) where I achieved “regular” status. And I couldn’t have wished for a more perfect locale.
There’s a Chinese restaurant here, where the waitress knows what we’re going to order, before we order it. But she always confirms it, just in case. There’s no automatic bringing forth o’ the food. So, that’s close, but not quite the same. Right?
What about you? Have you ever risen to the heights of being a regular somewhere? Paul Westerberg wrote a song about it, many years ago, but it featured the line, “Am I the only one who feels ashamed?” Paul, Paul, Paul… I love you, man, but you’re way off on that one. Regularism is a high achievement. …Possibly.
I’m still not feeling so hot, so this is going to have to do it. When I got out of bed on Tuesday I could tell illness was on the horizon. And now it’s here. Oh well. It doesn’t happen very often, and this is just a bad cold. I’m sure I’ll live through it. And hopefully you won’t catch it, by reading my words?
Have a great day, boys and girls.
I’ll be back soon.