Sunday morning I had to hoist my heft off the dormancy platform at the obscene hour of 4 am. You know, because of work boolshit? And it was painful, my friends. But, the thing is… I believe the dreading of it is even worse than the actual doing of it. Know what I mean? I get all whipped up, and it dominates my thoughts for several days in advance. It practically ruins the days leading up to the event. I need in-patient counseling, it’s fairly clear at this point.
Indeed, I recorded the Monday episode of the podcast on Saturday evening and 4 am is the only thing on my mind. I’m in full anguish at that point. Check it out if you’re so inclined. I re-listened to it last night and it has some funny moments, I think. Here’s the summary:
In this one, I tell you about something I’m forced to endure four times per year, and how I have a difficult time rebounding from it. I’ll be feeling this crap deep into Tuesday! Needless to say, there are many barely-related jags along the way, including an impassioned tirade about similar complaints I’ve heard which I consider to be phony-baloney. I hope you enjoy it. Thanks for listening!
I’m thinking about joining a gym. Just for a one-hour per day walk on the treadmill. Nothing more… nothing less. There’s a Planet Fitness not too far from us — 4.3 miles according to Google — and it’s $10 per month. I might give it a shot. Yeah, yeah… I know I could go out and walk around the neighborhood for free. But it’s getting cold and snowy and icy, etc. In fact, it snowed here on both Friday and Saturday. What kind of fresh shit is that?? So, the weather is a perfect built-in excuse to “take a day off,” which morphs into a month, then seven years.
It’s difficult though, to successfully incorporate something new into your daily routine. Oh, it can be managed in the short term, but the universe has a way of maintaining the normal order of things. Am I wrong? How long does it take? How many months before it’s officially a part of the routine? Twelve? Eighteen? I’m not even sure that would be a safe distance from the swaddling riffle-ass status quo. I don’t know. We’ll see.
Planet Fitness is a Judgment Free Zone, remember. Except they spell it judgement, which I don’t appreciate. What is that, some kind of Euro crap? Or just a straight-up misspelling? I could look it up, but I’m lazy. …Wait a second, I just had a burst of energy and did a Google search. They started in New Hampshire. So, the way they spell judgment is highly problematic. I assumed they were Canadian or somesuch. Maybe I should re-think this whole thing?
Finally, for the Question of the Day… Has anybody ever made an offhand comment about your appearance, which probably meant next to nothing, that you have never forgotten? Maybe it even got into your brain, and made you self-conscious for years? I remember a kid named Eric telling me I had a “huge head” when we were in fourth or fifth grade. In fact, I remember exactly where we were standing when he said it. Ha! The same thing happened to Elaine on Seinfeld. I felt her pain. The thing is… I’m fairly sure I have a smallish head, like the gentleman above. But that comment left a mark, I’m telling you. Maybe it had something to do with my hair?
Do you have anything on this? Just some stupid comment that somebody made that you carry around with you to this day? If so, please tell us about it in the comments.
And I’m going to call it a day, my friends.
Please remember to use one of our Amazon links while you’re doing your holiday (or otherwise) shopping. There’s a good one in the sidebar, and a cuppa two tree underneath each update. Just click on through, and shop as normal. It’ll cost you nothing extra, and will help me a great deal. Thank you guys!
And by the way, the Now Playing album linked below came out on Friday and I can’t stop listening to it. It’s on full perma-repeat in the subterranean bunker.
I’ll be back on Thursday.
Have a great week!