I’m going to take some time away from the site, my friends. I’m struggling, and need to get a handle on things. I know that sounds kinda ball-baby bitch, and I apologize for abandoning ship. But things are out of control, and I don’t do well under such circumstances.
The latest:
A few days ago I was in the upstairs bathroom, getting ready for work, and smelled gas. WTS? There’s no gas in there — not that kind, anyway. I went downstairs, and also smelled it in the kitchen. Really strong.
We have an electric stove, so this was a confusing turn of events. And it didn’t smell like natural gas, anyway. It smelled like… propane. Yeah, that’s it! So, I walked out onto the slanted deck, and discovered the source. Man, it was just a catastrophic explosion waiting to happen out there.
I checked the grill, and it was turned off. But then I saw a big hole chewed into the hose that runs between the tank and the grill itself. Squirrels! One of those deceptively cute little assholes (I assume) chewed a hole in the hose, and the entire contents of the tank escaped. And it had been roughly 95% full.
Yeah, I know. I should’ve turned off the tank. And I should always put the cover on the grill after each use. I don’t need any lectures, goddammit. I realize it’s partly my fault. But what kind of crazy animal chews-up a propane hose? What’s the upside for them? I don’t get it.
So, that’s currently unusable. We cooked-out over the weekend, but used charcoal and our little camping grill. It’s emasculating. You should see this thing. I feel like I’m playing with an Easy-Bake Oven. Embarrassing.
Also (and this was the scariest event yet), my computer shit the bed. It wouldn’t boot-up, and I was convinced (convinced!) the hard drive was a goner. I kept getting the blue screen of death, with a message that terrified me. Holy shit! This could very well be the fatal blow.
My computer is about three years old, powerful as hell, and semi-expensive. I spend a lot of time in front of the thing, and splurged on a good one, last time ’round. And there’s no way in hell I could afford — at this point — to replace it. Plus, there’s so much important stuff stored on there. My right hand was WHIPPING through my hair.
This happened on Sunday, and I called a guy who was a bigwig in the IT department at my previous job. He’s helped me out of several jams in the past. But both numbers I had for him have been disconnected. Did he move? Hell if I know. I went on Facebook and tried to find him, but there was nothing. Who doesn’t have a Facebook page in 2011? Especially an IT dude? Grrr…
I started calling computer repair shops around here, and got answering machines. But one guy picked up, and told me the problem could be “no big deal,” something “really ugly,” or a few other things. Wow! This was some helpful information.
But he said I could bring it to him on Monday, the 4th of July, and he’d take a look at it. He asked me to take it to his house, not his shop, which seemed weird to me. But whatever.
So, on Monday morning I put the tower in the passenger seat, programmed this dude’s address into the GPS, and…. my car wouldn’t start. It was deader than Kelsey’s nuts. Seriously? Could this possibly be true? Was I being punk’d? I’ve never had an ounce of trouble with that car, and now this??
I was already running late, so I transferred all the shit to Toney’s car and took my computer to the guy’s house. I asked him to give me a receipt confirming he had my tower, which offended him a little, I think. But I had visions of him saying, in two or three days, “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’ve never seen you before in my life.”
While driving back to our house I felt like I might be on the cusp of a nervous breakdown. I was panicked, angry, and on the verge of tears, all at the same time. My whole world was crashing down around me. Here’s an up to date list of the things that have failed over the past few weeks:
the dishwasher
the lawnmower
the deck
the grill
my car
my computer
Netflix streaming (a small hiccup, as it turns out, but I freaking lost it)
my iPod (corrupted, and completely wiped clean… I haven’t even had the energy to investigate. Fuck it.)
the battery in my laptop (holds a charge for roughly four minutes, which doesn’t do me much good)
When I returned home we called AAA, and asked them to tow my car to the garage we always use. They said they’d be here in 45 minutes. And about an hour and fifteen minutes later a white pickup truck pulled into our driveway. Where’s the tow truck? What’s going on now??
Some surly and disagreeable bastard emerged, with a battery charger. He ordered me to release the hood, and connected the charger to the battery. Nothing happened. But he kept monkeying with it, and it finally fired up.
“I don’t know what’s wrong with it, but it’s running and you can drive yourself to the garage,” he said, before getting back in his truck and leaving. Nice. A real breath of fresh air.
The guy at the garage gave me an assessment similar to the one I received from the computer dude. It could be something easy and cheap, apocalyptic, or several things in between.
Toney followed me to the garage, and I asked if she wanted to go to Waffle House, after I finished describing my latest problem to the latest stranger. I needed to drown my sorrow in bacon grease…
And I could go on and on with this, but the computer problem is fixed. It cost me ninety dollars, and was something to do with corrupted memory. I consider it a bullet dodged. But the car is another matter. We got “good” news about it as well. They said the battery was dead, and that was my only problem. Whew! I can deal with a dead battery. I also considered this to be a bullet dodged. I was excited.
However, when we arrived to pick up my car, the hood was raised, in the middle of the parking lot. Uh oh. The guy said they put a new battery in it, but it appeared to be defective. It was doing the exact same thing it was doing for me, earlier in the day. He assured me it was just a bad battery, but I don’t have a warm and fuzzy feeling. I think they might have misdiagnosed the problem.
But, so far so good. I drove it all over carnation (as one of my aunts would put it) yesterday afternoon, and it started every time. So, maybe we’re OK? Yeah, I wouldn’t bet a whole lot of money on it.
So, you see… this is the way all of my so-called downtime has been used. And my downtime isn’t exactly plentiful. I’m working a ton of hours, because we need the money, so everything is just out of control right now.
I need to take a week, and at least one vacation day, and try to get a handle on things. I can’t live like this. I’m a wreck. Over the weekend Toney told me: “You know, sometimes you’re not an easy person to like.” I’m supposed to be happy about all this? I should be skipping through the park with a basket full of rose petals at this point?! Not an easy person to like? I feel like I’ve been remarkably restrained. I didn’t flip out like Jovis, or anything. Heck, I didn’t even have a beer.
I don’t know when I’ll update again, but it’ll probably be next Monday. No later than next Monday. I’m sorry, but I really need to regain control of my life.
By the way, I was supposed to be working on the Nancy update over the weekend. That didn’t happen, for obvious reasons, but I might squeeze it out during the week. We’ll see how it goes.
However, I do have some fresh Nancy news: somebody stole her purse on Sunday, and bought several thousand dollars worth of electronics with one of her credit cards. They have her driver’s license, her house and car keys, and all her cards. Sheesh. My blood pressure is ratcheting upward, just thinking about it.
So, there ya go. I’m going to go underground for a few days, but will be back soon. I appreciate you guys sticking with me. I’ll probably be on Twitter occasionally, but other than that… I’m taking a break.
I’ll see everyone in a few days.
Now playing in the bunker
Crossroads Road for your Kindle: just $2.99!
1st.
I hope things turn around for you Jeff.
Good Afternoon Surf Reporters…
a brand spanky new update makes my day.
Bummer, dude. Several bummers, actually. I fully support your stepping away for a bit. Just decompress and chill.
You selfish cocksucker.
unfortunately I have completely read said update and feel at a loss. Sorry to hear about your world turning to shite, JK.
Just remember we’ll all be waiting for you with open arms once you decide to come back.
Peace.
Good luck, man.
Do whatever you need to do. We understand and support you. Good luck with everything.
Take it easy brother, take all the time you need, maybe I’ll get caught up at work while you’re taking a break. Hope things start running smoother soon!
How about a group hug and a big “Poor Baby” for Jeff?
Or tell him to suck it up, don’t be such a Sally, and wash down a 2mg Xanax with a half a bottle of bourbon?
Squirrels????? Shit, Jeff, if you guys have squirrells back there, then there is no in hell that I am going to send my daughter to the college in Clark’s Summit PA! 🙂
Thanks for big timing us Mr Fancy Author
Damn, I think we all need to buy Jeff an O’Douls, Sharps or at least a Coors Cutter or two.
Fuck that.
The man needs real beer.
Hang in there Jeff. You may want to reconsider beer’s mellowing agents.
HOLY SHYTE, Jeff.
You need a day or two in the Yurt Colony. Things will get better.
HOLY FUCKLEBUGS! Casey Anthony NOT GUILTY???
Ahhhh, reasonable doubt…
am I right, people?
As to Jeff- Wow shitburgers.
Drink vodka immediatelynow if not sooner.
That’s the responsible thing to do…
I have to say, I’m pretty sure she did it, or had something to do with it (her parents give me the full on CREEP FUCKLEBUG SHIVERS)–I didn’t want to admit it and I doubt this will be a popular comment but there was reasonable doubt, the way it’s written in law.
Hopefully she gets hit by a bus leaving the court house.
Don’t worry, she’ll catch 47 STDs within a few months, happily human pole dancing her way to death’s door. Her final months will be spent as a wispy, drunken wastrel, having penile nightmares and dry heaving in a pond of her own pisspoop.
Not that I harbor ill will, or anything.
You have to have a driver’s license, or a hunting license, but not a parent license. Fuck her.
I just hope she’s haunted into an early grave.
If she does go to prison, I hope someone in the stoney lonesome can employ some “prison justice!!!”
It’s sad to see people literally get away with murder in America. I am ashamed of our justice system when 12 people are too stupid to figure it out!
What can possibly become of this nation when a child’s life means so little?
She’s not going to prison. She gonna walk today. I’m still scratching my head over the fact that no one reporting that baby missing for 31 days. That has guilt written all over it. I just don’t get it. I know the jury is told to take “all emotion” out of the equation, but holy shit…this is just common sense.
Damn! Everything always takes a shit at once. Hope it turns around for you, Jeff. We’ll be here waiting for you when you feel up to updating again.
Happy Tuesday, Surfers!
Jeff,
Hang in there, bro. Take a break. Just make sure to come back.
SCOTT,
“Thanks for big timing us Mr Fancy Author” has to be the meanest, most ungrateful, and flat out FUNNIEST thing I have read all day!
Christian
Sorry for your string of bad luck. Take some time to decompress & we’ll be here when you return.
Hang in there and take all the time you need. We’ll be here when you get back. You know we will. We have no lives.
P.S. I REALLY wish Nancy’s thief had purchased a bunch of freshly slaughtered veal, a couple of mink coats, and a Hummer.
Or at least a few hundred gift boxes from “Omaha Beef”
mmmmmm…Omaha Steaks. Ever try those little apple tartlets? Great.
heh – i said tartlet.
Gosh, Jeff. When it rains, it doesn’t just pour, it DUMPS. I give you credit, though. I think you’ve held up rather well. I would be under my computer desk in the bunker sucking my thumb. Like you, I don’t handle that type of stress well. It’s actually getting worse as I get older.
Yeah…Casey Anthony NOT guilty. What? The glove didn’t fit??
Hang in there Jeff, it could be worse. T-storm might tell you you are getting all weepy-shmeepy.
Have a great break, Jeff. We’ll all be here when you’re ready to return.
Re: Casey Anthony- Jury of her peers- Pinellas County Florida. They’ve all done a little of this and a little of that. I expected this and hope she finds the “real killer” at the bar. Fucking whore.
…meh…
….fucking computer….
Anyway…
We’ll be here when you let the air out. Just like a good solid STD, you can’t get rid of us.
Maybe while Jeff is taking a break, we can hear everyone’s goings-on over the 4th?
Saw some fireworks Friday night. Saturday, I went to the most depressing carnival ever. It was a beautiful day and we expected lots of fun. What we got instead were some burly “carny” folks who had been standing around with their thumbs up their butts for over a week. I think there may have been TOPS 40 people on the fair grounds. They were BEGGING us to play some games. We left after 20 minutes. EVen the rides looked gloomy.
Sunday it rained so I cleaned the garage. Monday did a few errands and slammed down a rack of ribs and watched via TV the Macy’s fireworks. One day, I swear I’ll see them live.
madz: Thanks for getting the ball(s) rolling!
Saturday we went to the Kenny Chesney concert at Heinz Field. Not that I am a KC fan, but the Zac Brown Band was one of the opening acts and he is one of my very faves. The concert was fantastic. Zac and the boys didn’t disappoint. But I will have reservations on going ever again.
First…the fucking HEAT was so bad I was getting nauseated later in the day. Got there about 1PM. Some of these asshats were already passed out from drinking in the heat and NEVER made it into the concert. Idiots. Young/drunk hicks and hicklets everywhere. The parking lots were completely covered in urine and garbage. It was pityful. Tailgating at a Steeler game isn’t ever that out of hand.
It was a very long day…the concert didn’t start til 4:30 and was over around 11 or so.
Our seats were on the field. Forget it. When Kenny came on everyone STOOD on the folding chairs. Funk dat. I was pissed. We stood the entire time behind the seats on the field. I wasn’t balancing myself on those chairs and it was 50 degrees hotter within the crowd. Jeezus!! By the end of the show, my feet and legs hurt so bad I could have cried and did when I got home when I took my boots off. And God help me…Jamboree in the Hills is next week.
Monday we went to the Pirates game at PNC park which is always a treat. That stadium is fantastic and the Bucs are actually doing well is an added boner.
Since the game was early and over at 4:30, we didn’t stick around til 9:30 for fireworks. Been there, done that. 20 minutes of boomers for 60 minutes of traffic. No thanks.
Peter Frampton was playing at UConn and they still had lawn seats left (probably under a friggin Yucca tree or over a hill) so we passed. After the fireworks, I went home and played X Box bowling while sipping some chilled wine.
Frampton filed for divorce. He won’t be a Cincinnatian anymore.
food
beer
coma
beer
Usual day.
I took Friday off. I spent the next several days having “highballs” and waking up in strange places in various stages of dress. By Sunday I was in the yard wearing nothing but business socks.
Some crazy fuck we know went to Tennessee to get fireworks that you’re supposed to be licensed for. Me and him took a pontoon boat into the lake and shot them off. A good time was had by all.
We smoked a 20 pound brisket on Sunday / Monday, and that was fucking great. Caught a local minor league baseball game. Today I’m back at work.
Went with my buddy’s wife to a sex toy store, because she didn’t want to go alone. That’s a long story, but it was weird. I couldn’t help but look at what she was buying and thinking, “THAT’S going to be inside her? Holy shit!” Anyway, good times babies, good times.
Still waiting for a picture of bikerchick though.
Did your business socks have gold toes?
That would be fuckin weird.
The exact kind of business socks I had on are as pictured here:
http://nippleworks.blogspot.com/2009/09/business-socks.html
All of my socks have writing on them. I like to send a message with my socks. I figure, why waste the space, ya know?
I see.
I was not familiar.
Not to put any extra pressure on you, but this changes things for me.
That puts immense pressure on me. I want people to like my socks.
Duuuuude- I like your socks more than I like MY socks! And I’m extremely proud and even passionate about my socks!!
But your socks say so much more.
Mine are ribbed, though.
For her pleasure, no doubt.
What’s so weird about gold toe socks? Except for the fact that they’re ribbed.
http://www.macys.com/catalog/product/index.ognc?ID=458856&cm_mmc=Google_Feed-_-5-_-58-_-MP558
Nothing, nothing.
Everything I wear is ribbed.
We went to NY over the 4th of July weekend, and it was hot as shit too. I didn’t even drink the whole weekend, and I wanted to barf most of the time because I was SO FUCKING HOT and irritated. We went camping for a 3 day Phish fest, and these assholes that run these things always put everyone in a fucking field instead of an actual forest or somewhere where it’s acceptable to camp. Friday I was so hot, miserable and tired that I missed the first night of shows to go back to the tent and sleep. Saturday was good (because I got so much sleep), but then Sunday it rained in the morning and then the sun came out and started burning us alive again, so I laid in the back seat of Ben’s car in the A/C and slept for 2 hours. Fuck heat and fuck summer. I only like summer at night. This was the last fest where we are tent camping…we finally invested into a camper with A/C so we can sleep at shows past 7am or whenever the sun starts hot boxing you in your tent. Fuck, I get mad just thinking about it. My car is still fucked by the way. We replaced 2 sensors in it and the asshole still isn’t running right. So we ended up taking Ben’s Jetta to NY instead and when we got back, the thing didn’t have any oil in it because the retards at the place where he gets his oil changes didn’t tighten the oil cap so it all leaked out.
JK; at least you still have us….
Oh God, LHR…..knowing that he’ll though himself onto the Schuylkill Expressway at rush hour.
“through” (???). Ugh. I meant “throw”. It’s. The. Heat. From Saturday. You know. The concert. Sweltering. Hot. Mess.
Yeah, I’m not sure I’d tell him that in his delicate state of mind…
“Yeah, Joe, ya still have us!”- Joe’s Apartment
Hang in there Jeff, I am with Henderson, a little xanax goes a loooong way-and when you’re not freaking out about everything, it all falls back into place (usually in a good way). Some words of comfort? “You’re such a nice person to hang around with when you’re happy”. Thanks Mom, really?
Jeff…get well soon. We’re all pullin’ for ya.
That whole Anthony family creeps me the hell out. I can’t believe that little rip might walk free come Thursday.
Jeff,
I just bought you a “Case of Yuengling Lager”. I’m not one for encouraging habits, or whatever, but for fucksake, this is getting absurd. Some beer might do you good.
I’ll be taking a break of my own. I have a “chest cold”, or, as they used to call it in the 17th century, three days to live.
And that pretty little cunt Casey Anthony got a slap on the wrist this morning. So I plan to go to Florida to see if I can catch her in a bar and help her drink her blues away.
Shit day. Just an all around shit day.
Aw crud. 🙁 Good luck with rebooting your life!
On a side note, Nancy’s thief is gonna be in for one hell of a surprise when he eventually gets around to “breaking and entering” that funhouse.
Cripes – we have an attorney in from Spain (he did a 2 year stint here a few years ago) and he came up to me and did that European kiss kiss thing aan I stiffened up like an ironing board. I’m so socially inept when it comes to shit like that.
I seem to remember you’re a female, but you might want that clarification next time you say “I stiffened up like an ironing board” after a dude kisses you. At least around here, where the Snark runs strong through us. 😉
LMAO – you’re so right.
Yes, I am a female – and no, i didn’t get a stiffy. Not THAT way anyway.
Jeff, get an EDIt button.
A deluge!
I’m in IT, fuck facebook.
As for estimates, its true, it could be something stupid easy, or all doom and gloom. Welcome to the world of electronics, its impossible to give an honest middle of the road answer. The honest answer really does cover best to worst case.
Actually, sounds like you got a halfway decent fix-it guy. He wanted it at his house cause the store is closed and he didn’t want to unlock. Can’t blame him for wanting to stay home for the holiday, but still willing to do some work.
I went to work on the 4th.
Hang in there Jeff, we’ll all be here waiting, like stalkers!!
I have this great mental picture of adolescent squirrels huffing your propane. BTW, that wouldn’t have happened if you’d used a Blizzak gas pipe.
I’m an “IT guy” and I don’t have a FaceBook page. Obviously I’ve had one in the past, but this decade? No.
Hang in there 🙂
I just lost it with that mental picture…friggin’ hilarious squirrels huffing propane.
I’ll throw in my shit so AWG can call me names.
Totalled my car Saturday morning rear ending someone. I have pictures if anyone wants to see.
Found out the same day my girlfriend is seeing/banging someone else. Technically we broke up 2 weeks ago but after 2.5 yrs it’s never exactly over after 2 weeks. Plus we were/are still living together, and banging.
Here’s where I’m really a ball baby bitch.
I basically told her I want her back and don’t want to lose here and what not. Honestly it was my drinking that drove her away (More like how much I drank and how I acted toward her during said drinking).
I’m not mad she found someone else, I’m mad she lied to me about it and went behind my back (Was trying to spare my feelings, why are people so delusional). He hit on her while he was still dating his girlfriend, the whole thing is a mess.
Not as bad as my entire world falling apart like Jeff, but still a shitty weekend.
Jeff I hope it gets better. I guess just start prioritizing and/or take care of the cheaper things first so you can whittle it down.
On the up side, isn’t totaling an Echo financially akin to dropping a half gallon of week old milk.
Yes. I bought the car 2 yrs ago for 3700 it’s currently 10 yrs old with like 162K miles. It was a good car but I’m not tooooo broken up about it. Just the other shit I have to deal with now.
OK… on the up side, at least you got to bang *something* from behind this weekend.
OH YEAH – chik – chickah (Day bow bow)
t-storm: Sorry to hear you’re on the downswing too (well, if you’re rear-ending, technically you’re on the upswing..but whatever). My boyfriend’s drinking nearly destroyed us. The drinking and the torment that followed was heaped on me. It’s better now, but took a few years of fights and tears, threats and ultimatums. He doesn’t have a drinking problem…he’s a problem drinker. The party never ends for him when we’re out. There is no such thing as stopping after work for “one”. So it’s avoided all together. I feel your pain….and hers.
Now, on the lighter side…. A porno lesson: It’s NOT “chik – chickah (Day bow bow). It’s: “brown chicken brown cow”…. Your welcome.
I’m probably more a problem drinker. I don’t mind not drinking, I’m being real cagey about it right now, but I have a problem with the just one after work.
Honestly at home I don’t drink much at all. But out in public I can put them away like nobody’s business and I generally don’t seem too bad until that one corner gets turned.
Your situation sounds very similar to mine. We’ve been trying really hard to fix what’s wrong and I’m finally on board so it should be better. Stupid wake up calls.
That’s my boyfriend’s problem. Like Lay’s Potato Chips…can’t eat just one. And it once he’s 3 beers in, it’s hard to pull him back. He knows this too. Like you, he doesn’t care about not drinking, but boy when he does….. Summertime is the worst since we’re out more. But he has responsibility with me on the back of that bike. So he has really cut back. At first, there were times I don’t know how he made it home on two wheels. Scares the shit out of me. Not to mention, he would lose his job if he got a DUI…especially if he were in his work truck. They have a zero tolerance policy to this shit. And should. So he has wakened up quite a bit.
No, I get it. T-Storm be keepin’ it vintage with Buehler? Buehler? Buehler? Buehler? ‘chick chickaaaaaaaaaa…..day bow bow’ incidental/something clever was said/happened’ music. Prons music is ‘brown chicken brown cow’. Then Rod Jeremy comes on and everything turns all hairy.
You are welcome.
tinypic.com for a simple no login picture hosting site if you don’t want to divulge your personal picture folder stash.
Thanks, Alex. I’ll try that tonight when I get home. I can’t seem to get my photo’s to upload/download…wtfever.
I actually do want to see these. If you have a facebook, give me your name so I can be your facebook friend. That way, we will offically be friends because facebook said so.
Jesus Christ,
So me and the girl were working things out, I’ve cut back on the drinking (None since Saturday and had a redbull only at a comedy show last night).
So after comedy I go back into work to finish some bullshit and I get a text
“Don’t respond. I’m not home. I can’t be with you.”
What the what? So needless to say after a few days of what I thought was a pretty decent reboot of our relationship I get this message at 1:17 in the AM.
I was a little shaken. When I finally got home at 2 she was gone but her cat was still there so she wasn’t gone for good. I dealt with it by listening to Decoration Day and hanging the pictures I’d just had framed.
Today she calls and tells me she freaked out because she didn’t expect that I would change and she’s not sure how to deal with our relationship without the chaos.
Damned if I do, damned if I don’t.
Sorry, man. People are really weird to deal with sometimes. Keep your chin up…lotta fish in the sea as they say. Do they say that?
lol squirrels. what do they get out fo it? Well, not muc, directly. dont forget that most woodland animals don’t have TV (because they don’t earn much)… so getting high off eating things like rubber, smelling gas and watching you fretting is comparritively a good night out
Take 5, we’ll still be lurking about.
Some of you guys were talking about the movie “Everything is Illuminated” the other day so I downloaded it and watched it. WTF man? I didn’t understand key parts of it. Was blind grandpa having flashbacks to being a former Nazi? Did he kill the Jew guy’s relative? Where the he’ll did the old lady living in the sunflower field fit in? Was she the Jew boy’s aunt? Why did blind gramps off himself?
I need some goddamn answers on this “Everything is Iluminated” movie. It’s been driving me nuts. uncle_wedgie and Sidney spoke of it. So I rented it. Now I feel like I’ve been kicked in the plums.
Didn’t read the article cause quite frankly I don’t care but I love you like a brother Jason so maybe this will shed some light on it.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Everything_Is_Illuminated_(film)
Thanks WB. That helps some.
Jason,
The grandfather was one of the Jews they shot but he survived to become an anti Jew. The lady in the sunflowers was the girl that found the bodies and was there when he came to. She was also the boy’s great aunt.
On the upside, Jeff, it can only get better! We’ll be here when you recoup!
Holy Shit, man. Sounds an awful lot like a mexican woman made a little stick man, chopped off a chicken head and said some ‘booga booga boogas” in your general direction. Put the hoodoo on your ass.
Small animals will eat rubber hoses if given the opportunity. Out in the garage sits my ’73 Ford Ranchero that got a hole chewed in the fuel line right at the carburetor few years ago. I started it, and the gas fumes got under the distributor cap and blew the damn cap off, setting the top of the engine on fire. Shorted out the ignition module in the high tech distributor and scorched the hood, and I never have got around to getting it running again.
I worked all weekend, as my week starts on Friday night at 11 and goes on from there, and I figured i might as well just work the holiday because the whole drinking and fireworks thing don’t do much for me anymore. Especially since I quit drinking over 20 years ago. And as far as the “who doesn’t have a facebook page?”, I have one somewhere because the wife wanted to check out something on her daughter’s page once years ago, but I don’t remember ever actually having anything to do with it. Just doesn’t seem like anything I can’t live without.
Jeff–take some time off, recharge, relax and just get your stuff taken care of, we’re fine by ourselves, all us lunatics running the asylum.
None of my former employer’s IT guys are on facebook, probably because the three that I interacted with on a monthly basis were all paranoid the government was tapping into “their” servers. Thank God all IT guys aren’t insane, because without #4 (the normal IT guy) I’d have made one black helicopter joke too many and they’d have never come back to my location again.
As for my weekend, it was filled with semi-pro fireworks shows at various family friends’ houses. Good times, and I got to see 4 guys on one four wheeler do a wheelie for probably a hundred feet. Pretty friggin awesome.
Also RE: Casey Anthony…that whole trial was one of the biggest battles of idiots I had ever seen. Her lawyer was a grade A moron, but the prosecutors that decided to try a case on that little, poor quality evidence? Really? It must not be an election year for prosecutors in Orange County, because they got beat by literally one of the shadiest, shittiest lawyers in Orlando. Check out the guy’s record…he couldn’t get into the bar in FL for 8 years for nonpayment of child support and health insurance for his daughter. The jury did their job correctly though–they cut through the media bullshit and focused on the evidence they were presented. It didn’t turn out the way everyone thought it should because the prosecutor didn’t have any REAL evidence. No witnesses, no official cause of death, no murder weapon and nothing that wasn’t just circumstantial evidence–nothing beyond a reasonable doubt. Just a poor showing by the legal community there.
Only one place did I read it: The jury does not determine guilt OR innocence, they determine guilt, or the failure of prosecution to make a solid case.
Every other talking head seems to be hung up on the fact that the jury didn’t convict a guilty woman. They seem to gloss over the point of prosecution failing.
Jeff Kay = Certified PUSSY
Jeff, if your car is still the Camry, take heart–it’s just the battery. Toyotas will run forever, so consider that problem solved!
My Sienna had the original battery from the factory for 8 years and it’s about the only thing I’ve had to replace on it (except tires and brakes.)
Now if Toyota only made dishwashers, lawn mowers and propane hoses we’d be all set!
While we’re on a little break, I need some advice from anyone who knows about DSLR Camera’s. The “point and shoot” digital I have now just doesn’t have the macro and spot focus I need to photograph jewelry. I am losing my mind with this thing. Any suggestions for something reasonably priced?
Next question….for the IT guys. My 5/6 year old Dell computer has slowed down to a crawl. I might as well dial up any website. Need a new computer for my website, downloading photo’s, etc… I do not need a monitor. Just computer. It was suggested to me to get a Dell 380 Optiplex. Suggestions?
Thanks guy!! xo
“guys”!!
Canon Rebel T3:
http://www.cameralabs.com/reviews/Canon_EOS_Rebel_T3_1100D/
I just like Canon cameras.
The Dell you mentioned would be fine.
Oh…the Canon is about $495…lotta bang for the buck.
I’ve always had good luck with Dell desktops – I’m typing this on one now. I think you should be OK with the Dell 380.
The standard uber-geek response to the slowness issue would be “oh, but you’re running Windows, aren’t you? I never have such problems with [BSD, Slackware, whatever].” Snotty though it may be, there’s some truth to it. Assuming you *are* running Windows, a short-term fix might be to wipe the disk and reinstall – it’s amazing how much garbage accumulates over time on even a well-maintained and properly secured Windows system. Then again I’m not an IT guy so much as a programmer, so what the hell do I know.
I like my Canon S5 IS, but it’s not an SLR. It has a macro mode, but it still has a little trouble with closeups like jewelry.
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Agree with the above, your PC is likely just full of crud. The MIL “needed a new PC” because her old one had ground to a halt, I’ve just cleaned all the crap off and returned a “new PC” to her, it’s flying along now.
Do you want to install animated dancing singing handbags desktop? Yes/No. Yes, apparently.
It’s like needing to buy a new fridge because your current one is stuffed full of year old leftovers. It just needs a clean out :).
I did a defrag. It took over night to complete. I emptied the recycle bin as well. It’s still running very slow. It takes several minutes for my home page to fully load. And to down load a photo is even worse. I hate to spend the money on a new computer if I can clean this one out. But then again, if it’s only giving me a few months I might as well just bite the bullet.
i would say you have a trojan or a virus. slow internet is kind of a giveaway. if i was much closer i would look at it for you.
A defrag won’t help much – that mainly pertains to efficient use of disk space. I’ll agree with Chuck in Belpre that you probably have some sort of malware, possibly involving bogus registry entries that are hard to recognize, which is why I suggested a reinstall. Always assuming you have good backups. I seem to recall ranting about backups a few weeks ago. You have nothing on that machine that you can’t afford to lose, right? If you do, get it onto some other media ASAP.
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A virus. Figures. Any way to clean it up or not worth it?
Chuck & Chill: Thank you so much. Chuck, I bought that camera. You are the second person to recommend that camera. The reviews looked good and since I am a novice, it looks fairly simple.
BC…
I have had very good results with this:
http://www.superantispyware.com/
Download the FREE version and install it. Re-start your computer in SAFE MODE and run the program you just installed. I’ll assume you know how to do that. Make sure you check for any updates to the program. Do a FULL scan. Start it and walk away…it takes some time. Just read the screens…it’s easy to use.
Chuck: I’ll give it a try. Thank you so much! I’d buy you guys a shot and a beer (or a cuppa two tree) if I could!
download malwarebytes. I am sure it will find whatever form of computer gleep you have caught. I am a pro and it is what I mostly use. Also use Security Essentials from Microsoft. Both are free and do a great job. Make sure to uninstall any other antivirus you are using.
http://download.cnet.com/Malwarebytes-Anti-Malware/3000-8022_4-10804572.html
http://www.microsoft.com/Security_Essentials
I don’t need no stinking moderation!
Thanks, Unc!
uncle_wedgie: Come to think of it…the last time I tried the Malwarebytes “free” download, after the scanning/diagnosing process, it wouldn’t do anything else until I purchased it.
Make sure you use the link I posted. There are other site offering :antimalwarebytes” which can be trojans. The real program is Malwarebytes and it is free.
thanks Chuck and Unc, I used those last night and it seems to run a tad faster.. i use CCleaner and Defraggler too. i have a 4 year old dell laptop and its still going good.
Maybe a hot water bottle on your vagina would make it feel better.
Nancy’s card thief should have joined the NRA and given a bunch of money to right wing causes.
Hot water bottle always worked for me.
Too hot right now for hot water bottles. I hate being hot. Give me ice.. freeze the ol’ cat.
The heat and humidity are killing me, too. I feel bad for people who work outside. I wouldn’t last and someone would just come by and squeegie me off the road.
My boyfriend works in this shit. He in an open field on a gas well site. And get this…he has to wear fire retardent clothing…that means heavy long sleeved shirts and jeans and a hard hat. Phuck dat!!!! He comes home everyday soaking wet from sweat and absolutely exhausted. I don’t know how he does it. He said his balls look like raisin’s. And a bad case of swamp ass.
Oh man, the poor guy! My niece is a police officer in Greenwich Village and had some kind of silk undershirt on under her bullet proof vest under the uniform and was standing too close to a bus’ exhaust pipe and practically keeled over. Now she wears cotton – she has to wear something otherwise it’s pretty bad chafing.
“…freeze the old cat.” Heh. That reminds me…
If anybody runs into Jermel Simpkins, smack that bitch for me.
Owes me 5 dollars.
Also, I have to figure out the best way to polish my alabaster dolphin.
I ran into Cathy Smith and smacked her. I don’t know if she owes anyone any money, but it felt good.
OK…I musted have missed something.. Who the hell are Jermel Simpins and Cathy Smith?
Smith is just some idiot I know who deserves a daily ass whumping.
Oh shit! I know A LOT of idiots that deserve a daily dose of “Lump Me Up”.
Jermel Simpkins is a dude that very well could be, and probably is, imaginary. Because I made him up.
Had some free time, was in a weird mood, felt like somebody MUST owe me $5, started thinking (that’s where it always starts)…
and, voila, a perfectly nonsensical comment.
If I have inadvertantly caused any actual Jermels or Jermel Simpkins to be smacked in real life, good I’m glad fuck you life can be strange.
(Sorry for any confusion, bikerchick.)
But I meant that dolphin shit. I’ve been doing it all wrong and wonky and whatnot.
Well, damn! I was about to bitch about getting that “www.apple.com/support/iPod” dealy on my (ahem) 7 year old piece of crap, and then I read this. My damn! My little
“problem” has/have nothing on yours–take a chill beer (or two) and hopefully things will get better.
I think this says it all:
http://cwahart.com/images/oj&ca.jpg
What a sweet couple, they deserve each other!
I’m stealing that. Stolt!
My sister has an interview for a job on 7/20 – keep your fingers crossed – she’s been out of work a long time.
Jeff , why does Google still say the Mockable website may damage your computer ?