Remember when I told you about the post office inexplicably jamming a cardboard plug into my PO Box, and sending back all my mail for about three months? Do you recall that rant? My key still worked during that period, nobody said a word to me about it, yet they were returning to sender like a sumbitch. My fee was paid-up, and they couldn’t explain why it happened, once I brought it to their attention.
But I let it slide. I like most of the people who work there, and shit happens. I realize this better than most people (dammit!), and screaming and acting like a crazy person isn’t going to change that fact.
However… I went over there a few days ago, to pay the fee on the box. And they tried to charge me a fine, because I’d let it lapse for a few days. A fine — after they totally screwed me up for three months! The six month fee is $29, but they wanted $50 from me to bring it current.
Yeah, I flipped out. And when the smoke settled, they’d waived all the extra charges. So, we’re even. I cut them a break, they cut me one, and we’re starting with a clean slate.
A couple of things, though… The six-month PO Box fee has gone from $19 to $23 to $29, in about a year. What the hell, man?? Plus, it’s like 1949 in that place. Except for the computerized cash registers, I have a feeling things run EXACTLY the same way they did during the Truman administration. Is there another ongoing business concern that’s stuck in a bigger time warp than the post offices? I certainly can’t think of one. Sweet sainted mother of Grady the Cow!
The whole thing was quite unsatisfying, even though I “won” in the end. They know me there, but don’t give a shit. And I had to act like Sunshine to get a little justice. I don’t like being an asshole, even when I feel like I’ve earned the right. Plus, I kinda caused the problem. Right? If I’d just paid the bill when I received it, none of this would’ve happened.
Have you had any altercations with retail folk lately? Did you get any satisfaction? Or did you over-think it like I did? Please tell us about it in the comments. In fact, it doesn’t even have to be lately. Any stories along those lines will work, from any era.
And I know this one is abbreviated again, but it was almost nothing but crickets. So: better than nothing?
I’ll see you guys again tomorrow.
Have a great day!
Now playing in the bunker
Treat yourself: “How Green Were the Nazis?“
I have been a tad upset by the people that work at Walmart not knowing where something is a time or two.
Like you – I maintain.
Anymore in retail situations I almost always go straight for the jugular. I know it probably doesn’t even register with the misanthropic shits, but fuck them anyway. Almost no one can simply do their job like they give a shit anymore, and I’ve had it and reject the imposition of their ineptitude on my life.
Good Afternoon Surf Reporters….
I work in retail (car dealership) and almost every customer has an attitude and or a chip on their shoulder as soon as they walk in the place.
The atmosphere is ripe for altercations…
This is because car sales-people are the lowest lying scum that this planet has ever or will ever see. This is a fact. Look it up on wikipedia if you want.
I’ve heard, actually, that divorce attorneys are the lowest.
you are absolutely correct!
If King O’ received the Nobel Peace Prize for doubling down on W’s tactic for killing the bad guys in A’stan (“People don’t kill people. Drones kill people.”), then I should be a shoe-in for the WVSR Nancy-Pants Non-Agression Award for resisting the almost-overwhelming urge to engage in discourse with what must be the two most calm, considerate, and reasonable female clients ever to grace the inside of a divorce court.
No GFY. Go figure.
I am currently doing battle with Verizon. Thinking of bringing in one of those “News on Your Side” people and see if Verizon thinks they can win this, bad press and all. Will update, if a resolution is near…
Did battle with Charter, and I won. I just don’t appreciate being lied to by big companies (who believe they can get away with it) and then treated like crap by them after being loyal to them for 7 years or more. Loyalty means ZERO nowadays to these big boys. Zero. Nada. Zilch.
And, my old management/leasing company is run by the biggest asshole in the Midwest who belittles people, is patronizing, condescending…you get the idea. He recently left me a voicemail to the tune of: “I am going to set you straight and I expect this will be the last time I have to answer any questions from you, and I don’t expect to hear back from you ever again”, etc. Nice, right? …in answer to a question I had asked a woman in accounting who did not have an answer, so she brought it to him.
I not only called him back and told him NEVER to speak to me that way again, I followed up by blocking his phone numbers on my phone and his emails. Now, if he tries to contact me again, he will have to really work at it/go through different channels, which I will deem harrassment.
I am surrounded by professional assholes.
I was physically removed from Bank of America years ago.
They transposed two numbers on a payroll check, deposited my check into some account in El Cajon, CA and bounced a bunch of checks on me (this was, like 1986, I was probably 24 and lived from check to check). They paid all the fees and sent letters to all of the bounce-ees, except the phone company. My phone was cut off because of this and they wanted $100 + the bill to turn it back on. I was told I had to speak to the manager to get that authorized, so after several calls to the manager who was never available, I was told to come in the next afternoon. I did, and was told the manager was in a meeting. I waited for over an hour and when I went back to ask if she was out yet, I was told she had left for lunch.
I came unglued. This was a Friday, so the place was PACKED. I ranted and raved at the top of my lungs, closed my account and was escorted to my car by the security guard and asked never to return.
Needless to say, I haven’t banked with those bastards in years.
Good times.
I LOATHE Bank of America!!! Just NO FUCKING COMMON SENSE!!
I deposited my check and hit the grocery store-wrote a check (this was about 10 yrs ago) THEY BOUNCED MY CHECK because my payroll check needed THREE days to clear! WTF?!
However (and this is the best part) I was told I should have “cashed” my check THEN deposited the CASH!
THE HELL?? I had been banking with them over a year at this point. same job, same payroll, ect.
Yep. YANKED my money out and never looked back. Completely NO customer service in the entire building.
Credit Unions ROCK!
Several years later, I was talking to my neighbor who had just retired from BofA. I told him this story and he said “I never banked there for a reason”. This guys WORKED there for 30 years and didn’t bank there. That says it all right there!
I am in the process of removing ALL my BoA accounts (mortgare, checking savings, LOC, CC – it’s A LOT) beacuse they thrice put a fucking TEN DAY hold on my paycheck.. Told me the computer did it and there was nothing they could do. Fuch BofA, fuck em right in the ear.
forgive all my typos – anger makes me twitchy
I bank with Chase. Big giant evil Chase.
Every few months they send me a hand written and hand addressed thank you card for my business.
They know I like candy so they tell me if the bought a new bag of mints or jolly ranchers.
I’ve had an acount with them for over 10 years now and they all know me. I like the people over at big giant evil Chase.
Credit Union Rant:
We used to play poker with the gold sacagawea dollar coins. One night I won like 150 of them, and went into my credit union to put about 80 of them in my checking account.
I start stacking them up on the counter in piles of ten.
Dialogue:
Her: We don’t take unwrapped coins.
Me: (forehead slap, cuz I know this…..) Ok Well, please give me some wrappers.
Her: Ummmm…we don’t HAVE wrappers for those…..
Me: Well, Then I guess you will have to take them UNwrapped……I AM depositing them…..
Her: Ummm it isn’t our policy…..
Me: Ok….manager please…..
Wait 10 minutes to speak with manager…..reiterate discussion with teller….
Mgr: She’s right….we can’t take them……
Me: Well, What if I want to deposit 1 of them??
Her: Oh, 1 we can do!
Me: What about 2?
Her:
Me: What about 7…..How many EXACTLY is the limit?? *1* is OK…*2* is ok……..Is it 6? Is 7?
Her: Well, we have this policy so that our tellers don’t make mistakes counting them.
Me: Sooooooooo….you let them count out $100 bills and don’t worry about their mistakes……but $1 coins is a problem????
Her:
Gold dollar coins… there was a time when they really were gold. Good story.
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I don’t seem to have huge problems with retailers. I guess since I spent the earlier part of my working life in retail, I know what to expect and try to get my ducks all in row before I get there. Politeness almost ALWAYS works, folks!
I can only really remember going off at a pharmacy when I was told they wouldn’t fill a prescription for my sick daughter because the amount of the doctor prescribed was more than what they thought she should have. So, after I thoroughly reamed out the supervisor, I took my feet and my money and I no longer get my prescriptions filled there. That’ll show ’em!
Politeness always works my ass. Many of these idiots wouldn’t recognize politeness and sure as hell have never practiced it.
i get daily calls from telemarketers, dot not feather
first i remind them that i am on a do not call list
they inform me that they are doing a survey, do not call list do not apply
so then i see how much profanity i can use in imaginitive ways
am then informed that i will be placed on their do not call list
and then it starts again tomorrow
has become my daily entertainment
That’s why I have a referee’s whistle right next to the phone. When they start in with that boolshit, throw the penalty flag and stop play with the whistle (into the phone receiver). Don’t normally get any more calls from that particular telemarketer.
I recently changed insurance companies because I did not like the way a claim was handled. I have attempted to remain civil with almost everyone that I have dealt with during all transactions that have been necessary to get this accomplished, but I have also taken every recourse to obtain all of the refunds and money-back guarantees that are coming to me from the insurance company that previously held my policies. I have also made sure that I clearly and forcefully communicated specific scenarios that I deemed unacceptable during the course of settling the claim in question. I am having a few hundred dollars refunded to me as a result of my clear and concise communication in this regard.
We had the water company come to shut off our water a couple of months ago. We weren’t behind on our bill but, apparently, one of our neighbors was. Luckily I was home when they showed up and I told the guy there was a mistake and I brought him a copy my most recent bill (which wasn’t due yet). He was a little confused so he shows me the disconnect notice with my address on it. He calls in and lets me talk to some customer service person. I tell her that there’s some mistake because I have a bill in front of me for $128 that isn’t due for 2 weeks. She verifies my address and tells me that I have a $400 water bill due in full today or I’m shut off. I ask her if we can make some arrangement until we get this figured out since there is obviously some error. Nope. We go around and around. I ask to speak with a supervisor. She says she is the supervisor. I tell her she’s bad at her job and I want to talk to HER supervisor. She tells me that she can’t let me talk to one but will give a name after she speaks with the tech to shut me off. I won’t let her talk to the tech so she hangs up on me and calls him back.
Long story short, I pay a $400 bill over the phone. I call back, talk to the bitch’s supervisor and tell him the situation. He tells me that all calls are recorded and that he will listen to the call. I end up getting a written apology from the water company customer service department and a credit on my bill because, go figure, they’d made an accounting error. Asshats.
I get it, you’re in a menial position and you screwing around with my water bill is you wielding what little power you have over us looming upper middle class. Fine, but do it without talking down to me, because then you’re just going to piss me off.
We used to be *so poor* — yeah we had our water shut off once. Thankfully, my karma kicked in because my next door neighbor was a firefighter and had the tool inside her house to turn it back on.
It was off for 5 minutes. Maybe. Seems they have this tool in case a structure without water service is on fire. Who knew?
Never happened again, but still.
Fortunately, we the $400. If we’d been broke, we’d have been screwed. I still hope the customer no-service bitch got her ass canned.
WooHoo!! Great Monday lift, reading about how everybody has won out over some of my favs in the retail world.
My most soul satisfying experience was with a health insurance company after my husband came down with gout at the tender age of 36. Some dimwit wrote us from the insurance company, demanding his “Medicare number” so that he could be covered for his prescription for gout. He called them back and explained to them more than a couple of times that he didn’t have a Medicare number. I got tired of this and finally sat down and wrote them a letter in which I explained in about a half dozen different ways that my husband did not have a Medicare number, that he did not have Medicare, that he had THEIR health insurance, that THAT number was blah-blah-blah (ya gotta make em want it to just stop), and that he was not old enough to have Medicare–over and over and over again. I finally ended by directing that if the reader of this letter was not able to function without a Medicare number, to please forward it on to someone who could. He got his prescription coverage and a letter of apology from the insurance company that very week. But then, that was over 20 years ago when help was stateside and bureaucrats who needed numbers to function usually only worked for the government….
Then there was the time I had a wreck in my minivan and the tire felt funny. For 3 months. Despite my taking it back to the dealership on a weekly basis. I finally took it back one afternoon, I think it must have been a Friday and the guy was just tired of dealing with me. He told me to drive down the lot and he watched my wheel as I drove. Without another word, I was given a courtesy car and our vehicle stayed there until the entire wheel assembly on that side was replaced, including the mysterious part thingy that attaches it to the car. As soon as I got the precious baby back, I banged out a letter to the owner of the dealership, who unfortunately for almost the entire staff of the service center, greatly admired and respected our son who had worked for them for years, detailing my past 3 months of angst. My son came home from work the day the letter arrived and said that the owner had stormed over to the service center, letter in hand, and fired just about everybody in the service center, seeing as how by 3 months they had nearly all had a hand in allowing me to drive an unsafe and under repaired vehicle.
There are a couple others I’m not allowed to talk about. Sometimes I think I missed my calling and should have been a letter writing advocate of some sort.
Fabulous Monday read. Thanks, Jeff. Give ’em hail, ya’ll!!
I’m always in altercations, but my favorite as of late is BevMo.
My local store started a policy that you *MUST* show an ID for all alcohol purchases. This made the 1 minute grab-and-go all but impossible.
I would let the clerk have my ID but I would not let them swipe it through their reader. They’re collecting marketing info on me on not paying me for it. This would pretty much throw the clerk into neutral, resulting in a call for a manager, resulting in longer and longer lines as I argued my case over and over and over.
To make sure I was getting my point across, I started buying less per visit and going in more often.
They don’t do this any more.
Swiping your ID is a state requirement, not a marketing department thing. It’s harder to fake the ID if it’s a magnetic strip.
This talk of utilities reminds me that when the city use to collect garbage – they almost took my old landlord to jail. It turns out I was the only one paying the garbage bill – and everyone else in the building was not paying. Instead of going after the people, they went after him.
I’m taking the other tack on this one. Companies I’ve had excellent (no sarcasm here) experiences with in the last few months:
Sprint (in the store AND on the phone)
Capital One Business Banking (old school excellent)
USAA Insurance (the absolute best there is in customer service)
I did have a Post Office experience recently. A middle-aged lady in line collapsed from what I gathered was heat exhaustion in line. I went to a teller and let him know, and could I please have a cup of water for her. I had to repeat ‘cup of water’ twice, since that takes extra processing time when you’re on the other side of the counter. He tsked and returned FIVE MINUTES later. FIVE minutes in most contexts is a short amount of time, but this fucker was in no particular rush. He shocked me when he returned with a cold bottle of Dasani water. I rushed it back to her, as she lay on the floor. She reached up, grabbed it and shoved it in her canvas tote, without as much as a thank you. She then DRAGGED herself ON THE FLOOR to the next position in line. Judging by the reactions of the other tellers and customers, this is not the first time this troll has performed this stunt. Felt like such a sucker.
I’ll leave you with a HOT TIP! Buy a few of those prepaid parcel post boxes in various sizes and save yourself some time and aggravation. Just hearing that “dangerous, liquid, or perishable” spewing forth from those thick tongued bastards is enough to set me off.
My personal favorite happened in a Sherwin-Williams in Ohio several years ago. I needed paint and they had a big sign in their window advertising one of their 20% off sales. I got two cans mixed up, but when they rung me up at the register it was full price. What now?
I asked, “Where’s the twenty percent off?”, pointing to the sign. The I-Don’t-Give-A-Shit clerk says, “That? That sign’s old. The sale’s over.” I pointed out that they should honor the sales sign because it’s not my fault that they didn’t take it down when the sale was up. Nope. That’s false advertising! Don’t care. And then we did the Get the Manager/I am the Manager dance. Fully mired in ignorance, she wasn’t budging.
So I stormed out and called the home office to complain. After a brief investigation, they got back to me and said I could go over there now to collect my paint at the advertised sale price.
I got back there and Ms. “I Am the Manager” was on the phone with her car insurance company in tears about her car. Turns out the home office had reemed her out pretty good for being a shiftless lazy fuck. After that she thought the best course of action to work out her anger would be to go out back and buzz around the lot with the company forklift. As you do. Aaaaand she ended up forklifting her car clear through.
That, my friends, is Karma with a capital K. The Paint Gods simply don’t shit around.
Next time the paint store pulls that scam here is what you do. Since the paint is already mixed just walk right out the door. Send in a friend the next day to buy the paint for $3/gallon in the ‘scratch and dent’ section.
Little known fact. Harry s Truman was never president. It was actually gary hufflestein.
Everybody knows that.
Recent experience at Walmart.
I bought a fluroescent shop light several months ago for my mom’s house. Never got around to installing it and she said she didn’t need it after all. Fortunately I had taped the receipt to the box. was purchased in April.
Walmart has always been pretty easy to return stuff to – so imagine my shock when some rookie asshat says, our policy is 90 days max, or no return. WTF? she wouldn’t budge. And admittedly the policy IS right up there on the wall, but I had never seen that in any walmart store.
So I said, if I came in here without a receipt, you’d give me a refund right away, cause you wouldn’t know how old it was right? ummm, she wouldn’t give me a straigh answer.
So I went outside, wadded up the receipt, handed the box to my wife and had her take it inside, say she lost the receipt. Instant refund. Stupid.
A few months ago I switched all my banking from Wells Fargo to a local credit union, I transferred the funds and ripped up my checks, unfortunately I forgot to let Wells Fargo know of my decision and last week when I accidentally paid my credit card off of that account Wells Fargo sent me a nasty text message and charged me $35 overdraft fee.
After I realized what happened I called them and asked if they cold waive the fee because “I’m apparently just a giant moron” and they said “absolutely” Huh.
I didn’t really think it would work – it was entirely my fault. It almost makes me feel bad about taking my business elsewhere.
Not quite the same thing, but Saturday I visited six different retail outlets trying without success to buy a couple of 9-inch Pyrex pie plates. Exotic stuff, I know.
I know you can buy stuff online nowadays, but I “needed” them right away. These used to be a grocery-store item, but no more. The few stores that have pie plates at all stock the new giant-sized Pyrex one. It is 67% larger volume than the old one, and so no existing pie recipes will fit in it. Who buys these, and what do they use them for?
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Sir, the Bon Apetit blog is down the hall, to the left.
Ah. I shall bitch thereto. Mercy buckets.
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A bunch of people, men and women, are outside my office talking about their vasectamies and tearing from V-to-A during birth (respectively).
I want to murder all of them.
It’s early, and I transcribed your “men and women” comment and read it as women and men”… The rest of your sentence is frightening when read that way.
Were they comparing the scars?
When my Daughter turned 11, she got a bunch of gift cards. She loves to shop. After visiting and purchasing in a few stores, she went into a chain cosmetic store (Sephora) and was looking around. As she was leaving, a salesperson accused her of shoplifting, and made her empty her bags. She had not stolen anything,and when this woman figured it out, she just told her to leave. FYI, you can’t be accused of stealing until you have left the building. My girlie was mortified.
I lost my shit on the regional manager. I went total Mama Bear. She was soooo sorry, and told me that it was not their policy to look into bags, apparently this salesperson had gone rogue. She wanted to have my girl come back in so she could talk to her and apologize, and even give her a bottle of perfume. That was not my intention, and I said no, but it was nice of her to offer.
We still shop there, but only because of the way it was handled.
I have a water turner-offer tool
Why? Just for shits and giggles?? Are you some sort of mad practical joker??
Better than nothing indeed. I had a run in with the douchbags at Best Buy recently. I bought a computer and the kid following me around INSISTED that I get a warranty. “Oh, you’re going to trust that to HP?” he asked. “Of course. Shouldn’t I, or is this a fucked up machine from the get go?” “Uh, no. No sir. It’s a great computer.” “Oh, I’m not so sure now. You’re telling me that I should spend nearly what I spent on the computer for some kind of absurd insurance. Is it a decent machine or not?” Anyway, I’d been through the shit with them a lot. I know they make their money on warranties. But I wasn’t their to pad their fucking bottom line, I was there to get a computer. And so I did. Without a warranty.
I’m not a big complainer. I don’t have many “run ins” to tell you the truth. But if I wanted to get fucked I spend my money with some whore, not Best Buy. Know what I mean?
Ok, this here is harsh but true:
If you raise your voice to people who are working way below your pay grade at a place they hate, you’re just a bully and a dipshit. If you can’t see the world from other people’s point of view, there’s a name for you: sociopath.
If you regularly shop at a Big Box or Big Dick store which has already run all the other retail shops out of town, you don’t get to complain about not being able to find an item you used to find easily. You, in fact, ARE the problem.
Anybody who is surprised that big banks, big telecoms or big cable companies are out to fuck them with their pants on has been snoozing way too long.
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Buy local, be polite, watch your ass.
jtb
Amen!
What have you got against the Big Dick store? Where is a person supposed to go when he/she needs a big dick?
Oh, now I get it. The corporate big dick stores are bad, but a locally-owned big dick store is OK. As long as the big dicks that they are selling are not made in a sweatshop that is exploiting third-world children to make big dicks as cheaply as possible. These foreign-made big dicks have put American big dick factory workers out of work, and closed almost all of the big dick factories in this country. I know that this is a central issue being debated in the current presidential election, with one side claiming that he is the champion of the big dick workers in the US, and the other side attacking his past record on big dicks. Honestly, I don’t really know who to vote for this November to protect the future of big dicks in this great nation of ours.
How the hell did the voice of reason get on this site? WTF?
Johnthebasket, very very on the money with your post. We live in a crappy time folks. Seems like most of us on this site are old enough to remember better times, so it shouldn’t be so hard to understand that most people are NOT having a better day than you.
I was an idiot growing up. Circumstances lead to an early life traveling all over the United States and getting a “romantic” view of the hotel industry. Somehow I imagined “Fantasy Island” type hotel industry, where everyone practically kiss me for making their vacation so wonderful. I then proceeded to spend four years at a college to get a Hotel Management degree… Here’s the real scoop:
Airport Hotels are NOT owned by Airlines. Therefore, it is not the hotel’s fault that the airplane was late, broken, overbooked, stayed on the runway 18 hours, or crashed. But each customer that checks in to an airport hotel will complain about EACH and every aspect of the hotel… To the Front Desk clerk… The 8 buck an hour minion.
The manager/director/owner/whatever typically tells the clerk EVERY day the “rack rate” for the day. Yes, it sucks that the hotel companies do this rate shit, but it’s a fact that they do and it’s not the clerk that does this. If you give too many rooms under the “rack rate”, you’re fired. And it’s been this way for decades. Yet, each customer will pull every club membership cards they have (gas stations, people?!?!?), have birthdays or give birth, whatever, to get a lower than Rack Rate. OR otherwise berate the clerk.
I, nor any other clerk I’ve ever known, have NOT been to every room in the hotel. Therefore, if the computer says the room is non-smoking, we pretty much are stuck thinking it’s non-smoking. Hey, my own mother forced me to exist 18 years with a smoker, and then DIED from cancer from smoking. I HATE smoking. And yet, someone at some time or other, will have smoked in the hotel room (undoubtedly while looking and smirking at the “no smoking in room” sign), and yes any customer who asks for non-smoking room will berate the clerk if there’s residue smell of smoke.
Ever wonder why the hotel won’t let you carry the bags up yourself with the luggage cart? Oh, probably DID start as a way to get customers to tip the bellmen, etc. But nowadays, the reason? If the customer gets control of the cart at any time, the customer will keep the cart in their room for their entire visit. So that they won’t have to carry the luggage bag that they themselves overpacked with items such as kitchen sinks and such.
Oh well, this post from the old man wasn’t about hotels in the first place, so I’ll stop. Just remember folks, your life sucks, the person you’re yelling at life sucks. The person you SHOULD be yelling at are those congealed discharge of a chili fart (otherwise called Politicians) in our nation/state capitals.
The rabbits. Fascinating.
Ass-rabbits are fascinating.
I CAN HEAR YOU JESUS !!!!!!
Unfortunately, Jesus doesn’t give a rat’s ass about any of us right now.
There are pennant races to be decided, and a one-game wild card playoff in each league. Not to mention the NFL, and Tebow.
We’ll just have to count on JTB to set our course.
-Dude
Dude…
I think you’re aware that Jesus always played best two out of three, and that I set nobody’s course but my own.
jtb
JTB, are SO right! Thank you! I am a stay-at-home mom with a college degree who chooses to stay home (some say a waste of an education). For the last couple of years, just to earn a little extra money since we were a single income family, I took a VERY part-time job at an upscale grocery store. I gave excellent customer service and went out of my way to help every single customer with whom I dealt. And let me tell you, 50% of those jerks never even had enough respect for me to even look me in the eye… no response, no smile in return, many wouldn’t even speak to me when I asked a question. It was as if they were dealing with an ATM and not a living, breathing human being working damn hard to help them. 25% of those jerks DID speak, but talked with an arrogant and condescending tone that made me wish they were the silent jerks. Then the last 25% were wonderfully pleasant, kind people who understand that we are all working together to just get by.
I didn’t mean to preach… I just hope that we don’t always jump to the conclusion that anyone working in retail is an uneducated, uncaring schlub who just collects a paycheck and leaves. There is a very good chance that the jerk who just checked out ahead of you treated that employee like scum… and its sometimes hard to bounce back from that in the 5 second window we get between customers.
Wall mart can suck my fun sized cock but the fact of the matter is we created Walmart and allowed it to happen. Its called having a successful business model. Suck it trebek.
I feel it a comin’….United Health care for an out of pocket expense today (Cobra paper work hadn’t been finalized) and Comcast-The-Bastards.
I’ve got a Marathon credit card. If you spend over a $1000 a month, you get $.25/ gallon back. We spend that much on gas and we always pay it off so it works out okay. On a recent Sunday night I went into town, got gas and went to the grocery store. Monday morning the phone rings and I see it’s the credit card company so I think I better get it. I answer and they immediately, without talking to anyone, put me on hold. They call me and put me on hold. Fuck you deeply, thank you not. So I hang up and go about my business. They never call back so I figure it’s not important. Tuesday night both the wife and I try to use the card and have the pleasant experience of having th card rejected. WTF?! So I call these numbnuts the next morning and tell them what happened. They say yes, there was “suspicious activity” on my card (gas and groceries) so they cancelled it since they couldn’t get hold of me. I ask when they tried and they say Monday morning. I tell them they did get hold of me but instead of talking to me they put me on hold. They say that’s their “policy”. I tell them their customer service sucks. Then I ask why they didn’t at least let me know they had cancelled my card. They said they had no way of getting hold of me. I remind them that they called me and I answered. They tell me that’s their “policy”. I tell them I’m glad they’re doing so well that they can afford to lose good customers and that I will never again use any of their products. The clueless bastards THANK ME and ask if there is anything else they can help me with. I tell them they can help me by kissing my big white butt and shoving their worthless card.
The same week, my trash company doesn’t pick up my trash. I call them the next day and ask why. They say that “there was a line down” and they couldn’t get to my house. Okay, I suppose that’s possible. Then I ask when they’re coming back to get it. She says next week. I say I have nowhere to store a weeks worth of trash. She says there’s nothing they can do but they won’t charge me extra to pick it up the next week. Huh? You’re not going to charge me extra to pick up the trash next week that you were supposed to pick up this week? That’s mighty damn big of you, dickweeds. I have to be out of town for a few days so I let it slide. The next week, I take all of the trash, two weeks worth, out again. I come home that night and it’s still there. Now I’m really pissed so I call them back the next morning. I explain the situation and she tells me they still couldn’t get to my house because of the low power line. What low power line? She’s says the same one that kept them from coming last week too. I explain that they told me a line was down, not that one was low (whatever the hell that means.) As I’m talking to her, I see another companies trash truck coming down the road. I hang up, run outside and try to pay them to take my trash. They apologize and say they can’t. I ask if they’ve seen any low power lines? Nope. As they’re driving away, a dump truck and cement truck drive by. So I call my trash company back and ask how big their trucks are that they can’t make it down here but everyone else seems to be able to. She doesn’t know how big their truck are so I tell her they’re the SAME DAMN SIZE!! Then I ask what I’m supposed to do with 2 weeks of trash sitting at the end of my driveway. She tells me that I need to go find out what kind of line it is and whose house it’s going into, then call the company responsible, have the line fixed, then call the trash company back and they’ll come get my trash. At this point I completely lose it and vent for a few minutes. Then I tell her I want a refund for the last two weeks and I want to cancel my service. She calmly tells me, okay, you’ll need to have your receptacle out by the curb by 7:00 on Monday morning so they can pick it up. After I stop laughing, I tell her the only way she will ever see that receptacle again is if they come and pick up the two weeks of trash in my driveway right now. She says again they have to have it by the curb on Monday. I tell her she will never see it again. She says okay, but it has to be out there Monday morning. At this point I am alternately laughing and screaming at her and all she will do is tell me it has to be there Monday morning. I decide to try a new tack. Tell me, I say, what do they send to pick up the receptacle? A truck, she says. I laugh loudly as this. She doesn’t understand why I’m laughing. I explain again that if they pick up my trash, I might give their trash can back at some point. Maybe. Someday. At this point she acts hurt and hangs up. I go outside and pull the receptacle back into my garage, swearing the whole time that they will never get this thing back. I call another service and get service started for the next week and in the process explain why I’m switching. They offer to send a truck out later. I say thank you and hang up. At this point, I hear a truck outside. Sure enough – it’ my old trash company and some guy I’ve never seen is throwing my trash into his truck. I go out and ask how he managed to get here considering all the low hanging power lines. He looks at me like, what are you talking about? Turns out he’s the supervisor and I explain the whole thing to him. He just shakes his head the whole time. After I’m done, he asks what he can do to keep my business. He’s been pretty decent so I politely tell him I’ve got a new service already and if he wants their trash can, he better come get it now because it’s the last he’ll ever see of it if he doesn’t. How do these places stay in business?.
Like I said….comment #2!
I blame the 47 percent…
Yeah, those 47 percent bastards are responsible for a lot. Can someone explain to me, using small words and no political talk, why this is such a close election? I appreciate it.
jtb
What our system needs is a third political party: The Whigs. That’s right, I want to bring back Millard Fillmore.
ABC, NBC, MSNBC, CBS, CNN, HLN, The New Black Panthers, and the pole smokin’ Anderson Cooper.
m-e-d-i-a… They sell the ads that inspire us to contribute to the candidates that make us feel warm and fuzzy, so why wouldn’t any media outlet want to keep the election close, rule #1 it’s all about ratings and revenue.
JTB,
The 47 percent.
You’re welcome.
-Dude
I blame the Canadians
hot… How can you blame people who are drunk all the time? Oh, wait…
My assistant is about to go be the Assistant District Attorney for Oahu Island.
So, you know, if you get a loitering citation in Honolulu, I can hook you up.
That’s great. Can your assistant sneak me into the secret room so I can look for Obama’s birth certificate that’s not there?
Look under “Republic of Kenya” for your fake birth certificates. Search on “1964”.
Jesus, people. You’re entitled to your own opinion, but you’re not entitled to your own facts.
.
Give the birthers a break, Chill. Remember, they weren’t born — they were hatched.
jtb
…and stoopid just can’t be fixed…
The branch of my credit union that I occasionally visit has begun putting out tootsie rolls at all of the teller windows. In your face, Wells Fargo!
Tootsie rolls! Genius!
I think I can relate to crack addicts…
I used to get the occasional hand job at my credit union…then my sister quit. #badredneckjoke
I’d like to comment not about evil retail, but about ‘stuck in the past’ businesses – why does my dentist still scrape my teeth with raw steel like he’s Conan the Barbarian? Surely SOMEONE by now could have found a way to have some modern lamp or ointment or hungry chinese fish to magic the gunk off my gums without resorting to ironmongery!
Are you related to Sheldon Cooper?
Does it show? 🙂