Before we get started with this one… a few “miscommunication shirts” remain available for purchase. More than forty of your fellow Surf Reporters are already onboard though, and the end is near. So, if you want one, now’s the time to act. Right now! Or a little later, whatever.
Over the weekend I had a Thin Mint Cookie Blizzard, at Dairy Queen. It was made with shards of my favorite Girl Scout cookie, and I thought it might be something I’d enjoy. But the shrapnel is embedded in a mint-flavored ice cream that, in my opinion, takes things too far. It was like eating cold toothpaste.
If they’d just used the regular white soft serve that is the basis for all things DQ, I’d probably be raving right now. But I was kinda disappointed. Have you had it? What did you think?
Apparently Dairy Queen offers one new novelty Blizzard each month, and Thin Mint is what they came up with for September. I’ve got my fingers crossed for November. I’m hoping they’ll hit us with a Thanksgiving Dinner Blizzard, featuring turkey, gravy, stuffing, and pumpkin pie.
What other limited edition Blizzards could they offer at Dairy Queen? Maybe we can help them out? I have a feeling we can brainstorm a few cutting-edge flavor combinations for those folks. Use the comments section below.
Have you ever had one of your emails, or text messages, misconstrued — because the recipient mistook the tone of it?
Toney has a friend in California with whom she exchanges a lot of correspondence. A lot of correspondence. Her phone is continuously humming and vibrating, and going to town. And when she checks it, it’ll say something like “I’m eating marshmallows!”
…Well, “marshmallows” would likely be misspelled, but you know what I mean. The woman updates Toney on every tiny detail of her life, and it’s fairly hilarious. I have a great time predicting what the latest text will be.
Anyway, a couple of weeks ago Toney wrote to her, “I can’t believe you’re still [something or other].” Meaning: That’s amazing! But the woman took it to mean: “I don’t believe you, I think you’re a lying bag of turds.” Heh.
This triggered two or three days of attitude and cold-shoulder from the woman in California, and Toney felt kinda bad about it, even though she didn’t really do anything.
Has this ever happened to you? I don’t send too many texts, and never answer my email (a joke — sorta), so I can’t remember running into such a problem. What about you?
Steve recently spotted this listing in a weekly newspaper published in his neck of the woods. And how’s that for hard-hitting journalism? Kinda reminiscent of Woodward and Bernstein’s work during Watergate, isn’t it?
And finally, is an orange called an orange because it’s orange, or is orange called orange because of the orange? It’s very important that I get to the bottom of this…
Have a great day, boys and girls.
I’ll see you tomorrow.
FOIST !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Early!!
Sweet! I’m in early!
No Comments? Tap – Tap – Tap – Is this thing on?
I can’t belive I’m the first one on today. That and ten bucks’l gets me a tee shirt. What’s a text? Answer e-mail? Mostly I get recycled jokes form retired people that have nothing else to do. Wish I had someone to sort them for me. Mostly I send e-mail to my Congressman and Senators everyday reminding them how to vote in order to avoid term limits.
Oh well I guess I didn’t hit send fast enough. Still top five.
My trusty OED tells me that the first known English (AD 1387) use of the word orange was to refer to the fruit of the orange tree, so I think it’s safe to say that things are orange colored in reference to the orange fruit.
Yeah, I’m a hit at parties.
Good Afternoon Surf Reporters……
There are no words that rhyme with orange
or purple for that matter.
just sayin’
Misconstrued communication? I do know some women and I frequently communicate with them, so yes I’ve experienced misconstrued communications…
or Silver
I’m a Ten!
I s’pose I oughta contribute:
Oranges are called oranges because they are orange. Its sorta like how movies are called movies because they move; unlike photographs, which are still. Because of this, I have always wondered why we don’t call photographs ‘stillies’.
My DQ Blizzard flavor idea = Frozen Harvey Wallbanger
After a five day vacation, it took me about ten minutes to catch up from last Tuesday afternoon.
Dairy Queen should go back to the chili they had on their hot dogs in the late sixties. I can’t even gag one of those down now. How about Sixties Chilidog Novelty Blizzards.
I never text. I am not fourteen.
The name of the orange (fruit) was “naranj” in Sanskrit. (Ancient Indian) The Arabics, who traded with the Indians (dot, not feather) called it “‘Naranjah”. The Spanish translated it to “Naranjaj”, which was translated in English to “Naranj” and later changed tochanged to a “Narange”. The “N” was then deleted and the “A” was eventually changed to an “O”. Floow me?
On IPOD right now- “What You GIve”- Tesla
Do double/triple posts by the same person count? Am I only an eight instead?
“Follow me?”, I meant. Please don’t floow me.
Misconstrued e-mails? Hell yeah, I’m the queen of those. Apparently my wry, sarcastic humor doesn’t translate well when unspoken. So yes, there’s been quite a few occasions where I’ve landed in trouble, so much so that for a few people I just started limiting my e-mails to one sentence facts (or stopped e-mailing them altogether). I haven’t had any issues with texts or Facebook posts…..yet. Give it time.
Welcome back, AWG!
AWG: Those of us infused with the “Philadelphia Dialect” still say “orange” as “arange”. I broke myself of that after moving away, but I happily still pronounce “water” as “wudder”, among other things. Drives the Yinzers insane.
Barnyard gravy blizzard?
Haha….good one, Zazu!!!
Whoever named the orange probably hadn’t seen the carrot or the pumpkin yet.
Jeff,
I am really disappointed. I have been reading your blog/journal what have you for a long time. So on your advice I signed up for Emusic, expecting great things and almost squealing with anticipation for all the great music I would soon acquire. Emusic blows. Straight up sucks. The first three searches I did were for a Modest Mouse EP, Muse’s new album, and Death From Above 1979. Emusic had NONE of it. I rarely take a chance on recommendations, but you seemed such a no nonsense guy that you wouldn’t recommend something that was half ass.
Live and learn I guess.
People often mistake what I say, e-mail, and text… not for lack of tone (well… often for lack of tone) but mostly for lack of understanding. I always say exactly what I mean but people often don’t say exactly what they mean to me because they substitute words, use double negatives or toss in contractions where they don’t intend to have them… which totally changes the meaning of what they are attempting to convey. My responses, then, are predicated on fucked up info which causes confusion. If only I had taken “Dyslexic Redneck” instead of Spanish and Russian.
Ham Sandwich Blizzard (soft serve with crutons, cubes of ham, and a mayo swirl)
Dude Ranch Blizzard (soft serve with chocolate chips and a Ranch Dressing swirl)
Pimento Cheese Blizzard (ice cold pimento cheese with a celery stick jammed in it.
My e-mails are constantly misconstrued. I’ve gotten where I don’t care. Spice of life type thing. “What part of ‘let’s get a hotel and fuck while your husband is away’ sounds rude?” I don’t get it.
I speak fluent Dyslexic Redneck from my four years in the mountains of North Carolina. Is “idn’t” an actual word? Lots of use of that word in Boone.
On IPOD right now- “Midnight Lullaby”- Tom Waits
The new blizzard flavor should be Blue Cheese with Anchovy bits
Sarcasm never translates in text form…I usually follow a sarcastic statement with *sarcasm* due to the bewildering amount of folks who just don’t get it or expect it….and quite honestly, I’d expect anyone whom I was sending a text to know better!
@Jason – yummmmm! In the same vein – baked potato with sour cream and chives???
Guacamole Blizzard. Serve it with tortilla chips.
Zazu the pitts,
Run to the patent office. Run with wing tipped shoes!
For some reason this whole blizzard question makes me think of SNL’s bass-o-matic gag Just add the soft serve to the bass-o-matic for a new taste treat!
Not sure I will be able to get that out of my mind the next time I order my favorite cookie dough
@Jason-think we gotta new restaurant concept going here! We just need a name.
Here’s a few restaurant name ideas:
“Good Flavors in Your Mouth”
“Catfish N Peaches”
“Me Love You Long Time”
“Uncle Perv’s”
“Dairy King”
Anyone ever been to the Gilroy Garlic Festival? They have GARLIC FLAVORED ICE CREAM. The line was so long the last time I went (years ago) I never got to try it. More for curiosity sake that the thought I might actually like it. Anyway, it could be the base for many a disgusting Blizzard theme, methinks.
Happy Monday, Surfers!
Now “Oranges Poranges” by Witchie-Poo from HR Puffenstuff is going through my head. Thanks JCIII!
Oops, just marking my spot. Stop looking up my Kilt…
The only people who misconstrue the meaning and intent of my messages are those who fail to to grasp the concept that I am always right.
Pretzels and Beer Blizzard
Wine and Cheese Blizzard
Vodka and…well…Vodka Blizzard.
Hungry Man Meat Loaf TV Dinner Bilzzard.
Blizzard of Lies Blizzard (Dave Frishberg tune)…ice flavored ice.
And let’s not forget our seniors…Metamucile and Poligrip Blizzard. (Half off on the Early Bird Special)
Have you ever watched Iron Chef America? They make ice cream out of anything! Ick.
Shiny – wasn’t me! 😉
Ivan,
Emusic deals exclusively in independent labels. They also don’t have agreements with all indie labels. Jeff obviously has broad tastes in music, and emusic seems to serve him well for SOME things, but if you read his posts he buys a lot from Amazon as well.
I generally find 50% of what I’m looking for at emusic, and get the rest somewhere else. Is it perfect? Nope, but the price is right, they carry stuff you can’t get anywhere else, and they are adding more labels all the time (for example: they just acquired the rights to the old Husker Du stuff like New Day Rising and Metal Circus).
Mac and cheese w bacon Blizzard.
ga-zin-ta and fixn-ta are two I hear in VA. Oh and for those on the left coast there is no East VA. Just West VA and VA.
Alpo Blizzard – Makes you want to lay in the street and lick yourself.
Hmmm, I think I need to subscribe to Brynhildr’s point of view. 😉
Laserboy — there is no “left coast”. Just the West Coast.
@brynhildr politically speaking the West coast IS the left coast:)
Best misconstrued text message my former Secretary was about 800 years old & did really cool shit like shorthand & typing! Not to savvy on the texting however! when one of my colleagues Mother decided to take advantage of the basement condo,she earnestly sent a text: “I’m sorry your Mother died LOL!”
She genuinely thought LOL meant Lots of Love!!!
Pagan, I thought we all agreed not to get political here. “Left coast” must therefore refer to something else. Otherwise, the rules have been broken, and we can’t have that, can we?
I would have to agree with Gretchen, sarcasm does not translate well in written form, perhaps I just don’t write well. I think I will use Monicas idea and put *SARCASM AHEAD* just before the sarcasm.
Knucklehead-I have friends in Los Gatos and we went to Monterey golfing which brought us close to Gilroy. Just so happens the Garlic festival was going on. I’ve been wanting to see this ever since I saw it on Food Network but my friend said Gilroy was too white trashy and we wouldn’t have fun. WTF! I don’t care about white trash I want to try some damn garlic ice cream. Can’t win ’em all I suppose.
As for the blizzard; Since it’s football season and football season means tailgating how about bratwurst and beer! MMMM! Or chili and beer, with or without beans depending on your locale.
Oh and most importantly a big ol’ Whodey to my invisible friends in the Pittsburg area! First pro game Big Ben ever lost in Ohio and only the 3rd time he has ever lost in Ohio as a starting quarterback since high school. Maybe the tide is finally changing.
@Brynhildr — always enjoy your posts; in this case, as a left coaster, I need to defend Lazerboy’s usage. However….
@Lazerboy — Has someone on the left coast given you the impression we don’t understand the history, people, and primary fruits and minerals of Virginia and West Virginia? We know a Virgin Queen when we see one, which reminds me…
@Pagan — Good bet that your 800 year-old secretary who took shorthand (still handy) and typed (we still use a qwerty keyboard) wouldn’t have produced the sentence “Not to savvy on the texting however!”.
That one had me trying to figure out the verb “to savvy” until I discerned that you meant “too savvy”. The fact that it was a funny story sorta balanced the universe. I’m juxtaposin’
jtb
Prune Danish Blizzard!
Corndog and mustard Blizzard.
@Debra
You’re breakin’ my heart kid. Read yesterday’s comment or tell me to piss up a rope. I’m feelin’ bad for makin’ you sad.
jtb
Jason,
Shouldn’t that be Uncle Perv’s Sof’ Serv?
Pagan: There are a lot of us down here in Orange County who are anything but “left”, thankyouverymuch.
Brynhildr’s right–politics gets things boiling in the wrong way. It even got me to post.