Before we get started with this one… a few “miscommunication shirts” remain available for purchase. More than forty of your fellow Surf Reporters are already onboard though, and the end is near. So, if you want one, now’s the time to act. Right now! Or a little later, whatever.
Over the weekend I had a Thin Mint Cookie Blizzard, at Dairy Queen. It was made with shards of my favorite Girl Scout cookie, and I thought it might be something I’d enjoy. But the shrapnel is embedded in a mint-flavored ice cream that, in my opinion, takes things too far. It was like eating cold toothpaste.
If they’d just used the regular white soft serve that is the basis for all things DQ, I’d probably be raving right now. But I was kinda disappointed. Have you had it? What did you think?
Apparently Dairy Queen offers one new novelty Blizzard each month, and Thin Mint is what they came up with for September. I’ve got my fingers crossed for November. I’m hoping they’ll hit us with a Thanksgiving Dinner Blizzard, featuring turkey, gravy, stuffing, and pumpkin pie.
What other limited edition Blizzards could they offer at Dairy Queen? Maybe we can help them out? I have a feeling we can brainstorm a few cutting-edge flavor combinations for those folks. Use the comments section below.
Have you ever had one of your emails, or text messages, misconstrued — because the recipient mistook the tone of it?
Toney has a friend in California with whom she exchanges a lot of correspondence. A lot of correspondence. Her phone is continuously humming and vibrating, and going to town. And when she checks it, it’ll say something like “I’m eating marshmallows!”
…Well, “marshmallows” would likely be misspelled, but you know what I mean. The woman updates Toney on every tiny detail of her life, and it’s fairly hilarious. I have a great time predicting what the latest text will be.
Anyway, a couple of weeks ago Toney wrote to her, “I can’t believe you’re still [something or other].” Meaning: That’s amazing! But the woman took it to mean: “I don’t believe you, I think you’re a lying bag of turds.” Heh.
This triggered two or three days of attitude and cold-shoulder from the woman in California, and Toney felt kinda bad about it, even though she didn’t really do anything.
Has this ever happened to you? I don’t send too many texts, and never answer my email (a joke — sorta), so I can’t remember running into such a problem. What about you?
Steve recently spotted this listing in a weekly newspaper published in his neck of the woods. And how’s that for hard-hitting journalism? Kinda reminiscent of Woodward and Bernstein’s work during Watergate, isn’t it?
And finally, is an orange called an orange because it’s orange, or is orange called orange because of the orange? It’s very important that I get to the bottom of this…
Have a great day, boys and girls.
I’ll see you tomorrow.
There’s no Left Coast? Then explain this:
@ Brynhildr — As someone who would be in a very small political minority on this site, and as a long time wvsr guy, I agree on the tacit and explicit agreements to ride the white line on politics. I guess I’d just never thought of “left coast” as a particularly political characterization. My man, Kinky Friedman, close friend of both the Clinton and Bush clans, uses “left coast” on a regular basis in both his fiction and non-.
I guess I can find another way of describing by geographical identity without using this construction. I’ll work on it…jtb
WB in OH says
I always took left coast to mean when viewing a map it was on the “left” side of the map. Unless of course you’re holding said map upside down, in which case your probably too stupid to get where you’re going anyway. Just my .02
Maker’s Mark Blizzard with chunks o’ Smoked Pork.
My apologies, Tyrosine. I didn’t realize that the name of a brewing company was the final word. Perhaps then I can start my own and call it East Virginia Stoopid Redneck Brewing Company. That should negate any objection to fictitious geographical names, poor spelling, and unfair stereotypes.
@JTB (we use @ to irritate those who despise the concept:) despite the fact that sadly I’m am English Major (Literature not Grammar!) The precise reason I have an 800 year old secretary is so I don’t offend those with waaayyy to much time on their hands who actually look for those poor Neanderthal’s such as myself who’s Alzheimer’s have caused them to forget the correct usage of too vs to! HOW’S THAT FOR SARCASM? Har!
“Left coast” was originally used to imply left-wing politics and was (and is still to some extent) considered derogatory. I think some left-wingers have decided to embrace the term in order to take some of the bite out of it. Still, it is pejorative if the person uttering it is a right-wing conservative or religious zealot. 😉
WB in OH says
Is it just sarcasm I’m missing or is everybody pissy today?
WB in OH says
MI2Tall-I’ll take one of those or twelve, whichever!
WB — where is the center of the world if the West Coast is always on the left side of a map (other than when it is upside down)?
WB in OH says
Well I suppose if you are viewing a globe and studying the coast of China you have a valid point. In my post I was thinking of a map of just the Continental US. Left coast may be offensive but you can’t beat the weather!
Sarcasm is inherently a wee bit pissy, but I suppose I may have mistaken the purpose of Jeff’s update. I thought our assignment was to get each other to misconstrue things and start a war in the comments section. Oh dear, I’ve really mucked it up. **sarcasm**
WB in OH says
I will keep my nose out of other peoples arguments. I should have my hands full once the steeler faithful sober up.
zazu the pitts says
@Jason – I vote for “Catfish and Peaches”! Has a certain ring to it!
@LaserBoy – I think we should also include your Alpo Blizzard on the menu. I wouln’t mind being made to feel like laying in the road and liking myself!!!
Hal F. Wit says
We need a sarcasm font.
Tempo Relentless says
Hey Jeff !!!
I hope you read these regularly…anyway, did you get my email about my groggy ‘Miscommunication Shirt’ XXL purchase that I would like to upgrade to a XXXL to help conceal my girlish figure? Please help !!!
Also, how about those Yankees ??!!!???
We are not bitchy. Now STFU
Yes, I have had comments misconstrued because the written word doesn’t convey the proper tone. I wish I could remember an example. Oh here’s one; I wish the grammar, spelling and political police would take a long walk off a short pier. Whoops, is that the incorrect usage of a semi-colon? Oh no, did I use a hyphen when I shouldn’t have? Did I spell “pier” correctly? Are my commas and question marks placed approriately? ARRGGGHHHH. I don’t want to know.
I am consuming a sarcasm blizzard at this very moment.
WB – I grew up in Los Gatos! Gilroy used to be a lot of migrant farm workers, but has now become a sort of “suburb” of San Jose.
I always thought the term “Left Coast” to be quite misleading. Sure, it works for us here in SF, but not so much Southern California, the Central Valley or the Northern Butte County area (holy Red State, Batman)
Chuck in Belpre says
the ‘Left Coast’ ‘Right Coast’ thing was started by Texans. If you stand in Houston and face North then you have your left coast and your right coast. At least thats what Dan Jenkins says.
Up north, we often refer to Vancouver, BC as being on the Wet Coast…
I had no idea if I was left or right until the last election. Honest! I know a tailor asked me that once. I just thought Washington, Oregon and Cali were on the “left coast” regardless of politics. Thought it was a cool term. No politics.
@Tyrosine…WOW!…you had me at “Asylum beer”. Now I gotta plan a road trip.
To, too, two, your, you’re, their, there. Yeah…I know that’s kinda important but this ain’t a writers workshop. In fact…I put down about 3500 words the past two days on something I’m working on and used “further” instead of “farther”, because that’s the way the character would say it. Punctuation?…meh. Here at Jeff’s place I’d rather here the story than worry about a dot or two hear or their.
Bev keeps saying…Cuervo Gold and Peanut Butter Blizzard. I guess now you know why we’re together. Weird chick I tell ya.
Greg in Cincinnati says
I have an Aunt with whom I’ve had great discourse over the years. She found my website called “Stinks.” She made 60 separate page views and 13 comments disparaging every view I might have held. I thought I was famous!
I knew I had stepped deep deep down in the brown apple pie when SWMBO told me you done done something so inciteful to riot, that you will never be forgiven. I always had it in my hear that I could be stoopiter than she thought I could. Cue the Rocky theme song!
It is Bourbon season, or at least in my case Vodka season. Cheap Cleveland is my brand.
Ummm, a blizzard of what I like to eat the most? That one’s easy.
Ian the Errolite says
I’m often misunderstood by folks on here, being from another continent and all that, but it was nice to share viewpoints and shoot the breeze now and then.( I’ll never use the abreviation ‘lol’ so its partly my fault, but I do have certain standards.)
However, I’ve noticed over the years that the comments section has become increasingly more territorial and caustic.
John the basket – you mentioned my son yesterday in a cryptic message. I really don’t want to be reading this kind of stuff as it gets me all fired up and homicidal. (If I’m mistaken, and your message was harmless, sorry for the misunderstanding. )
So, for everyone’s sake, the Errolite is signing off.
Don’t go Ian. Don’t let stupidity run you off. We need you. Really.
Ian I promise to only use HA, HaHa, teehee, Heh, and the occasional hardy har har, if you’ll please stay around. I like your posts and your non-American perspective.
Um let me change that to non-North American perspective as I know there are many Canadians here and I don’t want to be run out of town.
Don’t know what to say. You mentioned a Christmas gift for your son, and I said (I don’t think in a criptic way) that you would probably choose to sell the tickets and buy your son the present because ‘Opportunities of a lifetime rarely come labled as such.’
I simply asserted that your son was the opportunity of a lifetime for you. I recognize the reference was oblique, but, based on your previous posts, I thought you’d pick up on it. I certainly didn’t intend to freak you out about references to your son, but if that’s what happened, I apologize.
I do stand with my fellow surf reporters in asking you to stay. You bring charm, both in your ideas and in your writing, and that’s something that we’re not chock full of. I’m the first to admit that charm is something I lack in spades.
Hope you’ll find it in your head to hang in here and have some fun. I admire your voice and your reason.
A fine pilsner and M&M blizzard please!
Ian the Errolite says
I need to stop working nightshift/ drinking so much coffee.
John, I owe you an apology. It should be my head in the basket! ( instead of up my arse.)
I’m off to Mallorca for a holiday in the sun. I’ll return refreshed and happy.
Never forget: The Internet is serious business.
Does anyone find it strange that the commentary immediately descended into miscommunication right after Jeff’s question about miscommunication? Was it the power of suggestion? Jeff, just don’t ask if we’ve ever murdered anyone!
Ian – that is exactly why we need you to stick around. Who the hell else would be going to Mallorca except you?! Have a lovely holiday.
Gretchen – I think you’re right. Jeff put ‘miscommunication’ out in the universe and it looks like it came back. Maybe he could make his next question about what we’d do if we won the lottery.
Alice in WV says
@Ian – Glad you’re staying with us, and, thanks to you, I just received a little world geography lesson today. I didn’t know where Mallorca was and Googled it. Wow! Have a great time!
@RNK – I second your notion about putting it out to the universe that we win the lottery. C’mon everybody, let’s all chant together…
For the record, I’ve only ever heard/ been aware of the term Left Coast used in a geographical sense.
I’d like a Bailey’s (Irish Cream) Blizzard. No, really.
The new Alice In Chains CD is very, very good.
LOT-TER-Y, LOT-TER-Y, LOT-TER-Y!
Keveindust, when did that get released? I have been waiting for that and dropped the ball as far as knowing the release date.
On IPOD right now- “White Punks on Dope”- The Tubes
Murdered someone? why? what have you heard? It’s a Lie I tell you! a Lie!
The late William Safire wrote about the use of “Left Coast” here: http://partners.nytimes.com/library/magazine/home/20001001mag-onlanguage.html
I stand corrected. The term “Left Coast” was originally not a political reference, but I was too young in the 70s and well, I didn’t care much for Texas when I lived there briefly. (Is Texas then the center of the world?) If we can just get Fox News to stop using the term, I just might be able to get over it and concentrate on the Rolling Stones reference instead. (Note: l do not watch Fox News, but am regularly exposed to it against my free will. Hence, the bitterness.)
I always thought that “Left Coast” was a geographical reference as well. I can’t think of a time when I have ever used it in a discussion.
“Left Coast” should never be used in polite conversation. 😉
WB in OH says
Knucklehead-I’ve always had a good time whenever I’ve visited Los Gatos. The Southern Kitchen is always a must. Last July when I was in there Ronnie Lott was having breakfast with Micheal Strahan and another gentlemen I could not name but looked like an NFL player. Pretty cool!
SC Scott says
If they could produce a blizzard that tastes like pussy, well they would be very rich. Actually would probably be better if it just, lightly, smelled like pussy. Not sure how they would get the aroma, but I would be happy to start collecting for them. Hell maybe I’ll print up business cards and pretend I’m already collecting for them. I guess my biggest fear is they would take the cheap way out and collect from nursing homes. Never mind, I’d like to change my order.