It’s snowing like a fancy bastard up here. Supposedly we could receive up to twenty inches of the stuff before it’s over. Twenty inches! And to add to the fun, the wind is starting to get cranked-up, and the electric company is doing damage control on the front-end, and telling everyone their power could very well shit the bed.
Fantastic! I don’t really mind the snow, but I’m not really a fan of the no-electricity scenario. What will we do, read by candlelight like Bucktoothed Scout on the Prairie, or whatever? Will I have to write these updates with coal on the back of a shovel, like Abraham Lincoln?
I can’t have that.
Yeah, everybody’s home today, because of the weather, so it’s fairly “active” in here. And Toney wants to clear the driveway at exactly 3 o’clock (I’m sure she has her reasons), so I’m going to have to keep this one brief. Chaos reigns at the compound.
A couple of weeks ago Surf Reporter Grady sent me an email, asking for advice on pubs and beers in London. I could’ve sent him 10,000 words on the subject, but restrained myself and sent him a few brief and highly biased opinions.
And now he’s sent me two Smoking Fish sightings, inside one of my recommended pubs and alongside one of my recommended beers. Check it out. Very cool.
I wanna go back to London, I really do. And this only fires me up more. We’ve got to make it happen; it was our Best Vacation Ever.
Thanks Grady! I hope you guys had as much fun there as we did.
And now I’d like to ask you guys for your help with something. A few days ago I was having a two-second spelling crisis, with the word broccoli. For some reason I kept wanting to give it one C and two Ls, instead of the other way around. I realized it was wrong straigh’ away, but it made me wonder…
Why does it have to be so complicated? Why couldn’t it just be spelled brockly? That’s the way most of us pronounce it, so why not just make it easier on everyone and change the spelling to something more logical?
In fact, we should do a full inventory of our commonly-used words, and adjust the spelling where necessary. What do you think? Are you with me on this?!
Good. I’ll start the ball rolling with a few off the top of my tiny Duke head, and you guys can take it from there. And here they are:
- brockly
- tenna shoes
- Wenzday
- wot?
Now it’s your turn. Please join me in straightening out this English language mess, won’t you? Use the comments link below.
And I’ll see you guys next time, whenever that happens to be. Holy crap in a Bundt pan! It’s snowing on an uphill slant out there!!
Have a great day, boys and girls.
Ohio Edison/First Energy (where I work) are sending electricity help tomorrow morning in anticipation of your needs. Hopefully you won’t be one of the people who lose thier power in this new storm. We are the people that everyone loves to hate…but the guys put their lives on the line every day to keep your power on! Be nice to them!
blony (bologna) 🙂
the company I work for (First Energy) is sending linemen and engineers to your AREA TOMORROW MORNING. Hopefully you wont have to live without electricity and stay warm. The weather guys might be wrong! Be nice to your electrical workers…they are there for you!
wendsday
tung
the ei rule sucks i after e except after c …..not always…….why?
Febuary
coming……. why is the m not doubled?
why isn’t the past tense of shit not shat?
Debra — depending on where you live, “shat” is indeed the past tense of “shit”
in college i made out/went down on a girl nick named broccoli. is that relevant?
i fuck up tomorrow and shoe. but that’s probably because of a latent fantasy about the non chimp star of Link.
Why not get rid of all homonyms too? A significant proportion of the populations seem to be doing so already, don’t swim against the flow.
hear/here
heal/heel
brakes/breaks
they’re/their/there
Just pick one and go with it at all times. When u torque out loud we all here it the same any weigh.
More snow fell here yesterday than anywhere else on the planet.
Its nearly up to my kilt!!
Guys, if I spelled the way I spoke, you’d be screwed, and I’d be wasting my time! (yesh i wood!)
Worcestershire= wooster. eg. ‘wooster sos’.
I went to see Eric Clapton last night..Wow what a show.
@Jorge congratulations on the job. Is it by chance at the foundation for the adoption of brief posts?
Words that can be spelled with one letter should be:
be or bee or bea – B
see or sea – C
I or eye – I
in – N
oh – O
pee or pea – P
que or cue – Q
are – R
tea – T
you or ewe – U
ex – X
why – Y
you or ewe – U
Did anbudee git funetik?
Treh-in (capital of NJ)
Feb-yoo-ary
flem
baloney
shaw (strip of sand along the Atlantic, usually heard after “down the”)
cawfy
Ok I think I am revealing too much of a Gawd-awful regional aksent so I will stop now.
Jason…you missed…K for Kay…..mmmk?
Don’t you hate it when people leave the “r” off of Warshington?
Go pound sand down the shaw, Jill! I like the way I tawk!! 😉
Oreegone
Newculer
Oh, and all that damn texting abbrev.
Did y’all = Jaw
Do what? = Dwut?
Fifth and Filth = Fif
Pussy = Cunt
suenommy
Must a git snowed in down there in the perogie belt. eh!! Jew loose powah aslo??
Foster: All right meow, where were we?
Larry Johnson: Excuse me, are you saying meow?
Foster: Am I saying meow?
All of your base are belong to us.
No accent = Canadian.
Is it likely because Canadians don’t want to offend anyone that they are accent free ? IE just ANOTHER reason to say “Sorry..”.
Everyone pretty much west of Quebec sounds the same don’t they? Sort of like Californians but with the occasional “eh” and “sorry” here and there?
O yeauh, nu web site…klik my naam.
Enuff uv this, it is reedickyouluss. Nun of this makes any sents. Wurds git all jumbld and not enuff vowels are used sumtimes. Uther times rools of lanwuj syntax go owt the window. How the hell am I suhpost to no what the dam anybudy is sayin.
Wut do u want to du next kansl krismus? How the hell do yu spel this sine “?”. Kweschtion mark? Shwastika? Wut!?
All I wanted wuz a pee-nut butter sandwitch. And sum guy grabbed mi bawlz.
We’re slowly devolving into LOLhillbilly. Hurry up with that update, Jeff!