Everybody’s home today, because there’s a fresh load of snow outside. Therefore, everything electronic in this house is currently set to ON, and the younger Secret is upstairs pretending he’s Bonzo Bonham on the drums.
It’s like living in a Guitar Center, without all the bald spot ponytails, and fingerless gloves.
While I was coming home from work last night the stuff was really coming down, and it’s quite an adventure driving at the pinnacle of a storm. Especially in the middle of the night.
The left lane of the interstate was completely grooveless, so I had to fall in behind some terrified doucheketeer going 30 mph. I stayed there as long as I could take it, then entered uncharted territory and went around him. And for roughly two seconds my car was at a 45-degree angle, but still moving in the desired direction.
I stopped at the McDonald’s near our house, and the woman at the drive-thru window had a “you’ve got to be shitting me!” look on her face. Hey, weather conditions have nothing to do with McMuffin cravings, sister. Just pass me my cannonball of trans fat, and keep your opinions to yourself.
A few nights ago we attended an “orchestra concert” at the middle school, and a different student stood and introduced each song.
Before they did “New York, New York” a girl read a short paragraph off an index card (without pauses or even a hint of inflection), and butchered alive the name of Sinatra. Clearly, she’d never heard it before, and her pronunciation was something along the line of “sanitary.” Frank Sanitary.
I don’t know why, but it bothered me for the rest of the night. I can understand (I guess) a thirteen year old not knowing a whole lot about Sinatra — but she didn’t even know how to say his name! How is something like that possible?
Toney works with teenagers, and she’s all the time telling me about how little they know. A good number of them apparently believe World War II happened in the 1960s, for instance, and that Philadelphia is the capital of Pennsylvania. You know, stuff like that… But I’d never really experienced it first-hand. It makes me sad, and a little anxious.
I remember bumping into one of my junior high teachers, years after I’d graduated high school, and he launched into a diatribe about how ignorant kids are becoming.
He said he passes out maps of the U.S. on the first day of school every year, and asks students to fill in the name of each state. And they come up with stuff like Chicago, Eurasia, and “Hampshire.” He told me several kids can be counted on to get NONE of the states correct, not even West Virginia.
I laughed as he was telling me this, and he looked at me like I’d just let loose an oily cauliflower fart. There’s nothing funny about it, he assured me. I silently disagreed at the time, but think I’m starting to come around to his way of thinking.
Heck, I often encounter people who are twenty years younger than I am, and can’t attach a file to an email or copy and paste a URL. They grew up with computers, and don’t know shit about them. How? Why??
Is this a real phenomenon, or just an illusion? Do people in their mid-40s ALWAYS believe younger people are complete dumbasses? Or is it true?
All I can tell you is: my kids know how to pronounce Sinatra. In fact, they know at least a little about a lot of things. Perhaps they’re geniuses? I don’t know.
Any opinions on this subject? Use the comments section to set us straight.
And I’ll be back tomorrow.
FIRST!!!???
I’d like to think that kids just know different stuff than we do. but actually, I don’t think that’s true, unless knowing how to play Guitar Hero is real important. Second?
I have 2 teenagers who continually shock me with their “depth” of knowledge. Scary times ahead!
You mean Philly’s not the capital?
Franklin Sanitary
Second-ish?
Good Afternoon Surf Reporters…….
As the father of a 15 year old and a post-teen 20 year old, I can say with pride that both boys are smarter than the average bear, however some of their friends are dumber than a box of hammers.
And I work with a few 20 somethings whose lack of common knowledge is simply mystifying.
Isn’t there an old adage that goes something along the lines: When I was 16 years old, my father knew absolutely nothing. By the time I turned 21, it was amazing how much he had learned in those 5 years…
Kinda explains the whole mortgage thing and a few other current events…
Numero 7
eight weeeeeeeeeeee
I too, suffer from being stuck at home, but I am not far from having been one of that wonderful generation, and I was consistently surprised at how “uninformed” most of my peers were. I really don’t think it’s that hard to learn the 50 states or the amendments to the constitution. And btw, JCIII is old enough to be my father.
Top 10 Baby!
10 sucka
I love it when a song becomes a hit with the teen crowd, based on lifting a melody from an actual talented past artist, and the kids are ignorant to both the original artist and the fact it was lifted.
As a person who rents apartments to college students, I must state that Generation Y, or whatever the fuck they are calling themselves are doomed. Doomed, I tell ya!
One of my employees is a 28 year old girl. A few months back, when the reports started coming out that Castro was ill, I said somthing in passing along the lines of wondering how long he would be alive yet- Her response- “Who’s Fidel Castro”
Currently, America has an estimated population of 305,472,706. In 1975, that estimated population was 215,973,000. That’s 89,499,706 additional potentially stupid people. Generally, stupid people are stupid enough to do things in public venues that cause them to be identified as stupid. Therefore, I would venture to hypothesize that the ratio of stupid people to >stupid people has not really changed too much since your teenage years, but rather the chance that one will encounter a stupid person during the course of their day has increased greatly…but I’m a dumbass, what do I know?
Metten –
I am from the future, and I can tell you that people have gotten even more stupid that they were back in 2009.
Also, don’t eat that sandwich from the downtown deli in February 2012: The turkey is spoiled, and will make you very sick.
Catorce!!
Jeff- It’s been said that you can’t cure stupid. Maybe it’s just something you grow out of. I have witnessed much teenage ass-hattery lately and I’m not happy about it, not one bit.
I too attended a middle school event this week, featuring the steel drum band. It seems that this and every other MS music group lacks simple rhythm. I would think that rhythm is a core requirement of a percussion group like …say..a steel drum band, but I guess I’m the one who’s STOOPID.
I’m sort of “Human Resources” and in the interviewing and application completion portion of the process.
I am amazed daily at the idiots I see. Example from a file I am working on right now. Question–“Have you ever been convicted of a felony…? Answer: ” Crimaniel trust pass and simple barttery.”
You think this one could find Georgia or any other state on a map? Don’t think so.
My 13-year-old step-secret never ceases to amaze me with some of the things that come out of his mouth.
Last night we were watching spongebob ( yes, i know…) and the cartoon squirrel character was hibernating…. he asked if real animals really do that, he knew what the word was and what it meant, but told me he thought it was just a myth. Yet he believes in bigfoot, dracula and the masked bad guy from the scream movies…..
Or he has the nasty habit of tellig you some new bit of knowledge he learned that day, and he’ll just casually drop it into conversation, with a “by the way did you know that….”
Unfortunately its usually a nugget of knowledge that either his mother or I have just told him within the last 5 minutes. He seems to have no short term memory of where the facts come from, just a burning desire to educate any and all around him with his newly found nugget.
Of course he’s in all Advanced placement classes, and without fail scores 99’s on any and all of those standardized tests the government mandates.But seems surprised when we get mad at him when he can’t remember to do his daily chores, whioch have been the same for the last 4 years….
I fear for the future…
Yep. They’re stupid. And they vote.
I see stupid people.
I see them all the time.
They don’t know they’re stupid.
The Wife is a high school teacher in a “high risk” area. Some of those poor kids don’t have a chance.
No one knows who the Beatles are. Who the heck is Johnny Carson? I can’t even imagine how they’d mangle “Sinatra” (although I’m betting there’s a good chance one of her female students will be named this some day). S’ina-Tra has a nice ring to it, eh?
I love the Shining bunker shot. Read it the first time in middle school.
Teenagers scare me. They dress funny, don’t know basic geography, and their music taste is horriffic.
You average college freshman was born in 1990…HOLY CRAP!!! Thats just insane.
You would have thought that hte teacher had taken some time to coach the kid on how to pronounciate the name.
Then again, mabe they just didn’t have the time tospare three minutes on that one-to-one, just like my Thing 1’s teachers. We just found out the older Thing failed science last quarter….did I even get a note from the teach about this sudden turn of events? no, we did not. I’m a former teacher, and you can bet your ass that if a B student stopped performing in MY class, I’d be calling that parent to find out why. Or maybe that’s going too far for today’s teachers? I simply do’nt know.
Having spent 97 to 2007 teaching at a university I can tell you exactly what the problem with kids is: Mommy and Daddy don’t like it when their little darlings have their precious feelings hurt and value self esteem above achievement. As a result we have an entire generation of kids who have never learned to deal with failure, and are accustomed to getting what they want by complaining, and have never had to face the consequences of their actions.
A teenage member of my family – not my child I hasten to add – thought the leaning tower of Pisa was in Manhattan. You’d think the “of Pisa” bit would be a clue. Another spent a week “in France” and we only found out later she’s been in Belgium the entire time.
Teenagers are as stupid as they seem.
Tyrosine has explained one of the major reasons.
They’s ig’nant.
When I graduated from High School, I could write a descent book report and knew my way around the basic writing stuctures. I have encountered young adults in my business that can not even write a coherent sentence. It’s really scary that these folks are going to be managing business if they already aren’t now. Geography is out of the queston, as apparent to last years Miss Universe contestants.
I blame the parents. Seriously. There is absolutely no way my daughter will grow up to be like that.
The big issue is that they are getting ready to get socked with having to pay back 825 Billion and none of them even seem to care. We raised holy hell when Carter tried to tell us to turn the thermostat down and put on a sweater.
tiff – two words – Standardized test, they don’t care if the kids fail school, as long as they pass the standardized test, no child will be left behind…
I work around kids everyday… From the shockingly observant and coherent to the amazingly stupid I’m amazed they manage to walk down the halls. Of course, some of the teachers fit those catagories as well…. (Ima mobile tech, not a teacher).
I’m the mom of 4, one of which is a teenager (and all the eye rolling that implies) (oh shit, she just rolled her eyes at me!)
Anyways, we were sitting here reading your blog, well, she snuck up behind me, and then I got distracted and she was scrolling so she could read LOL.
I’m constantly amazed at just HOW dumbass kids can be. Of course I think mine are smarter (ha! it’s cuz they ARE!) and I’m constantly calling my parents to tell them I’m sorry and ask why I’m still living.
My 14 year old knew who Sinatra was, but couldn’t name songs, or remember what he looked like. So we youtubed him.
But she likes Oingo Boingo, so I guess there is hope yet.
STANDARDIZED TESTING as mentioned by Shiny Rod:
http://www.mastercity.nl/fun/index.php?x=gallery&gid=iq_tests
This is what they use now…
Jesus, Lew in Bama – you couldn’t keep that little nugget of information to yourself? I graduated high school in 1980, and now I feel like going out front, shaking my fist and yelling at kids to get off of my lawn.
I don’t like kids, so I stay away from them whenever possible and, thus, have no comment on today’s question. My mother once employed a woman in her late twenties, though, who didn’t know who Paul McCartney was. WTF?
Happy Wednesday, Surfers!
The idiots far outweigh the decent people when you look at anyone under the age of 30.
Tyrosine,
You could not be more correct! I stand behind every letter of your post! If these parents would take a dozen steps back and let these kids make some decisions of their own so that they can learn from their mistakes, they would be much better off. Are they not suppossed to be considered adults at 18? If they would get their heads out of their kids asses maybe they would have some sense of personal responsibility!
Evil Twin,
I just read your UFO rant from yesterday! We are brethren, man! I have that Roundhouse CD, too (and every CD from Phenomenon to Mechanix -which is borderline – the rest is shit). I’ve seen them play every time they’ve been in the Bay Area since the 70s. When I was 13 I told my mother when I died, I wanted to be cremated and put into Schenker’s V…(and you guys were talking shit about TODAY’S teenagers)
Paul Chapman is playing in a Molly Hatchet cover ban in Florida somewhere. When Schenker is on his game, he can STILL blow anyone away!
I’ve encountered loads of ADULTS who don’t know that West Virginia is separate from Virginia.
Me: I live in West Virginia.
Clueless: Oh, really? I have a cousin in Richmond.
Me: rolling eyes….Uhhh, we’re a completely different state.
@ Shiny Rod – NCLB is a huge deal – teaching to test is really hard to do well. I feel for teachers today, I really do.
@ Tyrosine-
You are 100% correct. At my job I am surrounded all day by mom’s who don’t work, they participate in social activities themselves and are clueless on how to raise their kids. The kids are enrolled in every sport out there but no teams ever lose (They are all winners). The fathers work long days to support their wives extra curricular activities then are too tired when they get home to give a shit about what their kids are doing.
Stupid is as stupid does says Gump.
Take a look at the kids’ parents…
How many of these kids are suffering from undiagnosed Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS)? Can they screen for this? Just wondering.
As far as stupid is concerned, there is no cure – goes all the way to the bone.
(Our City Manager says it’s OK to wear Steeler stuff this coming Friday. Sorry, but I’m saving my lucky Steeler Tee and Steeler Starter sweatshirt for Sunday. The Terrible Towel, you ask? Not me, that’s just superstitious.)
I have a suggestion. Reduce the number of states to less than ten like Australia. Roughly the same size, eight territories. The dumasses should be able to remember that many. Simple.
As George Carlin used to say (bless you, George):
“Think of how stupid the average person is; then realize half of ’em are stupider than that.”
Just the other day I was telling a nineteen and twenty year old about my Spock encounter and the twenty year old said, “What’s a Spock?” At the time I thought that perhaps she’s never bumped shoulders with geeks, being that she looks like a supermodel. But after reading all of this I’m going to chalk it up to stupid.
Not to sound like everyone else but I have a 15yo and a 21yo. Does anyone remember multiplication tables? Kids don’t seem to even know the basics of math. I have to constantly show my kids how to do simple equations etc. Also, I live and work in a college town. You would not believe how many intoxicated ( to the point of serious consequences) we see on an average weekend in the ER. This is a small NE town (NE=New England for all you younger folks). Amazing!!!!
I was at work one Friday afternoonin October, shooting the shit with a co-worker. In the room was a “Coors Light Girl” to promote something or other. I asked the co-worker if he got tickets for the McCain rally in Scranton.
The girl asked, “Who’s coming to Scranton?”, hoping it was a rock band or something.
I said McCain.
She replied, “Who’s that?” Now I’m looking at my co-worker trying not to laugh.
I say, “John McCain, he’s running for President against Obama.”
She ponders, shakes her head and says, “Oh, that’s politics. I don’t follow it.”
i honestly think it mainly boils down to the individual.
I have raised all four of my children the exact same way and they are all completely different.
The oldest one has a great job and works with numbers all day but practically flunked out of school no matter what kind of punishment we handed down. Did she grow a brain once she was out of school?I don’t know. SOMETHING happened. It was good. I am grateful.
My senior in high school does math I’ve never even HEARD of and is going to major in Neuroscience. She’s a genius and believes Mr.Man and I to be idiots she is forced to tolerate. How did she get so smart? It wasn’t because of us, I can promise you.
My sophomore can do her work and is not dumb at all but prefers to keep a barely passing grade so she can dance and sing and do all the artsy, fartsy stuff she loves. She would be content to live with us the rest of her life. Is that the message we are sending her? NO!
And last but not least is my youngest.(My one and only son.) He can get straight A’s but will not make an attempt unless we threaten him with punishment. And the WORST part of it is that he says it’s easy. He just “forgets” to do his homework!!! A twelve year old with Alzheimers? You’ve got to be kidding me!
I think that the parents can make all the effort they want to, but the child’s personality will win in the end. Same applies with the parents lack of effort. The kid will be who they’re gonna be. Look at Miss KIA. Like I could possibly be responsible for her intelligence!