Hello Surf Reporters! I’m not feeling so hot today, and actually called off from work. This is a rarity. Sometimes I go years without missing a day. But today I just can’t do it. Oh well. I’m sure they’ll be able to endure this devastating hardship.
Before we move on… What do you call it where you live? Call off? Call in? Call out? I’ve heard all three, but prefer call off. …Yes, I have a preference. What of it?
A few nights ago I watched Carrie on Netflix. It’s the first time I’d seen it since the early ’80s. It was enjoyable, but nothing really happens until the last twenty minutes or so. Well, there’s the “Plug it up!” scene at the beginning, with loads of bushy 1970s nudity, but nothing “scary.”
Plus, whenever I watch a movie from the ’70s, I notice how the scenes sometimes drag on and on. We’re now used to quick-cuts, and those older movies often feel like they’re creeping along.
For instance: the girls who pelted Carrie with pads and tampons were made to show up after school every day, and do an hour of exercise. The movie showed them doing jumping jacks, and push-ups, and sit-ups for what felt like the full 60 minutes. It just went on and on.
I was shouting at the TV, potato chips a-flying: “OK, I get it! Jesus!!”
Also, most of the mayhem unleashed by Carrie at the prom came via a levitating water hose. I wanted more. Squirting people with water doesn’t really do it for me. I craved decapitations, and eviscerations. Sure, she ended up burning the whole school down with her… temper. And that was kinda cool, I guess. But I wanted more individual acts of dismemberment.
It was a fun movie, though. I’m glad I watched it. It’s not nearly as good as Halloween, or the underappreciated Black Christmas/Stranger in the House. But it’s certainly entertaining. What are your favorite horror movies from the ’70s, or early ’80s?
And before I move this operation to the couch, I have one more Question for you guys. During the movie, Carrie’s creepy religious fanatic mother kept saying things that made me cringe a little. She used odd phrases, like “dirty pillows.” I can see your dirty pillows. Everybody will. WTF? I can’t explain why, but it caused me to make a face like Gilbert Gottfried.
In the comments section, please tell us what words or phrases give you the heebie-jeebies for some reason. Just regular everyday words that make you cringe a little… Supper and commode do it for me. Shit! I just had a full-body shiver.
Do you have anything on this one? If so, please share.
And I’ll see you guys again soon. Notice how I didn’t say tomorrow? I’ll try, but can’t promise anything.
Have a great day, my friends.
Now playing in the bunker
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first….
“first” with no other content bugs me. 🙂
In my area, it’s “call in” and was where I grew up (both on the west coast of the US).
Supper? Not supper–say it ain’t so.
rectal prolapse kind of grosses me out
We “call in” sick in these parts.
As a kid I was partial to the friday the 13th movies and Return of the Living Dead was my favorite. But for some reason I found myself taken in by anything with Michael Moriarty. Strange.
Moist Panties
“tapioca” is onomatopoeia. tastes like it sounds. blarg.
Moist… turf…
I always thought it was referred to as “coming out of the closet”
If you go even farther back in cinema history, you’ll see even more dragging on.
Go back to the 50s or 40s; even the 60s. A movie will last 95 minutes, but the first 50 minutes are people sitting around in the lounge getting to know each other. They’ll talk about that new Roosevelt boy in office, and the boat Gerrald is expecting to buy. They’ll discuss that sash one of the ladies is wearing and the fine statue in the garden before they ever get to the ever suspenseful scream down the hallway or fainting gasp.
It’s fucking misery. Whenever I watch a movie from day gone by I always skip the first half hour or so and never feel at a loss.
words/phrases that have me cringing lately:
glamping
eating clean
I can not stand the word ‘fart’. I cringed just typing it. Ugh.
We ‘call in’ sick around here.
I used to call in sick, now I call off. People in southwestern Pa. don’t even understand calling in. They say you are not calling saying you are coming in. You are calling off. So in their mind call off is correct.
I can’t think of any words that make me feel gross or floppy. I can think of a couple that make me feel silly saying them. For instance Hippopotamus or Oppossum. I usually opt for the hipper versions “hippo” or “possum”. The kids seem to dig my hipness.
I felt pretty stupid when that HBO show Carnival was on. I loved the show and went around saying the title with the accent on the last syllable like they did on HBO, you know… carnivaaaal. Like a douche.
I love the word fart and use it (and do it) often.
a poetry break
beans beans, the musical fruit.
and so on.
BPDT
Moist.
GAH I hate that word!
Call in.
Vaginal mesh and vaginal sling seem to be flying about all too often lately, as in, “Have you or someone you know had a vaginal sling migrate to your liver?! If so, you may be entitled to a settlement!”. I’m a woman and I had to google them to even figure out what they were. I find them very disconcerting and unnecessary.
I’m out of sick days so I called in Dead
I hate the word “vegan”. Reminds me of an ethinc group on Star Trek for some reason
Yogurt. I think the hard G combined with how disgusting people look when they are eating it. Like they are eating mayonaise straight from the jar. Gross.
I totally agree! Yogurt is the devil’s spooge….flavored. BLECCH!!!
The word “wharf” really bothers me for some reason. Also, there used to be a diner we’d stop at sometimes when I was a kid that had on their menu some pre-packaged Ham Sandwich called a “Hammy Sammy.” That combination of words made my skin crawl, and still does, although I haven’t seen a Hammy Sammy advertised in many a year.
Jaws is as enjoyable today as it was in 1975.
And we call in sick. In theory anyway. Now you could be bleeding from every orifice and you would still be expected to work from home. Like the bastards ate doing you s favor having that so called option.
I don’t think I like the word “orifice”
Yep, the bite-down scene on Quint is always a pleasure to watch. Good times!!
Toothbrush and bathroom. more of the literal sense.
there’s a guy in the office who brushes his teeth 3 or 4 times daily in the mens room. When guys are in the stalls right behind him blasting away.
GROSS!
We have that guy here too. Tooth-brushin’ freaky mofo. Also have Mr. Germophobe Guy, who wears cologne that smells like Raid or Deep Woods Off skeeter repelant.
“Angina”. I know it is a medical condition of the heart, but couldn’t we have come up with at least a better slang for it by now? And “shingles” too. And for that matter I never liked “vagina” either. And apropos of nothing, a couple of years ago I came up with this tongue-twister but rarely have a chance to trot it out. This is close enough. Everybody say it with me three times fast:
Marge’s giant vagina
I must confess to being a BIG fan of vagina.
Brennan has a mangina!
Call In. As in I’m making a telephone call in to work to tell ’em I’m going to be absent.
My company has switched to an email system that notifies all of the pertinent individuals in the organization when someone needs to use sick leave. So I guess we have been “emailing off” or “emailing out” or “emailing in” since this has been in place (?). The slang just doesn’t seem to be translating into the 21st century very well.
Calling off…Allentown, PA here.
Now, we’re calling off in Allentown…….and they’re tearing all the factories down…….
Stop stealing my material
Go Ampipe!
In my youth in NY, we “called in sick”. At my present employer in the DC area, you “call out”. Not call out sick, just call out. I think this may be a regional thing.
The Shining.
Commode. Spring onions. “Do what [now]?”
.
And feel better, Jeff!
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Obama or Eric Holder saying “my people” when they mean “blacks.”
[I have never heard either of them utter that phrase]
Any politician saying “the American people” when they mean “the five people who agree with me”.
.
The racism on this site used to be a little more subtle (I’m talking to Naked, not you, Chill).
President Obama was elected with a huge majority of the electoral AND popular vote. When President Obama talks about “my people” he’s talking about, among others, me.
He’s the President, not the Black President.
Kind of a basic civics lesson, but evidently needed.
Heaven help us all.
jtb
Oh, I forgot to say…go fuck yourself.
jtb
JTB –
Let’s not forget about the gay-bashing and anti-socialist rhetoric too-often seen on this forum!
That guy Putin has me feeling somewhat exceptionalist today. Hooray for our side!
The Reporters here are a decent, responsible lot. I don’t recall any gay-bashing, and the racist stuff is so rare that it stands out when it happens.
And I trust that we can distinguish between social/political positions (e.g., anti-socialist) and anti-human positions (e.g., racism). ObamaCare, for example, which uses primarily private insurers and private providers, is anti-socialist, and I’m fine with it.
jtb
No, he’s the shitty President.
We call off in Pittsburgh.
Halloween will always be my all time favorite. It still leaves something to the imagination.
You’ll probably think I’m looney, but I cannot STAND to hear “good morning”. I can’t even bring myself to say it. People with their happy, happy, joy, joy “good morning” makes me want to barf.
“I know right” lately has had me gnashing my teeth.
I think I’m a call off person. Yeah. My ex said call out and I hated it. She also said rubbish and mum. Bugged the shit out of me.
pus.
If bees wake up and don’t feel like collecting pollen that day, do they just buzz off?
All you people suck at driving.
http://autos.yahoo.com/news/women-swear-and-flip-off-others-more-than-men-170845352.html
Jeff,
Bobbie Dooley was on Jay Mohr Sports today talking about the Redskins. I was wondering if you happened to catch it?
I’m an information worker. I call in “stupid”.
I “call off” around here in “K’lumbus, Ahia.” And I usually tell them I have “eye” trouble because I just can’t “see” going in to work today!
I’m not sure if “Alien” would be considered a horror movie or not, but I don’t think I’ve ever been able to watch it in one sitting. I don’t know why, but it creeps me out to no end! The 1983 re-make of “The Thing” was pretty good, too.
I can’t think of any words that really make me cringe, but it cracks me up when people use the words “prostate” and “prostrate” interchangeably!
Hah! I’ve seen “intestate” and “interstate” confused.
.
anal glocoma
i cant see me getting my ass to work today
I am frightened as well as amused by the almost universal malapropic usage of the word evacuate. A week doesn’t seem to go by without hearing a news report about some accident or emergency of some kind that necessitates an evacuation. This is usually described in the following manner: “190 people were evacuated from nearby buildings following the explosion at the chemical plant”. What this statement means is that 90 people had the shit scared out of them as a result of an explosion. Evacuating buildings and evacuating people mean completely different things.
Yes, I just had an incredible evacuation of my bowels. I don’t remember eating anything of a spicy nature either.
You’d know it even if you didn’t remember the meal. I call it the Johnny Cash Moment, on account of the Ring of Fire.
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Love “The Shining”
Call in sick here in Indiana.
Words that make me cringe:
Anal
Innovative
Bromance
Play date ( I know its 2 words, it still makes me cringe)
call in
not fond of the words rape or patriarchy
rapriarchy
There was a commercial about some pill you take for macular degeneration and they would say wet macular degeneration. For some reason picturing that really grosses me out.
I ‘m on vacation and drink. Can I call off
That would be “calling in drunk”.
One time I had a week’s vacation (scheduled months in advance). It snowed like a muthafucka that week, and the company was closed for three days. They wouldn’t give me the snow days that everyone else got!
.
My friend shudders whenever you say “tummy”
I call in sick but talk about others having called off (if I’m at work)
We recently launched a new lab system at my work called Soft. Everything was soft this and soft that…I had to create a “Soft discharge report” for all patients who left the hospital. Everything prefaced by soft ends up gross.
“Soft discharge report” – that’s awesome! People claim to LOL all the time, but I actually did when I saw that. Thanks, I needed the laugh.
And I don’t care for the baby talk either. Tummy, poop, veggies, yummy – great bolshy yarblockoes to all of them.
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Is Jeff Kay dead? Haven’t heard from him in a while.
I was thinking the same thing. I hope that sick day wasn’t because of tuberculosis or leprosy or something like that.
I too am concerned.
Fuck the gays, fuck the blacks, and fuck the socialist. Fuck yall too. I’m sick of your constant goddamn being offended. Fuck off.
Is socialism so passé that there’s only one actual guy left? I find that sad, somehow.
jtb
Jason, you forgot fuck the bigots.
Alabama was still lynching black people in 1981, and the Supreme Court didn’t overturn Alabama’s sodomy laws, which banned blow jobs by both gay men and unmarried heterosexual couples, until — wait for it — 2003.
So, at least in Alabama, I think black people and gay people probably have a right to be offended just a little bit longer.
If you want to be holier than thou with some reason, better move to a less bigoted state.
jtb
Exactly!
…and why is it that everyone always zeroes in on the bad things that Hitler did? What about all of the good things he did; such as reversing the economic crisis (depression) in Germany by putting everyone to work in large national projects like building the autobahn highway system, for example.
Gosh!
…….and rockin’ that awesome mustache !
I used to get solicitations from the Autobahn Society, but not recently.
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vacay
delish
Testing, testing … is this thing on?
People discussing politics in inappropriate places is, well, inappropriate.
Cringeworthy words:
Eclectic
Holla!
Uvula
Proactive
Goiter
Word!
Random