Holy
crap in a Bundt pan...
Due to the
recent well-publicized shortage of
amateur websites produced by assholes who consider themselves to be
clever, I
have been called into action. My name is Jeff Kay, and I’m an
Ugly American living
on the cusp of a mid-life crisis, near Scranton, PA. And I’m here to
serve, baby.
The
State of My Fat Ass A journal of
sorts, updated every once in a while.
--
My cell phone rang while I was at work yesterday, and it was a
California bigshot acting all flustered and frantic. He asked if I could
join him for breakfast at 7 am on Tuesday, and I said sure. But why, and
where? He'd go over the why when I got there, he said, and the where is
the Radisson in Scranton.
Gulp.
I immediately called my boss, to see what in the cafeteria-style hell
was going on, and didn't get a good feeling from the conversation. In
fact, my stomach almost came out of my ass. Big changes are afoot, he
said, and there's a possibility I'll be a "casualty." Casualty??
He told me he didn't know for sure what had been decided, but I should
hope for the best and prepare for the worst. To tell you the truth, I'm
not really a fan of any of it.
So, I went down to Scranton this morning, sat in the upscale restaurant
at the Radisson there, and was informed that my job is being eliminated.
Over coffee and croissants. I was then taken into a small conference
room, and spoke with a human resources person via speakerphone. He
discussed the severance package, and answered the two or three questions I
could muster.
Then I shook hands with the guy who came to give me the news, and that
was that. Effective April 1 I'll no longer have a job. Nothing personal,
mind you, purely a business decision. I walked out to my car, got in,
and drove home in a daze. I listened to a local talk radio show, but
couldn't tell what they were "outraged" about today.
I'm still in shock and, deep down, don't think I really believe it yet.
I've been with that company (formerly my company) for more than
seventeen years. I started in Atlanta, moved to Burbank, then to
Scranton -- all with them. It's been the foundation of nearly my entire
adult life. I haven't had to interview for a job since I was 27, way
back during a previous lifetime.
But I'm not going to sit around stewing about it, or badmouth the
company, or anything like that. They've been nothing but fair to me, and
I have no ill feelings toward them. Except, you know, for the firing
part....
So there you go. I don't know what the next few months will bring. I'm
embarking on a voyage into the unknown, and it's damn scary. At this
point I don't even want any beer nuts.
I'll try to be funny next time, but I'm not making any promises.
--
My cell phone rang while I was at work yesterday, and it was a
California bigshot acting all flustered and frantic. He asked if I could
join him for breakfast at 7 am on Tuesday, and I said sure. But why, and
where? He'd go over the why when I got there, he said, and the where is
the Radisson in Scranton.