Your Mid-Week Topic Dump, vol. 319
When our older boy was in elementary school, probably third grade or thereabouts, he told me a story I’ll never forget.
He said his teacher asked the class to write a poem about spring, something about the change of season, etc. And after a few minutes of silence, a fat girl raised her hand and said, “Can you help me think of a word that rhymes with Pringles?”
I swear it’s true, and I laughed for a good long time.
And last night, at the eighth grade “graduation,” I saw Pringles for the first time in several years. And yep, she’s apparently still snorkeling down a can or two per day. In fact, seeing our kid on the same stage as her made me a little nervous. I was afraid there might be a catastrophic collapse. But everything worked out OK.
The graduation was fairly painless, except for the heat. It was incredibly hot inside that school, and it got hotter as the night progressed.
And the speeches… Apparently they allowed kids to get up and say a few words if they wanted, and you can probably imagine the types who volunteered for such a thing. It was excruciating.
But after all the nerds and attention whores were finished with their scintillating comments, cookies and brownies and cold bottles of water were served. And that almost made up for it. The water, especially, was appreciated. I probably should’ve popped a few salt tablets before I walked into that freakin’ sweat lodge. Holy crap.
It’s going to be rough returning to work tonight, for just one more shift. Once it’s over, it’s supposed to be over. But I’m going to have to go back, and I’m not sure my central nervous system will be able to withstand such a thing.
A few days ago I was given a fancy laminated certificate there, in recognition for a full year of perfect attendance. I almost busted out laughing, but was able to maintain.
And you wanna know how many employees received one of those certificates, out of the 150 or so who work the same shift? That’s right, four. Pass the beer nuts.
Over the last couple of years I’ve learned that I’m a member of a very small minority. It’s highly unorthodox, but I actually show up at work when I’m supposed to be there. Have you ever heard of such a thing? Strange, I know.
And that, and a buck twenty five will get you a cold Mountain Dew. Oh, and a really nice certificate.
I’ve begun watching Breaking Bad through Netflix, and really like it. A lot of people have suggested it to me, but I was skeptical. I’ve started and quit several TV series recently, because they just didn’t do it for me.
I won’t tell you what shows they were, because you guys would howl in protest. It’s stuff I should love, but just can’t get into. And I don’t currently have the energy to defend my position.
But Breaking Bad is a good one. It’s got a lot of black humor that I enjoy, and the premise and characters are great. So, thanks to everyone who suggested it!
I’m also digging the new Gaslight Anthem album. Their last one was also a favorite, and I recommend both without hesitation. They’re called a punk band, but I don’t really get that descriptor. It’s just straight ahead rock, with a healthy dose of Springsteen mixed-in. Good stuff.
And I hate to do this, but I’m going to weasel out on the Thursday update. Today is June 16, and I have to turn in my book manuscript sometime in June. So, I’m going to take Thursday and Friday to tinker with it some more. I apologize, but we’re very near the end of this thing.
I’ll try to post something over the weekend, though. Probably Sunday. And I’ll undoubtedly bug you guys to buy t-shirts before the Friday deadline. Look for an email along those lines… Heh.
I’m gonna leave you now with the Question of the Day, and then prepare for my one remaining, dangling workday.
This one’s a classic, but I’m not sure we’ve ever covered it here. In the comments section below, tell us, off the top of your head, who you’d like to have a few beers with — anyone, living or dead.
I could likely come up with a thousand people, but “off the top of your head” is the key.
Here’s my top o’ the head list: Jean Shepherd, Phil Hendrie, Johnny Carson, Jackie Gleason, Jack Benny, Michael O’Donoghue, Doug Kenney (co-founder of National Lampoon, co-writer of Animal House), Charles Portis, Babe Ruth, Ty Cobb, Johnny Bench, Sparky Anderson, Bob Dylan, Buddy Holly, John Lennon, my grandfather on my mother’s side.
As you can see, I lean heavily toward entertainment and sports. If I thought about it a little longer, I’d undoubtedly start adding more “serious” people like Thomas Edison and Ben Franklin, and great writers and philosophers of the past. Or maybe not…
But now it’s your turn. Give us your all-history couple of beers list — the people who jump immediately to mind.
And I’ll see you guys next time.
Have fan-flipping-tastic day.
Now playing in the bunker
Pre-order your summer WVSR shirt here!
Filed under: Daily
Awesome.
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Beer buddies — Elvis Costello, Stephen King, Sasquatch, Terri Garr, Jeff Bridges (in character from “The Big Lebowski”), Alfred Hitchcock, Raymond Chandler, Diane Keaton (from the “Annie Hall” era)
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Two???
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I’d love to sit over a beer and talk current events with Lewis Black.
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It was hot in the graduation because old people are always cold. And after all that is why there are intermediate graduations. Old people don’t go to work, all they have in their life is to clog up the post office line during everyone else’s lunch hour. Those graduations give great aunts and widowed grandpas somewhere to be for an hour or so.
Try working for the government and see how many people just don’t show up. What a bunch of fraud waste and abuse. I pass the generals office every day, coming and going, I get in before he does, and leave after him. What a crock-o-load?
I would like to have a few beers with whoever is paying. Other than that (Barring religion and politics) : Cliff Burton, General Patton, that chick who know s she has an awesome rack and doesn’t mind people staring at her chest, Ted Williams, Phil Niekro, Thomas Jefferson, Alexander Hamilton (so I could kick his ass), Barry Sanders, Thomas Paine , Tony Levin, General “Black Jack” Sherman, General Washington, that guy who I think saved me from drowning once to never be seen again, and finally, the brew master of whatever beer we happen to be drinking.
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General “Black Jack Pershing”, not Sherman; I’m such an asshat . Who the hell is Sherman, the guy who burned Atlanta to the ground?
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John Prine, Michael Jackon (the beer expert, not the boy lover), Hunter S Thompson, Bill Murray, Robert Duvall, Richard Russo, Mark Twain, Cormac McCarthy and Darryl Ponicsan.
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I heard that Ty Cobb was a bit of a prick.
Hmmm: Jimi Hendrix, Nicholson, John D. McDonald, Robert Ellis, Chick Corea, Groucho Marx, Hitchcock is a good one too, Joe Bonamassa. And my Dad because I didn’t talk to him enough when he was alive.
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Weird. I just snorkled down a tall stack of Pringles not 5 minutes before I came here. As for beers I’d have a few with just about anyone.
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Ronald Reagan, Pappy Boyington, Chevy Chase, Bill Cosby, Frank Sinatra and Dr. Ruth!
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Mickey Mantle, Billy Martin, Keith Whitley and Larry Hagman. All at the same time.
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tommy lee jones
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We have been watching Breaking Bad on Netflix as well and have to agree with you, it’s good. Mr.Man is usually willing to try just about any TV show but I’m usually more picky about what I watch. He finally talked me into it after offering me a six pack of Sam Adams Summer Ale and a can of Pringles….
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Bill – Larry Hagman!!! Classic! LMAO!!!
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only 2 real graduations, thankyouverymuch.
I’d like to have a few beers with 1) my dad, in rode to fill him in on what’s been going on the past 18+ years, 2) Eudora Welty, because she’s awesome, and 3) Terry Pratchett, before he forgets how to swallow.
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‘rode’ = order.
adding another one – a few brews with George Clooney wouldn’t suck. Hear tell he likes to get his party on.
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Breaking Bad is the best show I’ve ever seen.
And I’ve seen dozens.
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Beers with:
Frank Zappa, Roy Orbison, Robert Fripp, Scott Tunis, Adrian Belew, Al DiMeola, Sam Kinnison, Billy Gibbons and Peter Falk.
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Let’s see, I’ve already had a beer with the following people: John Lydon, John Lee Hooker, Paul Westerberg, Bob Stinson. Who else is left?
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ken griffey jr. I’ve already had beers with Patterson Hood.
Ray McKinnon, the lead singer for the Hold Steady.
I agree about the Gaslight Anthem, I saw them last year and it was excellent. It’s pretty rare that I enjoy that many songs on a CD.
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Good Skully! I could drink a couple with Kinnison too.
Mine.. Ben Franklin, John Wayne, Jim Morrison, Dean Martin, Neil Armstrong.
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@Skully: Awesome list: yeah, you’re not a guitarist much ,are ya?
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Both of my granddads, Buddy Hacket, Dean Martin and the rest of the Rat Pack, George Orwell, WC Fields, Winston Churchill, John Belushi, Jack Nicholson, Anthony Hopkins, and Brook Shields at age 21, just so we have one girl there to ogle.
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I’d invite Jesus Christ, Adolph Hitler, and Iggy Pop to my beer summit.
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Off the top of my head:
Alejandro Jodorowsky
Lon Chaney, Sr.
Ronald Reagan
Werner Herzog
Michael Haneke
Wally Wood
Ed “Big Daddy” Roth
Greg Irons
Camille Paglia
Rush Limbaugh
Lester Square
Forrest J. Ackerman
Akira Kurosawa
Balla Eszter
Klaus Kinski
Ingrid Pitt
Frank Zappa
Robert Williams (the painter)
William F. Buckley
John Waters
Thomas Jefferson
Gaspar Noe
Jack Kirby
Steve Buscemi
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EASY- Augusten Burroughs, except he is DRY so it would be just me drinking.
Roger Waters, John Prine too awesome choice dogberry, Katherine Hepburn, chelsea handler but we’d drink vodka, Princess Diana, Peyton Manning, and the Apostle Peter.
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Dimebag Darrell, Danny Carey and Justin Chancelor, Mick Mars, Matt Kenseth, Dan Gurney, Jason Statham, Robert Downey Jr., Sam Jackson, Jeff Kay, Jessica Biel, Jessica Alba, Jessica Simpson
Fictional:
James Bond, The Dude, John McClane, Hans Solo, Indiana Jones, Tim Riggins, Lyla Garrity and Tyra Collette
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Jeff, I am so happy that you mentioned John Lennon because I’ve been telling myself since the day I started drinking when I was sixteen that if I could back in time and have a beer with anyone, it would be John Lennon.
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@Evil Twin
I think you made up a couple of those.
=8^-)
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@Chuck in Belpre -
No, they’re all real people who I greatly admire or would like to sit down and have a beer with, for one reason or another. I’d be happy to elaborate on any that you may have questions about!
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My other choices would be Paul McCartney, Dave Matthews, Pauly Shore (from the early 90′s), my deceased grandpa, Jerry Garcia, and as dumb as it sounds, my boyfriend, but I drink with him all the time, he’s just a fun person to drink with.
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Ooo, I forgot fictional: Sam and Dean of Supernatural, The Ghostbusters, Wayne and Garth, Randy Marsh, and any character that Ryan Reynolds has played in the past 10 years.
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What would possess anyone to allow kids to give a “speech” at such a function??? Show me the nearest noose. Phuck Dat..
In no paraticular order:
Al Pacino, Clint Eastwood, Capt Edward Smith of the Titanic, Wyatt Erp, Al Capone, Johnny Depp. I’d also like to have one more conversation with my late husband and my mon and dad since the all died so suddenly.
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I’d like to belly up to the bar with:
Dennis Hopper , Homer Simpson & Tommy Chong !
Good Times
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Frank Zappa, Rory Gallagher, Grandaddy, Marilyn Chambers back in the day
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I was trying to be mildly amusing. I’m not good at it I guess.
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“But after all the nerds and attention whores were finished with their scintillating comments”…. heh
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Nothing to do with this topic but very TheWVSR-esqu, sort of.
@Brittany – I was just doing what Jeff won’t do at work playing with the sneaky fart app while taking care of business. If that’s not enough to make a work day I don’t know what is.
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Sorry, Brittney.
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Happy Hour with Jackie Gleason would be a riot .
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Amy Sedaris, except I would probably lose half my beer out of my nose.
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Jeff Kay- like, duh people!
Stetson Kennedy
Tupac Shakur (pour a lil out)
Barack- I missed the beer summit
Henry Miller
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R.Lee Ermey, or the gang from “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia”.
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Hey Jeff, what’s with the last day of work bit? Are you retiring to live off royalties from your book?
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My list in no particular order:
Kary Mullis
Wade Davis (the ethnobotonist, not the baseball player)
Stewart McLean
Barbara McClintock
Werner Hertzog
P.T. Anderson
Peter O’Toole (prior to drying out)
Christopher Lee
Oliver Reed
Seth MacFarlane
Bill Hicks
Thomas Jefferson
Roger Ebert
Richard Dawkins
Benjamin Franklin
Wes Anderson
Michael Collins
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I’m afraid I’d prolly be disappointed if had a beer with someone I admire.
I’ll just throw back a couple pint’s of PBR with my buddy Brinkie and discuss cigars and argue about the Indians and Reds, Browns and Bengals…
Yeah, I’m kind of a kill joy today. Worked 7-5 yesterday went back in at 11pm, left at 4am, knocked back half a bottle of Beam slept from 6am till 11:30am and went back to work…I know, I know poor fuckin’ Wally, waa waa waa…
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david sedaris
sam kinnison
ice-t
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Well, I’m proud to say that I was a Breaking Bad suggester, and it warms my heart to hear that you like it!
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I left out a couple of people from my beer summit list:
Captain Beefheart
Captain and Tenille
Captain Kirk
Captain Kangaroo
Captain Crunch
Joe Biden
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Joe Biden? You mean Dr. Teeth?
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Happy Birthday, Whistle Dick!!!
What? That was yesterday? Well, it’s still fun to say.
There are some interesting choices among the Reporters re: the beer summit: Here are mine, for what it’s worth:
Betty White
John Madden
Vin Scully
Chick Hearn
Christopher Walken
Steve Allen
Bob Newhart
Keith Richards
John Adams
Sandra Bullock
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Dad (miss you)
Sam L Jackson
Jon Stewart
Jesus
William Shatner
Stephen Hawking
Justin BeeBurr (again, like I give a crap how he spells it) just so Sam can go medieval on his ass
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and then on a second night…(spelling? fukit!!!)
Jennifer Anistan
Angelina Jolie (oooh..possible best catfight EVar)
Markie Post
Marg Helgenburger
Pam Anderson
Loni Anderson
Sandra Bullock
Jodi Foster
Charlese Theron
Lucy Lu
Cameron Diaz
Drew Barrymore
Jessica Biel
Liz Hurley
Julianne Moore
Kerry from Mythbusters
Mariah Carey
Sigourney Weaver
Geena Davis
…and they all start drinking heavily an hour before me.
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I forgot Demi Moore…
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I would have beers with Albert Einstein, William Shakespeare, and Truman Capote. Obviously, I would do all the talking.
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Jean Shepherd for sure. Either or both of the Sedarises. Isaac Asimov. Richard Feynman. Neal Stephenson.
I suspect Christopher Hitchens would be interesting rather than fun, but you never know.
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@Chuck
You shouldn’t have to over-punctuate your already funny comments. If there are reporters who don’t grasp the concept there’s not much you can do about it. Between you and WB, you keep me chuckling into the night. Keep it up.
jtb
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Lord, save my soul. I’ve never heard of Ryan Reynolds, but play them as they lie. Ms Brittney, I think you might be disappointed in your time spent with Mr. Lennon. Just to be clear, I’m a Beatles fan and, more particularly, I’m a John Lennon Beatles fan (it used to make a difference). However, from everything I’ve read, after about 1964, he was pretty much a nonstop asshole. And I heard somewhere that Paul’s dead.
jtb
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Oh, Chuck, you inspire me to acts of tomfoolery. jtb
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Shit, I forgot. Happy birthday Dick Whistle.
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As far as John Lennon goes:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ef-nDlVtdoo
I hope this comes through, I can pull the link at work but can’t listen to it.
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Turn me on, dead man.
Fuck, I’m once again riding high on West Virginia’s Most Wanted. I’m afraid that only death or severe penile discharge is going to move me down the list, and I’m not entirely sure about the latter. It’s just too much fun to riff. Yup, so it goes.
jtb
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Amelia Earhart, if only to ask her if she bit the big one in the plane crash or met her maker at the hands (or rather pinchers) of ravenous giant crabs on a desert island (as has recently been suggested).
Or Evelyn Nesbit, provided she brings her swing.
There’s also any number of sports figures, like Satchel Paige, Honus Wagner, Jackie Robinson. And artists, such as Toulouse Lautrec, Berthe Morisot, Picasso. Too many to choose!
I thought about Clarence Thomas, but then I don’t want no pube floatin’ in my beer.
But over all I’d have to say my late maternal grandmother. I want to hear more about the time she went out with a bunch of slutty flappers and was shamed into unceremoniously dumping her old-fashioned bloomers behind some convenient roadside shrubbery.
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Ayn Rand
Stephen Hawking
Plato
Earl J. Hickey (to finally be smarter than my beermate!)
Bob Marley
Ronald Reagan
My Grandpa Bill
My son (when he gets older)
My ex-wife (when we’re finally able to laugh about it)
Jeff Kay (duh!)
Phil Helmuth (to find out if he’s capable of lightening up… ever)
Phil Ivey – because he’s AWESOME!!
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Probably would enjoy hoisting a few beers with most of the people here in the comments section. Looking forward to having a JB scotch (nasty stuff) and a beer with my best friend at the St. Marys, WV Elks Lodge next month. I’ve met many, many celebs, and I have found that the more famous they are, the more normal they are. It’s the untalented newbies that actually think that they are more than they really are.
Breaking Bad is awesome. Mad Men got the hype in the initial season (but still a good show) but Breaking bad has some haunting chops. Best part for me is watching re-runs of Malcolm in the Middle, and thinking, “Wow…the Dad is Walter White!” Disturbing subject matter for sure, but really gritty and could probably actually happen. I really hope this is the last season of the show. To end it and quit while they are on top would vault them into untarnished eternity.
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clintcurtis – the next season of Breaking Bad is to be the last (and I hope they hold to that, for the reasons you mentioned). The last episode of this season already aired, ending with a real cliff-hanger.
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Clintcurtis hit it right on the money!! I would LOVE to have a beer with everyone of the surfer’s here including out fearless leader, JK. How fun to have all of us in one room! Wotta motley crew!!
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out = our……………… Ugh…
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To whomever said Jessica Simpson- I bet it’s possible to have beers with her but you’d have to be prepared to hold back her weave and clean the vomitus off her tit shelf.
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Here’s some Further Evidence for today:
http://muhrgalleri.area81.se/#11.27
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Add one more to my beer summit list:
Capt. Phil Harris. As real as they come.
RIP, Phil.
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@zoe It’s usually fun and quite entertaining to have a hot dumb girl at the party. After multiple beers with Jess S. I sincerely hope that there would be bodily fluids on her tit shelf…but vomitus is not what I have in mind.
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@T Storm – I really pressed the sneaky fart thing on Jeff but maybe he was intimidated and decided against downloading it. Haha. If I had a Droid, I’d probably use the Sneaky Fart app as much as possible. I work with a lot of Indians who wouldn’t understand which would make it that much funnier.
@JTB…You’re tone is all wrong…don’t you ruin my love for John Lennon…I will stab in the face with a soldering iron.
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@Bikerchick-The same exact thing crossed my mind…we should hold an annual surf report booze fest and make the richest person on here host it at their mansion…lol
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@Hot Fuzz…OMG WILLIAM SHITNER, YES!!!!!!!! How could I have forgotten that hand talking fool?
I also thought of a few more:
Lisa Lampanelli
Daniel Tosh
Christopher Walken (I’m surprised no one has said this yet…)
Chris Farley
Mulder and Skully
Homer Simpson
Peter Griffin
Stewie Griffin
and my cat.
Hopefully I’m done now.
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@Brittney: Stewie Griffin!!! Definately!! I wouldn’t mind having a beer with Quagmire….I’m quite sure he could decorate my tit-shelf. Giggity Giggity
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Add to my list:
Randall Munroe
Neil Swaab
Marshall McLuhan
Christopher “Moot” Poole
Gary Larson
Berkley Breathed
Steven Pinker
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Bill Evans
Lewis and Clark
Doc Holiday…”Say when”….
oh…and…..t-fucking-storm, (if it’s not his week to be gay). I am sitting in “Historic Downtown Loveland, Ohio, inside Paxton’s, the table in the far corner, sucking off their free wi-fi while contemplating a third pint of Guinness. Real draught stuff we’re talking here. Yum. Ok…just two and I’ll be back later tonight.
Happy birthday zoe whistle dick!!!
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I had Stephen Hawking and I’d like to add Christopher Reeve and the actor that played Mason in the Hannibal movie so I can have them all suck back a few (I guess straw required) and then cheer them on as they race each other down a hallway.
Steve-O, Chris P and Johhny Knoxville might be fun to have there to body check them into a doorway or spray a fire extinguisher…
Weeman, The Rolloffs and the Little Couple would add the dwarf factor and we all know how important that is.
To actually sit and have a beer and chew the cud? My first list with a few more added …Gandalf. JFK. Sean Connery, Nelson Mandela, Winston Churchill , Capt Phil (CADude is right)…. this is actually tougher than I thought and I’ve included several fictional people now too…. Maybe it’s a good sign that there are a lot of people we’d love to meet and enjoy a brew.
How about location? For me it would need to be either an outdoor patio with someone like Chuck Mangione playing a concert within earshot on a hot freakin day or maybe late afternoon by a lake surrounded by mountains with the fire just getting going and the steaks marinating nicely…
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Peter North, John Holmes, Ron Jeremy and Randy West.
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Sad to report that Sebastian Horsley, the stovepipe-behatted guy who was escorted off Jeff’s flight to England back in ’08, is dead, apparently of a heroin overdose.
http://bit.ly/di0G5X
Too bad. He might have been interesting to have a beer with.
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Okay, since I’m in a better mood today I’ll play.
Top of my head is going to be tough seeing how I’ve had 24 hours to think about it. Not that I’ve spent the last 24 hours thinking about it, I spent at least three hours drinking PBR with my un-invisible friend Brinkie.
J R R Tolkien
Stephen R. Donaldson
I’d sit down with those two first, one to see how much of an influence Tolkien had on Donaldson and two, to see if Tolkien thinks Donaldson is a hack.
Philip Jose’ Farmer
Mark Twain
I’d like to see if Twain liked Farmers Riverworld series.
All of these scenarios would depend on whether or not dead people keep on semi current literature.
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DTO,
Sorry to say it but I’m slaving away in OKC this week. How often do you get to loveland?
Try to get a smoking fish picture by the big burnt up jesus.
I will be in St. Louis Saturday night if anyone wants to join me for a drink there.
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Billy Connolly
Nicole Kidman
Henry Sinclair
Sean Connery
John the Baptist (though word is he loses his head when he drinks!)
Frank Sinatra
Dave Grohl
Michael Caine
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I have a rare photo of Houdini locking his keys in his car so I’d like to ask him about that.
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Chuck, you’re killing me. That’s the funniest line I’ve seen on this site in months. For some reason, the word “rare” in your sentence makes it twice as funny as it would otherwise be. Twenty-one words. Sometimes when I’m reading Mark Twain or Dashiell Hammet I decide to just stop writing, because I can’t match genius. Sometimes your comments make me feel that way.
thanks…jtb
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Brittney,
There are those who think my face could use a little solder, but I’ve sorta gotten used to it. And I was just typing in my normal voice, so I’m not sure I can adjust m’y tone.
But there is a serious element to your comment I’d like to respond to. I don’t know who Sam and Dean are, but from your context I take it they are fictional characters.
Fictional characters have backstories. The creator(s) of the characters fill in some of the backstory, but the reader or viewer is expected to, and usually does, fill in much of the rest. It creates a relationship between the reader/viewer and the character and makes the reading/viewing experience slightly interactive. This usually causes the reader/viewer to empathize with the character and finish the book or finish the show/movie and “tune in next week”.
Real people have lives. They are surrounded by people who “know” them on various levels and, subsequently, might write about them, or be interviewed by someone else who is writing about them. We never get to the “truth” about anybody, but we create a story about a life that is updated from time to time by more information.
I’ve read 15 or 20 books about the Beatles because I enjoy and admire their work. I think Lennon/McCartney stand beside the Gershwin boys, Hoagy Carmichael, Bob Dylan, and Paul Simon as the best songwriters of the 20th century. Having read those books does not make me a Beatles expert because 1) 15 or 20 books doesn’t make anybody an expert on anything, and 2) the focus of my reading has been about the Beatles music and the early experiences that shaped their worldview rather than about their “fame” years.
So if I said, “Sam and Dean suck dicks”, you could rightly say that I’m full of shit, because your S&D backstory differs from mine.
If I say that John Lennon was an asshole after 1964, you can disagree with me and cite sources that say he was nice to everybody, you can assert that I don’t have enough information, or you can tell me my definition of asshole is just wrong. But putting your fingers in your ears or soldering my face won’t rebut the assertion.
I hope you can discern that I’m trying to be helpful and collaborative and not be an asshole myself.
I know this was long, but after Chuck’s longwinded, neverending story about Houdini I was inspired to keep typing.
In closing, I admire your passion about music, and share that passion. I’m envious that you get to travel around and hear a variety of live music. I’m getting a little old to do that. I hope you’ll never stop rockin’, and I think you’ve added much to the site.
best wishes…jtb
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Missed you guys, been moving again and trying to get settled. Not to be hokey, but with love to have beers with the wvsrs.
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Hi, Not O…
Still out west, or are you back in the arctic? Haven’t heard from you since t-storm got drunk.
jtb
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I’d also like to have a beer with Adam. Find out if Eve was nice or a royal pain in the ass. I’m guessing she was a pain in the ass. It’s not like Adam had a lot of options.
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Since I read all the comments first, you guys have already provided me with too many I readily agree with.
I’m a history buff, so definitely
Founding fathers
Abigail Adams
Sally Hemings
George Carlin
John Belushi
John Candy
Chris Farley
Jimmy Buffett
Many beers with
Jaime Pressly
Nadine Velazquez
My ancestors, male and female lines, going back, at least, 200 years. Hear how it was for them and see if I bear any resemblance what so ever personality wise to them.
I doubt I’d want a beer with Jesus. Better be sober for that one. Or maybe not.
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Yeah, I guess Jesus would be the one pain-in-the ass guy who wanted wine instead of a beer. There’s always one.
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i’d drink a beer with my dog.
wait.. i do that all the time.
he’s my dog after all.
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Hot Fuzz…too funny
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@JTB…First off, I was kidding. Second of all, I was quoting Christopher Walken from the movie Joe Dirt…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XmrgwpcfXZ4
Second off, I did hear that John Lennon was a major asshole, but I’ve loved him since I was a kid and will continuing doing so, but I do agree with you in that aspect.
Third, the thing about drinking with a fictional character is simply for the fun of the question Jeff asked. I am well aware that they are real people and have real lives and are nothing like the characters. Sam and Dean are characters from a show on WB called Supernatural. I guess you just didn’t see the humor in any of my comments…
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Brittney-That explains how you knew what a soldering iron was. I mean how many women know what a soldering iron is?
I’m also proud to say I’ve never watched Joe Dirt in its entirety.
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Only in my beloved West Virginia…………
http://dailymail.com/News/PutnamCounty/201006170901
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Haha, actually my boyfriend is a welder too, so I actually do know what it is! Lol.
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I’d like to drink beer with whoever it was that invented gravy.
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Was I supposed to use whomever instead of whoever?
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I you are already dead is it gravey instead of gravy?
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Thank God I wasn’t faced with a welding torch. My beard singes easily.
And I’m sorry that I’m constitutionally incapable of watching Joe Dirt. I’ll probably forever be culturally illiterate.
Any chance that some of TET’s beer peeps were in that movie as well? Maybe that’s why Chuck and I have never heard of half of them. Were Alejandro Jodorowsky and Gaspar Noe in Joe Dirt? That would account for TET’s admiration of them.
And if Wally Wood isn’t a porno actor, he damn well should be.
I’m just sayin’.
jtb
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Well, Steve Allen, who wrote “Gravy Waltz”, is a guy worth having a beer with, or was. Whomsoever waltzes in gravy will soon be rolling in it.
jtb
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Haha, why is everyone dissing Joe Dirt? It was hilarious. Especially after 4 or 5 beers.
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According to the interwebs gravy is thought to have originated in Egypt around 3000 BC.
Off the top of my head I thought it was a French dude.
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I’m related in some obscure way to Amelia Earhart. Family lore has it that Amy wasn’t all that good of a pilot. Sort of a Douglas ‘Wrong Way’ Corrigan with a uterus.
I’d still like to talk to her though and ask her why she didn’t take the bus more often.
That’s all I have.
At this time.
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I can only speak for myself Brittney, I dissed it because nobody can be as clueless as Joe. But wht did I like Dumb and Dumber? Hmmm, maybe I give Joe another chance.
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LHR-I’d like to meet the person that invented the gravy boat. I’d burn my lips trying to drink gravy straight out of the skillet!
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Yeah, I think it was Ramses du Jour, WB, so both of your personalities were right.
By way of confirmation, I once had some gravy at Denny’s that tasted older than France and had some sand in it.
jtb
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wht? “why”
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jtb, lol
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I forgot a couple.
Warren Haynes and Alan Woody (RIP).
WB in OH – if you ever have a cupa two tree beers with Stephen R Donaldson, I want to be invited!
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Joe Dirt actually scored an 11 on the Tomatometer at Rotten Tomatoes. Just nipped by Casablanca at 97.
I’ve honestly never seen an 11 at RT. Usually the studio can provide blow jobs for a couple of Web critics to bring the TM up to 20 or so. I’m stunned, because I’ve never seen a Gaspar Noe film score so low.
jtb
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Skully-Absolutely, the waiting is killing me for the next TC book.
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Yeah I dunno, whatever. So I heard something on Tosh.0 last night that made me laugh for about an hour…
Daniel Tosh asked his veiwers what their plans for this summer were, and someone responded,
“I will tounge punch your mom in the fart box, and then go read a book.”
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all summer?
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Heads up! Marie C’s frozen dinners and SpaghettiOs are being recalled for risk of Salmonella contamination.
http://wtop.com/?nid=111&sid=1983825
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But more importantly, who do you want to drink with tomorrow?
If the answer is T-Storm and you will be in St. Louis (Missouri, not Saskatchewan) tomorrow night you are in luck!
I’ll be seeing The Saps (Which is an awesome band from Chicago) at Off Broadway and between about 6 pm and 9 or 10 debaucherizing other parts of South City.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LHevEtQOkro
Brit, drive on down from Chicago, or hop on Southwest for the paltry sum of $305 round trip per person (plus Southwest is giving extra frequent flyer credits to fly to STL right now).
Just sayin’…
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In the just saying category, I have been told that
Mr. Gleason was a major A-hole. His son- in- law was
the source; cause and effect ? Who knows, just
reporting .
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Beer with:
Marilyn Monroe
Mae West
actually, any blonde with a nice rack will do…
if I want conversation it won’t be with a beer.
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Nicola Tesla for a beer break. Breaking Bad is all that, one of the few “shows” I bother with. And thank you Hulu.
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The little light that comes on in your car to tell you that your oil is low looks nothing like an oil can. The other day the light came on in my limo and the driver asked me what could be the matter. I told him that it appeared the car was low on gravy (or gravey).
I’d like to have beers with:
Jeff Kay
The Entire Surf Report Team
Gen. Gorge Patton
Van Gogh (just to see how fucking crazy he is)
President Franklin Pierce
Christopher Lloyd
Myself when I’m an old ass man
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Hey, I LOVED Joe Dirt! Sure it was goofy and predictable, but it had some nice moments, I thought…
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I’d like to have a beer with The Earl of Sandwich.
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my husband just said he’d like to sit down with adolph hitler, just so he could say, “what the fuck were you thinking?”
the only reason i haven’t murdered him in 44 years is that he makes me laugh.
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T-Storm…The highlight of my trip to STL was Busch Stadium because of my love for Busch Light. I love how hick it is and how it seems to only be appropriately drank out of a can in a trailer park. My friend who moved to the city a few years ago told me that her friends were in awe in disbelief to find out that her and I consumed Busch light in bottles when she lived here. But alas, it’s true.
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