Your End of Week Topic Dump, vol. 4
Speaking of McDonald’s… I know a guy (purposely vague) who is friends with an assistant manager at one of their restaurants, and she regularly supplies him with bags of Big Mac sauce.
That’s right, bags. Apparently they’re designed to be loaded into some sort of condiment-shooting caulk gun, and she gives this guy a couple of the things every two weeks.
“What do you do with them?” I asked. “Keep one on the console of your car, and take a hit every half-mile or so?”
Good God.
Over the last year or so people have started using the phrase “Really?” in a different way, and it bothers me a great deal. It’s hard to explain, but they say or write it as a response to something they think is ridiculous.
I didn’t realize it, because I never watch the show, but this aggravating trend was apparently triggered by Saturday Night Live. Or are they just mocking it? I don’t know, but “Really?” is REALLY starting to piss me off, and making me want to start kicking sex organs.
“Good times” is over, too. I’ve used that one here, but won’t again. And I’d like to pretend it never happened, if you don’t mind. “No worries” is on the bubble, as well. Teetering, ready to become annoying…
What other trendy phrases need to go? We must keep on top of it.
A few days ago I wrote about how I was accepted into the FBI agent training program, back during a previous lifetime, and mentioned a friend named Tim. He was in the Army at the time, and was pulled aside and asked questions about me — while stationed in Colorado.
Well, after I published that piece, I received the following email from the very same Tim:
Man, I remember that day. I’m sure I’ve told you all this before, but you’ve triggered the flashbacks now.
I got orders that I was to report to the C.I.D. the next day, which was like the Army’s version of C.I.A. At the time, I was working in a job where I dealt with a lot of top secret information, so I assumed I’d done something really bad.
I couldn’t sleep that night, going over in my head what communist I might have accidentally talked to or what paper I forgot to shred.
So I get there looking very guilty. They call me back to this room where one humorless guy was waiting. I sit down and he lets out an exaggerated exhale and says, “So, do you know a man named Jeff Kay?”
Wow, my jaw hit the ground. I couldn’t imagine what you had done. After he said you were an FBI candidate, it was like I was in the Twilight Zone. Here I was, in a windowless bunker in Colorado, being asked by the FBI if the man who drank more beer and vandalized more property than any human I had ever known, was qualified to preserve and protect the Constitution.
Of course I said yes. I think I also told him he’d never have to worry about you backing out at the last minute: “I stake my reputation on it.”
Funny stuff. Someday I’m going to request my file, through the Freedom of Information Act. I checked into it once before, and it costs something like a hundred bucks in “processing fees.” But someday I’m going to do it. I want to see what they collected on me, especially from my high school teachers(!).
According to the spam-catching plug-in I have installed on this site, 45,736 spam comments have been blocked to date. Can you believe that? Forty-five thousand! Man, that’s a lot of penis enhancement and Rolex-style watches. Sweet sainted mother.
Also, according to RescueTime, I’m wasting my life away. They send me little alerts, periodically, to remind me of this fact. And it’s much appreciated.
I bought the new Eels album on Tuesday, and it’s great, as usual. It’s a break-up record, so the subject matter isn’t exactly uplifting. But the songs are solid, and not overly depressing. A few of the reviewers at Amazon disagree, but what are you gonna do?
This is another album I’m enjoying. It’s not well-known, but really, really good. Here’s a glowing review, and I recommend it as well. There’s some kind of strange magic in that thing.
And speaking of CDs, I was scrolling through my wish list at Amazon a few days ago, and noticed this freakiness. What in the mop ‘n’ glo hell? Twelve thousand dollars?! Last time I looked, you could pick that thing up for about ten bucks. What happened? I’m totally confused.
Have you ever heard of Scott Wilk and the Walls? Well check it out: an ultra-obscure blast from the New Wave era. The dude released one killer album in 1980, full of great songs, and was quickly dismissed because he sounded EXACTLY like Elvis Costello.
I’d never seen that video until a few days ago, and it’s pretty much the way my hair looked in ’80, as well. <full body shiver>
I neglected this site for the last four or five months of 2009, while I was writing my “book,” and I’m having fun getting back into it. The updates this week have been more focused, and I want to keep it going that way. Except for the topic dumps, of course…. It feels right again.
Last night I installed a plug-in that adds a Retweet button to the end of every update, and I hope you guys will use it. If you read something you think is sorta funny here, please consider hitting the button and sending it out to the twitterverse. I’d be much obliged.
I have some ideas for the near future, so stay tuned. I’m jacked up about TheWVSR again, and think it’s going to be an exciting year.
One thing I’m considering is an attempt at podcasting. I sounded like hillbilly robotics on those radio pieces I did with Jack Boston, but think I can do better now. And for the first couple of episodes (is that what they’re called?), I’d like to answer reader questions.
So, if you have any questions about the website, or anything loosely associated with the ridiculousness here, put it in the comments and I’ll try to answer ‘em. Some things are off-limits, of course, but I’ll do my best to give you an answer, from the Surf Report broadcast studio (AKA our dining room table).
Thanks for stopping by every day, and I’ll see you guys next time.
Have a great weekend!
Filed under: Daily
Nummer One!
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Heyooo
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NUMBER 4!!!
FUNNNIEST PICTURE EVER!! CAN;T WAIT TO READ THE UPDATE.
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Could’ve done without the picture. Eating lunch here.
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Yea for Friday updates!!! 5th!! Now to go back and read, LOL!!
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Woo hoo top TEN
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My burning WVSR question is: What the hell happened to Sunshine and Mumbles? We haven’t heard about them since Thanksgiving or thereabouts. Are they still stranded in Arizona? I want — nay, demand — a full podcast’s worth of explanation.
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Twelve thousand dollars, plus $2.98 shipping. Can’t forget that.
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I am glad that your passion for this page has been reignited Mr. Kay. And thanks for making me feel like an asshat for using one of my favorite phrases. Really?
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OK- did i miss something? that picture has nothing to do with the update but I must say it cracks me up regardless.
Happy Friday Surf Reporters!!! This is the weekend when we find out the Colt’s are going to the Superbowl again!!! HOORAH!!!
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Doesn’t that pic say “weekend” to you, TILLY? It does to me.
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Really? Really Jeff Kay? You like the surf report again? Yeah, that came from SNL and it has got to go. When people say it what i actually hear is “I have no idea what clever is, but I’m faking it with all I got.”
I nominate “going forward” for immediate expulsion from the lexicon.
“bff” howver, still has legs.
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I have some records/tapes/cds at home that I could sell for a lot of money. But – I would never sell my stuff, and I would feel bad taking that much money off of someone.
That was a great show. I believe Danny what’s his name now plays in a jamband.
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Pete and Pete always irked me. I saw it as the downfall of Nick, as they proceeded to put out even more horrible shows with real actors instead of cartoons for year (currently, see “Big Time Rush”). The smaller Pete seemed to balloon by about fifty pounds every year and has now floated off into the stratosphere. He was continually on the lameass game shows that Nick produced before his demise.
Im sure that $12,000 dollar acquirement will never be met.
However, as mentioned before- “ICarly” with the young hot Amanda Cosgrove is the shit. (I’m sure the internet police will be banging on my door tonight).
Scott Wiik is a cousin of a guy I hung out with in the Bob Evans days. Never predicted stardom (somewhat) for him and am completely blown away that hs name has come up years later. Your topics are really out there JK.
Although you soUnded like hillbilly robotics with Jack Boston, I’m sure that is how most of us would sound in FM.
A trendy phrase that needs to go, and has been around for about fifteen years, repopularized by “The Office” is “That’s What She Said!” Every uptight engineer seems to use it at my job, thinking it will provide a cascade of laughs within earreach. I just want to kick them in the balls every time they say it.
On IPOD right now- ” Chocolate Salty Ball”- Chef (issac Hayes
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Sorry, I meant “Balls”…., Chocolate Salty Ball was sung by Adolph Hitler
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That’s What She Said
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I love me some Friday updates!! Glad you’re energized, JK. Me too! I need to get my comment on again! I’ve missed me… oh, and you too…
I have no burning questions, I’m sorry to say. I like the stream of consciousness craziness… let it flow!
AWG — Chocolate Salty Ball by Adolf Hitler ROFL Nicely said..
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I apologize to the dead awesomeness that was Isaac Hayes, for spelling his first name wrong. Sorry, bro!
On IPOD right now- “Jesus Walking on the Water”- Violent Femmes
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JK- yes i suppose it does just scream weekend…..and aerobics!!!
the phrase that I want to disappear forever is “WHATEVER” in the snotty dismissive way that my precious daughters use it.
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Glad to hear this ain’t the redheaded stepchild any more.
A phrase that I hate: “I know, right?” Annoying people say it when they are agreeing with someone’s comment. The “I know” is said as a statement, and is followed by a “right?” that’s heavily inflected as a question. Very, very annoying.
And as I’ve mentioned before in this forum, “I’m just sayin’ ” has outlived its usefulness.
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Questions I want answered:
1. How the heck is it possible that in the ten years that this site has existed, Nancy and Nostrils have never stumbled across it? Just about everyone Googles the people they know once in a while. A search of “Jeff Kay” results in TheWVSR popping up in the number-one position in Google. A few years ago you got very surreptitious with your Eninen updates, posting them on “secret sites”; so maybe you did get “found out.” Details, please.
2. Same goes for employers — they always Google any potential job candidates. Are your superiors at work aware of your extracurricular activities?
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And # 4 of a “Jeff Kay” Google search is “Image results for jeff kay,” with this being the lead photo: http://thewvsr.com/getsaround.htm
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Two words whose neo-usage need to be retired:
1) resonate
2) traction
As in: when something resonates with the general public, it tends to gain traction.
Makes me think of a tuning fork mounted on a set of snow tires, or something
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I don’t watch much regular TV so I never did know what ‘That’s what she said’ meant.
‘Like a fat boy loves cake.’ That can die now.
i’m just sayin’.
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When people use the word “Abdolsutely” 73 times in agreement to what you’re saying in a 2 minute conversation.
“She has a big ass.” “ABSOLUTELY. She should put the potato chips down “ABSOLUTELY!” “Well, I’m going to wax my bush. “ABSOLUTELY”
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@Swami- i have always wondered the same thing. How could they not find this. Maybe they have and that is why they don’t come visit anymore??
I am assuming that Toney reads the site- is that correct? How about the secrets do they know about this and follow?
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“Pull that thread”, as in look deeper into a particular issue. Any use of the term “per se”. I’m always hearing that some situation’s “not a panacea”, but nothing seems to ever be a panacea. I hate discussing the “slippery slope” that a decision may lead to; I’d rather just stick to the matter at hand.
In addition to the dismissive use of “whatever” as a response, people who are actually telling a story get so lazy that they say “whatever” as a substitute for finishing the damn sentence! That burns me to no end; how am I supposed to care about what your saying, if you don’t even care yourself?
Streaming now: The Distance – Cake.
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Here’s another opne that lawyers and people in authority use, trying to get you out of their face:
“I understand!”
“My case has taken two years just to get into the courts and I have paid you a fortune. I’m going broke waiting.”
“I understand!”
“Other cases have come and gone since then and I don’t know why this is taking so long.”
“I understand!”
“I haven’t recived a raise in tow years, but since two people were let go in my department, my workload has tripled”
“I understand!”
Dicheads!
On IPOD right now- “Date Rape”- Sublime
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Goddamn! My typing skills have deteriorated a lot.
“one”, “received”, “two” and “dickheads”
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i have a very no-care attitude and tend to say “it is what it is” when something bad happens. My friends always crucify me for that one but i quite enjoy saying it.
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JK: Glad to hear you’re hotter than new love about the Surf Report again. Your talent for noticing and reporting on the things most people blindly overlook is why we tune in everyday.
“My bad” is the phrase that gets under my skin. I know quite a few people that use it way too much. Whether they do or say something wrong…”OOPS! My bad! I meant…..” Just bugs me.
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I am just sayin, if I hear you correctly, going forward, we can take the initiative to keep this on our radar and get everyone on board so we can be on the look-out for the worst case scenario otherwise someone will get thrown under the bus or whatever, right? If we have enough buy-in we can circle back around, touch base offline, be competitive and leverage all of our efforts to drill down to the crux of the problem so we can expedite and be on target with the reduction in the bandwidth of these over-used phrases.
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My Question: How and why did the Smoking Fish become the symbol for the WVSR? Why a smoking fish?
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Ok, first of all, that Bunker Cam picture is going to give my nightmares for DAYS. Where do you find this shit?
“Kudo’s” needs to leave now. Makes me want to put a pencil thru my eyeball every time I hear it.
Ok, I’m done now.
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Good Afternoon Surf Reporters…..
I’m with MlBerry…
we were kind of left hanging on the Sunshine & Mumbles saga. One minute there was going to be a traveling circus of kookery at the Kay compound, then the 83 Chevy van shit the bed.
After that…… crickets.
I’m trying to think of catch phrases that need to go. The only one right now that sticks in my craw is my sales manager overuses “that’s what she said when the bed broke”.
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Yes, the bunker cam is especially disturbing today.
“Just sayin’” gives me a rash, as does “My bad”. There are others, I’m sure, but those are at the top of my list.
Happy Friday, Surfers! Jesus, I wish it would stop raining FOR FIVE FUCKING MINUTES.
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I made the bunkercam pic my wallpaper today.
I know I have axed this nine times before, but does anyone recall an index of old bunkercam pictures that were posted before? Did I dream this?
On IPOD right now- “Until it Sleeps”- Metallica
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@Angry White Guy:
#1 icarly teaches girls to be prostitween camwhores. not that there’s anything wrong with that.
waitasec.. there is.
#2 sublime SUCKS!!!! they’re a much better band since the singer died.
#3, i wish you had a blog.
it made me sad when you stopped writing stuff here. at least we get you on the comments
#4 Pete and Pete was the best show that nick ever had, except (arguably spongebob)….
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oh, also…
i wanna name my 1st son “Isaac hayes (mylastname)”….
any girl that says “no” to that gets dumped.
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My 10yr old tags the end of a story that happened to him a year or two ago with “good times, good times” and he does it with such sweet sincerity and a little shake of his head, I love it.
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I’m not the only one who found the joys of WSVR via ads vs Reality! It’s time to break open the ole piggy bank, grab that camera, & start the colonoscopy countdown there is a World of fast food just waiting to take away our will to live & we need to see it!
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My former business partner was from India.
Aparently a word sounding like”ah-cha” pretty much means the same as the English “uh-huh”.
So when I was explaining something long a drawn out (computer business) he would say this after every sentence and it pissed me off!
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HEY!!!…she said she would never let anyone see that picture, Pabst always makes me get a little crazy.
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i think tilly wanted to know what was hot when i was in elementary school—-capt. midnight decoder badges and glow in the dark tom mix spurs. no tv in those days, so fads spread a lot slower.
i’ve been away from the computer for a few days, so sorry the answer was late.
my husb. wanted me to say that bustles and velocipedes (that bike with the big wheel in front) were hot too, fuck him.
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The term, “Sizzle” is one I am rapidly getting tired of.
The bunker cam shot looks like Judy Garland taking a break during the filming of “The Pirate,” where she performed the song “Be a Clown.”
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PS: in the 1960′s i sent 100 dollars to fidel castro. almost kept my brother out of the CIA. he’s retired now, so i guess i can tell that. they drove everyone who knew him crazy by asking endless questions and scaring the shit out of all his high school and college teachers.
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I nominate “stimulus” and “back in the day” to be banned.
I am guilty of saying both.
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phrase to be banned: people that end a sentence with “and what not”
word to be banned: whatever. it’s all I can do when someone replies with “whatever” not beat the living hell out of them..
song in my head right now (heard on the local community cable channel this morning) Closet Chronicals by Kansas
one of those lost classics
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Dorothy- WELCOME BACK!! was wondering about you.
Capt. midnight decoder badges sound awesome!!
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SkullyWV: Thank you for clearing the origin of “a-cha” up for me. My husband says that all the time. Says he picked it up from living with a bunch of foreign exchange students from Pakistan back in his lean college years. I’ve always wondered what the fuck it meant.
I’ve been trying to spread the word “hinky” around. Not that I invented it or anything, but I like it. Though maybe I won’t in a year or two if everyone is saying it.
Anyone watching Conan tonight to see exactly how outrageous he’ll get?
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I am so tired of walking up to the bar and sitiing down and a really hot looking chick comes up to me and says….”Please fuck me”. It’s starting to get kinda old…don’t ya think?
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I don’t think I can get rid of the term ‘really’, I’ve seen someone on here complaining aoubt it before because they thought, it meant to mean that the person really didn’t believe what they are saying. When I say ‘really’ it’s typically because I don’t have anything to say but think that is would just be rude to say nothing. It’s kind of like ‘Is that right’ or ‘You don’t say’.
‘You don’t say’ might be used a little more sarcastically by me when someone is stating the f’n obivious but it makes me chuckle because if reminds me of an Ernie & Bert sketch:
Ernie on the phone: ‘You don’t say, You don’t say, You don’t say’ – Hangs up the phone.
Bert: ‘Who was it?’
Ernie: ‘He didn’t say’.
teehee
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@ Tilly – I agree that ‘Whatever’ should be ruled out for snotnosed teens, but should once be allowed after the age of about 24. This is the only polite way I know to tell someone that I don’t care about their fuck’n opinion ( I don’t used attitude what I say it though).
@ Jeff – that top pic speaks weekend exactly where….
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Duh ‘ I don’t use attitude, bad typing. Fingers working quicker than my head.
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I have thought of several phrases while sitting at my desk praying for death this afternoon:
-I’m tracking. As in following the conversation. What are you, a fucking VCR?
-That’s booty son. As in, that sucks. Makes my blood boil.
-Using the word son as a term of endearment. Makes me want to punch people in their baby makers.
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‘just sayin’
too soon?
good times
it is what it is
really?
I’m guilty of overusing all and I don’t plan on stopping. I don’t use the last two much, but I do tend to use the others especially when what I said was really inappropriate.
I know, right? is pretty annoying, especially if you heard it 8 times in one conversation.
NP Elvis Presley – (Marie’s the name) His latest flame
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Zazu – that’s every day I go in to the office..thank god I work from home most of the time and can pick and choose the background noise….
AWG – “one”, “received”, “two” and “dickheads”…I think I saw that one on youporn.com
“you know what?” “I’ll tell you what” ….drive me nuts…I’m right here, I’m nodding, just keep talking without checking to see if I’m paying attention.
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@hotfuzz – it was almost a direct quote from a project meeting I went to today. Sigh….
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Two I would like to start (since i use them all the time) are effort and action as verbs….”we’re efforting that as we speak”…”the team will action that by end of day”….they’re my little contributions to the world….and Zazu can add to the paragraph!!!!
and btw….”it is what it is”
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I’m gonna action her right in her pie hole.
She’s efforting to not choke. Or giggle.
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that’s what she said
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I cannot stand this (new to me) phrase that has apparently been around for some time. It is now being used by politicians (ugh) and “professional” newscasters!
“We will speak to that____________” (fill in the blank).
WTF does this mean? Whatever happened to “We will get to that” or “We will discuss that” or ANYTHING but this “speak to” crap. Wotta bunch of nonsense…
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The more of these I read…the more I hear Lumberg from Office Space
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I also can’t stand “speak to that.” “…perhaps you would care to speak to our current marketing effort.” Response (in my head), “I’d love to speak to it, but I don’t think it’s gonna answer.”
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“synergy” needs to go. as well as “paradigm” ….
also “Broaughhihioelkwrl;” (douchebag “bro”)
“like”
“i heard that”
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@DTO keep dreaming son! Know what I mean!just sayin;)
I have a bad habit of saying to be honest when I start a sentence wife wants to know if this is because I lie 99% of the time!
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I am guilty of “Really” in just the SNL way you exampled.
Funny, I am not ashamed.
Can I get that link?
to request my file, through the Freedom of Information Act
Sweet sainted mother!
45,736 possible invasions
.. wordpress plugin shoutout – open source is a beautiful thing.
¿ Grab the Music From the Adventures of Pete & Pete
for 349.99 while-you-can ?
My Podcast Question:
(and yes I still have the drab Jeff Kay Jack Boston Shorts-yes all of them, backed up.)
Why did it take GOADING for you to reveal The Secrets after several years of successful online writing?
Better still, how much did it stretch your creativity, by forcing them out of your available content?
I was most impressed by your writing after learning about the secrets, for this reason.
Bonus Podcast Question:
What are your internet photo sources for the Bunker Cam?
(Cause that gets bizarre)
..also stop announcing the podcast.
Are you serious this time?
I hope you are.
Let me know when you are ready to do it LIVE!
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I use “It is what is” in lieu of “quit your fucking bitching.” Keeps me employed.
Also, way off topic, but as calendars were previously discussed, if anyone has a portuguese water dog and wants free calendar (2010) depicting them, let me know. My child’s sitter bought me one because I have a Newfoundland and that was the closest she could find. I know, really, what is up with that? I guess she was thinking outside of the box. I’ll even pay postage because my Catholic guilt prevents me from just throwing it away.
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the first rule of bunker cam is don’t ask about bunker cam.
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ZAZU—better check the metrics on that…then stop using metrics.
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Big bagof sliders from White Castle HHHHHHHMMMMMM!!!!!!!!
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I hate it when the kids say “oh snap!” or use the word “like” thirty times a minute. “Oh snap, is like, what your neck is going to do when I, like, hit the side of your head with a 2 x 4.” STFU!
Everyone thinks that pronouncing either as if it were spelled “eyether” makes them sound more intelligent. Absurd.
I’ve been trying to get a new word started for a long time now. The word is “assrabbit”. You can use it however you’d like. For example, “Hang up the goddamn phone, assrabbit!” I don’t know how you go about getting a word started but I’m not going to stop trying.
A few other things that bother me:
Don’t say “in my opinion”. Of course it’s your opinion, assrabbit, you said it! Who else’s opinion would it be?
Why isn’t there ever a case of “polite Tourette’s syndrome”? Why do they always have to be rude and vulgar? Why can’t they shout out nice things? “Nice purse lady!” or “I love your hair!” instead of “cock piss!” or “shit lick on my fucking tits!” That’s why I find the idea of Tourette’s syndrome suspect. They blurt things out uncontrollably but it’s always inappropriate, rude, and vulgar.
Why does everything have to come with a fucking carrying case? It’s ridiculous. “You get the large toenail clippers and the small fingernail clippers PLUS this handsome carrying case. But act now and we’ll DOUBLE your order, just pay seperate shipping and processing. That’s TWO toenail clippers and TWO fingernail clippers in handsome carrying cases. All for only $9.99.” Choke on your “carrying cases” asshole.
I guess I’m done for now. I’m starting to put myself in a bad mood.
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As to your FBI background check, your bud in Colorado would not have been interviewed by CID, but by CI, which used to be known as CIC, which was the Army’s CIA. CI and CID investigate different things, and now CI is part of MI. I just don’t understand what why your friend could get confused!
Only the Navy combines CI and CID functions, which of course is NCIS. Army CI is a lot like television NCIS, except we don’t have sexy Mossad agents and Goth girls in lab coats…and we don’t get our cases solved in an hour…and we aren’t as witty…and our offices are uglier…and out clothes don’t look as good…and, well, we just aren’t as attractive.
BTW, you shouldn’t worry that someone who knows this stuff is reading your blog. Just keep writing the stuff you would if you had never seen this. Everything will be fine.
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Jason, don’t you mean – choke on your “carrying cases” assrabbit?
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I noticed that I keep hearing phrases like…”Fuck off”, and “Get the fuck outa here”. Things like, “Who the fuck do you think are?” and “Go the fuck away”… “Go fuck yourself”.They seem to be following me wherever I go. Is it just me?
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White Trash Barbie, well done. I stand corrected.
dto, I keep hearing things like, “Put your penis away!” and “Unhand my wife, fucking pervert!” and “What do you mean you’ve never paid for sex in your life? I’m a hooker, dumbass, I want my $250 and I want it now!” Seems like people are getting become ruder and ruder with each passing day.
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I know what you guys mean! I keep having strangers come up to me with dumb ass statements like; “you have the right to remain silent” what the hell is that all about?
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By the way I will never drink a Pabst blue Ribbon again as long as I live!
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“Run it up the flagpole and see if that dog’ll hunt”.
I’ll echo the What Happened With S&M? Are they wandering the Mojave chewing cacti? Are they moving in with Eninen in one of them there Carolinas? Now, that would be a comedy vein so rich…
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I know what you mean. Just once I’d like to be called Sir without it being followed with “you’re making a disturbance”.
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I went for a job when I was 14. I got interrorated by the EIEIO. Something about fucking ducks, and pigs and cows. I was cool until he brought up rabbits.
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Y’know, it’s funny…
Amazon and I are homies, really we are. But lately, I’ve noticed people trying to charge OBSCENE amounts of money for things that sooooo are not worth it. 12,000 dollars for a fucking CD? It’d DAMN well better be made of 24 karat gold, signed by Elvis, all the Beatles and Sid Vicious.
I was looking at the DVD’s the other day – I wanted a copy of Citizen Kane… but some assfucker was selling it for 400 bucks! And the list price on the site was 25.00.
Dude.
NOT COOL.
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Brand-new Citizen Kane (Two-Disc Special Edition) for $22.99:
http://www.amazon.com/Citizen-Two-Disc-Special-Orson-Welles/dp/B00003CX9E/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1264369597&sr=8-1
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Trying to figure out when and, more importantly, why people started using “addy” instead of “address,” as in “Give me your email addy so I can send you the link.” Or “I need your addy for the wedding invitation.” Is “address” so long and complicated to pronounce that it needs to be simplified?
To quote Mrs. Wally: “Makes me want to punch people in their baby makers.”
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Assrabbits
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Thank you, Brynhildr.
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Sorry Jason, Assrabbits is already in the urban dictionary you need to come up with a new one!
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Assrabbits: “Another term for asshole.
2. Crabs, when plural.
1. “You’re such an assrabbit.”
2. “That bitch has assrabbits.”
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Perhaps Jason has more influence than he realizes
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Good Point B!
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Pagan! NO! That’s MY word. I’ve been using it on blogs and websites and writing it on bathroom walls for years now. If it’s made it to urbandictionary then we have some progress. I don’t need the credit, I just want it used. Same thing goes for “vagina-friendly” (even though I certainly don’t claim to be the Thomas Edison on that). Example: I won’t shop at Home Depot because they’ve become all “vagina friendly”, selling more drapes than lumber.
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Are drapes and lumber euphemisms? It’s been a while since I’ve set foot in Home Depot.
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Brynhildr,
You’re absurdly clever.
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Also not a fan of “I know, right?” A guy I work with prefaces almost every sentence with the phrase “I’ll be honest with ya.” Jeff, my humble suggestion would be a glossary of terms and characters(i.e. sunshine and mumbles). Might be helpful to newcomers to the report. Also, could you possibly do some research to see if John Edwards might be my father?
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Good morning, my invisible friends.
COLTS, BABEEEEE, COLTS!!!
On IPOD right now- “Tommy the Cat”- Primus
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AWG!!! Yeah BABY!!!! I told you we’d do it. Super bowl bound!!!! woo hoo!!!!
So how is the diet coming and what happened with the test for the Sherriff’s dept I find myself wondering??
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Good Morning, Uhm where are the Vikings?
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TILLY- The Sheriff’s Dept job has been delayed, due to a dickhead doctor. I had to get a complete physical nine days ago to get a doctor to sign off for me to take the test Thursday. I had the 6:04 course down to 4:24 and ran it with ease. According to the results- My heart is PERFECT. My lungs are PERFECT (guess I have been smoking the healthy cigarettes for 35 years. I have the prostate of a 21 year old. The four factors that caused this asshole to not sign off on my permit was 1) High cholesteral (290). It was 240 in October and I have been eating oatmeal and taking fish oil pills every fucking day since then. 2) My blood sugar is that of a diabetic- Inever eat sugar related foods 3)Tryglicerides are through the roof (don’t even know what those are) and my 4) thyroid is so low, I should be just laying around all day due to lack of energy (anyone that knows me, and knows how hard I work and spend time with my kids knows better). Therefore, I have to wait several months until the test is offered again. Disappointing- YES. Not going to give up though
But anyways, the Colts fucking rule (regardless of what eighty idiots who work with me say) and Manning should exploit that 26th ranked secondary. Just don’t run it. Addai sucks in my opinion and they would be better to pass every time, every play. Peyton’s got five people to pass to (including Addai, who CAN at least catch the ball) and I believe this thing is in the bag.
On IPOD right now- “Rivers of Blood, Years of Darkness”- My Life with the Thrill Kill Cult
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Oh yeah, and my weight is down to 238 now. Considerably down from the nearly 300 back in OCtober.
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AWG: Sounds like your blood sample was mistakenly switched with the sample from the guy pictured at the top of this web page.
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AWG WTF? you’re gonna get kicked outta the fat kids club. then it’s just gonna be me and jeff!
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AWG- the weight loss is tremendous!!! Way to go!
did they put you on thyroid meds? that might take care of some of the other issues…..I am no doctor but low thyroid function can be bad for your overall health.
I hope that all works out for you. What a pisser huh?
I think we have it in the bag too. watching N.O. play yesterday we have this!!
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PLEASE DO A PODCAST! SAVE ME FROM THE BLACK HOLE OF NPR! (i realize I am yelling. It’s for effect).
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