Your End of Week Topic Dump, vol. 288
There’s a hole-in-the-wall Chinese place that recently opened near our house. It’s actually within walking distance of us, but I’ve never walked. I mean, seriously.
But the food is excellent (not gloopy at all), and cheap ($5.35 with tax for their lunch specials), and plentiful (I gave Andy the last two pieces of my lemon chicken a few minutes ago, ’cause I couldn’t eat it all).
And as I was sitting in there waiting for my order, I could hear all the employees talking to each other in Chinese. They’re straight off the mainland, I think.
While listening to that most baffling of languages, I started thinking about one of Phil Hendrie‘s characters, who said Chinese sounds like a dropped fork. And I know it’s horrible of me, but I’m still laughing.
A few nights ago at work a fairly-new supervisor in another department asked if I could spare one of my “people” for about fifteen minutes after lunch.
“Yeah, I’ll send Mike over to see you,” I said.
“Thanks Jerry!” he answered.
WTF?
And a woman who sits near me at my job sometimes plays an oldies radio station (at a too-high volume, I might add). It’s the normal oldies stuff: “Under the Boardwalk,” “Big Girls Don’t Cry,” “Jailhouse Rock.” But every once in a while they’ll throw in something that seems a tad… askew.
Like “Strawberry Fields” for instance. That doesn’t belong on oldies radio, ya know? That’s classic rock. There are rules in this universe…
Indeed, a few nights ago they took it even further. So far, in fact, it shook me up a little. Right alongside “Hello Mary Lou,” they played (are you ready for this?)… “Jump” by Van Halen.
And I believe it ripped a small hole in the space/time continuum.
I’m returning to the yurt on May 12 & 13. I think I can log upwards of 24 hours of uninterrupted writing/editing time on those two days, if I’m disciplined. Then I’m planning to take a week off from work sometime in June, to finish the book.
I don’t know exactly what the phrase means, but it’s nut-cutting time with my “novel.” I have to focus and get it done. I told Mr. Big, face to face, I’d have it to him in June.
Will somebody please hold me?
And since we’re on the subject… Last night after work, around 2:30 am, I cracked open a Yuengling to celebrate another week ended. My long weekend had officially begun.
Then I started eating salted peanuts in the shell. But I didn’t get a bowl of them, I was just standing in the kitchen and taking them straight out of the bag, then tossing the shells into the trashcan. And around peanut #7, I sucked one of the reddish skins down “the wrong way.”
I could feel it in there, attached to the wall of my throat, fluttering with every breath I took. And I started gagging and coughing, and almost screaming into the darkness.
I couldn’t breathe, and panic was starting to set-in. I gulped down a glass of water, but the skin would not dislodge. Tears were rolling down my face, and I was making all sorts of surprising noises.
Then everything settled down, my breathing stabilized, and I was able to continue with my beer.
And when I got up this morning there was a text message from Toney on my phone (this is how we communicate). It said, “Were you puking last night, or what? I think you woke up half the neighborhood.”
I guess she doesn’t think it’s necessary to get up and check on me, until she hears my body hit the floor? Is that the action-trigger at this point? My lifeless torso slapping the linoleum? I’ll have to text her, and find out.
Have you ever had Canadian maple cream cookies? A friendly woman at work insisted I try one, saying they’re the best things ever, and I almost yakked. It was disgusting; it tasted like a tightly compressed pancake breakfast. And while that might seem appealing in the abstract, it ain’t. Not to me, anyway.
I smiled like an idiot, lifted the partially-eaten cookie to signify my approval, then wandered off and threw the awful thing into a recycling bin.
What’s the worst cookie you’ve ever tasted? I know there aren’t too many awful cookies, but there are a few. Oh yes there are.
And I’m gonna call it a day, my friends. I’ll leave you now with a question from the Stealing Clive Bull‘s Topics desk.
In the comments section, please tell us if you’ve ever paid more than a hundred dollars for a ticket to a sporting event, concert, Broadway play, or anything of the sort. I’m talking about one-night (or day) events, not a cruise, or something like that.
If so, tell us about it. Also, was it worth it? I don’t think I’ve ever paid that much. My closest is probably the seventy-five bucks I plunked down for Steely Dan a couple years ago.
Have a great weekend, boys and girls!
I’ll see ya next time.
Filed under: Daily
Hey damnit, I’m numero uno !
[Reply]
Yo estoy numero dos.
[Reply]
It’s actually perfectly okay to say Chinese sounds like a dropped fork. Chinese is a tonal language, and since a dropped fork produced tones they are similar.
Put some bacon on the cookie to stretch the maple flavor out a little.
My wife and I paid $140 to sit right behind the dugout on the first base line at a Cardinals-Cubs game for our anniversary this year. Usually the tickets go for much less, but The Cardinals spike the price of their tickets 50%-100% when the Cubs come to town. I’me sure it will be great watching my Cubs lose.
[Reply]
I have purchased tickets to this summer’s World Cup in South Africa. I am going to see the US play and paid well over $100 a ticket. Will report back on the experience.
[Reply]
I paid $200 to see the SEC Championship game in December. Alabama won, so it wasn’t wurf it.
Funny thing was, the Alabama fans were listening to Lynyrd Skynyd, that rock band from Florida, while the Florida fans were listening to Jimmy Buffet, that songwriter guy from Alabama.
[Reply]
I’m trying to teach myself Chinese with Rosetta Stone. I’m convinced there are sounds in that language that a native English speaker is not capable of making.
[Reply]
My race tickets for Bristol Motor Speedway were $137 each for the Cup race and $72 for the Nationwide Series race. I had four season tickets. The math adds up to around $1,700/year. Needless to say, 2008 was the year I finally told BMS’s cash-gouging pricks to take my tickets and wipe their asses with them. Guess what, they can’t sell that track out anymore. Apparently, I wasn’t the only ones to tell them to sit and spin.
[Reply]
Quite an excellent post today. A little bit of everything — neighborhood goings on (the Chinese restaurant), work (we don’t get much of that these days, I miss the days when Jeff would keep us up-to-date on the wacky characters at his old place of employment), a small update on the “novel,” a coupla comments on food (the cookie and, again, the Chinese joint), and a quite funny description of almost choking to death and the wife’s reaction (I was laughing out loud during that segment). What more could one ask for? Sure, a bit of Eninen and/or S&M, but we beggars can’t be choosers now, can we?
[Reply]
HEY! Anutter early bird here! Not really a sweet eater. I like salt…a pounder bag-o-Lay’s will do just fine thankyouverymuch.
Hilarious post, I might add. My boyfriend came home 2 Sunday’s ago after being out drinking for 10 hours…when he said he’d be back in an hour…..whatthefuckever….during said time I slaved in the goddamn kitchen to make him a delicious Sunday dinner…. ANYWAY…I was fucking jacked off about the whole incident, quite frankly. He preceded to barf meals he ate 3 weeks ago secondary to the booze intake for the DAY….and did I get my ass off the couch to check on him??….FUCK NO… Don’t play games with me asshat. You get what you give.
….and you guys have a swell weekend!
[Reply]
I’ve paid over $100 for opening day Reds tickets. $80 a pice from a scalper to see the bengals lose to st. louis in st. louis.
I figure I pay next to nothing for tickets most of the time so it’s ok.
I can’t justify it for a concert. I love me some drive by truckers but I’ll be damned if I pay 50 bucks to see them.
[Reply]
Top Ten? Myself and a group of mates go interstate each year to watch motor racing for 4 days – costs $1,600 each (don’t tell my wife!) We also go to the Formula 1 race in Melbourne which is about $120/day for a grandstand seat. (all aussie dollars, but that pretty close to uncle sams dollars right now).
[Reply]
I’ve been to several NASCAR races that I’ve paid more than a hundo for.
I used to run a service truck and would get called out to make repairs on kitchen equipment at a local chinese place…I don’t eat chinese food anymore.
Worst cookie? Hmmm, I’m sure one of the other reporters will come up with something I don’t like but for the moment it seems like an oxymoron.
Oh, and welcome aboard Tinamarie. We only lack the other Dakota and Hawaii. Maybe they don’t get the internet in Hawaii?
And thanks for the update Jerry!
[Reply]
those shitty girl scout cookies, I think they have the logo on them. They are plain and stupid.
Also oatmeal raisin. I like them but they look like they should be chocolate chip and that angers me.
I think animal crackers are misleading. They make kids think all animals taste the same.
Mitch Hedberg
[Reply]
Never gonna pay $100 to see anything – at least I don’t think so.
Worst cookie? How about those almond flavored windmill shaped things. I don’t know what they are called but YUK! Chinese fortune cookies are deficient in the taste area too.
And Jerry, I like the way your wife operates. Men are such big babies!
[Reply]
Go to one Patriots game per year. $117 per seat face value.
[Reply]
As much as I hate to admit it……..I paid $175.00 a piece for 3 tickets to see………..are you ready???
THE WIGGLES
4 years later, I still throw up in my mouth at my stupidity.
[Reply]
I don’t know if it’s the worst cookie ever, but I’m not overly fond of those little cookies with the red jelly globs in the center. They’re usually found on fancy cookie trays, and I pass them by every time.
As for paying more than $100 for a ticket, I’ve done that quite often actually. Mostly for Broadway shows and concerts.
I’ve somehow managed to see Paul McCartney way too many times over the last several years. And the “good” seats always go for $250 or more — that’s usually the straight-up price off of TicketBastard for floor and first level seats. To me, it’s well worth the money to be up close, because McCartney puts on the best live show I have ever seen. Plus, the price kind of evens itself out because I’ve also managed to see him for free a couple of times.
[Reply]
The worst cookie I ever tasted… oh dear!!
Quick background: every Friday here at work someone brings in cookies. Everyone takes a turn. We call this concept “Cookie Friday”. Oh so imaginative, I know!
One day one of my coworkers makes “surprise cookies”. I walked in, grabbed one and looked at it thinking “This looks orange and creamy, must be some sort of citrus/cream cheese concoction… awesome!”
Imagine my surprise after taking a bit… turns out the “surprise” part is that it’s not a cookie at all; it was some tofu/salmon thing. That was JUST WRONG!!!!
[Reply]
I think I’ve spent more than $100 for Red Wing Stanley Cup tickets. Their first win in the early ’90′s was worth it.
When Steve Yzerman pick up the cup after nearly 20 years of busting his ass for it the roof nearly came off the Joe Louis Arena. The next two wins were fun, but that first one was the big deal.
The only other tickets I’ve spent more than $100 for are the kind that get me on to airplanes.
[Reply]
Worst cookie: anything with anise. Black licorice is fine, but don’t put that flavor into an innocent looking cookie.
[Reply]
T-storm – I’m with ya on the oatmeal raisin cookies. Imposters!!!
I paid over $100 for a ticket to a fancy-pants Cirque du Soleil show in Vegas.
[Reply]
Of course I’ve had Canadian Maple Creme cookies. I try to bring 3 or 4 boxes back in my luggage after every trip to Canada. The best ones – I think – are the SoBe store brand. Some of the stuff they pass off as “the real thing” down here in America are just bland crap. I just bought some at Safeway – I’ll let you know how they work out…….
Oh yeah – those cookies are a great snack on the long trail, too. No doubt they were in my backpack in both of those “Smoking Fish Sightings” photos you have of me up in Canada. The Princess (who intro’d me to The Surf Report) and I are going up for our honeymoon after the wedding in August. Maybe we’ll send you a “Smoking Fish” pic or two of us, munching on maple creme cookies. 8^)
[Reply]
Excellent update. So Surf Report 1.0 it took me back.
I have definitely never paid more than $100 for a ticket to any event. Probably no more than $25 and that was for the Purple Rain tour.
Puuuurrrple Rain, PuUUuuurrPle Rayayayain!
Sing it with me.
[Reply]
I was unaware that Canadian maple cream cookies are recyclable. I wonder if there are any other cookie varieties that are also recyclable.
I learn a lot from reading the updates.
[Reply]
In 1989 I paid a scalper $250 for second row to see the Rolling Stones at Shea Stadium. Well worth it. Now the prices in New York START at $100. I paid $100 apiece to see Tony Bennett.
Christ, did I just put The Rolling Stones and Tony Bennett in the same paragraph?
Worst cookie? I make it a habit never to eat anything from anyone’s kitchen I don’t know. Especially if thewy have young kids or pets. I don’t want to be wrapping my yap around some cookie FIdo “helped” bake.
[Reply]
If it’s not yummy, it’s not really a cookie.
[Reply]
Madz,
People with cats. They always let the cats up on the counters and tables and those damn things stand in their own crap.
I know this because I own one. Damn cat.
The red glob of jelly cookies, I remember those from Big Bear. Blurgh.
[Reply]
Hey, I like those maple cookies…but I am Canadian.
Most of the bigger bands that come around here cost around the C note to see, I’ve paid over that for recent Metallica and Motley Crue concerts. I’ve also paid over $100 to attend a few recent Nascar races (Dover 2007, Louden 2008, Charlotte 2009)
With the exception of racing or perhaps the Stanley Cup play-offs, I would never pay that for a sporting event that I could just watch on TV for free while sipping on cheap beer from my own fridge. Concerts are a different story. My favorite band may only come around once every two to five years whereas my favorite hockey team plays 42 games a year in my city.
[Reply]
the worst cookie i ever ate was when i was in prison….
jeff, i’m reading this in a physics class and i just sprayed water out my nose onto some kid who was already hygene challenged.
science majors… LEARN TO BATHE!!!!
[Reply]
Spent 300 each for front row (In the freakin orchestra pit!) tickets to see Dead Can Dance at Radio City in 2005. I got away cheap, sold my 2 floor tickets for 250 each after the show sold out, so it offset a lot of the cost. The people next to us bought theirs later on and paid over a grand each for them.
Even if i had to pay for them again, it would be well worth it, to be able to touch the stage and be less than 5 feet away from the performers.
Saw the Pogues in 06 or 07 in atlantic city, got comp tix for that show (thanks dad!) but it was a sell out and most tickets were going for better than 200 each…
Talked to a guy there who had tickets for the St Patrick’s day show in NYC, he sold the pair for 2 grand each!, picked up two Atlantic city tickets for 400 and had an assload of cash to burn at the tables….
[Reply]
t-storm, yep, cats. I have one, too but she doesn’t jump up on anything besides the bed.
Kids always want to help bake, too. With running noses and grubby mitts.
I think I feel my lunch coming up.
[Reply]
my husband gets migraines and pukes most times. If I don’t hear him hit the floor, I’m not getting up. he’s a grown man. I don’t particularly want anyone ‘helping’ me when I throwing up. Back in my drinking days, it was nice to have someone hold back my hair, but if I’m with the flu, privacy please. Leave me to my misery.
I’ve never paid over $100 for tickets, but it was just last week I held in my hands two $178.50 tkts to the Penguins game. A friend had just been gifted with them and I wanted to at least hold them.
[Reply]
I once paid $6 to see Van Halen open for Journey. I think it was 1978. Did I pay too much?
[Reply]
I paid $375 each for Genesis tickets- for each show and went to three in a row–Some of the best concerts ever- Phil Collins can put on a show!
[Reply]
I agree with most of the nasty cookie comments already given, with the exception of oatmeal raisin. If they’re made correctly, they are delicious.
I am constantly on the lookout for recipes, as I love to bake. I saw a “45 calorie chocolate chip cookie” option on Dr. Oz the other day…
…the chef used cannellini beans as a binding agent instead of flour. I sat there in awe and disgust, as my husband laughed.
His only comment?
“DUDE. You totally need to make those…and take them to WORK.”
I think that is an excellent idea.
——————————————————-
I rarely go to concerts, and average $50/seat when I do. I would be willing to throw down a little more if Savatage regrouped and came to Raleigh, or to see Jeff Beck in concert.
[Reply]
We had a Japanese exchange student, and he brought us a gift of these cookies, which were made with beancurd. I popped one in my mouth as he watched, and I don’t think I can describe the taste. I casually moved it out of my mouth, and into my hands with no one noticing. I pushed it in tithe bottom of the table we were sitting at, and no one was the wiser. Shit, it was a freaking bean curd cookie.WTF was that about?
[Reply]
I paid $10 to see Springstein, performing in an all white suit, in St. Louis. He was one of 5 or 6 artists performing at a theater. This was before he was big. Payed $80 to see The Eagles on a farewell tour at the Charleston Civic Center. Too bad I stopped at The Fifth Quarter accross the street, and did too many double Johnny Walker Blacks before the concert. I hardly remember it.
[Reply]
Good Evening Surf Reporters….
Would have commented sooner, but my place of employ has been crazier than a tent full of retarded monkeys.
I can say never paid more than $100 bucks for a ticket. I’ve paid over that to go see the Steelers play an away game, but that money also included bus fare, food and copious amounts of beer.
I’ve been given tix to events that were over $100. One of my bankers used to hand 2 seats right on the glass at Penguins games. I believe those seats weer a buck twenty five each. And my current boss a few years ago handed me 4 tickets to a Steelers game. He’s a season ticket holder and has the 3rd row, 50 yard line behind the Steeler’s bench. I can’t say for certain, but I believe each seat is a couple hunert dollars.
Hey, look at the clock, it’s quitting time. I’m out of here, Later taters.
[Reply]
Agree with Ethan, anise will ruin a holiday. Also an oddity, Pepper cookies. Tastes like…well, black pepper.
In 2002 we paid $105 each for Seigfreid and Roy tickets when we were in Las Vegas. Even then I could tell that one tiger was getting pissed. It was only a matter of time.
[Reply]
my kids help me bake. someone always sneezes!!…but I can bake like nobodys business. Who knows? baking it will kill the germs.
snot is love.
Cats though…ugh. gives me shivers.
I don’t go anywhere that costs any money. well, nowhere fun anyways. *sads*
[Reply]
Stuart, at least you’re ABLE to see Formula 1 in your own country. When was the last time we had that in the US – Detroit GP?
Don’t think I’ve paid more than $50-ish for a ticket. In principle I might pay out the ass for a concert ticket depending on the band, but fuck a bag of sports. At the other extreme, I paid $8 to see Emerson, Lake and Palmer in 1976.
Worst cookie was the batch my buddy’s girlfriend made: vegan zero-fat oatmeal cookies. They were hard, fibrous, flavor-free discs reminiscent of particle board.
[Reply]
I thought it was love, but it’s snot.
[Reply]
Grossest cookie-Those jelly crescents or whatever that old woman usually make on or around Christmas…Just like a ball of goo in the middle of a cookie that taste like a booger?
Jeff, Yes, I have paid hundreds of dollars for lots of things.
I paid almost 200 something bucks for Phish Fest 8 in Indio Cali (which I just finished writing about on my blog if anyone is interested, just click my name!)
I also paid over 100 bucks for two Summercamp festivals in Chicalothe, IL
Over 150 bucks for Rothbury festival in Rothbury Michigan.
1 Phish concert, and 2 day Dave Matthews Band concerts at Alpine Valley Music Theater, East Troy, WI.
What can I say, I love music fests.
[Reply]
The WORST cookies are the tasteless, wafer sandwich ones with the waxy, over-sweet filling. Gah. First runner up are the nasty marshmellow-on-a-cookie that is all covered with chocolate. With those ingredients, how can you miss? But the marshmellow stuff is UGLY. I used to pick the chocolate off, but who wants to work that hard?
I almost swallowed my teeth when my husband calmly agreed to buy TWO tickets to the Stones for $125 each (in 1997 or so) but I gritted my teeth and went with it. Unfortunately had a few too many margaritas prior to the start and for years have been faking my recollections of the concert.
[Reply]
Oh, and an Umphrey’s McGee concert at the Pageant in St. Louis…
[Reply]
Never paid more than $100. Usually get great orchestra floor seats to all the good shows in Toronto for around $90. Almost ate a pair of tickets to Mama Mia about 5 years ago because we found out Cher was in town for a concert that same night. I saw the Jonas Brothers (had to bring my teen daughter) at House of Blues in Cleveland several years ago for $15 apiece. I did just blow $1000 for “Kingdom Bound” this Summer, but that includes 6 tickets for the concert, admission to Darien Lake amusement park, plus a hotel room for three nights.
Worst cookies by far: Nutter Butters. Fig Newtons would be pretty good, except for those disgusting, hard little seeds.
[Reply]
Fig Newtons. I don’t know what kind of people get off on calling these gross things cookies, barf!
[Reply]
I paid 160 bucks for a pair of Debbie Gibson tickets back in the 80s. A girl was involved of course. Being in my early teens I was desperately looking for any possible shortcut when it came to getting access to the naughty bits of the opposite sex. Miss Gibson did indeed open doors in that regard as did Adam Ant a couple of years previously.
[Reply]
I paid $120 / ticket to see the Yankees play the Red Sox in the baseball shrine better known as Fenway Park. I did it “for my kids” so they’d have a memorable experience on our vacation. From the moment we first glimpsed the park from the interstate until we left an hour after the game, we were in another dimension. Now that’s what baseball is about!
The seats were incredible – first row behind the Sox bullpen! And both kids got balls thrown to them from players in the bullpen by the 6th inning. The Sox won, and the Yankees fans sitting near us were incredible fans throughout. Who’d a thunk it?
It was a tough decision to part with the money to buy the tickets in the first place, but looking back I’d have spent two or three times more for that experience. I learned that there are some things in life you just have to do – this was one of them for us.
[Reply]
Good Morning Surf Reporters……….
Remember when you were young?
You shone like the sun
[Reply]
I paid over $100 the last time I saw U2 in Glasgow- the very last time!
That was when Bono paused to tell the audience that ‘every time I clap my hands a child in Africa dies’ and someone from the audience replied ‘stop fucking clapping then!’ -truly excellent.
When I worked in the bar trade a lot of people called me ‘John’. I know ‘Ian’ is the gaelic equivalent, but it was still a bit weird.
I kind of like ‘Jerry Kay’ though.
It sounds less sinister.
[Reply]
so ian = john? i tend to just call people what they are named. with variations.
i’m t-storm (tony)
tanya is tans (tauns) or taun taun
lindsey is now lindsey toons
haley is halstead
krista is ksta
amanda is manswers
trish is trish the dish
dana is danger
and so on.
4 am. bleah. do i get up early? do i?
[Reply]
Knucklehead…
I know you’re close to your departure date. I left a late-night comment for you a couple of days ago wishing you well, but Jeff posted early the next day and I’m not sure you saw it. No big deal, and I don’t need a response, but it’s here…tenth comment from the bottom..
http://thewvsr.com/index.php/crinkle-intolerance-and-kiosk-bizarreness/
.
Happy travels…jtb
[Reply]
@JCIII- A Floyd fan?
Most I ever paid for a concert ticket? $350. Front row. Neil Young.
[Reply]
You can also hear Disco songs and Huey Lewis and The News on oldies radio shows now.
[Reply]
JCIII.
Waters is coming to the new arena in Sept to do “The Wall”. I’ll be there with the youngest secret..wonder what those tix will cost??
[Reply]
chill-Last US Grand Prix was in Indy 2007.
About the only thing I can see myself spending over a $100 going forward would be for a Bengal superbowl ticket or a Reds world series ticket, neither of which seem very plausible in the near term.
[Reply]
She who must be feared and obeyed received front row court side tickets for Raptors Vs Nuggets for us once. The price on the tix was $600 each. Being that close to the players was great. Being that close to the dance squad was even better.
The next game I saw cost me $20 and I was in the very LAST row …and felt like I was about half a mile away
[Reply]
jeff/jer,
i got the twit about the giant baby. is that the same baby from the shanghai expo on the big picture?
http://www.boston.com/bigpicture/2010/04/shanghais_expo_nearly_ready.html
bleah.
i couldn’t open your link.
[Reply]
WB,
I’m going to the reds/mets game on monday. interested?
[Reply]
t-storm-interested yes, able no. Already commited to golf Monday night.
You twitter?
[Reply]
wb,
i do twitter, i think at jaboersma
but i’ve found with the new droid i’m not so good at it.
you appear (sp?) to be in dayton area, I’m in town sat, sun, and mon. and free for a drink most of the time. just may be geographically limited based on consumption. or the thick piss.
[Reply]
t-storm-I’m actually about 50 miles north of Dayton. That’s a long way to drive with one eye closed. Weather’s supposed to be crappy all weekend.
You should find a DD and come up on the 15th if you like craft beer. That goes for all the surf reporters. Cincy and Cbus are both only a 90-minute drive.
http://www.bockandrock.com/
[Reply]
I would Pay $100 to see The Black Keys right about now.
If you like any kind of blues rock I highly reccomend them. “Attack and Release” was their last album and their new album “Brothers” is out 5/18. Both are Fan-fucking-tastic. Actually all of their albums are great. Get them all.
[Reply]
I have paid at least $100 to see AC/DC (floor seats) a few times and my friend got us tickets to a Wilco show recently (PGH, Carnegie Music Hall) from bastardly online resellers for about $105. I don’t go to many arena/concert hall shows so I can justify paying that once in a great while. Most of the times, I’m either playing on the bill with bands I want to see so I don’t pay a cover, otherwise most shows I go to cost less than $10.
[Reply]
I paid $140 for general admission to see The Avetts Brothers at Cleveland House of Blues. More than worth it. Also, just last weekend paid $460 for tickets to see that singer songwriter from Alabama mentioned above at Star Lake (I refuse to use new names) this summer. Third row. Despite the opinions of him to the contrary previously posted here, I am sure it will be worth it. Paid over $100 numerous times to watch the Mountaineers. Always worth it, even when they lose.
On a side note, does anyone need a car? I seem to recall someone saying they did a couple of weeks ago. Anyway, its a ’94 Eagle Summit. Manual steering, transmission, windows etc. No bells. No whistles. 195K miles. Still runs good. Ugly as shit. Free of charge for someone who actually needs it. You will have to pick it up in Huntington, WV fairly soon. If not, posting on craigslist or going to goodwill where it will certainly be turned into scrap metal, which will make me cry. I tried to give to a charity that gives them to single moms without cars, etc., but got rejected because it only books for about $1.50.
[Reply]
Hey Ian, sorry to burst your bubble, but:
http://www.snopes.com/music/artists/bono.asp
[Reply]
Retrollama- I have seen McCartney too, he does put on an amazing show! I didn’t pay for a ticket though, it was a gift from mom and dad. And I know what your talking about with those ‘gourmet’ jelly centered cookies…it’s not even jelly, it’s like a melted gummy worm.
T-Storm-I agree. I’m always dissapointed when I go to bite into what I think is a chocolate chip, and it’s a raisin. If they were chocolate covered raisins, I’d be totally in.
[Reply]
mountie9wv – I would totally take that car for my little brother, but you’d have to bring it here to Chicago. Heh.
[Reply]
Paid a hunnert or so for tickets to The Who with Robert Plant opening a while back – absolutely worth it…
[Reply]
Hilarious, hilarious update Jerry. I am still laughing.
Anything thing “maple-flavored” is a living nightmare. I will not allow anyone, even my children, near me if they have so much as looked at maple flavoring. If I get maple-flavored anything on my person, God forbid, I immediately must shower. I am not kidding. And yet, I love REAL maple syrup more than almost anything. Go figure.
[Reply]
Paid just over $100 from ticketmaster to see the Cream reunion concert at MSG back in ’05. Spent $75 to see game 6 of the ’86 World Series at Shea Stadium.
[Reply]
Ewey gooey, rich and chewy inside.
That’s right, take a bite.
Tender golden flakey on the outside.
Your darn tootin,
It’s a big fig Newton.
IT’S A BIG, FIG, NEWTONNNNNNN.
[Reply]
The best cookie I’ve had was in Amsterdam. Can’t remember a whole lot about it, but I did laugh a lot!
@ Swami-
My bubble remains intact mate!
This one is actually true- and the ‘f’ word was used!
Maybe the guy in the crowd was a Jim Carrey fan, but the laughter from the crowd was worth the plagiarism. It was on the 21st June 2005 during a ‘speech’ in the ‘Elevation’ tour where Bono was asking people to text donations to charity.
The gig itself was pretty poor.
I’d seen them in ’97 on the ‘POP’ tour, which remains the most impressive show I seen to date, but on this occassion the pleading migdet let his own ‘hobbies’ marr what should have been a rock concert!
[Reply]
I love you motherfuckers, that’s all I wanna say.
Well, that’s not all I wanna say. I’d also like to add that I’ve never paid for sex in my life…………….and that’s really pissed off a lot of hookers.
Canadian maple cream cookies? You lost me at hello.
A hundred dollars for a show? Can’t even come close.
One time I was on the Mexico border at a shitty bar, these girls would pick up coins from the top of you beer bottle with their hotdog hallways. So we decided to stack $2.50 on a long neck, but we heated our quarters with lighters firrst.
They looked like a slot machines, or my name isn’t “T. Jason McAppleass”.
[Reply]
I just got back from Chicago…my boyfriend and I just went and saw Phish 3D…A 3D movie of the Phish concert we attended in October in Indio, CA. Not only did we make it into the movie, which was awesome, but we also announced it in the theater. We also met the keyboardist of Umphrey’s McGee in a bar tonight…I am drunk, and I wanted to share with everyone on the surf report, because I love you all.
After reading the new posts…I want some fricking Maple cookies, or a huge whopping stack of pancakes.
I will regret this in the morning I’m sure.
Night!
[Reply]
brit you seem cool except for the part where you get double teamed by trey anastasio and jon fishman.
i just couldn’t stand a double teamin’ for three hours with only one song being played.
[Reply]
I have worked a couple of places where we had to do service calls at chinese restaurants and every time the service guys would come back and say they would never eat chinese food again….
$100 + tickets: Bristol night race numerous times, worth every penny.
Game 2 of the Stanley Cup Playoffs, watching Carolina win with a shut out! Never seen anything like it, Canes fans rock!
I have seen Jimmy many times starting with seeing him open for the e\Eagles in Tampa in 1978 and every show was worth the money but I am not paying $100+ to see him until he starts writing boat songs again…
bad cookies: anything with chocolate or coconut in them:(
snickerdoodles are the best!
[Reply]
“hotdog hallways” I had to read that twice for it to click. Nearly spit coffee on my screen, you rock TFM.
PAmike-Thanks for the heads up on the Black Keys.
[Reply]
I’m no fan of Oreo cookies. I know I’m probably alone on that. I paid over $100 for front row seats to a Ron White show.
I didn’t pay that much for the last concert I went to. I was very disappointed. I’m sure the show was great but I blacked out shortly after getting there. Those so-called “date rape” drugs are a total farce. I couldn’t even stand up, much less do any raping.
[Reply]
T-storm, Trey and Jon can double team me any day. But you are right, some of there songs are just wayyyy to fricking long, even as a Phish fan, even I get bored after a 17 minute song.
Peace out surfers. Need sleepy.
[Reply]
Tinamarie,
There’s almost nobody here on the weekends; for the most part, the Reporters don’t mind rippin’ off their companies for surf time, but are reluctant to spend their weekends or evenings checking in. (I think some of them are in constrained relationships, but I’m too polite to point that out).
So, since I know no songs about North Dakota, I’ll sing two verses and two choruses of “Rapid City, South Dakota” by Kinky Friedman and the Texas Jewboys. You’ll have to put your ear real close to the monitor because I don’t have a mic or anything, but I’ll sing as loudly as possible.
Have a fine, badass, badlands weekend.
all the best,
jtb
[Reply]
I had to check my Uniform Resource Identifier address to make sure I didn’t accidentally land in Penthouse Forum…all this talk about double teaming threw me off. I blame the storm for leading young girls astray, but everybody has to have a hobby I guess.
jtb
[Reply]
Jason beat me to the oreo cookies, but I’ll say my piece anyway.
I’ve never gotten the appeal of the oreo. It’s just a glob of sugar-lard blend sandwiched between two wafers of compressed choco-flavored dirt-like substance, which when chewed and combined with saliva, is converted into a gritty, tooth-covering black sludge.
I also hate Little Debbie Star Crunch.
[Reply]
One good thing about Oreos is that they make possible Stephen Wright’s two-liner: “I like the hygienist who works in my dentist’s office – I think she’s cute. So while I’m waiting, I’ll eat a whole box of Oreos.”
As for surf time, I don’t in principle object to ripping off The Man, but generally there is no time to spare for such things. I do my Reporting from home or the odd hotel room, during evenings and weekends (as seen here).
JTB, thanks for bringing up Kinky. Now I have to listen to “Asshole from El Paso”.
[Reply]
Yeah, I’m not sure why it took that direction, but I just played along.
[Reply]
My favorite things begin with the letter “V”.
Valium, vicodin, vodka, and vagina.
Today, I am batting .750
Need to go visit the wife before midnight to bat 1000.
See ya.
[Reply]
Well, better late than never… I paid over $120 a seat to see Brad Paisley two years ago… One of the greatest shows of my life. On the other hand, I was handed a bunch of free tickets to see Loggins and Messina and it was the hands down worst show I’ve ever seen. I guess you get what you pay for. As for cookies, I find Lorna doones and fig newtons equally repulsive, and actually knew a guy who was killed by a Lorna Doone lodged in his windpipe. My surf report time is equally balanced between home and work, but my iPhone blurs that distinction.
[Reply]
Agree with previous posts, raisins are the devil’s dangleberries and should be avoided in biscuits at all costs.
I would however, stamp on a litter of puppies for a Scottish shortbread bickie to dunk in my tea!
[Reply]
Jason, your date-rape-drug comment was funny as all hell, and had me laughing out loud. That’s professional stand-up comedian caliber writing, my friend.
[Reply]
And T. Farty’s hooker one-liner was pretty darn funny as well. Are you sure you guys aren’t stealing this stuff? If not, if it’s original, you two have a higher calling than real estate.
[Reply]
Good Evening Surf Reporters….
Hope everyone had a fan freaking tastic weekend.
[Reply]
Worst cookie ever hands down..Social Tea.
My grandmother would just throw them all willy nilly in the cookie jar with the good cookies ie Chips Ahoy..and it permeated the cookie jar wtth that horrific shortbread flavor. It’s an old lady cookie and has no business being classified as such. I’d say it’s more of a biscuit..
[Reply]
Erm, once I counted in gas, parking and tolls. I paid 150 to see Tommy Hass play live in Washington DC.
Seeing a handsome, sweaty German tennis player cursing while loosing was glorious. Perfect.
[Reply]
Dudley, I was at that Cream concert, too!
And my sister was ayt game 6 in ’86.
Do I know you?
[Reply]
Son of Sam & JCIII – Roger Waters in Pittsburgh will cost ya $245 – $1,215 – gulp!
[Reply]
I am uncertain as to whether the Ken doll is gay or not, but he sure does have a purty mouth
[Reply]
i paid $100 to see the donky show in tiajuana once.
it was tastfuly done.
[Reply]
Gulp is right!
Thanks Alice…I think
[Reply]
How much extra would I have to pay to see the same donkey show but this time NOT tastefully done?
Hey do they still call the first row the splash zone?
[Reply]