|The 16 Ugliest Men In The History Of Rock 'n' Roll|
no particular order
Even if it wasn't for the solar system of terrifying warts, or whatever those things are, he'd still make the list. As it stands, this Motorhead legend is one of the Patron Saints of Ugly. An automatic, as they say. Wonder if he ever worries about one of those flesh biscuits falling off into his soup?
You have to admire a man who looks like Carrot Top's less-fortunate brother, is named both Roland and Orzabal, and is still successful. Apparently he conquered his fears. Maybe they should've been called Tears for Reflective Surfaces?
Hey, I admire him as much as anyone, but he was ugly. The man had no chin, not even a hint of one. It was just neck, then mouth. And it went downhill from there.
A seemingly endless reservoir of hideous. Always looks like he's been dead since Wednesday, no matter what day it happens to be. His appearances (then and especially now) on the Motley Crue installment of Behind the Music made me want to call my parents and just chat.
Don't believe me? Watch this. Vinnie is the one who looks like a monkey in a Rick Springfield wig, under the influence of Space Shuttle G-Force.
Bald on top, pube curtains on the sides, a moustache that's almost certainly full of baloney sandwich crumbs, a penchant for hippie clothing, and a body like the Liberty Bell (the crack is where they installed the press-on liver). Nearly the complete package.
Hey Ric, why the long face? Wonder how many times he's heard that one? The man looks like a wax figure in a hot room. I bet even John Kerry mocks him.
Proof once again that a person can be both unsightly and cool as hell. A musical genius who got short-changed on his earthly container. A classic Euro-Ugly.
I know he's kind of old in this Shemp-Howard-on-a-bender pic, but even when he was a youngling Iggy could scare the varnish off a door. And I'm not talking about his ferociousness, either.
Just nostrils, tendons, and hair.
Apparently the victim of a catastrophic mouth-muscle collapse. Looks like he got drunk one night and tried to stretch his lips all the way around a steering wheel, and the shit never fully snapped back.
Obscure? Perhaps. But look at that picture and tell me he doesn't belong on this list. No seriously, take another look at it. As my grandfather would put it, I wish I had his nose full of dimes. And Fantastic Sam's should refund his $8.00 without delay.
Don't believe me? Watch this. Gene is the one who looks like Epstein from Welcome Back Kotter after decades of Little Debbie abuse, wearing a leather jumpsuit, and making faces like he'd enjoy nothing more than a good bowel movement.
Probably wouldn't have made the list if he'd just gone down to Revco and spent 99 cents on a pair of tweezers. One of the richest and most magnificent monobrow pelts in the history of recorded music. There's more wild black hair above his eye sockets than in an entire issue of Penthouse from 1978.
Sonic Youth (Entire Band)
It's quite an accomplishment when every member of a band is ugly, but these guys (and gal) pull it off. It's all Ricks and Bun Es in Sonic Youth, without even a suggestion of Toms or Robins. You've got to admire that.
Pasty, paunchy, perpetually drunk, and
with a mouth like somebody stepped on a weak spot and fell through a
porch. All hail the king!