This is going to be brief, my friends. I started writing another update, and it was kinda funny… so I decided to set it aside and give it some extra attention, as time permits. Kinda funny is rare, and needs to be protected.
Today is Wednesday, so I’ve got very little time here. I can’t just breeze into my job at 2:59, like I usually do. There’s a meeting, which cramps my style. Sucks. I’m the master of the 2:59 breeze-in. Oh well. As Custer said, we’ll just have to do the best we can.
On the internet people tend to use the same phrases over and over again. Especially on Facebook. They say things like “I see what you did there,” and “I just threw up in my mouth.” And a million other things. Hell, I’m guilty of it, too. I’m not criticizing, just observing.
One phrase I notice all the time is “I’ll never be able to unsee that!” And today… in this half-assed little endeavor, I’d like to know the things from your life you wish you could unsee.
Years ago, in Greensboro, NC, I was at a shitty dump of a bar, and walked into the men’s room. It was a disaster area in there, and some dude was trying to take a dump in a filthy out-in-the-open toilet. The seat had been ripped off the thing, probably in a wild Rolling Rock-fueled frenzy, and was lying across the room.
The guy was hovering and struggling, apparently drunk, with one hangin’. Time has a tendency to distort memories, but it seems like it was more than a foot long, still-attached, and swinging. As I innocently passed through the doorway, and my mind processed what was happening before me, I shouted, “NO!”
It was an involuntary reaction, some kind of primal survival thing. And as I was hollering, I was also turning to flee. It’s something I wish I could unsee. <full body shiver>
I also had a potbelly roommate once, who liked to walk around in nothing but his tighty-whities. I used to scream, “Good god, cover it up! I can see the outline of your dick!!” But he was apparently accustomed to this kind of thing, and I couldn’t break him of it. He also brushed his teeth and applied deodorant, all around the place. While sporting his tighties. It was horrifying, and I’m about to start dry-heaving just thinking about it.
And I’m going to turn it over to you guys now. What things from the past do you wish you could unsee? Please tell us about it in the comments section below.
And I’ll back here tomorrow.
Have a great day!