Your End of Week Topic Dump, vol. 318
You guys aren’t going to believe this one… But I’ve been invited by Chevrolet to ride in one of their green Camaros, during the big festival of debauchery that is the Scranton St. Patrick’s Day Parade. Yes, you read that correctly.
Apparently they’re going to have several local bloggers inside the cars, and asked if I’d like to be one of them. I instantly accepted, because it has “memorable experience” written all over it.
I’m not sure it’s such a great marketing strategy to pack several sports cars with ugly-ass, pasty-white bloggers. But hey, that’s not my department. If they want me there, I’m willing to serve.
I don’t have all the details yet, but I think I’m going to be expected to crank-out Twitter tweets during the parade. So, that’ll be interesting as well. I’m unclear if I’ll be updating some Chevy page, or my personal Twitter account. I’ll let you know, as more info becomes available.
Should be fun! The parade is on Saturday, 3/13. Pass the beer nuts.
In case you were wondering (and I know you were), here are the five most-visited pages at TheWVSR, during February:
Number One
Number Two
Number Three
Number Four
Number Five
That’s right, the homepage wasn’t the most popular destination last month. These things happen, from time to time. And it happened this time, because of Rusty Kuntz and friends. I couldn’t be prouder.
And this reader comment, left by TILLY on Tuesday, contains one of the funniest lines I’ve read in a while. See if you can figure out the line I’m talking about…
I was, in a past life, in charge of the kitchen at my church. We had “family Sunday” dinners once a month and we all brought a dish to share. I decided since I was in the kitchen anyway I would broil fish and serve that because someone had given me a ridiculous amount of cod. So I broiled it in the kitchen and proceeded to make the entire place smell like a vagina full of bad decisions. It was hilarious!! The entire congregation looking around trying to figure out what the hell was going on. NO fire though.
I almost did a spit-take, I’m not kidding. Thanks for that one, TILLY. Simply excellent.
I haven’t mentioned my “book” lately, mostly because there’s not much to report. Oh, Metten gets my stressed-out, whiny emails from time to time. And so does Brad. But I try to spare the rest of you. In a nutshell: the whole process is so infuriatingly slowed-down, it’s about to send me over the edge.
Anyway, I was in Borders recently, and saw a coffee table book about knots. It was an expensive, oversized thing, with a photograph of a length of rope tied in a different knot on every page. Knots!
And goddammit, if a publishing house paid someone for that crap, then I shouldn’t worry. Right? If the Book of Knots (or whatever) is on the market, it should serve as an inspiration to us all.
That’s the way I see it.
A few days ago I went to “lunch” (8 pm) at work, purchased a bottle of water from the vending machine, found a seat at one of the high school cafeteria tables, and flopped down.
And inside my lunch bag was a dirty Tupperware container, which had housed my salad on the previous day. Underneath it was another bowl, with congealed 24 hour-old soup residue clinging to the sides.
Fantastic. Toney packs my lunch, and I don’t even look at it until it’s time to rip into the thing. But sometimes she forgets; she has ten million things going on, as opposed to my million.
So, I had to tear ass out of there, and went to… Subway. I hadn’t been in that place since I told a sandwich engineer to go fuck himself. But that was months ago, and I decided enough time had passed for me to make my triumphant return. And I was correct; the engineer was someone completely different, with no real reason to slip a booger into my hoagie.
And man… that thing was good. I don’t know what it is, but sometimes those five dollar lettuce sangliches hit the spot. The bag full of dirty dishes worked to my benefit, it sure did.
But it reminded me of an incident in Atlanta, years ago. A woman thought she’d brought spaghetti or somesuch, leftovers from the previous night’s dinner, and popped the container into the work microwave. It was a margarine bowl, and she just cracked open the lid, and popped it in the nuclear heating box.
And yes, you guessed it, she’d grabbed the butter instead of the spaghetti on her way out the door. So, she sat down with a fork, in front of a steaming bowl of partially-melted margarine for lunch.
I can still hear the sustained laughter of her “friends.”
And I’m going to leave you now with a big Question. I’d like to know what are the most amazing things you’ve ever seen. How’s that, huh?
I’m thinking about locations, places in the world that blew your freaking mind. But, as usual, you can bend the rules and list whatever you want.
Two things jump immediately to my mind. I’ve never seen the Grand Canyon, or the Egyptian pyramids, or anything like that, so my two examples might not seem all that dramatic to some of you. But both affected me a great deal.
The first was a couple of years ago, when we flew to England. I’d wanted to get there since I was a kid, and was super-excited about the whole thing.
We took off from Newark around ten o’clock at night, and flew for about five hours. Then it was daylight again (freaky), the sky was incredibly clear, and we were flying over Ireland.
Finally getting to the UK, and seeing it for the first time from an airplane window, was one of the most memorable (amazing) things I’ve ever seen.
Also, when I was an unsightly teenager I went to Fenway Park to see the Red Sox play one of the expansion teams. Toronto, I think.
And when I walked up the tunnel and laid my eyes on the inside of that great old park, my heart skipped a beat. I was a complete baseball freak at the time, and a lover of baseball history.
It was an amazing moment, one which I’ll never forget.
Now it’s your turn. Tell us about the most amazing things you’ve ever seen. Use the comments link below.
And I’ll see you guys next time, whenever that happens to be.
Have a great weekend!
Filed under: Daily
Weee-Heeeee!!!!!!
The most amazing thing I have ever seen is a book about knots
Wow. The Grand Canyon, Arlington National, and my first time at Yankee Stadium (1868).
I’m gonna git you, sucka!!!
Venice is incredible the first time you see it
Joe T, are you a vampire or some such?
Teh view of Zion Canyon from Angels Landing at dawn comes in a close second to the book of knots
I actually own two different books of knots, purchased a couple of years ago when I was learning to sail (sailors need to know some very specific knots, after all). But I’d trade both of those knot-books for one novel based on the adventures of Eninen and Sunshine & Mumbles.
Wow. Yankee Stadium in 1868 must have been amazing too, but my sausage finger missed the 9. 1969.
A half naked, drugged out Navajo sitting right in the middle of the road as I drove through Canyon de Chelly in AZ. He was glaring at me and giving me the finger as I drove by….just for the fuck of it, I guess.
hiya
Most amazing……..Glacier Point @ Yosemite. A bit of a drive to get to, but OMG…..fabulous!
When you live alone, you always pack your own lunch. And it is never free.
Never eat at the Subway in downtown Morgantown. It is nasty. I have decided that Jimmy Johns is better anyhow.
Grand Canyon
Kileauea Volcano, Hawaii
Sistine Chapel, Vatican, Italy
Versailles, France
The view from the top of the World Trade Center, NYC
An SR-71 taking off. Slight lift off from the runway and then vertical! Amazing.
Two things came to mind when I read your question, both from some SCUBA dives I’ve made.
The first was on the wreck of the Regina near the southern end of Lake Huron. The Regina was carrying groceries northward during a record storm and collided with another freighter. None of her crew survived. She is down about 80′ in one piece, mostly capsized with a large hole in the port side hull, close to midships. Her smokestack lies about 20 feet from the pilot house and debris is scattered around the bottom.
Swimming around the wreck I came across a box full of cans sitting by themselves. The box is cut like you’d find them on the shelf at Costco, about 2″ high all the way around. All the cans are in place, but the lables are either gone or unreadable. Very eerie, and a sobering reminder of what happened.
This wreck was featured on an episode of Deep Sea Detectives.
The other is from diving off Grand Cayman. The island is more or less the top of a mountain that sticks up from the bottom. The shore of the island slopes down to about 50′ and then drops off.
You sort of anchor 30 yards or so from the edge, jump off the boat and swim to the drop off. The visibility there is in the hundreds of feet. Then you go over the side and it’s unbelievable. On one side is a wall of brilliantly colored, indescribably color, living reef full of corals, fish and other sea creatures. Turtles cruise by routinely.
Looking down you see the reef continue as everything fades to a deeper and deeper blue until everything sort of vanishes. Looking away from the reef is simialr, just a vast, empty blueness. You get the feeling that anything at all could be out there. It’s a little intimidating. At the same time the blue sort of calls you to keep descending, and it’s almost hard to resist. You want to see what’s down there. Getting back up over the drop off brings a bit of both sadness and relief.
Anyway, those are my two stories.
Have a great weekend, everybody.
Thanks Jeff for making me realize I’ve never really seen anything amazing. But I CAN tell you what the most amazing thing I’ve ever smelled was and that’s a vagina full of bad decisions. It reeked like a church full of cod.
First time flying into Las Vegas at night….
Seeing the Tampa skyline from a hang glider 3000 feet in the air…
Flying into Las Vegas at night.
The Gulf sunset at the boardwalk in Key West.
The first time I went to the newly built Heinz Field to see the Steelers.
We had just gotten back on the boat after snorkeling in the waters right off Cozumel, when we saw this GIANT dorsal fin in the water. The shark turned toward the sound of our boat, and sidled up alongside–it was a whale shark, it’s head as big as a queen mattress. Not a one of us jumped back in the water to share any time with it (too scared!), but it was amazing to see the massive creature up close enough to touch it (which I did not).
Top 20!
I once saw a “waterspout” in Florida, that was pretty epic. First time walking into the stadium for a Mountaineers football game was pretty damn awesome too.
Does Chevrolet know you where dissing the Blazer? =-)
Amazing sights…
Standing and staring down at the world below my feet on the glass floor in the CN Tower probably ranks among amazing sights.
Detroit ruins.
What I want to see;
The Grand Canyon, Mojave phone booth (even though its gone now) and Utah badlands national monument.
The most amazing things I’ve seen:
* Yosemite Valley
* Stonehenge
* Queen in concert (alas, without Freddy Mercury)
An Arkansas State Trooper handing me the bottle of amphetamines I’d dropped in the back seat of his car.
The top most amazing things I’ve seen:
1. Sunset on the beach in Hawaii.
2. A blue whale and her calf swimming along side of my aircraft carrier. They actually slowed the ship down so people could get pictures.
3. and the most amazing thing was a picture of Brynhildr.
After that, life is just to damn boring.
Surf cam – I can’t bear to comment.
As I have mentioned before I am from Northern Indiana and I don’t get out much.
The view from my dad’s house in the hills of Arkansas is amazing. he has 80 acres of limestone and trees. Love it there.
Flying into New York City at night was amazing. Unbelievalbe how big that city is. Crazy!!!
Uhm that and Jeff Kay saying in his blog that he nearly did a spit take reading one of my comments- that was a pretty amazing sight!!
The most amazing things I’ve ever seen?
Gotta be my 2 kids.
Yes, I went there.
The most beautiful sight I’ve ever seen. 2nd or 3rd week of the war in Iraq. I was providing comm. for a supply convoy. We got a late start and ended up going through some shit hole village at about 10 pm. We got lit up by God knows how many : “insurgents”, walked right into a trap. A fuel truck got hit along with a water tanker. We were stuck, I called out for help from some near by gun ships. 10 minutes later 2 Cobras come flying in spraying the entire area with hellfire missiles and 50 cal. rounds. It was horrific and beautiful all at the same time. Like something out of Greek mythology, Zeus hurling down lightning at the pitiful humans below. It was terrible but it saved our lives. To this day the most beautiful and terrifying thing I’ve ever seen…
Jeff,
as sappy and disgusting as it is, I guess the most beautiful thing I have ever seen was the birth of my own child. yeah a cop out, I know. anyway, let me know more about your parade deal, I work in downtown Scranton(at the university), perhaps I can hook you up with some memorable tweets, email me if you like.
ps. another pretty cool thing I saw was Niagra Falls, truly a spectacle, but makes you want to pee, bad.
I had an experience similar to Jeff’s walking up a tunnel in to Old Mountaineer Field. It was awesome to a young’un in WV. Like a religious experience. I suppose it was. In reality, it was a shithole of a stadium built in 1925, that wreaked of urine, old men, and cigars.
One of the neatest things I’ve seen is traveling to a city in Siberia, Russia, above the border with Mongolia. I go for a walk when the temp is below zero and wander into a little old grocery/deli shop, stand against the wall and watch the people going about their business, ordering their groceries, amazed at the sheer fact that I’m there.
-Hale-Bopp comet, from the vantage point of a 747
-Niagara Falls (it does compel one to pee and/or jump)
-Funnel Pants
- this amazing stripper in Montreal – her name was Chantel (I know, what a shocker)
- USS Enterprise from the Norfolk Naval Base dock
- the color of the ocean on the way to the Bahamas
- I once saw the view from the field of the Skydome in Toronto looking up at the massive crowd (saw the three tenors – Ciao Lucianno…)
- Once as the sun came up I saw a sun pillar (I think that’s what they’re called) in the shape of a cross- it shut me up for a few minutes (it was beautiful)
- the whole drive from San Francisco down to Big Sur is one postcard better than the last
- the Northern Lights
- the night sky during the big power failure in Aug 02 (?)… the boy and I camped out on the driveway and couldn’t believe the light show
.
-Each of my sons entering the world, 27 and 26 years ago (I thought of this immediately, before reading the comments)
-A troop (troup? troupe?) of capuchin monkeys, several with babies on their backs, making their way along a jungle river in the Osa Peninsula of Costa Rica, including leaps from tree to tree
-The Grand Canyon
-Trout jumping in Henry’s Fork of the Snake River, just outside West Yellowstone
-Alaskan glaciers, seen from a helicopter
-The view of Angel Stadium, walking up to go see Game 7 of the 2002 World Series. I’ve been there over 100 times, and that visual still gives me goosebumps.
Actually now that I think about it, Mountaineer Field this year when we played UConn after one of their players was murdered that week was pretty awe inspiring. The entire stadium applauding as UConn took the field and then when the announcer asked for a moment of silence, you could literally hear the flags over the stadium rustling. No coughs, no giggles, no children crying. 65,000 people in complete silence. Not a big deal to most but I thought it was pretty special.
The first time I walked to the top of the Acropolis and saw the Parthenon. Brought tears to my eyes. That and the Sistine Chapel. The Vatican has a rather obscene amount of riches that can make you slack jawed. The Crown Jewels were pretty cool, too. Did you guys catch those when you were in London, Jeff?
Happy Thursday, Surfers!
All of yours plus:
a 747 practicing touch and go landings.
The entire memorial area at Hiroshima, especially the view of the genbaku domu from the cenotaph.
Grand Canyon, Big Sur drive, of course.
View from Highway 101 northbound overlooking Crescent City, CA from the south.
I ski a lot out here in the west so I see a lot of mountain tops. One time at Mount Bachelor in Oregon it was so clear you could see the Cascade range from Mt Shasta in Ca up to Mt Adams in Wa and everything in between.
Then there was that show in Olongapo City PI. Talented gal…
The most amazing thing I ever saw was Arlington by far. Second would have to be when I was driing to the next town over one day. I crested a hill to see an apache helicopter facing straight at me about 100 feet above the road. It was amazing. I can’t imagine being on the recieving end of that thing.
Probably one of the most amazing things I ever saw was flying from San Antonio to Cincinnati on July 4th, in 1st class watching hundreds of towns simultaneously have their fireworks display. Pretty cool.
Beyond that, no idea I’ve seen a lot of cool and weird shit in my day.
Places? Grand Canyon, Yosemite, Mono Lake. Mount Haleakala at sunrise. Manhattan from a ocean liner. Kauai by helicopter. Glaciers on Greenland. C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate.
So who is going to get a picture of the smoking fish with Jeff driving by in the background?
Good Evening Surf Reporters….
Amazing things…
-A meteor that streaked across the Eastern sky back in early 1999. It was a gigantic fireball and lasted a good 7 – 8 seconds. I can only guess how big the fire tail trailing it was, but on the news the next morning, it was witnessed by people all over the east coast, from New Brunswick & Nova Scotia in Canada to people as far south as South Carolina and Georgia. So, pretty fucking big.
-the Blue Angels practicing before the Pittsburgh Air Show. My office was only a mile away from the airport and they buzzed(roared) over my building several times. So close you could see the pilot.
-that same year, same air show, an Air Force C-5 Galaxy cargo plane coming in for a landing. Monstrous. Flew right over my car as I was driving on the parkway. I thought the wheels were going to crush my car, it was that close. I could even see the riveting on the underbelly.
-camping out at Lake Pymatuning. No ground light for miles. I believe I saw every star in the Universe that night.
-when my oldest son graduated from Parris Island. Watching an entire company line up in formation. Perfection.
-Several golf courses with scenic / panoramic views. One of the best was the 16th at the Port Royal Golf Course in Bermuda. You actually hit your tee shot over the ocean. Here, look > http://www.pompanobeachclub.com/gfx/golf-hole16.jpg
I’m sure to think of more, but that’s all for now.
oops, the year for the meteor was 1990, not 1999. Does anyone else remember seeing it?
The most amazing thing I have ever seen was when the doctor held up my son for me to see after an emergency c-section…He was PERFECT!
A lot of people say that seeing their kids born was amazing. I wouldn’t describe it that way. I think I’d use the word “shocked” – and not in a good way. During the birth of the first one the nurse invited me to come over and look at the hair and eye color as the little girl’s head was just
coming out and she was born face-up. I swear to God, I nearly passed out and had to stumble over to the Dad chair. There was nothing beautiful about it at that point. What I saw looked like a fucking pot roast with a baby’s head sticking out of the middle of it. I didn’t think she’d EVER be the same “down there”. Sorry, just being honest. For the other two I just sat next to my wife at the head of her bed and waited for for them to clean the babies up and hand them over to us.
I’ll chime in with amazing things later.
As long as we’re talking about vaginas and bad decisions, Jason, I am right there with you. The most amazing, and by amazing I mean scarring, thing I have ever seen was a baby coming out of TILLY.
Most amazing thing ever was seeing some guy under an underpass with shit in his pants waiting for his wife.
And I’d like to think that I have added to a vagina full of bad decisions.
Mont Blanc from a chairlift in France. Driving to the top of Pikes Peak. Iceland. Saturn and its rings from Barbers Point. That comet – was it Hale-Bopp? – but I only saw it from a parking lot in Carlisle, PA.
One day I would like to see a launch of the Space Shuttle (or its successor).
Watching my son pop out after 18 hours of labor, then grab my finger when they gave him to me was pretty much it. Nothing else could ever touch that…But I always wonder if an alien sighting would, then I remember that I drank too much the night before…
@ Jason – My first daughter came out face down, between that and the white slop on her I thought she was deformed/dead…
whan I first read “vagina full of bad decisions” I nearly laughed myself sick, and read it about 20 times to make sure it burned in…oh, I’ll get some mileage out of that one…
Let’s see, in no particular order, amazing things that I’ve seen:
Chichen Itza in Mexico, hand carved stones fitted perfectly together with space less than a sheet of paper between them using NO MORTAR.
An-225–The world’s largest aircraft. Massive. Stood inside of the thing and just looked around.
Arlington National Cemetery: Saw a funeral for a soldier’s young child, literally every single person within seeing distance stopped all at once, including a parade of what looked to be VERY high ranking officers–breathtakingly sad, but an amazing thing to see every person stop at once and become silent.
The Ohio State-Michigan game 2006. Live and in person. 42-39 final, #1 vs #2, and a rivalry game like none other. One of the most amazing moments of my life. Seeing fans storm the field, seeing rioting for the first time, and my first taste of tear gas. What a night to remember.
Ive got the usual:
1. baby girl born
2. everytime baby girl smiles or laughs
3. Mountaineer Field (from the band to Country Roads being sang)
4. All of WV’s natural wonders (from Spruce Knob to rafting the
Gauley, stay amazed on each view regardless of the times I’ve
seen them…and yes, I’m a diehard WVian, what of it?)
5. Tulum
6. Sunset on Mallory Square (yeah, I like Buffett too)
7. The Avett Brothers (if you have any hippie in you, they are worth a
listen).
8. A group of perpetual smart asses talking about what views
touched them.
1. View from the John Hancock tower on a clear night in Chicago. You could see every streetlight and street for miles, then the blackness of Lake Michigan to the east. It didn’t look real (and I’m afraid of heights).
2. Rock concerts: First stadium concert, 1974, CSNY, at Cleveland Stadium. Walked up the ramp and looked out on a sea of approx. 90,000 people! I had never seen that many people in one place at one time.
Pink Floyd, Three Rivers Stadium, 1975 tour. Amazing special effects.
The Who, 1975 tour (I believe it was the first use of lasers in a rock show, during “See Me, Feel Me:). Keith Moon was still alive.
3. Aurora Borealis, in Ohio(!). Living in the country, went out on the south (back) deck of my house in the summer looking for a meteor shower. Saw odd flashing lights over the roof of my house to the north and thought it was a police car or fire engine with their lights on. Went out the front door and saw the most amazing green and blue lights moving and flashing in the sky. It lasted for 10 minutes or so and my mouth was hanging open the entire time.
I’m sure there are more but those came to mind first.
Way to go on getting to ride in the Camaro, Jeff!!!! That is totally cool. However…had someone kept a running blog comparing the number of “F” words on Deadwwood to the number of times YOU used the “F” word in relation to your time owning your Chevy Blazer…Deadwood woulda looked like a G rated kiddy show!
Amazing things: Almost exactly a year ago to the day, a meteorite doing a slow burn across the southern horizon when I went out to launch a weather balloon. Halfway across, it broke up into 5 or 6 pieces and did a spectacular fizzle.
…Seeing my 4 month old daughter alive after 5 hours of open heart surgery. The surgeon billed us for 5 hours at $1500 an hour. I looked at the bill and remarked, “Holy crap! He only gets $1500 an hour for THAT???” Truly the best bargain I’ve ever got. Of course, now she’s on the verge of becoming a teenager…so I may have to rethink that. lol!
…being at the South Pole, driving a track loader, totally wasted, listening to Peter Gabriel on my Sony Walkman, and watching the Southern Lights.
@Carol…was that Aurora display about 10 years ago? Because I was driving cross country from Seattle to Buffalo, and in the middle of the night, driving through Ohio on I-90 I saw the absolute best Aurora. And believe me, I’ve spent 20 years in Alaska, and that display in Ohio was the absolute best I have ever, ever seen in my life!
@Jason…I’m with you. I missed my first daughter being born, but got to witness the second one during a C-section. I saw the head starting to come out, then started to pass out. Two nurses grabbed me under the arms and led me out to a “recovery” room and gave me oxygen. I told them, “Don’t worry about me…please, go back in and help with the delivery.” To which one of the nurses replied, “No, we’re not here for the delivery, our job is to look out after the fathers. Believe me, this happens ALL the time!”
I can’t wait to see Jeff sharing a green Camaro with this piece of work who believes the town where Jeff keeps his beloved P.O. Box 4 is the “Center of the Universe” and a way station for Earth bound UFO’s and portals into other dimensions.
I can see the conversation as they wave to the mouth breathing crowd.
Local Lunatic: (With white schmeg dried on the corners of his chapped lips) “So uh, hey man, ya know, dese UFO’s show up onnacounna the Egyptian Pyramids and Harry Houdini.”
Jeff: “I’ve seen Mark Everett live!”
Local Lunatic: “The Egyptians worshipped the seven stars of the Orion constellation. ”
Jeff: “I want a smart phone. The droid. How about that Paul Westerberg? I’ve seen him live.”
Local Lunatic: “Poop!”
Jeff: “Hey, did you know in England they have hamburgers and french fries, but they call french fries ‘Chips!’”
Local Lunatic: “I haven’t updated my site since I was kicked out of the local library for sharting!”
I’ve thoughtfully included the link to the local lunatic’s blog.
http://www.watermelonpunch.com/nepa/blog/archives/000608.php
1. We got called to a structure fire years ago. I had a newbie with me as we were doing a search. We found the source of the fire in the roof and it was slowly cascading over the entire ceiling in amazing blue/green flames. It was truely beautiful to watch – until the roof started comin down.
2. A rescue involving a woman who had a 3 inch metal pipe straight trhrough her after crashing her car. It missed all major organs. We had to cut it and the side of the car out to get her into the ambulance!
A rare semi-transcendent question of the day. This might require several words.
Really don’t mind if you sit this one out. *
OK: The most amazing things I’ve ever seen. I’m reasonably well-traveled, but the universe opens its gates all the time, and presents biblical-type miracles every day. I usually miss them because I’m “busy” and looking down. But once in a while…
1) — deleted at commenter’s request –
2) Sunset at Copalis Beach, WA, followed by a faint green flash.
3) Mt. Rainier (Indian name, Mt. Tacoma) from Pinnacle Peak after a 4 hour hike/climb.
4) Finding myself in the midst of 20 deer walking in the morning snow down to Lake Chelan for water in February, 1988. For a moment I was part of them and then I wasn’t.
5) Dawn at Canoe Creek on Lake Chelan in February, 1990, 12 miles from the nearest human and the nearest road, but it might as well have been 1200. No radio, no cell service, no electricity. Six inches of mist on the flat water. Silence and serentiy.
6) Flying over and dipping into an empty Texas Stadium in Ross Perot’s helecopter (he wasn’t aboard) in May, 1996.
7) Driving The Apache Trail through the Superstition Mountains east of Phoenix, stopping for lunch at Tortilla Flat, and proceedinig through unparalled desert vistas and distant lakes that looked like puddles, on a narrow gravel road with a thousand foot drop on my left and a friend on my right.
9) Five raccoon pups, each about seven inches long (not counting tail) munching cat food and tripping over one another on my back porch, guarded by their mother who was standing watch on her back legs like a grizzly while the pups moshed around her.
10) Being surrounded by the 58 best chess players in the United States at the 2001 US Chess Championship in Seattle; posing as an “official” photographer and ducking under the ropes to stand close to Boris Gulko, Yasser Seirawan, Joel Benjamin, and all the other GM’s and IM’s. Taking as many pics with my clickless digicam as I could without getting thrown out. The silence and level of concentraion in that room at the Seattle Center was astounding. (One of my pics of US Women’s champ Jennifer Shahade was subsequently published with credit in Smithsonian Magazine, so I also made some money that day).
I was as astounded and impressed at Arlington National Cemetery as the other commenters, and didn’t expect to be. I could make the list 20 or 50 items long, but I’ll save that for the blog I’ll be doing one day with the Dude.
jtb
* @1972, Jethro Tull, Chrysalis Records, all rights reserved
ClintCurtis – The only time I have been in a delivery room was with TILLY as mentioned above.
When she had her first, she asked if I wanted to be in the room. The caveat was that if at any point she felt uncomfortable and asked me to leave I had to leave with no protest. Fair enough.
While she was in labor and about 6 hours away from the baby’s ETA a nurse came in to see how she was progressing. I stepped out of the room to be polite.
Apparently things were moving more quickly than anticipated. When I walked back in TILLY’s feet were up in the stirrups, and the baby’s head was crowning.
TILLY asked me to leave, and I obliged. She told me later, and has told me many times since, that she asked me to leave not because she was uncomfortable, but because I went white as a sheet, and she thought I was going to pass out. She was right.
I have never had children, and the reason I do not have children can e traced directly back to this incident.
Kauai from helicopter. Grand Canyon from helicopter.
Hoover Dam from same helicopter.
Sunrise in Provo Utah the 1st time I’d ever seen the Wasatch Range. Vail Colorado at night with the Mts glowing all around.
Sorry to have traumetized you WTB!! I too have spent the last 19 years traumetized by the events of that day. LOL
@ Hot Fuzz- I take offense at the comment about the strippers name. Yes. yes i do.
I have also had that Fenway moment as a kid. Coming up the drab tunnel, the sudden rush of light and colors, from the greenest grass I had ever seen to the crisp red and white of the players uniforms. Only seen previously on television, what a rush.
Other memorable sites:
- swimming with a sea turtle while snorkling in Hawaii
- flying my powered paraglider, the view from above is always awesome
- palm trees (means I’m some where tropical)
- every nekkid woman I’ve ever had the opportunity to explore
- the Grand Canyon and Rockie Mountains of Colorado
- flying over NYC on a crisp, clear winter night
- my daughter on her wedding day
- standing in an empty Fenway Park holding the WS trophy from the 2004 championship
The sights of NYC from the tops of the World Trade Center, the Statue of Liberty and the Empire State building.
Watching the cliff divers in Acapulco.
The views from riding the Cass train. (absolutely stunning).
Seeing a 2lb, 5oz. baby struggle and thrive and seeing him reach all the regular milestones (a bit late, but it still brought tears to my eyes – I never knew if he’d do any of those “milestones”).
My 7lb, 5 oz daughter being wiggled over the screen and the OB saying “Hi, Mommy!” after my 2nd c-section.
The view from my front porch.
Tilly – I apologize for offending you. I’m sorry I’ve hit a sensitive subject.
My words but a whisper; your deafness a shout…
I once saw a moonbow (from Wikipeida: A moonbow – also known as a lunar rainbow, lunar bow or white rainbow – is a rainbow produced by light reflected off the surface of the moon rather than from direct sunlight) while camping one stormy night on the edge of Linville Gorge (NC). I didn’t know that this sort of thing could exist until I saw one for myself. It blew me away, maaan.
Other candidates:
- Ruby Beach, WA
- Spider Meadow, WA
- Enchantment Lakes, WA
- Headlight Basin, WA
- Mt Rainier Natl Park
- Goat Rocks Wilderness, WA
- North Cascades Natl Park
- Mt Timpanogos, UT
- High Uintas, UT
- Canyonlands Natl Park (i.e., Needles District)
- Bryce Canyon Natl Park
- Arches Natl park
- Glacier Natl park
- Shining Rock Wilderness, NC
- Ozark Natl Scenic Riverways
- Joyce Kilmer Memorial Forest, NC
Crazy Vagina Head.
When my son was born, there was a Dixie cup sized / shape protrusion on his head from being squeezed out. I knew it wasn’t permanent, but I was mesmerized. Watching his head change shape before my eyes was the most incredible thing I’ve ever seen
Jeff,
Just one question, is this parade like the Commode Bowl, where they let anybody ride?
Man, I just got through the England reports, Great Stuff!!! First set of Real boobies I seen up close and personal was the greatest thing I ever saw, as were the second set, and pretty much every other set, well except that time I walked in on Grandma getting out of the shower but no sense in dredging up that painful memory but you get the point.
Saw two people fall out of a plane from about 15,000 ft when I was 10. They wern’t wearing parachutes and did not intend to fall out…their plane was ripped apart in a big thunder cloud. Bummer. The man came down through the trees and looked like a pile of spilled Italian food…chunks of him hanging from the trees and such. The woman landed in the pine trees and hit the soft forest floor covered in pine needles. It probably didn’t feel too soft for her when she hit it going 150 mph. She was naked and had apparently been that way when she exited the plane. Her membership in the “mile high club” was short lived.
A pretty cool sight was the hole left in my Army helmet liner…the one the bullet made as it missed my head by probably 1/4 inch. good old Central America in 1982.
Woodstock, Aurora Borealis while laying on my back in a field in Maine, The Grand Canyon and the nude beach I went to in St. Maartin.
I remember seeing a bat at sunset on the Isle of Skye when I was on magic mushrooms. WOW!!
The Sagrada Famillia in Barcelona is fairly awe inspiring too.
For wonders of the natural world, the Canadian Rockies made me stop talking for a few minutes!
The Intra-German border was pretty cool. I don’t know if it qualified as “amazing,” but it was impressive and gave you an odd feeling in the pit of your stomach.
As for wildlife, I’ve seen a couple of albino deer, otters sliding down a hill into a lake, come eye-to-snout with a wild boar, eye-to-fang with a black widow spider, seen soaring and still bald eagles, and osprey catch a fish about the same size as itself.
As jaded as I am in other realms, I’m glad the natural world can still amaze me.
i live in doddridge co wv
dont get out much
most amazing thing i have ever witnessed was last spring while fixing fence on my farm
i look across holler on dewhite’s farm there was his high priced specially trained great pyrenees goat gaurding dog having his way with a female goat
i rolled about 10 feet down hill laughing my butt off
that not something you see every day
Well, Hello, it has been a while, surfers. Work and family life have taken their toll in the last two months, but here I am.
Memorable sites in my lifetime (there are a LOT so this is a distillation):
Grand Canyon but not from the rim – at about the halfway point from Angel Lodge to Phantom Ranch on the Kaibab Trail, I had a religious experience with the whole place – it just kind of sucks you in. Every turn on the trail brought me to tears.
Iguassu Falls in Brazil. No more need be said. Just go and see it.
The Pyramids at Giza. Yes, they really are that impressive. Rent a camel and tour in style.
Pokhara, Nepal. Even a glimpse of the Himalayas is enough to convince you of our Earth’s beauty and majesty.
The southern sky from a roll-out sleeping bag in Kakadu National Park in Australia. You could reach out and touch the Milky Way, crocs be damned…
The Coigach peninsula in northwest Scotland. Some of the most beautiful scenery combining mountains and seashore anywhere in the world. The Isle Skye has nothing on the village of Achiltibuie – this is truly the undiscovered country.
San Miniato, Italy – a Cappucino monastery out in the country, full of the most serene landscapes that combine nature’s wonders and man’s attempts to conquer them.
Hong Kong at night – the city simply breathes in front of you.
The At Institute of Chicago. In grad school I would take advantage of FREE Thursday afternoons and go decompress for a while in this brilliant museum. I spent 20 minutes one day alone, face to face, with a van Gogh self-portrait that I still see clearly in my mind today. This is a small, but very worthy collection, especially of impressionism. The Ferris Beuller scene where they hold hands with the schoolkids while Dream Academy plays in the background was filmed here.
FYI, tomorrow I am going to play FB’s Day Off for a bunch of 12-14 year olds who have never seen it. My idea of a public service.
Over and out, for now…
Good Morning Surf Reporters….
dogberryjr jogged my memory on bald eagles. Have seen them twice in real life, real world settings.
First time was in Florida about 5 years ago. On a golf course, waiting for others to hit. Checking out the scenery, looked up and there were 2 about 100 feet over my head. Wings spread, catching the wind, just cruising by.
Second, and more recently, right outside my work place. For a few years there was rumor that a nesting pair of eagles were living by the Ohio River in my little neck of the woods. I was in the showroom, looking towards the river valley, when a big bird, flying fast, caught my eye. At first I thought it was a hawk, but immediately dismissed that idea as the bird was way to big.
The last glimpse revealed a white head, unmistakable against the brown body. By the time that registered, Baldy was out of sight, still moving fast up river towards Pittsburgh.
I tried to tell co-workers about the cool sight I had just witnessed… nobody cared.
@clintcurtis-
Yes, it was about 10 years ago! That’s amazing we saw the same thing and that it was the best aurora you’ve seen after spending all that time in Alaska! I check out the aurora photos all the time at spaceweather.com (many of the great ones are from Norway and Iceland). Wish I could have photographed that Ohio display!
i’ve altered your “suit made of turds” into a “doo doo dress” yeah i’m hep! and i get funny looks.
all is complete.
When I was in the Air Force my unit hosted an Army chopper squadron (Charlie Company) in the same building, so we did lots of favors for those guys and they were always very aprreciative. Twice a week they took one of the choppers up to follow a fence line that bordered the government-owned land between our base in New Mexico and El Paso, TX, aerially checking the fence line for signs of encraochment (farmers would cut the fence lines and let their herds across to graze, etc.) – it was an all-day thing. Anyway, once their CO asked my boss if any of us would like to go up with them during one of the runs, sort of as a way to pay us back for our work, and of course I volunteered immediately. As we were making our way through the desert, just north of White Sands Missle Range, we spotted a dustcloud on the ground in the distance. Over my helmet mike I hear the pilot say to his co-pilot “hey, let’s buzz ‘em” – turns out that it was a one of several herds of spike-horned antelope that the US government kept in the area, because the desert so closely resembled their natural habitat. Apparently the choppers would spot at least one herd every time they went up, and they often “buzzed” them for fun – fly along lowly over top of them as they ran, the chopper would spook them and they would run even faster. As we approached, the co-pilot opened the bay door beside me, and I was able to swivel my seat and lock it facing the open bay door. They we flew right over top of the herd, moved down really close, and then tilted sideways a little, so that I was looking directly down at the herd of antelope, gliding along with them as though I was running with them, only it seemed like I was about 50 feet above them. It was just about the most beautiful thing I’ve ever witnessed. It’s really weird, but I almost didn’t know how to respond to the experience; and for some reason I started crying – something kind of hit me way down inside where it really counts, and it’s an experience I’ll remember until the day I die.
dont know if it was the best thing ive ever seen, but you know the Shawshank Redemption’s last scene on that sweet beach? Well its actually in St.Croix, took a small sail boat past there, it was quite nice.
Forgot one. First trip to New York City last January. We stayed at the Doubletree in Times Square and being the genius I am I decided we should just drive to the hotel instead of taking a train. Driving in midtown during rush hour is the visual definition of insanity. Never again. Took the wife to a Broadway play on Saturday and as we were exiting the theater, the sun was just starting to set and it was snowing hard. No strong wind just snow. It was almost surreal to me walking back to the hotel. I am and always will be a small town guy and thought I would absolutely hate NYC, in my mind I was just telling myself to take one for the team to make my wife happy. Shockingly I absolutely loved it. Still wouldn’t want to live there but I would visit a hundred more times. The history and culture is just overwhelming.
Good Morning Surf Reporters ..
Next thing you know Jeff will be working for Jalopnik.
=8^-)
Is it Monday again already?
jeff becoming semi famous is a disturbing thought.how long before he is one of those geeks that judges dog beauty contests and chile cookoffs?
I had an emergency c-section? With which child of the 4 did this happen? I know I’m blond but really…I think I would have remembered that.
Wait a minute….is there another Tammie that spells her name the same way I do?
WOW….maybe there are two of us?
Yep….there is another Tammie.
That’s the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen….two of us.
I love the smell of napalm in the morning.
The hell is my update?
No update? For those of you jonesin’ for another Further Evidence, here you go…Ruskie Style
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZQgjPiE1VfA&feature=related
(I looked for a bookmark or two to point to good parts, but…where to start?)
From Jeff’s Facebook…
I’m having technical difficulties here, and have made the executive decision to turn it all over to my webhost and go eat sausage and eggs at Waffle House. Executive decisions rock!
My God you guys are a well travelled bunch! I guess the most awesome things I have ever seen are the birth of my two children, the Smoky mountains, the Grand Tetons, a giant herd of antelopes in Wyoming at 6:00 am in the morning. A 1970 black on black hemi cuda, a whole road full of Dodge Challengers in Detroit at the Dream Cruise, the blue ocean from a cruise ship with dolphins swimming nearbye! the giant Walleye I caught on Lake Erie, Lake Michigan and Lake Superior, Mackinaw Bridge, the Gauley Bridge in W. VA, My mother’s face, My husband when he awoke from a month long induced coma, Hocking Hills in Ohio, riding the roller coasters at Cedar Point, Oregon Inlet in N. Carolina, Sleeping Bear dunes, Stonehenge, England from the air overhead looked like a beautiful patchwork quilt!
Seeing both of my grandchildren born, and being the first to take their pictures and say hello.
10 hours on a plane flying from England to Las Vegas, the view of the strip at night was worth the journey in itself.
The sight of my very own Fatburger,after a few beers, same hoiday as above.
Blagging my way onto a corporate exchange trip to Sandhurst Royal Military Academy, and being told that the cannon I was leaning against whilst having a smoke was one that Wellington took from Napoleon at Waterloo.
I missed Jeff today.
Yeah me too Citizen X, but you’ve got to admit how excited you were to learn that there are TWO TAMMIES! LOL
Rats, I was hoping for a Highlander-esque “there can be only one” showdown, Tammies.
Laying flat on my back, along with my fellow squadron mates, in the outfield of the Clark Air Base, Philippines baseball field. (Yes, we were sober – we’d just come off duty.) We were watching 3 interceptors which had been scrambled to investigate 3 red lights, arranged in a triangle, moving in ways which kinda defied the laws of physics.
We asked about it the next morning and were told we didn’t have the “need to know”. That’s USAF for MYOB.
I know what I saw, but I still don’t believe in UFO’s. So draw your own conclusions.
No quote tonight, it’s 0215 for pete’s sake.
WTF? where’s my update? i got so tired last night waiting for it, i fell asleep and it’s now morning.
Gee Gretchen, now you have me thinking…..perhaps the Tammies could wrestle it out in mashed potatoes? Or Jello?
Suggestions anyone?
@ Uncle Buzz —If you would have served where I did……….you would believe.
Care to expand Jerry?
The Tammies: Moe’s guacamole.
Jerry: Yes, please do expand…..provided you’re not currently wearing a tinfoil hat and have Art Bell on speed dial.
4 years at the NORAD Cheyenne Mountain Complex. 2 years as a civilian in AF Intelligence. Top Secret clearance in Space Based Weaponry. I think that says it all…………
Come on, Jerry, don’t leave us hanging. No one knows who you are, so you can give us more details. Are the big-eyed, grey-skinned creatures real? Are they visiting us and abducting some of us and conducting anal probes and mutilating cattle? We’ll keep it just between us Surf Reporters. Do tell, please.
Jerry in WV has information that proves that Glenn Beck is an alien, and he also knows that he will have to be killed if he divulges this information.
Glenn Beck can vaporize you in an instant with light beams that emanate from his eyeballs.
Do not ever under any circumstances taunt Glenn Beck.
Apologies to the speaker free reporters.
http://www.televisiontunes.com/X-Files.html
The inside of my new house when I opened the door for the first time with my very own key (Hey I’m 33 and just NOW hit that milestone after years of graduate school and 3 years of living in apartment hell.)
The closet in said apartment clean of my ex-husband’s crap.
Seeing my current husband for the very first time waiting for me near a lake in Wakefield, Massachusetts. (We met online and it was the first time we ever actually met in person.)
Seeing my son and his tiny heartbeat on the ultrasound at 9 weeks after at 8 weeks they told me he was dead (now 23 weeks and that kid is going to be a linebacker – measures in at 26 weeks!!)
The long walk to the podium to receive my PhD diploma.
And finally, the “places”-
The Sierra del Carmen mountain range at Big Bend National Park. It looked like a dream.
The pure white sand dunes against the impossibly blue sky at White Sands.
I want to see the Tammies wrestle in a kid pool full of melted velveta. Oh God, I just spurted.
Thanks, WB. I was already whistling that with Uncle Buzz’s post.
Glenn Beck can kill you with nothing more than an alvacado pit. Hint: If you’re ever alone with him don’t fall for the, “lemme see your tonsils” bit. Once your mouth is open he jambs the alvacado pit in your windpipe.
WB inOH, thanks for the link. That site is a treasure trove of forgotten mental flotsam!