The West Virginia Surf Report!

In Celebration Of Towns With Strange Or Ridiculous Names!

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I stumbled across a questionable webpage a couple of days ago that lists “unusual” town names in West Virginia. Here it is. I’ve never heard of any o’ those places, but wouldn’t mind calling Pie, WV home. Ya know? There were some towns around us, while I was growing up, that had crazy names. Places like Hurricane, Tornado, Mink Shoals, Pax, Paw Paw, Poca, Pinch, Quick, etc. I think most of those would fall under the heading of Strange or Ridiculous.

Here in Pennsylvania there’s a town called Jim Thorpe, a place that Jim Thorpe — the famous athlete — never visited while he was alive. I could look it up, but I’m very tired. I believe they just made a deal with somebody to move his remains there and rename the town Jim Thorpe. Weird. What’s next, Vic Tayback, Missouri? Bert Convy, Alaska? And, of course, Pennsylvania is home to the automatic go-to response in discussions such as this one: Intercourse. Which is located right next to Blue Ball. And down the road from Bird-In-Hand.

In Georgia there’s a town called Cumming, which triggered a lot of local “comedy.” I believe it was near Climax. And there’s a place down there named Santa Claus. Who the hell knows? In California we lived in Canyon Country, which is a bit odd, I think. And nearby was a town that I always thought had the ugliest-sounding name: Saugus. Man, that bugs me, for some reason.

What do you have on this one? I know it’s abbreviated, but I’m hanging by a thread over here. What towns have you encountered that you thought had strange or ridiculous names? Please share them in the comments.

And before I call it a day here, I’d like to invite you to call the podcast hotline and leave a message of congratulations (or whatever) on our 100th episode, which I’ll be recording in the next few days. It’s a voicemail setup, and it’s at 570-290-8151. Please identify yourself, and say whatever you’d like. Within reason, of course. Let’s keep it cordial, please. I’d like for you all to be a part of it!

I’ll see you guys again soon.

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Comments

  2. Jewtown, Georgia, on St. Simons island. Named for the founder, who was, uh, Jewish.

    Now if we’re talking international, you can’t beat Fucking, Austria. For some reason, tourists keep taking the signs.

  4. Imagine being a redneck in Hicksville (Long Island) New York?

    Or a real bum in Lake Success?

    Surf Reporters should NOT wear their Smoking Fish apparel in Fishkill, NY (that’s pretty close to me).

    Nobody really feels comfortable in Cocksakie, NY.

  7. I would have thought Nitro VW would make the list (close to Dunbar, yes?).

    Peripherally, I chuckled when you mentioned Bert Convy. I have a buddy who would sometimes invoke what he called the “not Bert Convy rule.”

    Whenever he thought his life was going down the shitter, he would say things like, “I can wake up tomorrow and say to myself: at least I’m not Bert Convy” to start getting back on the horse.

    • I have a cousin who lives in Belchertown. I don’t know if Bob’s Burgers has a location there.

  12. Just a few from Texas…
    Loco
    Kermit
    Cut and Shoot
    Jot ‘Em Down
    Ding Dong
    Notrees (pronounced ‘no trees’)
    Gun Barrel City
    Cool
    Dime Box

  14. I would totally live in a town called Vic Tayback, but I refuse to move to Missouri. Slowly I turned, and so forth.

  17. Depending on which way you are going, you have to pass through Tightsqueeze to get to Climax in Virginia.

  18. I live fairly close to a place with the most boring and generic name of all time: Townville. I keep meaning to go visit and see if the people there are just cardboard cutouts.

        • Yeah, watched every episode with my kids. Seems like a long time ago. I was always happy when they put Mojojojo behind bars! Yes, my life is outside the box.

  20. Additional ones from Canada:

    Red Head Cove, Newfoundland
    Balls Falls, Ontario
    Vulcan, Alberta
    Crotch Lake, Ontario
    Climax, Saskatchewan
    Saint-Louis-Du-Ha! Ha!,Quebec

  22. Yes the town of Mauch Chunk made a deal with Jim Thorpe’s widow.
    It’s a cute town with a darling railroad if you ever get down that way
    How could you forget Intercourse and Blue Ball, PA

  24. not exactly a town, but if you keep going north of the Pittsburg airport there’s a quaint little sign letting you know that the next exit is the Penn State Beaver Campus. Man, I shoulda studied there.

    Mabie, WV (pronounced maybe)
    Urban legend says there used to be a road sign saying Cassidy 7 miles Mabie 5 miles. I never saw it, but I like to believe it.

  25. not a town, but I once stayed at the Young Women’s Christian Association in Hong Kong. It was at 5 Man Fuk Road. No truth in advertising, sadly.

  26. White Settlement, Ding Dong, Cut and Shoot: these are a few of the weirdly named towns that I’ve been to in Texas.

  28. I live in Telephone Texas, a little town northeast of Dallas. Supposedly when originally applying for the town name their first choice was taken so they got choice number 2. It came from having the only telephone for miles around so people would say they were going to telephone when they had to make a call.

  30. We’ve got a Hell here in Michigan, and a Climax. Also Bad Axe, Bliss, Cement City, etc. I lived in Ypsilanti for a few decades, which was always fun to hear people try to pronounce.