few months ago I decided I needed to take steps to make this website
a bit more cool and with-it. I sensed I was losing touch with the
kids, and TheWVSR was in urgent need of hipness replacement surgery.
So I took immediate steps to immerse myself in all things Alternative. I went downtown to a disgusting theater in a horrifying neighborhood, and watched several independent films. I visited a trendy little bookstore, where the shopkeep was nothing if not uppity, and picked out some books with "Fuck" in the titles. And I also read a bunch of comix, or funnyz, or something misspelled.
Then it hit me -- I figured out the key to being Artsy and Underground. It's very simple really. All you have to do is start to tell a story, but not bother to actually finish it. If it ends with many important questions unanswered, and the plot unresolved, well mister, you've just created Alternative Art. And you're one step closer to being discussed knowingly between slurps off comically-oversized coffee mugs, by ugly people.
To illustrate my point, I've "adjusted" a few comics from my morning newspaper, and transformed them into comix, or funnyz, or whatever. What was once mainstream is now Art House! Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you my triumphant return to coolness and relevance:
The West Virginia Surf Report!