On Saturday night I was getting ready to go to bed, around 12:30 am, and heard someone hollering outside like an escapee from the wacky shack.
“Where the hell have you been?! Get in this house!!” the person roared, at the top of his lungs and very near our back door. I walked into the family room and stood beside an open window, so I could eavesdrop while the tirade continued:
“I asked you where you’ve been!! …What do you mean up the hill? What are you even talking about, up the hill?! …Who were you with?! …Are they still there? I feel like cracking some heads!!”
What the hell, man? Cracking some heads?? Who is this nut?
Then I heard him say, “You’re fifteen years old, drunk off your ass, and trying to climb in a window in the middle of the night?! What’s wrong with you?? WHY ARE YOU THE WAY YOU ARE?!”
Yep, it was Poppa Half-Shirt again, completely losing his shit. The guy was screaming so loud and getting himself worked-up into such a frenzy, his voice was cutting in and out and going all reedy. He sounded like a complete maniac.
And Sunday morning we heard him yelling again, apparently a continuation of the previous night’s “conversation.” Among the pearls of fatherly wisdom imparted: “SOMETIMES I WISH YOU’D NEVER BEEN BORN!” And this was followed by a godawful crash that sounded like a china cabinet going over.
Yeah, they have a good time over there…
Can you hear your neighbors where you live? Have you ever overheard anything interesting? If so, we need to know about it. Tell us about it in the comments section below.
Also, were you ever the yellee in that situation? The fifteen year old drunken hooligan trying to sneak into your parents’ house late at night? Did you get away with it, or did someone go all Half-Shirt on ya?
And I’m going to try something new for a week: updating a couple of times per day. They’ll be shorter posts, but more focused. And if it doesn’t work, we’ll just go back to the old way.
See ya in a few hours…