I know, I know. I’m breaking my own rule here, but I need to tell you about a dream I had on Saturday night. And I seek your analysis as well. May I offer a hearty WTF?? up-front?
I was walking around an unknown neighborhood, you see. It was upscale, and I didn’t recognize it. There was some sort of gigantic yard sale extravaganza going on. Every house had crap on their lawns, and there were even food stands set up, like at a carnival.
As I walked past a particular home, I saw a woman waving. She was sitting in a lawn chair, with nobody else around, and seemed to be zeroed-in on me. Come over, she implored.
I did as ordered, and she seemed friendly enough. But she wanted me to go inside, so she could show me something. I hesitated, then agreed.
The house was some kind of crazy-ass mansion, with doors that opened automatically, like at a grocery store. We went into the magnificent kitchen, and she suddenly had a large open-top box in her hands. Inside were six ceramic plates that hadn’t yet been painted. They were just white and raw, situated in two rows of three in the bottom of the box. Each was roughly 12 inches across.
She explained that I could buy all six for $75. And they aren’t just ordinary ceramics pieces. Oh now. There is a huge social network surrounding these things, she said. After you paint them, and glaze them (or whatever), you’re supposed to snap photos and post them to a special internet forum. Then you wait for feedback from fellow travelers.
The most interesting entries will be visited in-person, by three judges. They’ll look over your work, and you could be entered into some sort of international six-plate contest, and possibly end up with riches and fame.
“I’ll give you a little tip,” the woman said. “The key to the whole thing is the Loretta Lynn.”
What? I looked closer at them, and saw that each featured the face of a celebrity. Bob Dylan was represented, and so was Jackie Gleason. I can’t remember the other three.
And these things were super-intricate. It looked like it might take months to paint each plate. I had no interest in any of it. I mean, what the hell? Ceramics?? How did I get myself mixed up in this bizarreness? I wanted to get out of there.
But the woman was very high-pressure, and I started to feel like there might be trouble if I didn’t fork over the $75. I even had concerns about being held against my will.
Then another woman entered the room, carrying one of the plates. It was the Gleason. She wanted to show off her work, and my weird host began flipping-out over it: “Oh, that’s beautiful!!” I was introduced to the woman — she was called a “disciple” — and they began a lengthy conversation.
And as they talked, I turned and exited through one of the sliding doors, fully expecting to be called back. Or yanked back, or something. But nobody said another word to me, and I just continued walking.
What in the everlasting hell?? What does it mean? Can anyone decipher this insanity? It was so detailed. I remember, exactly, what the kitchen looked like. This is unusual for me… it’s generally a hazy blur. Also, why do you think the Loretta Lynn plate was the key to it all? Or was she trying to throw me off, by feeding me disinformation?
I need help with this one, folks. Use the comments link below to analyze that freakiness.
And we’ll also lift the ban for a day, and allow weird dream stories. If you have anything to share, today’s the day.
See you again tomorrow!