I posted the above graphic on Facebook a few days ago, but find it interesting so I’m posting it here too. It’s supposedly baseball territory, where fans for each team live. So, the Angels and White Sox have no fans? I’m unclear. How accurate is this thing? All I know is… the Reds info seems relatively correct. What are your thoughts?

It snowed here last night, the first snow o’ the season. It’s not much, but it’s enough to cause some elevated profanity production. There’s reportedly a thick layer of ice underneath it, too. I haven’t been out there but both of the boys were bitchin’. …I’m not ready for this crap. Oh well. According to this website, spring training starts in 91 days. That seems like both a long time and right around the corner. How is that possible?

Two nights ago I was in bed, around 12:45, reading. And I heard a very loud roar approaching from far away. It got louder and louder, and whatever it was zipped right over our house, super-loud. It sounded like a big-ass military helicopter, and that shit was moving. The next morning I asked everyone if they’d heard it and they all said no, and were also not interested in discussing it further. But you don’t understand, I shouted, it was really loud and low! The shrugs of emphatic disinterest annoyed me. Why does nobody care?! The younger boy told me it was probably a drone. It shook the house, I hollered. It was no drone, it was a helicopter. Or an extraterrestrial ship of some sort, from a disappointing galaxy where they haven’t figured out how to make their shit silent yet. At that point, he disengaged and made it clear he was only humoring me. Highly unsatisfactory.

Another mystery… Toney and I went out for a couple of beers this past weekend, to a place near us called Tully’s. They have a decent beer selection and really good appetizers ‘n’ stuff. They also fill growlers for a good price, so I took one along. Everything was fine at the restaurant, we had a good time, etc. But when we got home and started drinking the beer from the growler it felt like we were instantly semi-drunk. Indeed, Toney went to bed early because she said she didn’t feel well. And I was quickly heading into “hammered” territory too. WTF? It was just some IPA, with a listed alcohol content of something like 6.5%. Nothing that should launch two seasoned beer drinkers into a state of insta-smashed. We had two beers each at the restaurant, nothing crazy. But once we started drinking the growler beer everything went wonky on us. The weird thing? It was something called Great Lakes New American IPA. And I can find no evidence that it even exists in this world. I did some Google searches and checked out Beer Advocate, as well as the Great Lakes Brewing website. There’s nothing called New American IPA that I could find. What in the pimple popping hell is going on here? What did we drink? It was tasty, whatever it was.

I posted a new episode of the podcast late last night. Here’s the description: In this one, I tell you about the days before cable TV and the crazy exhilarating world that emerged once cable took hold. I go into detail about two early cable channels (and their unforgettable ads) that meant a great deal to a young up-and-coming Jeff Kay. Then I share a great hotline message from Ian in Scotland. I hope you enjoy it. Thanks for listening! And here’s the fancy-ass player, or you can grab it wherever you get your podcasts.

I’m supposed to go to Cooperstown on Friday, with Steve. Hopefully, there won’t be any weather issues. Right now it looks good… We’re planning to visit the Baseball Hall of Fame again. We used to go yearly, but have gotten out of the habit. I’m pushing to get it started up again. If we go (sausage fingers crossed) I’ll be posting many a photo to Instagram. Follow me if you ain’t.

And I need to call it a day here. For a Question, I’d like to know whether or not you wear a watch. I don’t and never have. If you do, how many watches do you own? How does this whole watch-wearing culture work? Do you have to have many and switch them out? Or is it just one watch used daily? I don’t personally require a clock strapped to my person at all times, but I believe I’m in the minority. What do you have on this mysterious, murky subject? Tell us about it in the comments.

And I’ll see you guys again soon.

Have a great day!

Support us with a monthly $4 donation at Patreon, and get an extra podcast episode every week! We’re also at Venmo (@thewvsr) and PayPal (jeff@thewvsr.com). Thank you, guys!

In the latest episode of the podcast, I talk about running into someone from work in an unlikely place. It blew my mind a little. I’d like to know about the crazy places you’ve encountered people you know. While traveling, perhaps? I remember when I was a kid we’d always see people from Dunbar in Myrtle Beach. I guess it’s not that weird since it was the accepted vacation spot of the greater Charleston metropolitan area. But it amazed me, nonetheless, seeing those folks WAY out of context. What do you have on this one? Use the comments section.

And here’s the description for the new podcast episode, along with the fancy listenin’ engine. Or whatever.

In this one, I tell you about the adventure we got ourselves into while returning Dusty the Bellringer on Saturday, how I ran into someone from work in a highly unlikely place, the update(?!) I received about my Ancestry DNA results, and how I could almost certainly be hypnotized. Then I play a message left on the hotline all the way from Scotland. I hope you enjoy it. Thanks for listening!

I’m cooking a big pot o’ beans as I type this. Like a granny! Hey, all I know is… they’re delicious and make the house smell fantastic. As I threatened last time, I’m trying to take my lunch to work now, and this is Day Two of the experiment. I’ve had it with the food situation there and need to take matters into my own hands. So, today I’m going to take a big bowl of so-called white beans (navy beans? great northerns?), a ham sandwich, and some other odds and ends. It requires some prep, but I won’t be out there driving to the world’s worst McDonald’s tonight, or visiting the bum-spangled Burger King. Which will save me some money and lower my daily sodium intake by roughly a million… watts? Hey, I never said I was a scientist.

For the record, I made a previous mess o’ beans on Sunday, but everybody ate them in short order. They were great! I put a big smoky ham hock in there, and it was nothing short of delicious. Not to mention filling. And it costs something like two dollars! Sure, I might be farting down cubicle walls by 9 pm, but only others will suffer.

I don’t want to go on and on about it, but I think beans are a forgotten food item in 2019. They’re great! Very underrated. Who’s with me?! …Hello?

A few days ago Ancestry sent me an email saying my DNA results have been “updated.” They mentioned this early in the process, that the science is always evolving and being refined or somesuch. And I might receive updated info. In any case, here’s how it looks now. Previously it was 64% England, Wales & Northwestern Europe, and 36% Ireland & Scotland. So, the England part was increased, and the Ireland/Scotland hunk was split off with some Viking. Huh. Maybe my Mom is right… it’s all a bunch of crap?

Finally, I listened to the penultimate album by the mighty Ass Ponys while writing this update, which is called Some Stupid With A Flare Gun. I love all things Ass Ponys, as well as Chuck Cleaver’s later and current band Wussy. But I especially like his earlier band’s final two albums, created after being dropped by a major label. Many groups don’t survive such a thing, but they rebounded with their best work. Great, great stuff! The last album is called Lohio and might even be better than this one. It’s hard to say, ’cause they’re both masterpieces.

I hope you guys enjoyed this quickie. Please don’t forget to tell us about your coincidental encounters in far-flung locales, and I’d also be interested to know what you believe are grossly underrated foods. Tell us all about it in the comments.

And I’ll see you again soon!

Have a great one.

Support us with a monthly $4 donation at Patreon, and get an extra podcast episode every week! We’re also at Venmo (@thewvsr) and PayPal (jeff@thewvsr.com). Thank you, guys!

I’m in the midst of a work-lunch crisis, my friends, and have decided to take drastic action. Yes, you guessed it, I’ve now reached a level of desperation where I’m planning to take my own food. …Will somebody please hold me? This is uncharted territory, and I’m a little scared. You can hear me go on and on about it and rant like a crazy person in the brand new episode o’ the podcast. At the fancy-tits widget below, or wherever you get your podcasts. I also share a couple of crazy messages left at the hotline. Enjoy! It’s fun.

Speaking of podcasts, I’ve started listening to a new one called Root of Evil. Wild shit! Here’s a Rolling Stone article about it. It’s an eight-episode documentary that proves the old “truth is stranger than fiction” adage. It’s about an incredibly fucked-up family (and I do mean incredibly), told by their modern-day descendants. Oh, this thing has it all… Murder, incest, drugs, Man Ray, the Black Dahlia. It is crazy, and extremely well-done. If you’re into that sort of thing, I’m confident you’ll love it.

Another thing I’m currently enjoying is an animated series on Netflix called Big Mouth. I was unfamiliar until a guy at work started raving about it. Apparently, it’s popular, ’cause Netflix just renewed it for three more seasons. In any case, it’s about Middle School kids going through Middle School things. It’s raunchy as hell and very funny. Not to mention somewhat bizarre. Like, for instance, the ghost of Duke Ellington living in the attic? I never could’ve predicted it. If you like the idea of a filthy version of Freaks and Geeks, you should definitely check this one out. It’s not just 100% filth, though. It also has the Freaks and Geeks heart and is highly recommended.

I also just started watching Season Three of Goliath on Amazon Prime. Do you watch this show? It stars Billy Bob Thornton as a brilliant lawyer who’s attempting to turn his back on the profession and quietly drink himself to death. But he keeps getting sucked back in, which interrupts his self-destruction. I enjoy it a great deal. I wasn’t aware Season Three had been released until a few days ago and watched three one-hour episodes in one sitting over the weekend. I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone who knows about this show, which concerns me. I ask people, and they always say, “Never heard of it.” So, I’m worried it’ll go away. It’s really good. Are you familiar?

And, of course, the World Series starts tonight. I’ll be following that too. Unfortunately, I don’t hate either team, so it’s difficult to know who to pull for. I love the Reds, am indifferent about a lot of teams and hate a few. Both the Nationals and Astros fall into the middle category, which doesn’t help me at all. Oh well. It’ll be the last scraps o’ baseball for about four months, so I’ll be clinging to it while it lasts. On a semi-related note, are you familiar with a Twitter account called Baseball’s Best Fans? It’s one of those perfect ideas that make you grumble that you didn’t think of it first. The guy simply retweets shitty things that St. Louis Cardinals fans — supposedly baseball’s best fans — post on the internet. You could do this for any team, of course. But other teams don’t have the BEST FANS reputation. It’s good stuff.

I didn’t get nearly enough sleep last night. Ugh. I’m already dragging. It’s my own fault, too. Oh well.

If you’d like to bring us up to date on how you handle the lunch-at-work situation, please do. Use the comments section. Also, if there’s something you’re currently enjoying, please share that, as well. It’s not all cynicism and negativity around here.

I’m calling it a day, my friends. Thanks for reading! I was listening to Bakesale by Sebadoh while writing this one, in case you’re keeping an Excel file or something.

I’ll be back soon.

Support us with a monthly $4 donation at Patreon, and get an extra podcast episode every week! We’re also at Venmo (@thewvsr) and PayPal (jeff@thewvsr.com). Thank you, guys!

I’m talking specifically about school, but liked that picture so much I used it anyway. Is it real? I don’t think he’s going to make it. And ol’ Hangover Johnny over there on the porch needs to step in. Right? In any case, do you have any interesting memories of 4th Grade? I do, and they’re predictably weird. Why don’t I remember the normal, wonderful times? It’s always with the fucked-upness… And I break it all down for you in the latest episode of The West Virginia Surf Report podcast, available at the magic widget below, or wherever you get podcasts. Oh, it’s out there, insinuating itself into polite society. Check it out!

After this week I won’t be working many 5-day weeks for the remainder of the year. There might be one or two in there, but it’s mostly 4-day extravaganzas, on account of my need to burn vacation time before the end of the year. It’s great! I just took many Fridays and a few Mondays, here and there. And I have nothing planned, except I might go to Cooperstown with Steve, to visit the Baseball Hall of Fame in early November. We used to go yearly but got out of the habit. I’m pushing to get it started again. Other than that… just long, glorious weekends! I’m a confirmed fan of the long, glorious weekend.

And for Thanksgiving, it’ll be just like last year. I snapped this photo when dinner was ready on Thanksgiving 2018. I’ll have to discuss it with Toney, but I’m thinking that this year we’ll just sit it in the middle of the table, rip off the top, and eat straight out of the box. Or maybe just pass the box around the living room, and not even bother with going to the table. It’s still a work in process. I’ll keep you updated.

It’s been years in the making, but I finally finished watching The Fugitive TV show. Season 4 was wildly uneven, and not as much fun as the previous three seasons. So… I started it many times and kept throwing in the towel. But I wanted to see how they wrapped it up and wasn’t willing to just jump to the final two episodes (parts I and II). Those episodes were a huge deal when they were first broadcast, and are still among the most-watched scripted shows in history. Here’s a good article about How The Fugitive’s Heart-Pounding Finale Changed TV Forever. Awesome!

David Janssen, who masterfully played Dr. Richard Kimble aka The Fugitive, died young. And this incredible paragraph from his Wikipedia page blows my mind every time I read it. Check this shit out:

A heavy drinker and a four-pack-a-day smoker, Janssen died of a heart attack in the early morning of February 13, 1980, at his home in Malibu, California at the age of 48. Janssen was buried at the Hillside Memorial Park Cemetery in Culver City, California. A non-denominational funeral was held at the Jewish chapel of the cemetery on February 17. Suzanne Pleshette delivered the eulogy at the request of Janssen’s widow. Milton Berle, Johnny Carson, Tommy Gallagher, Richard Harris, Stan Herman, Rod Stewart, and Gregory Peck were among Janssen’s pallbearers. Honorary pallbearers included Jack Lemmon, George Peppard, James Stewart, and Danny Thomas.

My first thought: four packs per day?! Sweet sainted mother of ol’ Hangover Johnny! Also: based on the rest of that ‘graph, it was clear the man ran wide-open. Johnny Carson… Rod Stewart… Gregory Peck… Milton Berle… I feel like he had some fun in his short life. What do you think? Incredible.

Finally, I’m still in mourning about being jettisoned from the Amazon affiliate program. Ugh. I don’t even want to do the Now Playing In The Bunker thing anymore, but… at the same time, kinda do. So, maybe I’ll just put the cover up and not link to it? We’ll see how that goes. Not sure if it’ll work out long-term. But we’ll give it a shot. As I wrote this update, I was listening to the first Pretenders album, from 1980. One of the all-time greats!

I’m calling it a day, my friends. Don’t forget to share your memories of 4th Grade in the comments. Or whatever else you want to discuss. It’s all good. Mostly, anyway. I think I’m going to go upstairs now and make a ludicrously-large ham sandwich and go all David Janssen with it. No half-stepping, in tribute to the master!

Have a great one, boys and girls.

I’ll be back soon.

Support us with a monthly $4 donation at Patreon, and get an extra podcast episode every week! We’re also at Venmo (@thewvsr) and PayPal (jeff@thewvsr.com). Thank you guys!

Sorry I’ve been away for so long. It wasn’t planned, it just sorta happened. I’ll try not to let it happen again. Ahem. I have a few odds and ends for you guys today: shit’s been building up. So, let’s get to it, shall we?

— I was recently in West Virginia, visiting my parents. It went well, thanks for asking. On Sunday all my living aunts and uncles converged on the place, along with my brother, and here’s the Kay side o’ the family. My mother’s side did not participate in the photo session, but they were there too. It was fun. I’m not sure what’s going on with me, though. It looks like I’d just spotted something suspicious off in the distance, and was trying to figure out what I was seeing. Also, I’m towering over everyone. Oh well.

That’s my brother, my dad, aunt Marg, uncle Danny, aunt Charlotte, and my big doofus ass. “What the hell is that thing?” In any case, it was a fun day: lots of stories and lots of laughs. It was good seeing everyone.

— While in West Virginia I had a few local goals. I wanted to patronize a Tudor’s Biscuit World, go to Budget Tapes and Records, and buy a case of Devil Anse IPA. All are WV exclusives, and I was able to achieve my lofty goals. At Tudor’s I had a bacon and cheese biscuit, and it was both huge and tasty. It’s good for you, too! Simply packed with nutrients. …OK, it’s just salt and fat. What do you want from me? The people at Budget weren’t friendly, but I spent a half-hour there anyway and actually bought two used CDs from them, both by ELO. Weird… They were super-cheap, and looked like they’d never been played. I got Out of the Blue and A New World Record for a total of $5. Not bad. And I got the case o’ beer at Drug Emporium on Patrick Street, for about $50. It’s not cheap, but it’s damn good. It’s in the downstairs fridge as I type this, chilling and preparing itself for battle. Toney doesn’t like it very well, so I’ll probably drink the whole thing. I’ll try to pace myself and savor it. We’ll see how it goes. If you live away from where you grew up, what MUST you do or buy when you revisit? That’s the Question of the Day. Please let us know. Use the comments section.

— Yesterday I received upsetting news, my friends. After more then fifteen years I was booted from the Amazon affiliate program. They said I violated their Terms of Service by encouraging you guys to click through my links. So, I’m out. No warning… just ACCOUNT CLOSED. The email says it may be appealable, but they’re pretty hardcore. An appeal is a longshot, at best. No, I think I’m at the end of the road with them, which sucks. It makes me sad. I wish they’d issued a warning and allowed me the opportunity to fix the problem. Ugh.

— In more upsetting news, I recently visited a Taco Bell near my job. I always get the same thing, and know exactly how much it costs. This time it was cheaper, and I assumed the dipshit cashier rang it up wrong. So, I snatched the receipt out of his ball-juggling fingers and took a look. Check this shit out! The little prick gave me a Senior Discount. I just looked up from the receipt and said, “Are you serious?” and he about shit himself. We’d had previous encounters, and I clearly unnerve him. He just turned and scampered into the kitchen. Senior discount! Does a senior eat all that stuff? No, he does not! He eats one taco and a small coffee. I’m getting fired up just thinking about it.

— Toney texted me this link earlier and wrote, “This is the most Pennsylvania thing you’re going to see all day.” Check it out. The local news station has a hotline where people can call in and leave comments on whatever subject they choose, and it’s comedy gold. This is a weekly recap, I believe, not the main Talkback 16, or whatever they call it. Anyway, you should check it out. It’s good stuff.

— And finally… I have a new episode of the podcast for you guys and I’m pretty happy with the way it turned out. The bulk of it was recorded while driving on my West Virginia trip. It’s an unusual episode; I’d never attempted field recordings before. Some of it’s kinda rough, but there are laughs for sure. Give it a listen if you get the chance. At the handy widget below, or wherever you normally get your podcasts. It’s out there, available everywhere.

I’m calling it a day, boys and girls. One more day of work, and it’s the weekend already. Pretty nifty! I could get used to the two-day workweek.

Have a great one! And don’t forget the Question. Use the comments section.

And I’ll be back soon.

Support us with a monthly donation at Patreon, and get an extra podcast episode every week!