Another Reason Why I Am Like I Am
When I was eleven years old, or so, my mother came home with an armload of another kid’s underwear. Horrified all the way down to my skeleton, I listened to her explain that the boy’s mother gave them to her, because they were too small for him.
I couldn’t believe what was happening before me. She put the big pile of unthinkables into my top drawer, and apparently believed I was going to wear them. I told her differently, and an argument ensued.
“Oh Jeff, they’ve all been washed!” she yelled, as if that made the tiniest of differences. A whole other set of genitalia had been dropped into those things; I didn’t even want to be in the same room as them. It wouldn’t have mattered if they’d been boiled in bleach.
My mother thought I was being overly difficult, but I wasn’t playing around. I could see a faint washed-out skidmark in one of the pairs near the top of the pile. It was incomprehensible that she’d expect me to put them on. I’m shaking my head even now, thirty-five years later, in disbelief.
She finally got mad, and stormed out of the room.
I looked into my sock and underwear drawer, and saw the horrible contraband coming in direct contact with my things. My brother had been lurking and keeping quiet, but after our mother left he buckled over in laughter. Even though there was nothing – nothing! – funny about it.
Under the circumstances I had only one real option. I found a pencil, or a ruler, and started rearranging stuff in the drawer. I moved all my good underwear over to the left side, and the kid’s from across the street(!?) to the right. Then I built a barrier in the middle, using a wall of socks.
I figured if any foreign ball spores leaped off those JCPenney Towncrafts, only my feet were at risk. And I walked around barefoot all the time, through spit and vomit probably, so my feet could very likely handle the influx.
When my dad got home from work, my mom told him the story. And, to my immense relief, he took my side. He told my mother it was kind of unreasonable to ask a boy to wear another boy’s underwear. Whew.
But some kind of compromise was reached, and I can’t remember the details. I didn’t have to actually wear the terrible things, but they remained in my drawer for many months – way over to the right.
It’s a wonder I didn’t end up in the wacky shack.
And why am I bringing up this story, you ask? Because I was talking to my Mom yesterday, and she told me the kid from across the street had recently undergone a full hip replacement.
“Remember when you tried to make me wear his underwear?” I asked.
“What?” she said, confused.
“His mother gave you a load of his nasty white briefs, and you wanted me to wear them. One had a skidmark in it!”
“Oh Jeff, you know that never happened.”
And so it goes…
I’ve noticed that a few Surf Reporters have become a bit exasperated recently, because their comments were sent to “moderation,” and stayed there for a long time. So, I thought I’d take a moment to explain…
Website comments are constantly bombarded with spam. It’s as bad, if not worse, as email. And to keep the crap from splashing onto the site, I have a filter installed, called Akismet. It does a pretty good job (3708 spam messages caught since we moved to WordPress), but it’s not perfect.
Therefore… I also have it configured so the first comment from an IP address, or with an unrecognized email address, has to be approved by me. I weed out a lot of garbage that way, almost every day of the week.
So, if you’ve never posted a comment before, are using a new computer, or type in a novelty email address, your message will be sent to purgatory. And if that happens while I’m at work, it’ll likely stay there for a while.
The good news: after you’re approved once, your messages will go straight to the site, without delay. It’s just that first one that might be delayed. You know, so I can be sure you’re not trying to sell sex “vacations” to Singapore, or whatever.
And that’s the reason some of your comments go into moderation. This tutorial was brought to you by the makers of the new Aveeno Apricot Ass Mask — because your ass deserves the very best.
Finally, I have a quick and simple Question for you guys. I’d like to know what musicians, bands or individual artists, have the most annoying fans.
A few leap immediately to my mind: Radiohead, Elvis Presley, Michael Jackson, Lynyrd Skynyrd, the Grateful Dead…
Help me complete the list, won’t you? Use the (lightly moderated) comments section below, and we’ll try to get a handle on this most pressing of issues.
And that’s all for today, boys and girls.
We’ll do it again tomorrow.
Filed under: Daily
Just got here…
now to go back and read today’s posting!
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Number 1
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Phish. Those fans are gross on incomprehensible levels. Take a bath and put away the bongo drums.
I cringe thinking about it.
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Damn It!
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Hello There!
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Our neighbors recently gave us a really nice wooden chest of drawers that they no longer had room for. When I was putting the drawers back into it, I noticed a pair of socks that had tried to escape. They were obviously clean (unless the neighbor folds his socks together again after wearing them). My wife was going over to get the small drawer that we had missed and I asked her to return the socks. You would have thought I’d asked her to return a soiled diaper! She said to just throw them away, she wasn’t touching them. This from a woman that has no problem changing the grandson’s full pants. I was a little taken aback. Underwear, I can understand. I wouldn’t touch that myself (I side with Jeff). But socks?
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Mornin’!
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My little cousin got hand me down man-panties.
Gross if you ask me. But I guess when you have to clothe 5 kids you cut some corners here and there.
I was the only girl in my family. Fresh new ones here.
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Tada!
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Remember when Kramer wanted to borrow Jerry Seinfeld’s swim trunks for vacation?
“Aw come on Jerry!”
“No! I don’t your boys down there.”
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I don’t want
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Ahem…still shirtless here.
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I’d have to say Boy Bands, which I suppose right now would be the Jonas Brothers.
I worked at a music store for 3 very formative years of my life (ages 16-19) and it was a Ticketmaster outlet as well. The only time idiots ever lined up outside the night before was for N*Sync tickets. This was after we explained that what they were doing was pointless because of Ticketmaster’s lottery system. Oh, and the following morning when they were let inside the store they felt it necessary to play with every trinket we sold (and we sold a lot of stupid shit, including action figures of Pujols and farting keychains).
Referring to the earlier comment about Phish, we did an on-sale for a concert of theirs as well, and their fans actually weren’t that bad. Sure, they reeked of patchouli and said “man” a lot, but they were fairly easy-going and certainly less tightly wound than the N*Syncers.
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Dave Matthews Band fans are intolerable.
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Son of Sam, send me an email with your address, etc. Every shirt was mailed on Saturday 3/14. If you haven’t received it, there’s a problem.
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My mother never made me wear underwear….but were sometimes rare shoppers of the Goodwill/ Salvation Army…I took it to often in my older years…and still meanter around there sometimes. She did like to throw my stuff out though, (God I loved those VANS) but Used underware is a no no…I almost felt tears coming from that horriine ordeal.
Musicans w/ the most annoying fans…….James Taylor.
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and pretty much every hippe jam band known to man
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U2, sanctimonious jerks, have you ever seen a whole parking lot full of prius’s & smart cars??
Go to a U2 concert.
Used underwear are weapons and should only be used for evil purposes. Like slip a pair into the glove box of an enemy. Giggle to yourself, then move forward.
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oops forgot to proofread
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Oh, and Bob Dylan, even his “fans” don’t know what the hell he just said. What would be the point of that show?
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I grew up wearing hand me downs from my cousins.
The year I turned 11, the hand me downs included panties.
My mother refused to buy me new ones and insisted I wear the hand me down ones.
I was mortified.
I had begun to grow hair in funny places and I was already kind of “sensitive” about that area anyway.
There was NO FREAKIN WAY I was going to wear panties that had touched another person’s “privates”.
So…I went without panties for an entire summer because I had nothing else to wear.
It was a well kept secret until I blew the ass out of a pair of shorts at a family picnic and blew my cover.
My mortified Nana went out and bought me new panties the very next day.
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University of Kentucky Basketball Fans. Win every contest. If you’ve ever met one, you’d agree even though Jeff asked about bands, they still win.
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I have to agree with PghSteelerGirl- Phish fan are simply too out there for me. I know someone who used to follow the band everywhere for a couple years. He sold stir-fry out of a van for god’s sake. STIR FRY!!! who goes to a concert and thinks- “hmm… a nice plate of sautee veggies and shrimp sounds good just about now”
Also- all country music fans are annoying. All that hootin’ and hollerin’ is just more than a rock and roll girl like me can take.
The Beatles also had an interesting fan base- crying and fainting is no way enjoy a show!
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The person who hollers “play Free Bird” at a Skynard concert ruins it for me. Other than that, Jimmy Buffet fans reek of Geritol, Ben-Gay , sun tan lotion and Margaritas. Very annoying!!!
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Gustav Mahler fans are the pits!
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Dave Matthews Band – if I took a shot everytime I watched a drunk 14 year old pass out or vomit at a DMB show, I still wouldn’t be as drunk as those kids. Yeesh.
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If ANYONE says “The Grateful Dead’ I’m going to cry. Those are my people. Please don’t diss my peeps. I bought Indian-cotton clothing (with spangles) from many of them back in the day…
@WVULauren – while I do love me some DMB, the ONE conernt I went to would make me agree, the DMB fans are the worst, land or sea.
Seriously, 16-YO girls puke-drunk BEFORE a concert spent their Daddy’s ticket money holed up in a blue plastic box barfing sloe gin fizzes, which ain’t cool fandom.
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Oh wait – I’d like to add that DMB fans under the age of 32 or so are not cool. Us older folks are just fine, thanks very much.
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Dave Matthews fans are a bunch of douchewaffles.
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dave matthews for sure. also creed fans. i shudder at the thought.
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Pink Floyd, Lynyrd Skynyrd and Rolling Stone fans annoy the shit out of me. Skynyrd fans in particular. I’m a card carrying southron hillbilly hayseed redneck and that band and their fans just piss me the hell off.
Fuck. If they only knew I hate Nascar and Lynyrd Skynyrd, enjoy the symphony and opera they’d probably excommunicate me.
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Jeff sent you my address. Like I said I hate to be a pain in the ass but the folks at the P.O. musta fucked up.
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Oh the shame! a recycled update……and how ’bout that Lawrence Welk crowd up here in NEPA
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I’ll second UK fans, with their stupid all blue clothing ensembles, license plate surrounds, and window decals.
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Those polka ladies really piss me off. Dikes, all of them. Dottie Stanky my ass.
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Wiggles fans are the worst…what with their poopy diapers and sippy cups.
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@tiff – at least it ain’t 60 year old women holed up in the blue boxes puking up margaritas and coladas.
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Insane Clown Posse fans are the worst or as they like to be called “Juggalos and Juggalettes.”
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Any of those Disney acts like Jonas Bros, Hannah Montana, etc. Those little girls with their screaming will make your ears bleed.
Clay Aiken fans, “Claymates”…obnoxious (and gay) to the core. Same can be said for Barbra Streisand fans. They’re all almost as unattractive as she is.
Skynyrd fans are far and away some of the drunkest fans I’ve ever encountered, and PHISH/Grateful Dead fans are the smelliest by a long shot.
There is no rival to the general douchebaggery of a bunch of U2 fans.
And while I do like some Buffett, true “Parrotheads” are generally drunk, lazy, and reek of coconut oil and Malibu rum.
No second-hand skivvies for this young lady. I don’t even wear the panties that are sold in the big bins at Victorias…200 people have rummaged their filthy hands through there…and washing them won’t take away the knowledge that other women have touched my panties before me. I order my delicates online and they all come individually packaged. The only person other than me who has touched them is lady 34 who inspected them.
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Nickelback fans are pretty bad, especially when they try so hard to convince you that Nickelback’s music isn’t complete corporate bullshit.
But the cream of the crop in annoying fans is Sublime. We get it, the band liked to smoke weed, you like to smoke weed. Why do you find it necessary to listen to the same 10 damn songs EVERY SINGLE DAY.
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Great White fans piss me off. As soon as trouble starts, they get burning mad.
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Oasis! 90% of the Oasis fan base are douchy drunken frat boys with popped collars that smell like a curious mix of semen and Acqua di gio. Same applies for most Dave Matthews fans. Pantara fans all seem to have an aversion to soap for some reason.
Q: What has 6 teeth and an IQ of 40?
A: The first 10 rows of an Iron Maiden concert.
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lady 34 licks every pair of panties she inspects.
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I have to agree that Phish fans are the absolute worst.
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WVULauren, on March 25th, 2009 at 1:18 pm Said:
Dave Matthews Band fans are intolerable.
agreed.
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2Tall- that was the funniest shit yet! Wiggles fans… Ha!
Tiff- I gotta agree about about deadheads, I know they are your ‘peeps’ but patchouli makes me gag. And any DMB fan over 31 is cool, just saying!
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Phish, Dave Mathews, and any Canadian BNL fans.
I might sound like Spiro Agnew here, but bath, please for all of us.
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Jimmy Buffet, definately.
Any band I like? I can be pretty annoying.
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Cool jazz fans, like my mother, are the worst. If I hear one more thing about Chris Botti I’m going to slip someone some Alli.
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STRYPER fans suck brimstone!
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When I was pregnant with my first child, a co-worker gave me a bag of maternity clothes. She had had a yard sale and whatever hadn’t sold, she put in the bag. Nevermind that she was about 10 inches shorter than me and heavier… I thought maybe if there was a short sleeved shirt in there, that might fit. So, I went rummaging through. There were several pairs of maternity panties, marked as 10 cents each. I mean, really? All I could think was what if she had broken her bag of water or lost her mucous plug in one of those pairs? No thanks! And who would pay ten cents for that, anyway?
It was a sweet gesture on her part, but I got the biggest chuckle out of those panties. I think I did find one shirt in it and the rest got dropped off at Goodwill.
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I’d pay 10 cents for water broke panties.
Just like an ocean spray commercial.
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You know those guys that like to break into women’s houses and steal their panties and sniff them? We – I mean they – could just go to garage sales or the Salvation Army instead! I’m so glad – I mean, I’m sure they’ll be so glad – to know that there’s a better way. Thanks America!
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Yanni fans must be in the top ten, as they are long haired no undie wearing hippi’s or grammas that smell like fart dust.
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I had a pair of hand-me-down briefs for a while when I was a youth. I had two cousins a few years older than I was who lived in Alaska, and once a year my aunt would send a whole box of used clothing down. Some of it was cool stuff, like authentic cold-weather parkas, but a lot of it was just odd.
One year, there was a single pair of army-green briefs with a beige waistband in the box. I thought they were strange, but I wore them anyway. If there were any faded skid marks, they must not have shown against the dark-green fabric. I guess the fact that they were from family made it a little better – but not much now that I’m looking back.
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I can’t stand Amway salesmen that listen to Stravinski.
I also don’t care very much for left-handed Herman’s Hermits fans who insist on wearing jackets in weather that really isn’t all that cold.
And another thing: Why is it that I can’t grow a mullet as nice as some of those Rush fans living in Central Florida? They really get under my skin. And you know why? Thats right; I’m jealous!
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Frank Lloyd Wright. That guy really ticks me off
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Frank Lloyd Wright was a foul mouthed pedophile. His buildings look like shit.
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secretly? i’m lady 34….
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@ Doug – Lick ‘em? Hell! I test ‘em out by wearing them to Dave Mathews concerts!
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Any concert where there are a bunch of screamin, slutty-dressin, caked-on makeup-wearin, gum-chewin, lite-weight-alcohol-yakin teeny-boppers can make you shove a pencil thru your eye.
No bacon-stripped hand-me-down skivvies for me…but I do have a good one that still makes me laugh to this day….A few years back, I attended an estate sale, as I did every weekend to stock my antique shop. The sale was run by “the family” instead of professional liquidators. The house was filled with unique items including the desk I bought that was quite large.
The son of the departed helped us load it into our van. While removing the drawers for easier lifting…a HUGE old plastic DILDO fell onto the ground. Beautiful!! The stuttering, tongue tied son eventually spit out that it was his father”s desk and can’t image where this “thing” came from and that we could have it at no charge! Now THAT’S a hand-me-down.
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Oh…I am not a Dave Matthew’s fan. Everyone says their fan’s are annoying as fuck…WHY?
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omigod Jeff!! My mother came home with panties from a garage sale once when I was in my twenties and got horribly horribly offended when I made fun of her. She was all “they are new” and I was just mortified that she even thought that buying someone elses undies was acceptable. Very strange. I believe i made her cry over the whole ordeal but she did wear them. She is a freak of nature she will spend 5K on a light fixture and wear someone elses underwear. WTF??!
2Tall- that is the funniest comment of all- wiggles HA
am i tho only one who finds “parrot heads” to be annoying?? Really?? Jimmy Buffet is highly overrated but any group with tree huggin hippie followers would also be on my list.
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Beatles fans who like to contend that there was no music of any consequence before 1964 annoy the hell out of me.
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Jimmy Buffet fans top my list. Bunch of posers.
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Hand-me-down underwear, mucous plugs, breaking water, fart dust old ladies. Man, what a diverse selection of posts today.
Tammie, Nana should have bought you a new razor, then you won’t need the panties.
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I can easily 1up your story Jeff
My older brother got a complete wardrobe from a dead kid.
(Underwear included)
.. and he was a family friend.
Creepy.
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I was definitely not exasperated, Jeff, just amused.
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Sorry Lew in Bama – I work at the online store your order from and let me assure you that you have come in contact with my DNA.
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Good Early Evening Late Afternoon Surf Reporters…….
…and just when is the time of day when afternoon becomes evening? At dusk? After 5:00?
I digress.
As a long term, pre-90′s, formally rehabilitated Dead Head, I can say this: Prior to the Dead becoming “commercialized” with their top 40 hit “Touch of Gray”, the crowd / fans were some of the best, most mellow down to earth nicest people you would ever want to meet. Everywhere was a cool scene and we left nothing but footprints after a show.
But then the young’ins had to fuck it all up and ruin it for the rest of us(gate crashing, fist fights, vandalism etc.etc., just not cool, man).
I’m a DMB fan and over the age of 30′ish, so once again, the “grown ups” know how to handle the scene and not harsh anyone’s buzz. But then load up the amphitheater with an over abundance of drunken choad frat boys and their shit for brains girlfriends screaming “Watchtower!!!” and there you have the recipe for true assholery.
Fans that I view as if they’re wearing a concert shirt made of turds?
Nirvana, KISS, Ozzy Osbourne, Jimmy Buffet, any pre-teen or tweener boy/girl group, The Kingston Trio, Sade, New Orleans Preservation Hall Jazz Band and the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.
Oh, and the Trans Siberian Orchestra, them too.
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Really? No one has said KISS?
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For some reason, Elvis Costello fans irritate the piss out of me.
And – I’m surprised Wordnerd isn’t all over your obvious grammar issue…..
” It’s as bad, if not worse, as email. ” should’ve been “It’s as bad as, if not worse than e-mail.”
Wordnerd – please let me know if I missed a comma…..
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What has 10 legs, 9 arms, and sucks?
Def Leppard
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Dictators fans… Very, very strange
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As a late comer to this site, I thought I had read through the whole archive. Then Jeff mentions his brother today and I realize I missed something somewhere. Jeff has a brother? I don’t remember any brother stories? Where are the brother stories?
Is it an older brother? Seems like he would be if he laughed at Jeff. I never laughed at my older brother without getting clocked.
Now what was the question we were supposed to answer today?
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Well, I don’t have any used underwear stories but I can certainly relate to your mom’s selective memory. If my mom is to be believed, my childhood with her was nothing but puppies and rainbows. Everything else is just a figment of my imagination.
As far as annoying fans go, you can’t get much more obnoxious than a Barry Manilow Fanilow.
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Yoko Ono…all 4 of her fans….I just don’t get it..
Toby Keith fans..hell even his music is cause to change channels
UK fans fall under the heading “over zealous”..dam freaks
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Lee Harvey Ramone! I’m impressed; that’s a fairly mainstream ’70s punk reference, but also a rather obscure Blotto reference! Nicely done.
Also…JCIII, on March 25th, 2009 at 4:15 pm Said:
“when is the time of day when afternoon becomes evening?”
To me, 6:00pm has always been the dividing line – 6:01 is evening. Because the TV listings said so.
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I once went to a jazz fest in NY; the level of smug was so thick I could barely breathe.
I did see Ben Folds on Sunday. Great concert and atmosphere. Jukebox the Ghost opened, definitely worth a listen.
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hardoxdan, I’ve tried that route and that makes for one chilly kitty when you’re wearing a dress.
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I’ll use the word “musician” loosely and say that fans of … Madonna ( gak ! ) would probably be the most annoying group out there. Thankfully I think they’re an endangered species … not a straight male among them.
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yeah I want to know more about the brother too. I’ve been lurking around this site for a couple of years and haven’t heard any brother stories.
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WooHoo! Mike in OH! I was in Lakewood Sunday night too! Tremendous show, Ben Folds is outstanding!
Tilly, I hope you don’t mind, but I have an alternate version of your used underwear anecdote. Now as I remember it, Tilly’s mom was invited to the garage sale of an acquaintance. The acquaintance needed to raise a little money and wanted to get rid of the junk her boyfriend left behind when he went to prison. So, while Tilly’s mom was there she picked up the convict’s left behind weenie bikinis. She then brought them home as a gift for Tilly’s brother.
Tilly’s brother didn’t want the used underwear, and everyone there chimed in trying to explain why he wasn’t being unreasonable. Tilly’s mother said that none of us would ever have anything because we didn’t know how to save money, and we always wanted to spend, spend, spend. As she left the room in tears, Tilly said, “Well that was another fun filled menopause moment.”
Anyway, that’s how I remember it.
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Tammie, Dan can keep kitty warm.
(Second bottle of Smoking Loon Merlot doin’ the talkin’ here)
Did I spell everything right?
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Jeff your story explains everything! Screw Sully Sullenberger you are my New Hero! landing a plane on the Hudson is nothing compared to wearing
another kids tighty whitieswith skidmarks! Semper Fi Big guy!!!
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I’ll take the hit. Buffett rocks. He isn’t a musical genius, but damn, the shows (and music) are fun. Hell, my dad and I (among many others) take a bus to the show every year and have a blast. All night long.
I have no used underwear stories.
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Alice Cooper fans. I called the cops on a shirtless jock slapping the shit out of his girlfriend in the corner at a concert in DC. Of course she defended him when they arrived. There are no earplugs strong enough to stench out the crap that comes from this man’s PA system.
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I gotta say, as I write this, the Grateful Dead is playing, and has been for a while now. I try not to think of myself as an annoying Grateful Dead fan, but boy do I dig them.
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My absolute “best” hand me down was back in the 1960s. My cousin gave me one of his spare double button row shirts just like the Monkees wore. I wore that thing til it almost rotted off my body. While it lasted, I was the coolest kid in the 5th grade at Horace Mann Elementary School!
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well white trash barbie probably remembers it more clearly than I do since i was (and still am) usually drunk.
I forgot you were there but yes she sure did tell us we would always be impoverished!! So funny. good times.
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Jone-ass Brothers.
Brought to you by Sexploration Vacation in Singapore.
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Grateful Dead, Kiss and Dave Mathews.
I’m only talking about the rabid fans of these bands, I consider myself a casual Kiss fan, but I’m not in Gene and Paul’s “Kiss Army”. F that!
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OK kids… I’m confessing: LOVE Def Leppard. One of my favorite’s. I’m an 80′s girl! And Toby Keith…PLEEZ! Hot as hell. I’d blow him on the court house steps in front of the mayor. Those lips and deep voice….Keep the cowboy hat on baby, we’re going for a ride!!
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When I was about 7 or 8, my mother was given a bag or two of hand-me-down clothing for me from an aunt and included was “used” underwear. No way in hell I was wearing those, and my Mom thought I was crazy for not wanting to. I stood my ground and never wore the damned things They got pitched into the trash not long after that.
Annoying: fans of any modern “metal” shit.
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JCIII, Cosgrove – thanks for backing me on the whole “dead” thing. I’m pretty sure I have very fond memories of pre-’touch of gray’ concerts and the experience before and after the show…things are a little, uh, hazy about that, and I’m blaming it on being old.
It would have been cool to catch DMB 10 years ago, before teenybops started in on them. Don’t the chickas know those dudes are old enough to be their Daddies?
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I’m a Dave Matthews Band fan and I’m very tolerable. I’m quite nice to be around, actually. I’ll ask if I can get you a beer or water when I go to the refreshment stand. I’ll say “Pardon me.” if I have to walk past you to get to my seat. If you’re screaming “Halllooowweeeenn” in my ear, I’ll tell you to “Please, shut the fuck up.”
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I stopped going to live concerts for about 20 years. Recently started going again–because strangely my son and I share the same taste in music. I always buy a table in the balcony-’cause folks over 40 needs ta sits. I am appalled by behavior of the youngsters who seem to think it is okay to dance at my table and spill beer on me.
I am kind of thinking I might have to start going to jazz concerts. Anything to keep away from the under-30s. Does anyone think there’s a chance that bands like Modest Mouse or Bright Eyes would consider doing separate shows for us oldsters? I am already buying more expensive tickets~~it’s just not keeping the riff-raff away.
Shudder.
Used bras, anyone??
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I used to get all my cousin’s hand-me-downs, but never the underwear. Even if they’re brand new, there’s something ‘just not right’ about that. Jeff, I was shaking my head right along with you as I read that.
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harumpa – I stopped going to live concerts because of the young pricks and skanks. Their explaination is always the same, “I paid for my ticket!” Right. How’d you like to pay for a feedbag and a wheelchair, prick.
I don’t go to the movies for the same reason.
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Jason, Yeah. I almost had to bitch slap a young man at the last show I went to. Really cool space in downtown Orlando. I couldn’t spring for the VIP section at the venu since my son is well under 21. I think it was some mis-placed PHEESh fan, cause he sure smelled like one. It was strange show as there were midg (excuse me) little people all over the place. So, I thought of you.
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Oh I love midg – little people. They’re so muscular.
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Any band that attracts the “Gray Ponytail” sect.
Is there really anything sadder?
What it says:
At 18 – I’m a rebel!
At 28 – I’m barley employable!
At 38 – I’m unemployed!
At 48 – I’m a loser!
At 58 – I’m living on your tax dollars!
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I’m late to the party, but I have to recommend Heavy Metal Parking Lot on DVD. Link It is a low budget documentary shot in the parking lot of the Capital Centre prior to a 1986 Judas Priest concert. I can’t say that all the fans are totally annoying, but it is a great time capsule. As a bonus, the DVD also has Neil Diamond Parking Lot and Harry Potter Parking Lot as featurettes.
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The most annoying fans are the fans of the bands and or musicians I don’t like.
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Agreed, Susan in NWPA. ICP’s Juggalos make you wish some parents would just eat their young.
Jimmy Buffett fans irritate me. It’s a bunch of office dwellers in tacky shirts who think it’s not a party until the lime hits the shitty sub-par beer. Love Buffett’s music, but the fans annoy.
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douchewaffles- damn Nova, that is one great word.
I hate Jack Johnson, the high horse he rode in on,his fans, and everything they stand for.
wow, I feel so good now.
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The fans of the Cornelius Brother & Sister Rose are the worst! Treat her like a lady indeed!!
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“The good news: after you’re approved once, your messages will go straight to the site, without delay. It’s just that first one that might be delayed. You know, so I can be sure you’re not trying to sell sex “vacations” to Singapore, or whatever.”
What if you are a regular poster selling sex vacations to singapore, or a reasonably singapore like vacation spot, like south charleston?
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In college a dorm-mate was doing his laundry, had just loaded a new load, when another dorm-mate came in with a handful of underwear, and asked the other guy if he could toss the undies in with the guy’s load, since the undie-guy only had a small amount to wash, and didn’t want to pay for a whole load. The request was met with horrified disbelief from the guy paying for the load, who flatly refused the request. I couldn’t blame him.
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I must have started the Jimmy Buffett hate club. Remember folks thats Buffett with two tees.
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@Swami Bologna – must have been the apparent skid marks that hit the refusal button. As long as his name was stenciled on them or he had them in a wash bag and they were tightie whities and I was using bleach (lots of bleach), I wouldn’t mind sharing the wash. When I was in the Navy, we did not have individual washes. Everyone’s clothes got washed communally and you were responsible for separating your clothes in the appropriate bags and you better have had your name on them. Any whites that got mixed in the colored clothes usual came out blue. So if you see any Navy guys with blue tee shirts, well you know why now. Beside, no one had six months of underwear stowed onboard. No way, no how, I shit you not.
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I’ve sold lots of used panties on eBay. What’s odd is that all the buyers were men. I’m pretty sure Farty bought some from me.
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I don’t care. I’ll wear used underware. Worst case scenario, what’s gonna happen? I’ll wash it first, I’m not gross or nothin’. Even if there’s an old skid mark, the bleach disinfects it. It’s a clean skid mark at that point. Germs are good for us by the way. If it don’t kill us then we’re immune to it. Rock on. Drink Red Bull. They pay me when I say that. (not really, I’ll probably get sued actually).
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I can’t do used shoes either. I got plantar’s warts on my feet from a dorm shower once in undergrad and all it took was 10 days of hobbling around on crutches because the freaking podiatrist cut holes in my feet…. that is full-on phobia starter right there.
I find most DMB fans annoying too. Not all… I agree that older ones tend to be normal. South of the 30s is where it gets scary – drunken frat boys and their skanks.
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radiohead is a great band, and probably more talented than most. phish another talented band and both of them are a bunch of fun to dance to. just check your generalizations at the door at most shows, and you could have a great time. I do have to be a huge hypocrite though, and say anyone who kept a hairband on the radio one day longer than they already were (by buying a record) should have all their Mp3′s replaced with Cheeseburger In Paradise.
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brian–Maybe they could just have all their MP3s or CDs replaced by Wendy’s Cheeseburgers….
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Other people’s underwear. Ye gods. For me, the issue never arose as I was the only girl in a world of boys (and while I did wear my little brother’s underwear (bought before he was old enough for it) for a short time because my uncle told me I could become a boy). But I do remember having the same reaction to being made to share sodas with other kids–those kids and their foul sluuuuurp where you just KNEW they were letting some mouthed around soda dribble back into the sraw/can/cup… I’d go thirsty for hours in a hot car. Still will.
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When my Grandmother died, Granddaddy tried to give away her bras and panties. Mom informed him that you throw those away in the nicest voice possible. His response, “What? I paid good money for those! I’m not throwing them away!”
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Even now when friends stay and accidentally leave behind underwear in the freshly washed pile, I can’t bring myself to touch them. Gives me a shiver thinking about it…. Best update for ages, by the way! Me and my wife pissed ourselves laughing all the way through!
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