Big Bread, especially, cannot be trusted, and have their evil tentacles wriggling in places they do not belong. They’re dangerously powerful, and capable of creating a BME (bread & milk emergency), at will.
But I think they’re overplaying their hand this time, by starting their manipulations so early in the season. I believe they’ve made a tactical error, and are at risk of exposing their true intents. I’ve got my fingers crossed that the American people will finally open their eyes to the truth!
If the media weren’t so in-the-tank, they might question the presidential candidates about this disturbing situation, and provide the general public with the information we need. But, of course, not a word is ever said about it. And it’s all so very predictable…
We need to break our dependence on out-of-state bread, crush the Udder Cartel, and apply diplomatic pressure to the hard-charging cookie/cracker union, before this situation compounds itself.
Alas, I see no reason for optimism.
On Saturday morning I had 975 spam messages in my Surf Report email box. A new world record!
I’m very anal about clearing out spam, and delete it roughly twenty times per day. So, all that crapola piled-up Friday night/Saturday morning. And I didn’t do a detailed analysis, but I believe the word “girth” appeared in most of them.
Just so you know…
And speaking of anal (heh), I’m in the midst of a powerful 1970s Elton John jag. I’ve been playing Tumbleweed Connection, Madman Across the Water, and Honky Chateau, as if they’re a source of food and oxygen.
Also, I ordered remastered versions of Captain Fantastic and Goodbye Yellow Brick Road, from my friends at yourmusic. And when the mailman didn’t deliver them this morning, my heart sank. I was one dejected husky-man, in cheeseburger sleeping pants.
I’m starting to get worried. Will somebody please hold me?
And since we’re talking about music, the Suggestaholic made another shrewd suggestion yesterday. If you get the chance, you should check out that movie, ’cause it’s really good. And the autobiography? Even better. Dat’s right.
And you know what‘s really starting to piss me off? Kid Rock, and his retard-o-rama song that’s played every twenty minutes on the radio. You know, the one where he digs up the graves of rock ‘n’ roll royalty, and has his way with the remains?
I can’t take it anymore. I didn’t believe it possible, but that turd is approaching “We Built This City”-level suction.
And I used to like Kid Rock, I really did. Devil Without a Cause is hilarious, rockin’, and fun. What happened? Where did it all go wrong?! That guy is in danger of disappearing up his own exit ramp.
After I bought the Replacements reissues from Amazon recently, they sent me a note telling me they were going to add a year to my Rolling Stone subscription (to show their appreciation). Everybody keeps wanting to add years to my subscription! I think I’m now locked-into that magazine through 2047, and it cost me, like, seven bucks.
I read an article recently that said Rolling Stone has never had as many subscribers as they do right now. In an industry that’s in trouble, they’re somehow thriving.
Yeah, wonder why? When you give the shit away…
And I’m going to close out this rather abbreviated update with a couple items from the Stealing Clive Bull’s Topics desk:
If you could wave a magic wand and change ONE thing about yourself, a physical attribute, what would it be? The obvious answer for men was banned by Clive, so let’s use his rules here, OK?
I can’t really come up with anything, except stuff that could be corrected with exercise and a cutting-back of Funyuns. I don’t have a big ol’ Streisand nose, or anything like that… What about you?
Also, what is your earliest memory? I remember being outside an apartment building on 15th Street in Dunbar, where our fambly lived when I was three years old. A neighbor girl, wearing a dress, was pouring Coke on the sidewalk, and a woman told us to cut it out already.
So, I was three, I guess. Can you trump three? Tell us about it in the comments.
And I need to go to work. Sweet sainted mother of Bobby Buntrock!
I’ll see you guys tomorrow.